The Alchemy of Fire: Arc I
by Shadowhawke
Summary: Arc I of a series: The nature of Fire is that it transforms, and so after their victory the Gaang must deal with the aftermath of ‘peace’ amidst battle, growth, self-discovery, and the startling changes and beauty of love. Based on a slightly AU finale.
1. Where the Stream Ends

**The Alchemy of Fire - Arc I: _Nigredo_  
**

Disclaimer: Mike and Bryan, the show's creators, own Avatar: The Last Airbender, completely. I'm only showing my love of their world by playing in it.

Rating: T for now, just as a precaution. If there are any very violent scenes (and apparently, what I think is violent is really just child's play... ), then I'll be sure to post a warning ahead of the chapter.

--

**Prologue/Chapter One: Where the Stream Ends**

A/N I: As a note, I absolutely loved the finale. However, I also think that Mike and Bryan have given us such beautifully and wonderfully deep characters that there were some possibilities left unmined in the short time they were given to wrap the series up. I am also an unashamed shipper. And so here is my story. I am aware that I'm treading on hallowed ground... there are some absolutely magnificent after-the-war fics out there. I just hope you enjoy this one.

* * *

_Fate is like fire, seductive and sure,_

_With Trial its friend and Challenge as kin,_

_One quest that's been won can lead to five more, _

_For where the stream ends, the ocean begins._

* * *

Zuko paced restlessly, the topknot ready for the flame-embossed crown making him feel a little light-headed. There was too much riding on this. And too much besides the ceremony itself to think about.

"I wonder how he's going," he muttered briefly to himself.

"Who, Aang?" Sokka laughed from where he was sitting, his injured leg propped up beneath him. In his warrior wolf armour, he looked decidedly out of place against the red of the Fire Nation corridor, but the laugh and the grin was all his. Still, his normal exuberance felt restrained by his tiredness and his pain. His anxiety over Katara was still drawn firmly over his skin in lines that overlaid his smile, and at his side, Suki squeezed his hand tighter. "Don't you worry about him." _Worry about my sister. _"He'll be fine. Now he's gotten the Avatar State back, he'll go all glowy and you'll be seeing your dirtbag soldiers coming home in one piece in no time."

Zuko fixed him with a particularly keen glare, glad for the distraction so he didn't have to think about the ceremony minutes away from happening. "Those 'dirtbag soldiers' are kind of mine, now, Sokka."

His injured, erstwhile friend widened his eyes dramatically, before falling back in his chair with a sigh of realisation. "Oh, I see," the Water Tribe Warrior nodded sagely, even while Suki pre-emptively whacked him over the head. "So that just means battalions upon battalions of jerkbender troops. The world sure got better after we won."

Below his breath, the Fire Prince muttered something inarticulate. Sokka laughed again. Suki poked him. The guards standing at the curtain leading to the main Courtyard shifted uncomfortably, and something about their armour and Sokka's words brought Zuko back down to business again.

"I don't think it's my army you have to worry about," he said dryly, his voice low so that only Sokka and Suki could hear him. "There's something else I haven't..."

Too late, he noticed the drawn look in Sokka's eyes again, and cursed himself for bringing up something else that would worry his friend at such an inopportune moment. When one's beloved sister had decided to vanish, it just didn't do to tell him about a possible insurgent movement in the Fire Nation as well. Zuko squirmed and quickly changed tack, hoping that Sokka's pain and worry would be enough to dull his normally astute senses.

"Mentioned. Something I haven't mentioned." At Sokka's skeptical glance, Zuko cursed silently again and fell back on the partial truth. _Why do I have to suck at lying?_ "Like the fact that I'm worried about Katara too."

"Honestly, you two," Suki scolded them before anyone could say anything else, folding her legs and glaring at both. "You're forgetting that Katara's a Master Waterbender! _Everyone_'s forgetting that. Wherever she is, she'll take care of herself until she decides to come back. Besides, doesn't the poor girl deserve a break? She's been running ragged all year taking care of everyone and learning herself."

Sokka's eye's softened slightly. "Still," he said, and he sounded more hurt than anything else. "She could have at least told me. Asked me. Done something..." his thoughts turned in his mind, and he suddenly glanced up at the Fire Prince. "Zuko! It's been just the two of you for the last few days. Did she tell you anything about this?"

Zuko swallowed and looked away for a moment, the movement not lost on either of the warriors. Too late, Sokka remembered again that the ceremony about to take place in half an hour's time wasn't just Zuko's coronation, it was also Azula's funeral.

"She told me a lot of things," Zuko said finally, looking out the window to the Fire Nation docks below. It was a clear, sunny, beautiful day, and the ocean sparkled and smiled under the warmth of the sun. "But I don't know why she left."

The way he said it seemed to end the matter, even though he knew it was far from over. Something painful twitched in his chest, and he raised his fingers immediately to it. They brushed over his ceremonial robes gently, and instinctively traced the hole that his sister had left. Two days of healing by Katara, and he was sure that there would only be a faint scar. He tightened his hand over his heart. Yet another thing to thank her for.

Without meaning to, Zuko began pacing again, his memory stoked into whirring by Sokka's question. It made sense; it _had_ been just the two of them supporting each other in those heady yet devastating hours after their victory over Azula. Time enough between the paperwork and the meetings and the giddy rush of peace orders to sit and talk for a night. It hadn't been deliberate. The paperwork had just proved too much, and shock of everything still hadn't worn off. It had been instinct that had led him from his father's study to the infirmary, and then to the garden for peace. He'd found her then, sitting by the pond and spiralling a single ribbon of water in her hands. And then, somehow, since since they'd been bitter enemies for so long during the war and then respected allies throughout the end of it, it had seemed natural to sit down and talk through the first tentative hours of peace.

Zuko closed his eyes. He hadn't been lying. She had told him a lot of things, but he still couldn't exactly pinpoint which one might have led her to run away.

With a sigh, Zuko gave up and pinched the bridge of his nose. There was far too much to think about why his latest friend had disappeared. Logically, that was. He checked the position of the sun in the sky, feeling his heartbeat squeeze his stomach. Twenty minutes to go before he was Fire Lord. Twenty minutes to go before the crown would settle on his head. Twenty minutes to go before he made his first real political gamble.

Zuko turned abruptly away from the curtain. "Twenty minutes," he repeated unnecessarily.

Sokka rolled his eyes. "Surprise, surprise," he said sardonically. "I don't suppose you realised that it was twenty-five minutes ago five minutes ago?"

Zuko shot him another annoyed look, and Sokka's face softened again. "Really, Zuko. Relax. It'll be fine."

"You don't know that," Zuko said, his voice agitated as his pacing increased. "You have no idea the customs I'm about to break, the rules I'm about to bend. What if it all goes wrong? What if I just end up looking stupid and they hate me?" _What if security does fail and some two-bit assassin ends me?_

Sokka shrugged. "You're the traitor Prince and you're Fire Nation. Most of them already hate you."

This time, the annoyed look morphed into a deadly glare. "Not helping."

It was the Kyoshi warrior's turn to roll her eyes, and she stood up and adjusted her armoured dress. "Look, you two. Just quit it. I can tell you're both nervous, but it'll be fine. We faced down Ozai and the Fire Nation together, all of us. Compared to that, this will be a piece of rice cake."

Behind her, Sokka and Zuko exchanged glances, neither one of them convinced. Finally, Zuko sighed, paused in his pacing, and glanced out to sea again.

"I just wish everyone could be here," he said softly.

Tiredly, Sokka leaned back into the chair, letting its softness take his mind off the twinge in his broken leg. _Katara, you're coming back safely or I'm killing you. _"Don't we all," he muttered dryly.

Suki shook her head and gave up. "All right, you," she said firmly, taking his arm and helping him get to his feet. "We'd better get going. It'll take us around fifteen minutes to get down and find a good place in the audience anyway."

The corners of Zuko's mouth lifted. "Thanks for keeping me company."

Sokka raised his hand as he limped past, and the Water Tribe Warrior and Fire Prince, two boys who had met at opposite ends of a spear, clasped hands briefly.

"No problem, Zuko," Sokka said, his voice warmer than his hands and his eyes softer than both. "I mean, what are friends for, right?"

Zuko tightened his grasp and then let go. For a moment, he watched them leave, before turning back to the awaiting curtain, woven together with the Fire Nation emblem.

Eighteen minutes.

Zuko sighed, and with only the view of his country and the ocean to accompany him, he waited for the sun to reach its zenith.

* * *

_I lost my way once, long ago,_

_Then found it in a second's search,_

_And sold it off to the travelling show,_

_Who left me empty in the lurch._

_But then she found me, one more face,_

_I'd known before my stumbled fall,_

_And led me, sweet and full of grace,_

_To answer when the Spirits Called._

* * *

About one hundred miles away from his fiery friend, Aang wound Appa's reins across his knuckles and shivered slightly. Above the sea, the air was cold. Far, far beneath them, he could feel the restless pull of the ocean as the undercurrents clashed with the waves. He wasn't sure what to think.

"Hey, Twinkletoes. You okay?"

Toph's voice cut sharply through the wind, and Aang sighed. "I'm fine."

Behind him, her rear end firmly seated in Appa's saddle, his earthbending master cocked her head towards the sea. "We're not even on earth, and I can tell you're lying," she said indignantly, the white buds in her hairband ruffling as Appa shifted with a groan beneath her. "You could at least _try_ to make it difficult."

He hid a smile, even though he didn't have to. "Sorry," he called back over his shoulder. "Next time I'll try harder."

A low snort drifted back at him in response, and then Toph twisted out in the saddle, splaying her limbs to its four sides. It was so large and empty without everyone else. She felt a small chill run over her skin. This wasn't how it was meant to be. It just wasn't. Her left toe should have been poking Snoozles in the ribs, her right Sugarqueen, and her elbow grinding somewhere into Sparky's stomach. And as for Fan-Girl...

Toph bit her lip and pulled her arms and legs back in, curling into an unwieldy ball. "You up to this, Twinkletoes?" she demanded abruptly.

Startled by the change, Aang nearly dropped the reins. "Up to what?" he asked, suddenly unsettled.

For a moment, she briefly wished he was in the saddle too... so that she could give him a good whack. "To saving Sparky's soldiers from the tender clutches of the Earth Kingdom, that's what," Toph rolled her eyes. "Been polishing any peace and hope speeches recently?"

She couldn't see him. Or feel him. Or even hear him. But she knew the instant the words were out of her mouth that the wind had changed. At Appa's head, Aang's mouth firmed, and so did his eyes.

"That's Katara's job," he said softly. "But I guess in her absence, I'll have to try."

Something about the way he said it made her heart leap erratically under her skin. No one had asked _her_ of course, but she had to admit she was a little twitchy about this latest mission. They were her people, after all. And they had a right to be furious. Not so long ago, those same men behind the skull masks had been destroying and oppressing everything they loved. Had even tried to burn the Earth Kingdom to the ground.

If she hadn't known Sparky, if she'd been more personally affected... she might have even joined them.

"You'll have to do more than try, Twinkletoes," she finally muttered. The words came out roughtly, like sandpaper against unshed tears. "_Try_ is what you do when you want to learn a new bending move to impress Sugarqueen. _Do_ is what you have to do to stop people from killing each other."

It had never been said so bluntly before, but Aang kept his eyes on the horizon, drawing a strange strength from the land that was approaching over its rim. "I know," he replied steadily. "I know."

Toph hmmphed and then flopped back out again, curling her tiny fingers into a fist as she stared sightlessly at the sky. Moments trickled by in silence, until even her corded muscles began to relax a little. With just the saddle beneath her, no other heartbeats besides Appa's big, comforting thumps, Toph felt as if she was alone. Or at the very least, she could pretend. It helped that Sugarqueen and Sparky weren't in the same saddle... even after they had decided to stop avoiding each other, their blood had still drummed erratically. Toph screwed up her face. And in a way, maybe it wasn't so bad that Snoozles and Fan-Girl weren't there either, so her supersensitive ears didn't have to hear their whispers and lip-smacking and...

_Not going there, _Toph resolutely thought, and concentrated back on pretending to be alone. Because when she was alone, she could let herself crack a little, let the walls loosen and the rock slide free from within.

She could stop being the strong one for a little while.

Toph had had plenty of time alone to learn to be strong, to be as tough and stubborn as the element she bended when she'd been at home. But since they'd left, there'd barely been a minute of real rest. Since their pursuit by Azula, the task had fallen on her to warn the Gaang of any approaching danger, even while they slept. Nobody had told her to do that (not even Sugarqueen, surprisingly enough...). Nobody had designated it, or even just suggested it. But it had been there, unspoken, and she hadn't really gotten a proper night's sleep since. Even when they'd been exhausted, when her muscles had ached from moving mountains all week long, a part of her had always stayed awake, measuring the ground with steady fingers.

But there was no need for that, up in the air.

"Hey, Toph?"

Her eyes snapped open, purely out of instinct since it didn't really change anything. "What?" she snapped, irritation laid thick in her voice.

There was a pause, and then... "Thanks again," he said quietly, and although she couldn't see it as he turned from the horizon ahead to face her, she could hear the sincerity in his gaze. "For clearing my head. I needed that."

It was probably the complete and utter honesty in his voice that did her in. '_Clearing my head...' what a nice way to put pinning you to the ground until you saw sense. _Her life had been a lie, after all. Or rather, her existence. "You're welcome," she said shortly, and then relented. Sitting up, she curled her arms around her knees and rested her chin between them. If she could have, she would have stared out contemplatively into the sky.

"You know, you really don't have to worry about Sugarqueen," she said clumsily, instinctively zeroing in on his hesitation. "It's not as if she's off on some dangerous quest or anything, she just wants to have a break for a while. She can take care of herself. She'll be fine"

The words stirred something deep within him, and Aang sighed. "I know," he repeated, but this one sounded a little more dejected. "It's just that it's hard. We've never fought like that before, and I still," he gulped hesitantly, and then plunged ahead. "I still can't believe she killed Azula."

Toph swung around. The movement made her back leave the comforting reassurance of the saddle, and for an instant the rush of air left her heady. It was just the right amount of rush to fuel her words.

_Honestly, if I have to speak to anyone else about this one more time, I'm going to start charging counselling fees. _

"I still can't believe the two of you are being so damn ridiculous!" she waved her hands in the air. "Would you have rather Zuko died? Or Katara?"

"What? No!" Aang recoiled.

"Then what bothers you more, Twinkletoes?" the earthbender asked brutally. "The fact that she killed Azula to save Sparky, or the fact that Sugarqueen is less perfect than you want her to be?"

Aang fish-mouthed. "I..."

Somehow, she felt it the instant he did. For him, it was like a crackle of blue-white electricity from far, far away, its current hissing over his skin. For her, it was the sudden freezing of the air from his direction, and she scrambled to her feet almost by instinct.

"Twinkletoes?"

His hands gripped the reins, knuckles white at the edges. Glad that he didn't have to answer her former question, even though he'd forgotten it already "It's her."

Toph crossed her arms over her chest, as if she could hold her heartbeat in that way. "A little more detail, please?!"

He didn't seem to hear. "Katara," he whispered, and then his legs were moving and he was jerking up, running back over to leap into the saddle and seize Toph's hands. She oomphed at the sudden contact as he brought her crashing down beside him in a tangled mess. Instantly, she opened her mouth to yelp out an indignant "Hey!", but then she registered his panicking breathing and instantly went serious.

"Aang?"

He didn't notice his name. "It's Katara," he whispered. "She's in the Spirit World. I can feel it. Please..." he squeezed her fingers tighter, and she wondered if he'd cut off the blood flow. "Anchor me. I'm going in after her."

Now, Toph did yelp. "What do you mean by 'anchor' you? Hey! Listen to me, Twinkletoes, I don't know anything about this spirit-stuff, so you're going to explain it to me before..."

She halted abruptly, suddenly aware of the great, awesome stillness around her. The grip that had tightened around her loosened, imperceptibly at first, before falling away completely. It took a few seconds for her to reach out and grab him back, and then she felt a listless body fall into her lap.

"Twinkletoes?" she asked uncertainly.

But he was already gone,

* * *

Before him, two fish circled, yin and yang, white and black, perfect complementary opposites forever entwined in the push and pull of life. Over the image, an ancient voice murmured prayers, the chant accompanied by the the soft splashing sound of water. Aang opened his eyes.

The Spirit World seemed to shift a little every time he visited, small increments that used to bother him, but didn't so much anymore now he felt the balance in his blood. Aang stood from where he sat cross-legged, noting the eerie blueness of the world around him. He was back in the Swamp again, or what seemed like a Swamp. As he looked closer, he saw the great hoary trees disappearing into the sky seeming more like a forest than anything, a forest submerged in a scattered lake which left puddles and streams weaving around the vast roots of the earth.

Aang took a tentative step towards what looked like a path, and found himself ankle-deep in a stream. Instinctively, he looked down to place his footing, and found his own reflection gazing back at him. He waited expectantly for a while, hoping that history would repeat itself. But this time, there was no ripples that changed his the water to Roku, and he was forced to glance up.

Just in time to see a blue speck bob amongst the shadows.

"Katara!" he yelled.

She was a retreating form against the darkness, a mere figure. But he could have picked out her silhouette from anywhere, could have recognised the fall of her braid and the slim shape of her body from a mile away. Without thinking, Aang sprinted after her, still calling out her name even while he dodged around flailing branches and nearly slipped on old shivering pebbles under the surface of the water.

"Katara! Katara! KATARA!"

She moved further away from him, following some path through the trees and water that he couldn't see. Frustrated, he launched himself high into the branches, swinging and leaping from one living trunk to the next.

"KATARA!"

It wasn't long until he realised that she couldn't hear him. He'd gotten close enough to see the outline of her face now, and so he could see the direction of her widened eyes as she followed something he couldn't glimpse. Pursing his lips, Aang contented himself with keeping up with her along her invisible path. But as she went deeper down wherever she was headed, he started to fall behind. It was strange... there was nothing in the air in front of him, nothing blocking his way, and yet the further they went, the more it felt like his body was moving through tar even as she almost glided through the water. Finally, the darkness of the forest path opened up into a clearing, and he saw the river pool anxiously around a glittering ice dome.

Katara paused, still facing away from him, but somehow he could tell she was smiling. Then slowly, she raised her hand, and the frost parted like a curtain. Aang watched as she walked through, blissfully unaware of the Avatar hot at her heels, and he sped up his pace as he saw the ice beginning to form again.

But the strange weight that had pulled at his limbs before seemed determined to bring him to the ground now, and by the time he reached the place where she'd been, he was met by the smooth surface of the dome's reformed walls.

"Hey!" Aang cried out indignantly. "HEY! Open up! Avatar here!"

Stubbornly, it didn't respond. Aang hissed frustratedly through his teeth and then tried raising his hand, the way he'd seen Katara do it. But again, nothing happened. He was about to start pounding on its pristine walls when a sharp voice cut into him from behind.

"Oh stop that. You're not going to get in that way."

Aang spun around. When they'd entered, he'd sworn the clearing had been empty. But still, when he turned he found himself face to face with a small Fire Nation girl, her hair pulled up in a dainty ponytail and her golden eyes bright and intelligent. She sat on a rock rising out of the water, her little legs swinging against its surface. There was a certain sweetness about her, sharp-edged, but youthful and innocent nonetheless, and he found himself quirking an eyebrow in faint recognisance.

"Who are you?"

She matched his eyebrow, bend for bend. "You mean you don't recognise me?" she asked, folding her arms. Her sleeves peeked out at the sides of the simple but elegant red tunic, the gold and black embroidery matching her beauty. Mutely, Aang shook his head. She sighed at his response, a little girlish sigh, and then held up her hand to cover one half of her face.

"I must capture the Avatar to regain my honour," she said softly, and when she pulled away her fingers her face was sad. "You can't see the family resemblance?"

It took a moment, but then Aang physically felt his heart fall from his throat into the deepest pits of his stomach. "Azula," he said softly, taking a step towards her. "I'm so sorry, I..."

The little girl snorted, and for a moment, she sounded remarkably like Toph. "What is with you lot and apologising? Was it your fault?" she shook her head adamantly. "_No_. So stop it."

Aang halted, one hand outreached to grasp at nothingness. "It's a little harder than that," he smiled at her painfully. "You see, it kind of is. Maybe if I'd..."

"If you'd what?" she tilted her head. "Done something different? Well, granted, I'd have liked Father, Mother and Zuko here too so we could all be together again, but I guess I'll just have to wait." A shred of mirth glimmered in her eyes, and he was startled to see that it held no rancour. "Are you sure I can't at least have Father? I think he'd be different here. Like me. Like everyone."

Aang swallowed. "Uh, I..."

"No? I didn't think so," the little girls sighed again, more dramatically this time, and hopped down from her perch. Down on the ground, she was a little less than five inches shorter than him, and he guessed that she must only be about four or five years old.

"Hello? Anyone home?"

He blinked, and she chuckled. "Heh, got you there. Anyway, what are you doing here? Last time I checked, your name wasn't on the guest list."

Aang stared at her dumbly. "Guest list?"

She rolled her eyes. "Are you sure you're the Avatar?" she asked irritably, crossing her arms over her chest again. "You seem awfully slow."

He couldn't help it. The corner of his mouth quirked, and then he exploded into a full-blown laugh. It was partly hysteria... there was something so incongruous about seeing Azula here like this, sweetness and sharpness in equal measure. She'd certainly lost none of her deadly intelligence in the transition.

...

And yet it was also partly sadness, a laugh to cover up the choking cry in his throat.

"Oh stop that now!" she stamped her foot before he could blink, and he realised that a thin mist of tears had developed over his vision. "I'm here, I'm dead. It's better than being chained up in jail for the rest of my life, which is what probably would have happened."

He looked at her incredulously. "How can you be so... blase about this?" he demanded. "You're talking about your death as if it was a choice between mango and papaya for breakfast!"

"Mango," she wrinkled her nose. "I hate papaya."

There wasn't much he could say to that. Or anything, really. Her golden eyes pinned him down, saying silent words that he could not respond to, and the only thing that he could think suddenly was that those same eyes that had once aimed a lightning bolt through his chest.

He lowered his gaze first.

"Guest list?" he finally repeated weakly.

That did the trick. Azula rolled her eyes and hmmphed at him, and the air changed back to normal. "Well, if you haven't figured it out yet, it's the people that Katara needs to see while she's here. It's something about finding her path, I think. Anyway, that's not what you're here for."

He stared at her, a little exasperated at being dismissed from his primary goal so quickly. "Oh? So what am I here for then?"

Azula shrugged. "How should I know? I'm only here waiting my turn."

Before he could ask her what she meant, however, a faraway look settled onto her face and she held up her hand, cocking her head slightly as if she was listening to someone. As he watched, an ethereal wind stirred the ebony black strands of her hair, a gentle caress in the Spirit World's strange twilight. Aang sighed again, and _really_ looked at her.

Despite the shock of it all, Azula already looked as if she belonged. The way she moved in this foreign place was comfortable, relaxed. In the glowing blue light, she looked so ephemeral it was hard to recognise her as the adversary he had known in life; the princess so skilled and deadly for her mere fourteen years. So prodigious. So... cold.

He couldn't help but wonder at this transformation. Was this all death was? It had to be more...

But before he could ponder further, her eyes snapped open. For a moment, she looked disgruntled, but then the feeling passed and she laid her arms down to rest loosely at her side.

"Well, well," she said dryly. "Looks like I'm now your tour guide for this round. Follow close and be quick, do you hear me? I don't want to be late for my main appointment."

She moved off before he could respond, and with another sigh, Aang collected his will and followed, taking care to remain on the path that she made. It reassured him that he could see it this time; a strong little road of firmly-packed earth that wound above the water and skirted past the tree roots. It was an easy enough path to follow, and she didn't take him far, or at least it didn't feel that way. Then again, it was the Spirit World, so distance wasn't particularly the most important thing. But before what felt like a minute had gone past, Aang found himself staring at a pool of water a little off the path Katara had been following. He raised his eyebrow. It was kind of muddy.

"And how exactly is this supposed to help me?" he asked.

"Just look _in_ already," Azula answered impatiently, squatting down in the grass. "Really, I expected a fully realised Avatar to be more..."

But even her sharp words couldn't pierce through Aang's sudden attention on the pond. Something was glinting in its depths, and he realised that even though the pool had seemed like little more than a largish puddle from the path, up close it was much deeper, much broader. The wind of the Spirit world breathed across its surface, creating strange ripples that never seemed to reach the edges. And as his eyes traced their movement, he began to see the faintest flickering of a moving image.

They started off indistinct at first, like a ship welling up through the mist. But then as he watched closer, looked harder, the pictures revealed themselves detail by detail, until he could make out the first main one, a scene he'd hoped to find less than a day ago.

Katara's corporeal body sat at the edge of a pool, her brown hair falling freely over her loose blue shift. In front of her, a series of three waterfalls leapt ebulliently through the air to crash into the river, The picture was soundless for a moment, and Aang was about to open his mouth to ask when he heard the faint echoes coming from the water itself, the rush of the waterfalls Katara was sitting besides muted, but definitely there nonetheless.

With the coming of the sound, the picture sharpened, and Aang watched as Katara breathed, watched her sit motionless and still. Watching her, he was surprised to realise that he'd never seen her like this. She'd always been moving in his memory, always reaching out to take care of something or someone else. It was with a shred of guilt that he fixed his eyes on the image until it faded away into the muddy swirls and Aang could see nothing but dirt.

"What...?" he started.

"Shh!" Azula snapped. "You'll miss the next one!"

He clamped his mouth shut, wondering when he'd learn, and focused back on the water. It hovered in front of his eyes innocuously for a moment, before he began to see something else amidst the restless element.

Red. Black. And then a white face with slanted golden eyes and distinct Fire Nation tresses falling down on her thin shoulders. The image blurred a little before zooming out, and then Ty Lee burst into the picture, sweeping a blinking Fire Nation youth in the foreground into an exuberant hug as Mai kept her distance in the shadows, her gaze curious but wary. As Aang focused on her, he saw a flicker pass over her face. There was a shred of something in her eyes that he had never seen before. For a moment, Aang briefly wondered whether it was hope, but then dismissed the thought quickly. Two weeks in prison wasn't going to change _that_ much. Still, it was something, something real, and he was about to open his mouth again when Azula answered for him.

"It's feeling," she said softly, and he turned to see the child gazing at her friends' faces, a curious yearning overlaying her youth. "Mai's feeling something."

"Well sure, doesn't everyone?" Aang shook his head in confusion.

Azula's lips quirked upwards. "Mai's not everyone," she responded cryptically, before directing him back to the pool. In the few seconds he'd glanced up, the image had disappeared, to be replaced by what seemed to be tranquility. A man stood in ceremonial Fire Nation robes before a red curtain, facing a window that looked out towards the sea. The room seemed empty besides its single occupant, but then before Aang could blink, the empty air suddenly filled with flying daggers, a white face of fear, and then strands of glimmering wire arcing through space. The man swung around with a shout, his topknot sweeping his hair back from his face, and Aang gasped as he recognised the scar.

"Did someone just try to kill Zuko?" he gasped.

"Oh Avatar," Azula laughed, the tinkly little giggle coming out of her mouth completely at odds with her innocent smirk. "Since he was born, almost _everyone_'s tried to kill him. And that little trend certainly isn't going to change since he's about to become Fire Lord."

Aang shot an annoyed glare at the girl beside him. "That's not exactly reassuring, Azula," he said severely. It helped that here in the Spirit World, for this amount of time at least, she was eight years younger than him. "Are you telling me that Zuko's in danger? Is that why the Spirits led me here? Because there's a problem with that, I'm kinda flying over to the other side of the world at the moment! I can't exactly fly back, or at least not in time to save him!"

"You know, if you were looking closely enough, you'd have seen that the problem's already been dealt with."

The reprimand in her voice was just as childishly petulant as her sudden pout, and Aang blinked before turning back to the pool once again, one last time as he felt his patience begin to seep away. As if in response, the pool churned more agitatedly this time than ever before, like some warlock's cauldron. And when the image finally appeared, it roared out of the depths like a demon possessed and seized every last inch of all of his senses.

And then, to call it an image became a lie, because he suddenly couldn't look away. Picture after picture flashed before his eyes, some so black he could barely see, others so bright they were like flaming daggers. Dimly, he realised that the pictures had morphed into an Avatar vision, before his consciousness was plunged back into the stream of it, feeling every last empty space plugged up with sounds and sights and smells. The echoes that had accompanied the last scenes metamorphosed into words, some indistinct, some hate-filled, some shouted, and they stormed through his mind like an army of full-clad soldiers. The scent of blood and fire rose up in the air, and he felt sharp metal scrape against his skin as an old, wheezing laugh bubbled in his ears. The vision escalated and whirled, and Aang found himself lost in a typhoon of fear and anger, of old hate and new loathing, and he cried out.

_Three old men sitting around a blocky table. One old woman with her hands clawing at the rain. Two young girls dancing through blasts of fire, the first sleek with water and the other sharp as steel. A mask of blackened flesh that crumbled away to reveal a scar. The earth shifting beneath feet to crush someone's bones to powder. The marching of soldiers' feet over soil and rock, inexorable and deadly. The smell of smoke and burning. Fire. Earth. Water. A child screaming. Someone laughing..._

How long it went for, Aang could not say. All he knew was that each second spent in the ghastly vision stretched out like a moment in a nightmare. When it was over and he finally dared to open his eyes, he found himself on his back, staring at the endless sky of the Spirit World. his thin chest heaving in fevered gasps.

_What was that?_

Slowly he became aware again of the soft earth on his skin, of the grass tickling his bald scalp. Hesitantly, Aang sat up. The muddy pool was still at his feet, but now its ripples were opaque, as if nothing had ever disturbed its surface.

_But something had._

Taking a deep breath, Aang turned slowly to face Azula, his enemy and his slayer, with growing dread in his eyes.

"What was that?" he whispered.

She returned the quiet horror in his gaze with a grim look of her own. "It's what is to come," she answered. "Maybe, Certainly, Almost definitely. I'm afraid I can't really say."

_Well that's helpful, _Aang wanted to bite out, but something in him restrained it. It wasn't her fault, after all. It had been once, but it certainly wasn't now. He looked down at his hands, fingers once used to spinning nothing but marbles with gusts of air, but which now held all the power in the world.

_You'll have to do more than try, Twinkletoes. _

He swallowed. "What do I have to do?" he asked hoarsely.

Azula replied instantly, as if it was the simplest thing in the world. "Whatever you have to."

He looked at her, and she tried to smile at the uncertainty that suddenly overshadowed his face. "Really, I'm sure you'll be fine. That's what you hero-types do, isn't it? Save the world?"

He was suddenly very, very small. "But that... whatever _that_ was..." he took a breath and shrunk in on himself. "I don't feel as if I can save the world."

Azula would have rolled her eyes again, but something in the way he said it made her pause. The former Fire Nation princess bit back the movement and studied him instead. It was incomprehensible that two days ago this boy had stood up to her father and won. But then again, she could see the steel beneath the softness, and she only hoped it would be enough.

"Don't be ridiculous," she said brusquely, in the way only a little girl advising someone over double her age can sound. "You've already saved the world, dum-dum. From my father, remember? And for now, all you need to do is go back. The Spirit World's given you all the answers it can now. The rest is up to you."

_Dum-dum? _Was this how Zuko had felt when he'd been young? Suddenly, Aang wanted to say something, he wanted to say something desperately, but he chose not to. Instead, he set his shoulders for what felt like the hundredth time that day and nodded to her, once.

_I can be strong. _

"Okay," he said at last. And then he concentrated.

The last time, HeiBai had guided his faltering footsteps back. This time, Avatar Aang felt the exact moment when the world around him began to feel even less corporeal, when the mist grew thicker and the strange blue glow grew lighter. He looked up at Azula, one last time, trying to sear the strength she radiated even as a child into his heart.

She was littler than when he first saw her, or perhaps that was his imagination. But what was most striking about her now was that the innocence was gone. Instead, he saw age reflected back at him, an age and a wisdom that somehow seemed settled on the five year old's face. "Good luck," she said seriously. "You're going to need it. You're _all_ going to need it."

Aang smiled. From far away, he could feel the beat of a heart brushing lightly against the skin of his feet. He could take luck. "Um... thanks?"

"You're welcome," she stood up, brushed the grass and leaves from her pants and tossed her ponytail. The mists slowly crawled across his eyes as she turned to leave and retrace her path to the ice dome where they'd met. But just before he felt his spirit shudder back into his body, her eyes flew open in remembrance and she turned. "Oh, wait! One last thing."

Aang tried to focus back on the Spirit World, tried to catch the last words of what had to be something important. "What?"

The little girl suddenly paused, frozen in mid-action. She opened her mouth. She closed it. And then, of all things, Azula _blushed_. A faint tinge of pink stained her childish cheeks, and it looked so foreign to her sharpness that Aang had to blink a few times before the image actually admitted itself to his mind.

And then she was speaking, and he had to shake his head violently to remember to listen.

"More of a warning than anything," she said almost regretfully, like it pained her. "And well... I only really learnt this myself after I came here."

Aang narrowed his eyes. There was something wrong with the way she glanced down at her feet, and the way she'd been blushing not two seconds ago. It didn't seem to fit. But when Azula looked at him again, her gaze was serious.

And for a moment, for just a moment, he really could see the family resemblance.

"Remember you have enemies out there, Avatar. Both you and Zuko. A lot of them. So just be careful, okay? After all, nothing's set in stone."

Aang blinked. Whatever he'd been expecting, it certainly wasn't this. "Careful of what?" he started, before the mists finally closed over and she was gone.

* * *

_And though it ends swiftly and looks to be closed,_

_A tale so great must keep being told,_

_Life moves, as does love, and together they'll show,_

_That destiny's funny when its players are bold._

* * *

-

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A/N II: For anyone confused, yes I have redone this chapter again (for the last time, I promise!), and it is set a few days into the future from when the next chapter picks up quite soon after the final battles. Also, to my other readers... I shall hopefully finish Starlight one day, when that world comes alive for me again.

But in general, thank you for reading this and please drop me a line! Because reviews and constructive criticism (always welcome!) are awesome and inspire me to write faster . Oh, and I'll say it now; I am planning to continue this for what might stretch into a long while, but the exact details are a bit hazy besides the main ones, so you do have a chance to influence where this goes. :)


	2. One Small Twist

**Chapter Two: One Small Twist**

Disclaimer: Mike and Bryan, the show's creators, own Avatar: The Last Airbender, completely. I'm only showing my love of their world by playing in it.

A/N I: Thank you so much to ALL of my reviewers! I was really surprised by how rapid your response was, and very touched that you enjoyed my first chapter. This next chapter was written so quickly mostly because of you! So thanks very much, to you and everyone who is continuing on with this fic, and I hope you all enjoy. :)

* * *

_Fire is life, and it casts light over truth,_

_It reveals who we are and it builds over youth,_

_Its alchemy's strong and its changes are running,_

_And through one small twist, the fire is coming._

* * *

- Three Days Earlier. -

_It hadn't taken the officials (the ones who were left, anyway), all that long to round up the requisite crowd for the royal Agni Kai; the palace courtyard had already been flooded with nobles and commoners alike for Azula's coronation. And thus it was that Katara settled into stance by the side of the golden arena, half a thousand people surrounding her, all watching as the two Fire Nation siblings prepared. _

_Katara breathed, and felt the waters in the aqueduct settle along with her. It was exasperating to wait for battle like this, forced into the shadows by some outdated Fire Nation law preventing her from doing anything to interfere. Katara muttered a few choice words to herself as she picked out Zuko's face from the crimson light streaking the sky. The backglow reddened his scar angrily, but she didn't even notice it as she focused on his face. The face of a friend..._

_Katara's fists clenched._ You'd better win, Zuko_, she thought grimly. _If you're don't, I'm going to kill you myself for being so stupid.

_And as the horrible, impossible thought of failure briefly crossed her mind... it began._

_It started with a flurry of words, arcing harsh and hateful across the air before being deflected by a calm riposte. There was a still breath, a second, and the siblings followed their words with twin unimaginable streams of fire bursting from their hands. And then the two siblings rushed at each other, and within moments the entire arena was filled with billows of blue and gold, crashing in time to the gasps of the audience. Smoke curled across the ground, the fire burning so intense they couldn't look away. Katara couldn't look away. She had never thought that fire could be so beautiful..._

_And then the screams started._

_Katara's head jerked up and her gaze widened. 'Sloppy' wasn't a word you could ever associate with Azula, but at the moment, she couldn't think of anything else. Somehow, blazes of azure flame had eaten into the stands on the side, and people were burning..._

_Katara acted without thinking. Twirling her arms, she pushed and pulled until a stream of water spun from the gates, thinning out into a spider of arms as they chased down the flame. There was a hiss, and then steam and smoke choked the air, and the nobles who had been fighting to escape subsided. With clearing vision, Katara scanned for the injured amidst the tangle of bodies. There were at least three women badly burnt._

_For a moment, she was tempted, so very tempted to damn the rules and bring Azula to the ground. But then as her mind cleared, she saw the people moving, helping their countrymen to the top where the physicians were waiting. Frustrated at her helplessness, she released her lower lip and turned back to the fight... just in time to see Azula panting, low growls erupting from her throat. More flames flew from the arena and into the stands, and Katara instinctively sent her whips out one by one, curling around the fire and never counting the lives she saved. And then the barrage grew and she began resorting to snatching the flame midair, seconds before it hit the onlookers, precision and control in her stance. Some of the crowd began to notice her, the waterbender swathed in blue and was saving their lives. And then the frequency of the flames free-falling into the stand began to increase with such rapidity that Katara no longer watched the fight, her focus solely on preventing people from dying by Azula's hands._

_Not that she needed to watch to know what was happening. The Fire Princess was hurling her blows now, not caring that the force behind them carried past Zuko and reached the sky before raining down onto her would-be subjects._ _And Azula was slipping, she was falling, even as she skated around him on her own power, and snarled, the sound lost behind the roaring of her fire. Sparks skittered from her passage, and then one of her blows swung off to ignite the entire left stand._

_Katara couldn't possibly have stopped it. Infused by the comet and Azula's own hatred, it slammed into the Fire Nation people with a ferocity that none of them had seen before. Katara saw it pass by her in slow motion, saw the flame eat into flesh, and then she opened her mouth and screamed..._

...

Katara jerked upwards, breathing hard, and for a moment she forgot where she was. She could still hear the screaming echoing lifelessly in her ears, could still taste the memory of metallic heat in the air. Disoriented, she shook her head, and somehow, the movement focused her vision again. The reds and golds of the canopy above room slowly appeared, glowing dully in the moonlight as she lay still.

It was over.

Katara exhaled, slow and shaky as she scrambled up to a sitting position on the bed. Shivering slightly despite the heat, she wrapped the sweat-stained blankets around her knees. It was over.

It was over.

... and she wasn't going to get back to sleep tonight.

Katara took another deep, quelling breath, and then threw the covers off her. Slowly, achingly, she pushed herself off the side of the criminally comfortable bed and found her shoes and robe. She wrinkled her nose slightly as she slid into them. They were red and gold, like almost everything else in this place, and while she had nothing against the colours themselves, their existence reminded her of what exactly had happened to the tunic she'd worn to this place. She swallowed dryly. It was probably brown now, an old bloodstain, and...

No.

Resolutely, Katara tied the sash around her waist and set her chin stubbornly. She wasn't going to think about it. She didn't need to think about it. Most importantly, she didn't _want_ to think about it, and so for as long as she could, she was going to hold it off. Reaching out, Katara grabbed her water pouch from the bedside drawers and slung it over her shoulders. Quietly, she crossed the floor, swung open the door and walked out into the corridor.

The Fire Nation palace was subdued at night, the blazing sconces every few meters only poor imitations of the shafts of sunlight that normally arced through the windows during the day. Quickly, Katara retraced her steps over the soft carpet. The palace was so large that if she hadn't made the trip twice so many times already, she would probably have gotten lost. As it was, the repeated journey from her room to the infirmary had occurred more times than she cared to admit over the last day and a half. Katara resolutely tried to ignore the sagging exhaustion in her limbs as she walked now. In the last thirty-six hours, sleep had proven shockingly evasive for both of them. She let herself smile lopsidedly. If it hadn't been for the fact that she knew the rings under her eyes were mirrored by the rings under Zuko's, she might have sought him out. As it was, her feet carried her unerringly away from the direction of his room, as if they too knew that the Fire Prince needed all the rest he could get. Besides, they'd talked for long enough the previous night... Katara's smile widened in gentle awe at the lie. There was a lot to catch up on, after an entire year as enemies.

But that could all wait. Katara stepped into the doorway of the infirmary, and let sad eyes sweep over the softly moaning bodies and the black and red flesh. And then anger replaced the sadness, guilt replaced the anger, and determination replaced the guilt. In the moonlight, Katara pulled out the stopper from her pouch and drew out her element.

And then, humming lightly under her breath, Katara got to work.

* * *

Whatever he had hoped, dreamed, or thought about the end of the war, Zuko had never imagined it to be quite like this. For one, he'd spent his first night back home talking with a waterbender. The incredulous smile that lit his face up at the thought of that little miracle faded away with the remembrance of everything else. Like the work. It had taken less than an hour after the deadly Agni Kai for everything to fall in on him, and then the day had suddenly seemed too short for facing his most important Ministers, for giving them their new orders, for preparing the drafting of a treaty, for taking stock of the Nation he was once again Prince of...

Not to mention that even now, he couldn't possibly fathom sleeping in the Fire Lord's chambers. Things were too fresh, too raw for that. For the second time, on this second night, he had felt eyes at his bank as he'd gone to his old rooms and firmly shut the door.

Now, Zuko looked around at the flickering shadows, watching the dance of light across his walls. Then again, there weren't that many good memories here either. He sat on the bed and felt it sink a little, staying there until the whisper of the trees sang louder than the inhabitants of the palace.

As if a flame had moved inside him, Zuko abruptly stood again. The door didn't creak as he opened it, his footsteps padding out into the carpeted corridor outside. The Fire Prince moved like a ghost through his home, not quite knowing where he was going. It was only when he stood outside the gaping cavern of his father's study that things began to make sense.

Zuko took a breath and pushed the door open, a flame lit in his palm. Two quick movements lit the fireplace in the corner and the lamp above the desk. He surveyed the room expressionlessly.

Ozai's desk was ordered rigidly; the scrolls stacked in boxes and the boxes on shelves. A map was spread out across the center of the floor, the lands tinted blood-like with red. Zuko winced and was about to turn away, when something strange caught his eye.

The islands that formed the Fire Nation were an old image in his mind; their picture drilled into him long ago by constant exposure. But now as Zuko moved closer, he saw little shapes dot their expanse. His eyes narrowed as he carefully crouched, ever aware of the wound still clawed into his chest, and tentatively extended his fingers to touch the figures. One moved under his skin, and he almost whipped his hand back as he realised exactly what it was.

He didn't know why it had taken him so long to recognise it. Perhaps it was the fact that he hadn't slept for over twenty-four hours, but his mind still felt relatively clear. Zuko frowned and picked up the figurine of a Fire Nation soldier, arms welded tight to his sides. Curling his fingers around it loosely, he stepped back, and with his newfound realisation he saw the map for what it was; a strategy board. The names of towns and cities clung to the geography of the land, the figures massed amongst them. His eyes wandered over to the Earth Kingdom and then sprang back to familiar territory, repelled by the sea of red that blocked out Ba Sing Se. A wave of regret stole his breath for a moment, but then he shook himself out of it. There was no more time for that. The war was over, it was likely that the city had already been liberated.

Zuko exhaled and was about to settle the Fire Nation soldier back in its place when he heard footsteps. On reflex, he quickly brought the flames from the lamp and the fireplace down to embers, casting the room into shadow. The movement jarred the wound still sitting in his flesh, and for a moment the he felt the pain trigger a flood of adrenaline through his veins, flowing fast and sweet before his mind caught up with his body. With a snort of disgust the Fire Prince released the fire and let light spring back into the study. This was what happened when you ran for too long.

The renewed brightness outlined a shape at the doorway, and despite Zuko's return to calmness, he felt his heartbeat pick up again. Whoever it was, they wore the light armour of a guard captain, and Zuko had to remind himself that he was no longer being hunted by his people.

"Who is it?" he asked, his voice rasping slightly in the night.

The figure paused, and then took off his helmet to reveal clear amber eyes. With a quiet confidence, the guard captain crossed the threshold, and Zuko saw his features emerging from the dimness of the corridor. and crossed the threshold. He was a young man, perhaps not much older than Zuko himself, but other than that there seemed to be nothing distinctive about him. He had the kind of nondescript face that could blend anywhere if one didn't look too closely, and for some reason that made Zuko instantly distrust him.

"My name is Shen Li, your highness."

Zuko's eyelids didn't flicker. "Why are you here?"

A slight, wry smile crossed the other's face. It deepened the angles in his features, and Zuko was struck by how familiar he looked. He frowned, trying to place the man's ancestry, but couldn't quite do it.

"A messenger from General Iroh arrived just minutes ago. Here."

The guard captain extended a scroll, and with a sudden rush of eagerness Zuko nearly snatched it out of his grasp. Remembering to mumble a thank-you, Zuko turned quickly to the desk without thinking and tugged the ribbon loose, As such, Zuko completely missed Shen Li's smile settle down into an almost imperceptible frown, and the sight of the soldier's hand reaching into his bag and pulling out another document. As Zuko let the paper roll down to reveal his uncle's familiar rounded characters, the guard captain considered the second roll of paper in his hand for a moment, before placing it down on the drawers beside the massive desk. Then he bowed, straightened, and departed silently.

Zuko noticed none of this; the mere sight of Iroh's handwriting was enough to lessen the ripple of worry that had curled around his chest. His uncle was alive, and that meant everything was okay. With a sigh of relief, Zuko turned to the letter itself, reading it with hungry eyes. The ink seemed to smile at him as he went, their strokes elegant and sure, and for a second the familiarity of them almost hurt.

_To Zuko,_

_I trust that this letter will reach you as the Fire Lord, or at least the Fire Lord-to-be. With that in mind, I am writing to let you know that you have officially lost Ba Sing Se and it has been returned to the Earth Kingdom. _

Zuko paused to let a rare smile wreathe his face from side to side, hearing an echo of his Uncle's hearty chuckle behind the words. He'd known that Iroh could do it. It was just another victory to toast in the days to come...

But then, as quickly as it had spread through his heart, Zuko's elation suddenly vanished. In his mind, he still hadn't quite settled what 'the days to come' would look like. He was Fire Lord now... well, he would be soon. And that would mean reigning over a torn and divided nation, most of whom knew him only as the dishonoured, traitor prince.

With the ugly image of the blood-coloured world stark in his mind, Zuko shivered and kept reading.

_Of course, I'm sure you have more things on your mind than me removing a sizable portion of your lands. I do hope you are settling well, Nephew. Well enough that you have to time to attend to what I ask of you soon. Whatever state you find the Fire Nation in now, the aftermath of war will only make things worse. So allow a humble old man to make his recommendations. Seek out your Minster for Security and speak with his son. I met with the boy a few times, long ago, and I believe he will make an excellent Chief Bodyguard and advisor for you in the days to come._

Zuko's breath suddenly stilled. Pausing, he reread the last few sentences carefully, the years spent with his Uncle paying off well. For between the stately lines, Zuko knew exactly what Iroh was trying to tell him. To be careful in his new position, to trust none of his Father's Ministers, advisors and servants until he was completely certain of where their loyalties lay.

_Now don't look at me that way, Nephew. I know you can look after yourself, you've shown that. But I'm sure that Shen Li will prove invaluable in his own way._

At that, Zuko's eyebrows shot higher than the sky. Shen Li was not that uncommon a combination, he wouldn't be surprised if there were at least a hundred of them scattered around in the Fire Nation. But through some strange synchronicity, he somehow knew exactly which one his Uncle was talking about. With a sigh, he turned around, ready to address the man he'd briefly forgotten the existence of, only to be met with thin air.

Zuko blinked, and then swore under his breath. He hadn't even noticed the guard captain leave. For a moment he was unsettled, but then with a struggle, he managed to push his paranoia back. If Uncle vouched for him, he was sure to be all right. He turned back to the last few lines of the letter with a newfound uncertainty resting in his gaze.

_Be well, Nephew. I've packaged two sachets of tea for any headaches you might encounter in the near future. I'll bring more when I visit._

_Iroh._

Zuko stared at his Uncle's name for a moment, and then let the paper fall to the desk. Sinking back into his chair, careful not to aggravate his wound, Zuko exhaled slowly. Then, with a sigh moving through his frame, he made a mental note to himself that he'd call for the guard captain in the morning.

As if repeating the habits of the night, Zuko sat in the chair for a very long while before he moved, his eyes never leaving the shape of the Fire Nation fixed into the map on the floor. When Zuko finally left the study, he extinguished the flames with a twist of his hands. The door closed behind him as he faced forwards into the corridor, and the Fire Prince walked away without ever noticing the second scroll left abandoned near his father's desk, the smooth surface swallowing up the last of the firelight.

* * *

Katara paused briefly, feeling exhaustion weigh down her limbs. It seemed like ages had passed since she'd caught a quick nap on Appa's back. Perhaps even eons. She brushed her arm tiredly against her forehead. So much had changed...

Katara pulled herself straight, set her shoulders, and got back to work. The child under her hands shifted slightly in her sleep as the water passed over her once more, pale features youthful and innocent past the burns. Katara winced as she worked her water into them, felt the stinging and heard the soft cry as the Fire Nation girl shifted in her sleep.

At the movement, Katara looked down at her, looked down at her closely. And then watched as her world turned upside down again. Things really had changed. _Everything_. Her mind drifted from her last rest on Appa to the first time she'd ever climbed on, and she bit her lip to stifle back a laugh... or a sob, she wasn't quite sure which. Whatever it was, it was something that tasted like awe as she swallowed it down again, because the transformation seemed incomprehensible. Try as she might, she couldn't remember what it was like to have been the innocent girl dutifully doing her chores, taking care of everyone and dreaming of waves of water. Katara looked down. The red burn that she'd been healing had faded to whole flesh again, and she smiled, resting her water-gloved hand briefly on the child's cheek before moving on.

He was asleep, like most of them were, and Katara wondered briefly if the doctors had put something into their food. But then the thought vanished as she pulled back the sheets. This time, she bit her lip back to stifle a cry - the damage that had been done was dreadful. As her eyes rounded the charred flesh across his shoulders and creeping down across his chest, she wondered at how he could still be alive. And then she cursed herself, because she thought that she'd seen most of the terribly wounded ones already, thought that she and the Fire Nation doctors had had a system...

The sapphire glow from her hands lit up his craggy features briefly before settling back. Katara studied his face, hopelessly drawn to his humanity. He looked older than he should have, a boy forced into being a man, and Katara closed her eyes. If only she could save him...

...

_Katara stared at the left stands, completely and utterly in shock. The people who had been there before had been whole, pink, living. At the point of impact, they were simply gone, black ashes on the ground. The lucky ones clutched horrific burns to the side, the physicians had long been swamped, and Katara readied her stream of water to propel her to their sides, to heal some of the damage..._

"_NO!"_

_Katara turned, just in time to feel electricity spark its reflection in her irises, and Zuko crumple to the ground. Her eyes widened and her mouth formed its own scream. This could not be happening, this couldn't... "ZUKO!" _

... _and then she felt the image of his body imprint itself across her eyes, saw him filled with unnatural light, saw him shine as he crumpled to the ground with a low cry of pain. And then she was running, she was dodging, she was fighting. Not for good, not for vengeance, but for hope. The hope that if she could get to her friend in time, she might be able to save him..._

"_Why Zu-Zu, you don't look so good!"_

_Katara clenched her jaw. She only had a few miniscule drops of water left in her hand, and Azula was preparing another blow that this time she couldn't avoid. Desperately, she breathed in and out, feeling the water around her, curling between her fingers, running through the aqueducts, running through their veins..._

_Katara's eyes snapped wide. _Congratulations, Katara, you're a bloodbender. _She drew herself tall and then breathed again, bringing her hands up slowly and crashing them down. There was a shudder, and then suddenly the red-and-gold plated figure on the roof trembled to her knees._

_Azula spat fire as she sank, feeling her very blood weigh her to the ground. Her eyes fixed on the waterbender moving in her forms. What is that peasant doing to me?! She snarled and pushed back, drawing on the power of the comet to repel the foreign force. But it was too late. Her walls of fire had broken, and Katara rushed to the aqueducts, all the water in her hands gone and of no use to anyone, let alone Zuko. _

_She had barely reached the grill when a flying spray of flame greeted her. Dodging aside, Katara swept up a full wave to drench the other girl. Fire and water met and evaporated into the air, equal strength matched by equal strength. Azula screamed again and ran towards her, weaving through Katara's hastily formed octopus arms to strike at the girl within. Despite her predicament, Katara couldn't help but shoot a glance at the fallen boy in the arena. He was on his stomach, his fingers grasping shakily at the air, and she knew she was running out of time..._

_Katara's mouth thinned. She brought her arms up sharply, and before Azula knew it she was spinning in a massive wave, a wave which was carrying them both towards her brother. Gathering her mind, the Fire Princess twisted sharply, severing the water and sending them both crashing to the ground. Katara caught herself, barely, skating on curves of ice raised up from the remnants of her wave, and Azula followed with her fire. Katara's heart dropped to her stomach. She could feel her hard-won water hiss into steam behind her even as she neared Zuko, and dammit, she was going to be too late, too late..._

_..._

In the far reaches of her mind, the parts of her that weren't concentrating on directing her element to seep through the pain and bring life back to dead skin, Katara felt herself sway. The movement snapped open her vision, and it took her a moment to focus before she could see.

His face had smoothed, taking away the lines that had given him so many extra years. The agony in his breath had receded, leaving him in living sleep rather than near-death. In the stillness broken only by the soft shifting of the hospital's other occupants, Katara stared down at the lightly reddened flesh before her, feeling more exhausted than she'd ever had in her life.

_Magic, _they'd whispered when she first came. And then the whispers grew louder, became words she could hear. And she had to admit she was shocked that _Witch _followed afterwards, even when she was trying her hardest to save their lives. But then the doctors had swept in, trained professionals who had steel-soft voices, whose organisation and control had replaced the mutterings. And much, much later, when she was passing her water over a small child instead of an already haggard and prejudiced adult, she was called _Angel._

Katara sighed and moved her water to the boy's torso. What she'd give to be called...

"I thought I'd find you here."

The voice was low, from just behind her shoulder, and Katara jumped. Her water splattered to the floor as she spun around, soaking the hem of her robe. "Zuko! Don't... sneak up on me like that!"

Zuko half-smiled, cloaked in tiredness and distance. "Sorry," he said, and then his smile grew fully when she hmmphed at him and turned away, summoning up her water again. And so they stayed like that for a while, she working quietly, he lost in his thoughts and yet oddly comforted by the knowledge that his people were in such good hands. Around them, the silence settled on them reassuringly, full of words that didn't need to be said. But then, finally, when she'd moved on to the next one (because there was always a next one), Katara spoke.

"So, you couldn't sleep either?"

Zuko chuckled. "How'd you guess?" he asked dryly, twisting to face her out of habit. Nothing happened for all of a second, and then Zuko gasped as a strike of pain shot across his chest. Katara was there before he knew it, bringing her hands up to loosen his robes. "You idiot," she scolded, her voice thick with worry. "I told you that you weren't healed yet!"

Zuko grimaced but said nothing, letting her pull up his undershirt and trying to push away the pain. Before him, Katara bit her tongue lightly as she unwound the darkening bandages. When the swollen skin was finally revealed, torn open and dribbling blood from his sudden movement, Katara hissed in sympathy as she summoned her water through the air. The wound had reached deeply, so deeply... it was as if Azula's lightning had clawed its fingers inside him before shattering the sky. Silently, Katara thanked La that she had made it in time. Because if she hadn't...

Katara swallowed, and concentrated once more. She didn't have to think about that now. What was important was that she had. Even if there had been a price...

...

_From behind her, Azula reached forwards and shattered the last of her ice. There was a breath, and then Katara cried out as she tumbled onto the ground, her reaching hands clawing at the air as she landed meters from her target. The Fire Princess flipped off her stream of fire, laughing jerkily again as she approached them both. _

"_No more running, filthy peasant," she snarled. Her voice carried to the crowd, cut through them like a sword. There was only a puddle of water left of the wave that Katara had carried, and Azula could almost smell victory in the air. The waterbender swayed, and Azula ignored the own shakiness in her knees to look into the peasant's face and see herself reflected in ice-blue eyes. The girl was fourteen as well, she remembered. Tendrils of her brown hair were escaping from her plait, and in her widened eyes, Azula thought she saw fear._

_She smiled, insanity colouring her eyes and whiting out her teeth. It was time to end this._

_Azula didn't notice as Katara's own eyes narrowed. She was moving so fast she couldn't see the girl's fingers dip down to gather the little water she had left. Nothing mattered, besides the fact that nothing the pathetic little peasant could possibly conjure up would stop the bolt of flame that was headed for her throat, and... _

_It took over a second for her to feel it._

_First there was pain, a terrible pain that flooded from a single concentrated point in her chest, in exactly the same place she'd hit Zuko. Azula's eyes opened so wide they took in the sun. And then she was flooded with cold... it was so cold, and Azula crumpled to her knees in shock. She felt the ice dagger slide out of her, leaving a fiery path in its wake. Shakingly, uncomprehendingly, she stared down at the bloody hole within her, and then, seemingly in slow motion, the Azula, daughter of Phoenix King Ozai and one of the greatest firebenders to have ever lived, fell._

_It took a moment, but then Katara fell with her, the hand not holding the dagger automatically cradling around her fallen opponent's side. I will never turn my back on the people who need me. As she knelt down, Azula's head fell back and rested on the ground. The movement brought them closer, and as the entire crowd stilled, pools of anguished blue met wide-open circles of gold._

"_I'm so, so sorry," Katara whispered._

_It was a pointless, useless apology. They both knew it, but for some reason the cold in her chest and the waterbender's eyes cleared the madness in her head. The last vestiges of Azula's mind rushed up into lucidity with a gasp, and with her blood leaking out of her body, she managed to register something._

_The waterbender was not afraid._

_What was her name? Katara... that's what her brother had said. Azula tried to shape the syllables with her mouth, but as she moved she felt the terrible, sharp-lit pain twist in her torso. The name turned into a weak cry, and that was when the blue eyes crushed and the girl's grip became tighter, almost an embrace._

_In the distilled clarity of her mind, Azula recognised what drove the strength of the water peasant's arms. There was no fear... and so the shining in her eyes had to be something else, something different, something miraculous._

_With her sanity, Azula latched on to that light and used it to fuel her last words. They came out hoarsely, slowly, like a baby rabbit-mouse taking its first steps, and Katara had to crane her head down to hear them._

"_Am I a monster?"_

_Azula watched as the waterbender's gaze widened, and what was left of her heart fell back into her chest. She could almost see the memories running across the other's face; see herself poised with fire, arms always reaching out to attack the ones the girl loved. She could even see the moment Katara remembered Ba Sing Se, when her mouth compressed slightly and the pool of her eyes grew darker. At that moment, Azula wanted to die. But then, what had she expected? She had frightened her own mother, made an enemy out of her brother, left herself all alone..._

_Azula coughed, and drew in a shuddering, bloody breath. Her vision was hazing now, her ability to see swimming out of her grasp. So be it. She would die held by a water peasant, and truly, truly alone..._

"_No."_

_Azula's drooping eyelids snapped open. The waterbender was staring down at her, her eyes fierce and determined. "No, you're not a monster, Azula. You never were."_

_The thought rang in her cleared mind like a bell. Thank you. But she never said it, because even if she could have, they both knew that saying thank you after all this time would have been as useless as the waterbender's apology. And so with the last tendrils of her strength, Azula focused on Katara's eyes, and the care that she found in them._

_Slowly, Azula felt herself sink into a realm of white. The cold and pain vanished, replaced by a strange tingling that didn't extend itself to her body. A sudden sense of soaring caught her spirit, and then she was flying into the sun and the fire that she loved, leaving the cage of her hatred behind._

_And so Azula died, the faintest trace of a long-forgotten smile on her lips._

...

."... Katara? Katara?"

Katara snapped back to attention, her eyes instantly focusing on the worried face in front of her. He was all right. He was alive, and so was she. Katara swallowed, and then her water-gloved hand dropped to her side, leaving Zuko's healing skin cooling against the air. He pulled his shift back down as she let out a hissing breath through her teeth. "Sorry," she apologised, averting her gaze. "I guess I just got a little distracted."

She was surprised when he placed a hand on her shoulder, so surprised that her head jerked back up to meet his eyes at the touch. Zuko had never struck her as a particularly tactile person... but his fingers were warm as he held her gently, and her shock slowly faded away to be replaced by a quiet acknowledgement of his proffered comfort. But her look must have conveyed her earlier surprise, because Zuko's hand was awkward as it fell back to his side.

"You don't have to do this to yourself," he finally said, his golden eyes warm and sincere. "You did what you had to. We all did."

Katara didn't question how he knew, she just looked away. "She was your sister," she whispered.

Katara felt his eyes hold her in their gaze, studying her for a long time before they finally shifted away to the window. "Yeah," he said quietly. "She was."

It was simple, but the finality of it brushed cold fingers against her spine. Katara bit her lip again and turned to face the same window. The quiet lights of the Fire Nation capitol lay spread out before them, a sea of dancing fire that eventually spread out into the darkness of the restless sea. The foreign beauty of the moment startled her, and Katara felt something slow and uncertain curl up in her belly in response.

Yes. There had been change. _She_ had changed.

... and so had he.

Katara felt something approaching a smile cross her face as she glanced at the boy beside her. Thirty-six hours ago, he had been the strongest she'd ever seen him. And there had been none of the rage and hatred that had coiled up inside her as she'd watched, only fear and an odd belief as he'd danced, splitting Azula's hydras of flame with his own blades of fire. And then her sight had been shattered by lightning.

For some reason, Katara suddenly felt old as she stood with Zuko looking out to the ocean. It really had only been one year. But then, after so many months of loathing, here they were. Victors. Allies. Friends.

"You know, I meant what I said last night," Katara said abruptly, suddenly. Zuko began to turn to her, startled, but subsided at the remembered twinges in his chest.

"You said a lot of things last night," he said carefully, his lips stretched into a painful grin. "From telling me you'd never forgive Yon Rha to how much more you liked mangoes to papaya."

There was a moment where her eyebrows arched into seriousness, and then it fled as she laughed. "Good point," she chuckled. "I'd kind of forgotten about that. Well, I meant the important thing."

His grin lost its strain at her guilelessness."I'm afraid that still doesn't narrow it down, Katara. I don't suppose I could get any specifics?"

Katara rolled her eyes, but sobered as she studied him. "When we were talking about the future," she said softly. "When we were talking about your future. I meant what I said when I told you that you'd make a good Fire Lord."

With that, the corners of his mouth lifted enough to make it a proper, genuine smile. "I know," he said quietly. "Thank you."

She nodded in acknowledgement and turned back to the view. He turned back with her, the words hesitant in his throat. "Thank you," he said again, staring out to the sea. "It... it means a lot, coming from you."

"Me?" Katara arched her eyebrow wryly, smoothing the skin of her hands. "I thought I was just a little peasant?"

Zuko winced as his remembered words echoed back at him. "You know you're more than that," he shook his head. "Don't be ridiculous."

The eyebrow subsided. "I don't really know what I am, really," she admitted quietly, and somewhere inside her, a restless coil of feeling shifted in agreement. Yet as soon as the words escaped her, she regretted them. They made it real, made her weak, and she was about to open her mouth to take them back when he spoke first.

"What are you going to do, after this?"

She stopped. "Huh?"

Zuko didn't look at her, he just gestured vaguely out to the sea. "What are you going to do now, now it's all over? I mean... it's just that I guess that's what's always defined me." He looked down at his feet, his voice rough in his throat. "My future."

She was silent as she gazed at him, clear blue eyes lost in thought, and he swallowed before hurriedly continuing. "So... so maybe if you figure yours out, you might get an idea?"

The future? Katara nodded thoughtfully, before suddenly freezing in place. A future. She had a future beyond the comet, beyond the painstaking, heartwrenching destiny that had been mapped out for Aang and beyond the war that had shaped her life. A future that suddenly reached out in front of her, far more expansive and frightening than she'd ever imagined.

It was logical, she thought, to want to go back to the South Pole, to her family. To wake up in the morning to furs and chores, to eat Gran-Gran's stewed sea prunes with Sokka, to see her Father walk in at the head of a hunting group...

For a moment, that crystallised image hung in her mind like a dream, and then she watched it dissolve away into the ether. Slowly, without even realising it, Katara hung her head. It wouldn't be like that. It couldn't be. It would be infinitely more complex, infinitely more simple, and more importantly, infinitely different from her memories. The village would look smaller. It would _feel_ smaller. Suki would be there, or perhaps Sokka would choose to live in the Earth Kingdom. And even though Katara loved her family, loved her village, loved the South Pole, she suddenly couldn't think of simply returning there for the rest of her life... of just growing old, marrying, and dying on the ice floe. She wanted something more, something greater than just a return to chores and washing the warrior's clothes and cooking with Gran-Gran. She had seen the world, she had fought and bled for it, and now she wanted to see what it could be like in peace.

Besides, there was so much more left to do. She wasn't sure if she was ready to simply leave and go back. She wasn't sure if, even if she wanted to, she could. Sokka wasn't just a boy with a boomerang, now, and she certainly wasn't a little girl with a few water-bending tricks up her sleeve. She was a Master Waterbender, the Avatar's Waterbender, and...

_And what would Aang think when he found out about Azula?_

The sudden roil of uncertainty reached up from her belly and reached her throat. "I don't know," she said blankly. "I just don't know." She shifted back away from the window, from its vast promise and to Zuko. Something in her face struck him, and even though he was as uncertain as before, this time his hand stayed on her shoulder when he reached out.

"It's okay," he said softly, reassuringly, lopsidedly. "I guess the most important thing right now is that we _have_ a future."

Despite the words, there was something of a shadow in his tone, and Katara unconsciously drew herself back at the implications. They had heard from the swiftest messenger hawks earlier that day that Aang had defeated Ozai bloodlessly, had heard that the Earth Kingdom still stood and that Zuko could prepare to declare the war officially over. But here...

Here there had been blood. Spilt by her hands. And any future would be built on it.

"Yeah," she finally said, slowly. "We have a future."

_... I wonder what it will be like._

* * *

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A/N II: Wow! Another one up so soon... I guess that just shows how obsessed I am with the idea of this fic now. However, in the future, I can't promise such speedy updates... but I will dedicate myself to at least one new chapter a week! Things might change as Uni gets more hectic, but we'll see

Anyway, I hope that you're all enjoying this as much as I am. :) Please drop me a line. Reviews make me happy (and make me write faster!).


	3. Reflections

**Chapter Three: Reflections**

Disclaimer: Mike and Bryan, the show's creators, own Avatar: The Last Airbender, completely. I'm only showing my love of their world by playing in it.

A/N I: Not much to say this time... I've made a few tweaks to this from the original chapter I posted of the same title, but not too many! So I hope you enjoy!

* * *

_Look into the water,_

_Look into yourself,_

_The ripples fast are fading,_

_Yet still you do not see._

_Ask your many questions,_

_And hear them echo back,_

_Then splash your own reflections,_

_They answer what you lack._

* * *

Unsurprisingly, the main reason that Mai hadn't enjoyed prison was because it was boring. Period. Between the short spasms of time that the prisoners were allowed out to exercise, there was only the company of her cell and herself, and nothing could be quite so bad as that.

Because Mai had too much to think about.

Not only that, the environment didn't particularly give her much to distract herself with. The walls were cold and dry, the door locked and useless to her. She warmed herself up sometimes by moving through her forms, but then she would invariably stop, depressed at the uselessness of reaching for darts that weren't there.

So mostly she sat and stared at the floor.

Mai was no stranger to hardship. She'd known the bite of hunger as they'd travelled across the Earth Kingdom at Azula's furious pace. She'd known cold, and she'd known some pain in their fights. To tell the truth, she was certainly no stranger to loneliness and boredom; she'd known both for long enough in the company of her parents. But she was completely and utterly new at _this_. The experience of being someone but no-one. Of being stripped of her clothes of rank and title, given shapeless red cloth instead. The only function her prison rags served was to hide her body, and it was so different to her robes that had hidden her weapons and proclaimed her as a lady, as someone important, all at once.

It was so different, and Mai was so shocked at the alien nature of it that she had not even known how to respond when she'd been asked her name.

It had been at 'exercise' time - the few hours of the day where they were taken out of the solitude of their cells and thrown into groups to breathe fresh air again. Usually, Mai never talked at these except to Ty Lee, but on this occasion Ty Lee hadn't been part of the group allocated to this area. And so she'd stayed back in the shadows, inhaling and exhaling, waiting to be taken back to her cell.

"Hi, I'm Seni," someone had said. "One of the Kyoshi Warriors."

She'd jerked her head up sharply, surprised that anyone had noticed her. When she finally responded, her voice was drier than normal from disuse. "I'm Mai," she said. "I'm..."

She stopped and paused. Who was she? Who was she _now_? She knew what she _had_ been. For far too long she'd simply been the Governor's Daughter. Then the Fire Princess' friend. Then Azula's puppet. Then the Fire Prince's Girlfriend... _Zuko._ Mai's long, graceful, exact fingers clenched, No, she certainly wasn't the Fire Prince's Girlfriend any more. Zuko himself had seen to that.

So who was she?

"I'm a prisoner," she said, and the other girl looked at her oddly.

"I can see that. So are we all."

Of course she wouldn't have understood. Mai just shrugged and said nothing, bowing her head back down. It had been a few days since she'd been able to wash her hair, and the lanky strands disgusted her. But they were proving rather effective at shielding her eyes, so she supposed she couldn't complain.

This time, however, it didn't seem to do much.

"Hang on," Seni said abruptly. "I recognise you. You were with the girl who captured us! You're..."

Mai didn't wait for the Kyoshi warrior to finish speaking. After all, Seni was a person who knew who she was, so she obviously didn't have anything of use to say. "Not anymore," Mai cut her off abruptly. Then she walked away, and murmured something under her breath so quietly that she knew that other girl couldn't possibly hear her.

"Whatever you're going to say, I'm not that anymore."

Around her, haggard people in haggard clothing gathered in the yard. Mai swept past all of them without a second blink. They might all be prisoners, but none of them were imprisoned quite like her.

* * *

Without Appa, it took the wounded Sokka, Suki, Toph and Aang a day and a half to reach the Fire Nation on one of the reserve war balloons. What with the time difference and their much-needed rest after the battle, it was already late afternoon when word of their approach finally came. And so it was that Zuko and Katara stepped out into the cool, tangy air of a Fire Nation afternoon to greet their returning friends.

The path was short, and crowded with people unsure of what to expect. Amidst them, Zuko walked heavily, the robes of a reinstated Fire Prince swathing his shoulders. It felt good to feel their weight, but even better to feel their weight and walk at the same time. It made it different from the last occasion he'd been shrugged into these clothes, when a royal palanquin had been his feet. Compared to the bulkiness of the litter he felt light, airy even, as he strode down to the docking station, where Appa was already waiting, to meet them.

Katara moved quickly at his side, her face shining around her bruised eyes. He took another look at them and exhaled quietly. She didn't know it, but she'd become the living symbol of what they'd accomplished in the last forty-eight hours. It seemed that every time things became surreal, every time he needed peace before he tore up the throne room, his feet would instinctively excuse themselves and take him down to the infirmary. And then he'd find her, the figure of his friend bent over the beds of the grievously injured or the pallets on the floor for the less severely burned and the sick. Sometimes, he'd even had to push part the onlookers to find her, the small blue form amidst all the red, humming softly to herself as she'd pushed and pulled the pain away from her patients. His people.

Zuko smiled again at the memory, and at his own moments of healing. Bandages still wove around his torso under the heavy cloth of his robe, but now at least the injury they hid didn't spasm with pain every time he turned. "They love you now, you know," he said suddenly, his mouth moving before his mind.

She stumbled in surprise, and he had to wave away an overzealous member of the guard escorting them. Within seconds, she'd regained both footing and composure, looking up at him with a quizzical expression in her eyes. "Excuse me?"

He gestured expansively, the sweep of his arm taking in the marketplace, the museum, the people that rushed and bustled past. "You've been healing our injured almost non-stop since we've finished here. If I'd known it was so easy to sway public opinion, I would have tried something like that a long time ago."

_If only you knew, _Katara shook her head slightly and kept walking, braid bouncing as she increased her stride. "And what would you have done, oh Fire Lord?" she grinned, her eyes teasing. "Splash water over them and pretend you were a peasant?"

The guard directly behind them stifled a laugh, but before Zuko could say anything another of their escort stepped forwards.

"It's not just that, my lady," he said, his eyes hidden behind the visor of his helmet. "You and Prince Zuko took away the Fire Princess. The people who were there will not forget."

There was a sudden, dead silence around the royal entourage. Zuko felt his mouth wanting to open and close, but nothing came out. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Katara go white beneath her dark skin, and he was suddenly unreasonably angry.

"Shen Li? "

The guard captain took off his helmet, and Zuko breathed. He'd been right. He wasn't sure why he was so surprised at that - the young man had been by his side for much of the last day. He was still uncomfortable around him, however. It hadn't helped, the way they had met once more.

"Tell me, do you know any reason why my Uncle would recommend you to me?" Zuko had said in the privacy of the great throne room, the crackle of the dancing flames shielding his words from unfriendly ears.

The golden fire had reflected in Shen Li's impassive eyes. "Your uncle befriended me as a boy. I am in his debt."

Zuko's gaze hadn't wavered. "But you're not in mine."

Shen Li had looked right back. "I could be."

Even now, the ambiguity of those words rang in his ears and gave him a headache. Zuko exhaled through his nose. The guard captain raised an eyebrow in question, and the Fire Prince resisted the sudden urge to add fire to his breath.

"Don't... mention my sister in front of Katara again. Is that clear?"

Shen Li met his gaze wordlessly, then nodded before moving to replace his helmet. "Yes, your highness."

Zuko turned back, not feeling better in the slightest, and felt Katara's hand hover uncertainly at his elbow. "Zuko, it's all right," she said quietly, her eyes to the ground. "I'm going to have to deal with it eventually."

It was the way she looked away from him, the way that she kept looking away from him that made him clench his fists in frustration. It wasn't fair. "Katara, you don't have to do this to yourself," it was like being up against a solid wall of ice. "You did what you had to. We all did."

She didn't respond, just refocusing on the road ahead of them and the tenseness of the surrounding crowd. "We're here."

And then there was no time to press it, because Appa lifted up two of his feet in front of them and bellowed out to the sky. A stream of wind rushed forth, catching the belly of the balloon as it descended, and all thoughts of Azula were lost as they caught sight of their friends. With an excited cry, Katara flung her arms outwards, and within seconds Zuko was standing stiffly by, ever aware of his new office and his people around him, as the rest of them tangled in a group hug.

It was Toph, funnily enough, who realised who was missing. "Hey Sparky!" she yelled. "Get over here! We just won a war, and all you want to do is stand there?"

Katara laughed, and soon everyone else joined her as the suddenly sheepish Fire Prince joined the circle. Instantly, he was caught up in the tight embrace of arms and legs, and Katara felt the warmth that had been building up in her heart spill out to her fingers. They were there. They were all there, alive, and this was how it was meant to be.

And then she saw Sokka's bandage.

"Sokka!" she cried, and her brother looked at her blankly before he followed the direction of her eyes to his leg, and then smiled sheepishly.

"Uh, yeah, about that..."

But his sister was already unravelling the bandages. Slowly, the group hug dispersed into a circle as Sokka leaned uncomfortably on Suki's shoulder, watching as Katara disposed of the soiled linen, and then exposing the broken bone beneath.

Katara blew air between her pursed lips as she gently prodded the flesh, flinching back a little when Sokka uttered a sharp howl in reprimand. "Sorry," she apologised, smiling at Sokka's grunt in response. Her hand moved down to her water flask, and she swirled a stream of liquid out to press it against her brother's leg. It shimmered for a moment, and she concentrated on letting the tendrils reach down through the skin, seep in through the muscle, and play around the expertly-set bone before sending it back into its container.

"I'm glad you got it set," she said, looking up. Her relief-filled eyes told Sokka all he needed to know - that the Fire Nation physician hadn't been lying, that he'd be able to walk again. He exhaled slowly as someone handed her a new bandage and a proper piece of wood to replace the stick that had held his bones immobile before. A few minutes later, he was feeling better than he had since the damn thing had first broken, and as Katara stood up, smiling, they finally heard one of the guards clear his throat behind them.

Katara turned. It was Shen Li again, his face tilted downwards so as it might not seem out of place. "Your highness? Perhaps the Avatar and his companions would like to be attended to after their travels?"

Katara picked up the suddenly annoyed glint in Zuko's eyes as he remembered his contingent of guards, and she had to stifle a smile behind her fingers.

"Of... of course," the Fire Prince stuttered, and then looked back. "Well? I suppose you might want to bathe. And then... then maybe I can take you around the Palace?" At their looks, he pulled a face. "It looks different when you're not trying to invade it. Trust me."

"Okay, I'm up for that," Aang ventured, grinning, and then the rest of them followed suit. At their nods, Zuko felt something that had been seized up within him relax a little. It was over. It was really over and...

He turned around and found himself face-to-face with his people.

He hadn't really noticed their numbers before; most of them had been going about with their own business, the news of the Avatar's arrival too recent to have spread too far. But now as they realised just who had landed, they seemed to mass in front of the elevated balloon docks uncertainly, numbers poised as if unsure whether to stay or to flee. And Zuko saw the fear, the apprehension on the faces, and swallowed at the sudden dryness in his throat.

For one hundred years now, they had been taught that the Avatar was a threat. An uncontainable barrier to Fire Nation greatness. A myth to look out for, to ward against, to seek. And now the war was over, a war they'd been winning, a war that had certainly _seemed_ to be mostly popular, and it had been ended mainly by the airbender's actions.

Aang's broad grin wavered as he too suddenly noticed the crowd, before vanishing completely when his friend suddenly grabbed his hand and dragged him out to the front. The indignant protest, "Hey, Zuko!", was already on his lips, before it died away the moment he realised exactly how the elevated docks were now doubling as a stage.

And how he was now standing in front of hundreds of Fire Nation people, who suddenly seemed more frightening than Ozai himself.

Aang gulped. "Zuko?"

The scarred prince said nothing, still and rigid as his hand curled tightly around his friend's hand. And then he was moving, jerking his arm upwards and throwing interlinked pale and tattooed fingers into the air.

"The Avatar!" he cried out, and Katara could see the ripples of his voice where it struck his people, hear the echoes as it rung across stone and metal. And then it was as if Toph had invaded her body, because she swore she could feel the collective heartbeat of the Fire Nation pause, slow, and then quicken into a replying roar.

The sound was astounding. It reverberated across them, rolling with displaced air that brushed their faces as it passed. It was not a roar of approval; it was far too new, too raw for that, and the fears were still to ingrained. Yet those closest could see the balance in the slight child's gray eyes, could see the unearthly way he held himself, the utter composure and strength in his shoulders. And most importantly, they could see that there was no danger in the set of his lips, and so their collective minds began to remember even older stories, even older myths, and those vaguely recollected shreds was enough to give him their respect.

And they felt it. Six children on the wooden docks, who had just stopped an impossible war brought on by the follies of Lords. _Katara_ felt it; a force deep inside her which had seen the effect of Zuko's words, and despite it all she smiled.

There was hope.

And it was only a pity, a real pity that none of them felt or saw the smaller groups like the ones who spat on the ground, or the ones shouting curses instead of wary acknowledgement. Still, even they were noticed by some of the guards, Shen Li and Zuko in particular noting them down in their minds, eyes narrowing at the implications.

But even they missed the others, the ones who arguably mattered more. There weren't that many of them amidst the rest of their countrymen, and they were alike enough that they were easy to miss. Still, when they retreated into the shadows cast by the midday sun, they left holes that remained long after the crowd itself had dispersed.

* * *

Perhaps it was because they were hungry, but dinner that night was incredible. True to his word, Zuko had suspended his royal affairs and taken them around the palace. It was a tired and yet content group that trooped back into the royal dining hall, and one soon convulsed in laughter when upon seeing the feast spread out in front of them, Sokka's eyes widened until they looked as if they were about to pop out of his head.

Still, it wasn't all perfect. Katara bit her lip as she picked up her chopsticks again, well aware that Aang had been staring at her with that inscrutable expression on his face, before lowering his gaze for the hundredth time that day. The lemon duck-chicken suddenly tasted a little more sour in her mouth than it needed to be. Surprisingly enough, given the Gaang's closeness for the past few hours, she and Aang hadn't really talked much yet. Sure, there had been the congratulations, the hug, the praising of his final decision to take away Ozai's firebending instead of ending it _and hadn't that just dug the guilt in a little bit more?... _but despite Aang's thoughtful looks, he hadn't properly approached her, and she hadn't questioned that.

Katara somehow managed to worry her lip while she ate, turning her thoughts over in her mind. Perhaps it was because they'd invariably been interrupted by Zuko asking Aang his opinion on various matters of the peace summit (to be held as soon as things in the Earth Kingdom settled down), or by one of Toph or Sokka's snarky comments. But still, it was strange. It was almost as if he was deliberately holding himself back.

Not that she could really complain, however. Somewhere deep inside her, Katara knew that she was actively avoiding Aang, and it was more than just Azula staying her hand. Besides the fact that she wasn't sure how to deal with this new Aang, she still didn't feel like she had a response to the old; to his kisses, his questions... and that made her feel worse than ever.

Was she still confused? Hell yes. Even the war ending hadn't stopped that, although mind you... she still wasn't so sure it had happened. It seemed so overwhelming, sitting here in this golden hall, the table still spread with food. Katara took another bite, and her appetite returned. But even as she ate, picking up another few pieces of lemon duck-chicken and roasted cow-pig, her eyes never stopped roving around the faces of her friends, drinking in their wholeness and joy. How far they'd come from foraging for nuts and rocks in the forest.

Katara suddenly wished they could stay like this forever. Just the six of them, Momo perched on Aang's shoulder and Appa being well tended to outside. Sokka and Suki were feeding each other tidbits, laughing and talking animatedly with Toph, who was digging in herself with gusto. Zuko and Aang were talking quietly, the lulls in their conversation punctuated by Aang's sidelong glances at her. Aside from the last fact, Katara was comfortable. They were safe, it was finished, and she didn't have to worry anymore.

Of course, like all good things, dinner did indeed finish, and by the time it did, Katara was half-glad it had. She was sure that after dinner, her stomach wouldn't have been able to fit anything else in, but then there was dessert, and she found that she'd been wrong, and the deliciously refreshing sorbets and selections of Fire Nation fruits were eaten with gusto. But when the plates were all being packed up and they'd retired to one of the side rooms where they could just 'hang out', as Toph had said, the solace of the present was soon over.

Sokka sat in one of the chairs, his arm draped around Suki, and the implicit reminder of Aang rose up from just looking at them. Katara flushed and looked away, _besides, she wasn't ready to think of Sokka like that. He was her brother, her sweet, goofy, intelligent brother, and she didn't really need to think of him as anything different yet_, but then had to look back as Sokka finally spoke the words that had been weighing on their minds.

"So... what now?"

Sokka had chosen his moment well, in the natural lull between conversations where the vicissitude of breathing suited his question. A sudden solemnn air fell over the group as they came down from the thrill of having finally _won_, having risked it all and won, and they pondered that question.

"I guess the peace conference is our next big thing," Zuko finally said. Katara looked at him. The mention of the peace conference had made him sit straighter from where he'd been slumped, the few strands of hair escaping from his topknot framing his eyes. "We've made peace for now, but we'll have to ensure it continues. Even though I've no doubt that Chief Arnook, King Bumi, and King Kuei will be highly amenable to peace, hatred of the Fire Nation runs deep. It will be very difficult to ensure a lasting peace, but with all of us involved, I'm sure we can do it."

They nodded at that, but then Sokka interrupted. "Well, actually, I meant for those of us who aren't going to be dealing with the greats. What will we be doing in the next few days?"

A small corner of Zuko's mouth lifted. "You could help me with the paperwork I have to do. I never knew that reclaiming troops would involve so much reading."

Sokka smirked, the look of friendship they shared belying the sarcasm in his voice. "Sorry Zuko, I like you, but I don't like you _that_ much."

When their ribs finally stopped aching, Zuko spoke again. "Seriously, though?" he shrugged and sat back. "There's not really that much to do. We just have to recall back the troops we can, and get set to working on the peace conference and sending word to everyone that the war is officially over. And then I've got a meeting tomorrow with the Ministers to discuss what else the Fire Nation is going to do. I don't know. You guys could always take a well needed rest. We've all been running ragged for at least a year."

Suki curled her arm possessively around Sokka's side. "A rest sounds good," she chipped in, her eyes pointedly never leaving Sokka's leg. "Some of us need to heal, and it'll be good to relax. Do you have any recommendations, Zuko?"

The Fire Prince grinned slyly. "I don't know," he said, affecting an innocence that was completely betrayed by his twitching lip. "There's not much to do in the Fire Nation at this time of the year... other than say, pick up where we left the beach party... or, I don't know... the royal bathhouses... or you could take a trip to the Fire Nation markets, or..."

His grin widened at their rapt expressions. "Does that sound like enough? I haven't even started."

"Awesome!" Toph punched the air. "We so have to finish that beach party now that Angry Boy isn't trying to kill Aang again."

"Hmm... the bathhouses sound nice as well," Katara said dreamily.

As though remembering something, Zuko's brow suddenly furrowed. "Yeah," he said quietly. "Well, you guys are right in that you pretty much have the next few days to yourselves until the peace process starts heating up. But..."

He hesitated, seemingly unsure. Aang looked up, his gray eyes curious from where he'd been playing with Momo, just listening in.

"Zuko? Is something the matter?"

The Fire Prince rubbed the bridge of his nose and then looked down. "Actually, something is," he finally said. "I'm not sure how you guys feel about this, but... but it'd mean a lot to me if you..."

He breathed, and stopped. Katara suddenly felt all the warmth of the past hour evaporate and freeze in her heart. She had a very bad feeling where this was going, and she looked up at Zuko, trying frantically to signal with her eyes that no, it wasn't the time yet, and...

Too late. Zuko was looking at Aang as he spoke. "I know that we were never close, that she spent most of the time trying to kill you. But it'd mean a lot to me if you came to Azula's State Funeral in two days time."

For a moment, there was true silence. Too late, Zuko looked at Katara and realised how wide her eyes were, and what a big mistake he'd just made.

_Oh crap. _

"Wait, when did this happen?" Toph spoke up, her voice cutting cleanly through the air. "All we heard was that you and Sugarqueen got the best of her. What's this about her being _dead_?"

"Good question, Toph," Aang said, his voice deceptively calm. "Is there something you've been forgetting to tell us?"

The look that he aimed at Zuko was accusing, and Katara felt her heart spasm in her chest for a moment. There was no denying that she was annoyed at the Fire Prince for letting the bombshell slip so soon, but at the same time it galled her that Aang looked at Zuko first. She wasn't sure why. Objectively, if anyone were to have killed Azula, Zuko probably would have seemed the most likely culprit.

To anyone who hadn't been there, of course, watching the duel with their own eyes. Zuko had never once aimed to kill, Katara knew that. And so it stung just a little, and the hurt that opened up in Zuko's face for a second was enough to spur her into action.

"It wasn't Zuko, Aang," she said.

The look he gave her was uncomprehending, open and confused, and suddenly Aang had never seemed so much like a child to her, not even when she'd found his small form curled in ice.

"It was me."

* * *

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A/N II: As always, reviews are appreciated, and so are any constructive criticisms and helpful suggestions. :)


	4. Til Freedom Stirs Her Wings

**Chapter 4: 'Till Freedom Stirs Her Wings**

Disclaimer: Mike and Bryan, the show's creators, own Avatar: The Last Airbender, completely. I'm only showing my love of their world by playing in it.

A/N I: Hey again! Yes, I'm back with a new chapter, but before I begin I'd just like to thank ron mangley, XyoushaX, and Koolchamp for their reviews for my last post. They really kept me thinking and writing so I could have this chapter up today, so thanks guys! :) Although I must admit I'm kind of worried... eight reviews for the first two chapters, three for the third? Did my writing suddenly become crap? 0.0. Anyway, I guess that's beside the point since I've got another chappie here ready for you, so to whoever is still reading, thank you, and I hope you're enjoying the ride as much as I am!

* * *

_She weaves a song of water,_

_She drinks of many things,_

_Like pain, and hope, and darkness,_

'_Til freedom stirs her wings_

* * *

Today, Mai thought about freedom.

She often visited this set of memories. She decided that they'd become her favourite amidst all the tedium. It wasn't like they had much competition.

And so the black-haired girl lay on her back, the thin pallet doing nothing to cushion her from the hardness of the floor, and remembered the Fire Nation Academy. It was after the three of them had become friends, a few years following the wide-eyed innocence of backflips and crushing on Azula's brother. She remembered the curriculum, rigorous and well-rounded at first, before they had been faced with the choice of weapons specialisation...

For Azula it had been the easiest. Already lauded as a firebending prodigy, one of the greatest the nation had ever seen, she hadn't even had to choose. For Ty Lee, it hadn't been quite as simple, but simple enough. Her natural, almost supernatural agility and flexibility, as well as her aversion to blood, had primed her well for the rare form of chi-blocking. The old mistress who had taught it hadn't had such a promising student in decades, and had kept an eye on her all the years that they'd been through the more general curriculum of Arts and Culture and History... so in the end, Ty Lee hadn't really needed to choose either.

For Mai, however, it had been a different story. She wasn't a firebender. She was agile, but not preternaturally so. She was fast, but not exceptionally, and that was the same for nearly all of her attributes except one.

Her accuracy.

Even as a child, Mai had had a way with rocks and pebbles, a way that had been strongly discouraged by her parents, but had turned out to be her greatest asset. However, accuracy had only narrowed down the field. The Fire Nation Academy for Girls was prestigious and renowned, and it prided itself on the sheer range of specialisations available. Thus, even finding Mai's specific skill had left her with a substantial pool to choose from. And as the deadline drew closer, Mai had grown ever more agitated under her expressionless demeanour, leaving her vulnerable to Azula's taunts of normalcy.

Mai closed her eyes, and suddenly she was back in the dormitories again, and the princess sat straight-backed on the bed combing her hair. A few strands of hair caught in the brush and Azula tugged it out of her locks, frowning as she spoke to the girl by the window.

"You still haven't chosen? Hurry up and decide. Your indecision is so pathetic."

Mai's arms joined underneath the folds of her robes and she said nothing, just shrugged. Azula's eyes narrowed.

"Really, Mai, how long is this going to go on for? Make up your mind. How about archery or something?"

Mai shrugged again, looking away. "I don't like arrows."

With that, Azula frowned again, this time a deeper line that left a depression in her flawless skin. "Well figure out what you do like and do it quickly. Otherwise you'll be left behind, and you wouldn't like that, would you Mai? Being left behind, nothing special."

Mai turned away again, so that Azula couldn't see her grind her teeth.

And on it had gone, until the day before the deadline, when they went to the combined graduate demonstrations of the top students from both Fire Nation Academies. Mai let a faint smile trace her lips at the memory, so slight that it was almost invisible. It had been the three of them... no wait, Zuko had been there too... but for once, her eyes hadn't slid surreptitiously over to his form. Because it was there, on that day, that Mai had found her path.

As it was wont to be, the field set aside for demonstrations was full of dazzling displays and eye-catching performances that held more showmanship than substance. It was good politics, in a place where the achievements of the children made one look at the parents closer, perhaps sizing them up for promotions or marking them down on the list of potential allies or foes. But it had not been the flashes of fire or the displays of exotic weaponry that had caught Mai's eye.

It had been a boy, only a few years older than her. He'd stood out from the others simply because he hadn't been gushing fire, or wielding an instrument three times his size. Other than that, there was nothing special about him. His mid-length hair had been pulled up in a formal topknot, and his armour was polished brightly like anyone else's. Perhaps the only thing that seemed different was the look on his face.

Whoever he was, the boy had worn calm like a veil, no expression showing on his features as he'd faced a dummy made of rice paper as if it and he were the only things that mattered in the world. Hot rays stroked the space between them from the blazing orb in the sky, the air fluttering over the dummy and stirring lightly over his hair. As they'd watched, he'd crouched and unravelled something glinting from his fingers. And then, not even glancing back to look at his audience, he had reached out with whips of thorned wire so fast they could barely see him move.

The dummy had held together for an instant, before exploding without a sound.

Mai remembered watching with widened eyes as tiny pieces of paper had floated in the wind, feeling her thoughts soar free with them. There had been something about the moment, something that would stay with her forever. It wasn't just the speed or the grace. It had been... the complete concentration, the airbrushed beauty, the sheer accuracy. With one short burst of movement, the entire dummy had dissolved, and she imagined holding that kind of freedom in her hands, pinning it down in her grasp.

The boy had straightened and bowed to no one in particular. By that time, the wires had vanished from sight as if they had never been. But the memory of their flight never disappeared from. Even now, she remembered the sheer poetry of the moment where everything had flowed, where his fingers had extended and hit a million points of accuracy, and just how her mind had whirled on from there.

By the time she'd settled on her choice, feeling a strange giddy rush in her chest echoing the paper in the wind, she'd turned around and the boy was gone.

* * *

"It was me."

There was a breath. It was the Fire Nation, and so the braziers set into the walls crackled in the silence. Katara did not look away, every muscle in her body arched and tensed like she was about to fight. Her eyes were wide and glassy, and she seemed to hover in the air as Aang stared at her like the world was burning down.

And then he erupted.

"WHAT?!"

Zuko hadn't known that you could bend sound, but apparently you could. The air seemed to ripple and then spread, and it crashed over all of them like an unforgiving tide, shuddering the walls. In the distance, the Fire Prince heard glass crack, and he winced. Windows were expensive, and it wasn't like he really had a lot of money to throw around. But he certainly wasn't about to intervene now. As he watched, everyone in the room mirrored his recoil. Sokka and Suki seemed to shrink back in the armchair, the latter's arm tightening around her wounded partner as if to protect him. Momo had skittered to the floor at Aang's abrupt ascent, and his green eyes now shone wide and frightened. Even Toph's hands were clasped uselessly around her ears, real pain shining from her face.

But amidst them all, one person still stood strong, seemingly unaffected by the Avatar's anger. Katara never budged, her elbows pressed tight against her sides as her hands clenched in front of her. As the soundwaves of Aang's cry faded away, her eyes narrowed and she spoke, her voice low and dangerous.

"Oh fine, you want me to say it again?" A sort of frenzied determination crossed her face, and if Zuko had been standing, he knew he would have stepped back. "Well I will! It was me. ME! _I_ killed Azula. Not Zuko, ME!"

The words soaked in like rain. There was a moment, and then the deepest despair sunk across Aang's face and Katara watched as the boy before her became an ageless man, an eternal star. The change was subtle, but astounding. His grey eyes took a more ancient look than she could ever comprehend, and his young body shuddered under the strain of the world. And yet still he stood, strong... the strongest she had ever seen him. Stood, and exploded with the tightest control.

"I don't understand, Katara. You... you _know_ how hard it was for me," he took a breath. "You know how much it took for me to find another way. I had to travel all the way to meet a lion-turtle before I could make sense of it all! I... I had to talk to my past selves, and have them tell me over and over again that I had to kill him, to go against everything I ever wanted, everything I ever was!"

Aang looked down, as if it suddenly pained him too much to speak. The movement shadowed his face for a moment, but Katara could see the second that it changed, and the tight control fell away from him. Aang's head swung up again, and the look imprinted on his face was livid. For a moment, Katara seriously thought that he would lose himself and shudder into the Avatar state, but then it passed, and he was just a boy in front of her again.

An angry, hurt, boy.

"How could you, Katara?! You know how much life means to me! How could you just... throw it away like that?! How... how could you just _kill_ her?"

"It's not like I meant to!" she yelled. "It's not like I planned it! How can you stand there and accuse me like that? I did the best I could!"

It was funny, how much rage could pour out of such a little boy. "Well clearly you didn't, because Azula's dead! And clearly you meant to, because otherwise we wouldn't be standing here like this! You're not answering the question, Katara! _How could you just kill her?!_"

The words travelled across the space between them in slow motion. To the onlookers, it was like a breath, painfully exhaled. Katara felt it shivering, felt it coming, and then it slapped her and it was her breaking point.

"Well I'm sorry!" Katara shouted, her fists clenched tight by her side. "What would you have done if your water was running out? If a comet-crazed firebender had just blown up half the stadium?What would _you_ have done if Zuko was dying five feet away from you, and Azula was about throw a fireball down your throat?! _Let_ _him_ _die_?!"

Aang's eyes shone furious. "I would have done something! I would have at least tried to find another way! I _did_ find another way. I fought Ozai and I didn't kill him!"

"Well good for you, Aang!" her voice cracked slightly, real pain swathing her eyes. "Good for you!"

He wasn't finished. Breath heaved in and out, deflating his small chest, but then he misread the look on her face and his voice turned to pleading. "Come on, Katara, I know you're not stupid. You're one of the cleverest people I know! You could have thought of _something_!"

In the captured crystal of the moment, everyone knew the instant that she snapped. Somehow, the temperature in the room dropped several degrees. There was nothing in the wind, a stillness that didn't seem bearable as Katara's eyes seemed to freeze over. And when she finally spoke again, her voice carried the chill of an Arctic night.

"I **did** think of something. I'm just sorry that it wasn't _good_ enough for you."

It slapped the Avatar across the face. Aang stepped back, shock and confusion wreathing his feet as the coldness crept across the floor and wound itself around their skin. The ringing silence that followed shot daggers in their ears. The moment might as well have been frozen in ice. No one moved, it was just the two players in the centre of the room, and it was a standstill, a standoff. And as Zuko's gaze shuddered and slipped surreptitiously around the room, he knew that the shock written on their faces was written on his.

But he couldn't sit by any longer, not while two of his friends suffered. It wasn't right, it couldn't be right, not after all they'd gone through together. And so Zuko opened his mouth, readying himself to say something even as his heart sank into his gut. This was between Katara and Aang, and he knew that he had no right to interfere, but...

Just before he spoke, there was a clattering in the hall outside, and everyone suddenly swivelled to face the door.

"Prince Zuko!"

It was Shen Li. Zuko's head snapped up, and he couldn't help but marvel at the young man's timing. For a moment, he wasn't sure whether he was grateful, but then that thought evaporated as the guard captain stepped forwards, agitation twisted in his stance.

"Prince Zuko! There's been an uprising in the Eastern square!"

Zuko froze. "_What_?"

"An uprising! In the Eastern square! The remaining Imperial firebenders are trying to subdue it now, but you must come quickly!"

They didn't stop to think. Within seconds Zuko and Aang were gone, the former sprinting for the entrance, the latter retrieving his glider before running out after him. The rest of them sat in stunned silence, the news taking a little while longer to sink in.

They had just risked their lives for a hard-won peace... and it was already over?

Then they moved as one. Sokka tried to stand, but he made it five inches before Suki dragged him down again. "Don't you dare," she hissed in his ear. "You've played hero enough for the last few days. It'll be fine."

Sokka wavered, "It doesn't feel right," but then he sat down again, just as across the room, Katara jerked in response and felt her hand spring to her waterskin. She was already drawing out the stopper when five small fingers clamped around her wrist.

Katara looked down in shock. "Toph?"

The earthbender held on, her mouth set in a grim line. "Twinkletoes and Hothead will be fine. But _we_ need to talk."

Katara wavered, her mind still caught in turmoil. Only seconds before, rage and pain had flooded her veins with such strength she'd wondered how she could hold it all. The stolidity of Toph's gaze was what anchored her. With one last, semi-despairing look out the door where Zuko and Aang had vanished, Katara let herself be led away.

* * *

Toph took Katara to a balcony of stone. It felt right under her feet, the strength of the rock suspended above the air strangely comforting to her senses. When they reached the railings, the younger girl loosened her grip, and Katara took a shuddering breath.

"You wanted to talk?" she asked weakly.

Toph stamped her foot and brought up a seat of stone beneath her. "Yeah," she nodded shortly. "But I'll let you calm down first. Your heart's pounding like a rabbiroo's."

"Thanks."

The two girls were silent for a moment as Katara tried to calm herself down. She didn't like the feeling of the anger still twisting inside her; it felt ugly as it tangled around her insides and poisoned her blood. She wanted to scream, she wanted to sob, she wanted to feel an ocean of water crashing around her at her will... but there was none around, and she didn't dare cry out now. So she just felt it bottle up inside her, like steam pushing against a boiling pot, and waited for the explosion.

"Or... we could talk now," Toph said dryly, her ear cocked to the ground. "Since it doesn't sound like the fresh air's doing much."

"No it isn't," Katara agreed tightly, her fists still clenched. "I just... arrgh! I couldn't even kill that... man, that monster who took my mother away. And... and I _wanted_ to. And he knew that! So how can he blame me like this?"

Toph hmmphed. "Sounds like he's not the only one."

"Well of course!" the waterbender threw her hands up in disgust. "It's not like I'm happy about this either! I didn't... I didn't want to kill her. I... Oh La, Toph. She spoke to me before she died. She asked me if she was a monster."

The younger girl stilled. "What'd you say?"

"I told her no. I'd just watched half the people in the arena go up in flames because of her, and I said no."

Katara shook her head, a bitter laugh escaping her lips. "And I meant it. I mean, who am I to judge now? I just... killed her Toph. She died. In my arms. I could have healed her maybe, I don't know... the thought didn't even occur to me then. I was just so worried about Zuko, and she was about to shove a fireball down my throat, and I..."

"If you'd healed her, she probably would have just gotten up and tried to kill you again," Toph interjected bluntly. She was beginning to be just a little bit impatient... worried as she was about both Twinkletoes and Sugarqueen, she hadn't dragged the latter out just to hear her keep going on and on. She pushed herself off the slab of stone and let it sink back down into the ground again. "Stop trying to justify yourself. I get it. You killed her because she was about to off you, and Zuko was hurt."

Toph paused. "How did that happen, by the way?"

Katara's eyes clarified to form a translucent mirror. "Azula shot lightning at me, and he jumped in front of it to save me. La, Toph, I can't describe it. It's like... he filled up from the inside out with light. I haven't been so scared since Azula killed Aang at Ba Sing Se."

Toph chuckled dryly. "Wow Sugarqueen, you sure are making a habit out of this. A guy gets close to you, and then Azula shoots him down."

Katara jerked, and annoyance filled her eyes. "What's _that_ supposed to mean?"

"Hey," Toph put her hands up in surrender. "I just wanted to point the pattern out. Take it however you like."

"Huh," Katara's mouth thinned. "I'm not so sure you can just equate Aang and Zuko like that. Besides, I think your pattern has officially been broken." Her voice slowed and saddened. "Azula can't really do much of anything now."

Toph rolled her eyes. "Oh lighten up! I don't get you. Azula shoots Aang down, and you get all mad at Zuko. Azula shoots Zuko down, you kill her, and then you get all mad at yourself _and_ Aang. Why aren't you ever mad at Azula?"

Katara bit her lip. "It's not that I'm not, it's just..."

"Just _what_? I mean, it's over now. Fine, it's not like we condone indiscriminate killing, but you did what you had to. We were all ready to do what we had to to stop the war. And we won. Isn't that what matters?"

Katara half-smiled. "When did you get so wise?" she joked weakly, before her eyes grew hard. Shivering slightly from the wind, she turned away to face the balcony, her arms crossed against her skin. "Seriously? Aside from my own feelings about that, that's clearly not what Aang thinks."

Toph felt a sigh work itself all the way up from her toes. Both Katara and Aang were older than her, Twinkletoes by only a few months, but they really didn't seem to be showing it.

"Aang will get over it," she said, trying to be reassuring. "You know him and his spiritual-ness, all higher self, chakras, forgiveness, and blah, blah, blah... he wouldn't be himself if he stayed angry at you for long."

Katara slumped at that, her elbows leaning forwards to rest on the railings. "That's the thing, Toph," she said softly. "I think it's more complicated than that. I don't know what it was, but while we were fighting back there I... I didn't recognise him for a moment."

Toph stared at the ground. "Aang's... different," she said. "I can feel his heartbeat. Before, it was all twittery, like a bird in a cage. Now it's... I don't know. Stronger. More sure. I know you didn't see him when he downed Ozai..." she stopped abruptly and chuckled. "Fine, technically, I didn't either. But I didn't have to. When I stepped onto the rock with him, he felt like the mountain itself."

Katara looked far away, into the steeples of the Fire Nation crags. "And tonight?" she asked softly. "When we were fighting?"

Toph looked down. "Like a bird in a cage again."

Katara exhaled. "Great, just great. Not only do I kill Azula, but the day he comes back after the fight of his life I make him lose his control again. What _else_ can I do wrong?"

Toph frowned. "Hey, it wasn't like you were forcing him to do anything. It's Aang's fault he lost control, not yours. He just needs to solidify himself." The little girl cocked her head and then looked sightlessly in Katara's direction. "'Sides, what's with you? Why do you have to take the blame? I swear, Sugarqueen, you're too motherly for your own good."

At any other time, Katara might have argued with her. But tonight, the tumult of emotions that had flowed through her had left her just too tired. Perhaps that was why she spoke before she could think.

"Obviously I'm not being 'motherly' enough, or I maybe I'm not doing it right. Why else would Aang keep trying to kiss me?"

The instant the words were out of her mouth, Katara's eyes went huge. Next to her, she didn't see Toph smirk knowingly and test the ground beneath her feet as Katara reached out to try to snatch the words back from the air.

"No! I did not just say that. I didn't. There was no saying. Heh..." she looked askance at the earthbender beside her, hopefulness in her voice. "I don't suppose you could forget I said that?"

Toph's smirk grew wider. "Not a chance, Sugarqueen. Besides, that's something else I wanted to talk to you about."

Katara groaned, and sank even lower onto the stone. "You knew?" she mumbled into her hands.

Toph scuffed her foot on the floor. "I'm blind, not stupid," she scoffed, before her eyes opened wide. "Wait, don't tell me _you_ didn't know."

A light blush stained the other girl's cheeks. Even though Toph couldn't see it, she could feel the guilty twitch of Katara's heartbeat and she couldn't help but laugh.

"Of course I knew," the waterbender muttered. "At least, I guessed. It just kind of became obvious when he said it."

"Then why didn't you do anything?"

Katara moved up again, resting her hands lightly against the stone. "I... didn't know what to say. I mean, we were in the middle of a war, Toph. I was confused. I'm still confused. Besides..." Katara shook her head in bewilderment. "He's like... he's like a boy to me."

Toph arched an eyebrow and kicked up the seat of stone beneath her again. This might be a long wait. "Explain."

Katara leaned her cheek on her palm and looked out into the Fire Nation. Its capitol spread out below, lights twinkling in the night, and she forgot completely that right now, beneath the peaceful exterior, the boy she was talking about was putting down an uprising. "From the beginning, when I found him curled up in that iceberg, I've just always felt like I needed to protect him. He was so small against the white, and again when my village tried to kick him out. And then he was swallowed up by that Fire Nation ship and I remember feeling so, so scared... I just wanted to know he was safe. Protect him. Like... like a child."

Toph felt that surely now, she could be described as patient. "Uh... reality check, Sugarqueen. Aang's the Avatar."

Katara exhaled in frustration and turned away from the railing. "I know, I know that! Of all of us, I think I know that the best! I mean... I've always been there when he's lost control, when he's gone into the Avatar State, and it's scary... but I've still fought my fear and I've held him. I've caught him. I've healed him. I've fought through screaming wind and boiling seas, and... I know what he is."

There was a long, long, silence.

"No you don't, Sugarqueen."

Katara paused. "_What_?"

Toph stood, and the crunch of rock accompanied her. "You heard me. You don't know what he is. You know what he _was_. Open your eyes, Katara. Aang has changed. How many times do you want me to repeat it?

The waterbender froze. _How about never? Then I won't have to think about it. _

As if she'd said the words out loud, Toph let out a loud, hearty sigh. "Aang. Is. Different. Changed. Transformed. Metamorphosed. Whatever you want to call it!"

Katara shook her head in denial. "But he's still _Aang_." _Still the boy I rescued. Still the boy I held._

Toph paused, as if considering that for a moment, and then she jerked her head, and Katara wasn't sure whether it was a nod or a shake. "Maybe. But he's _Avatar_ _Aang_."

Again, her blindness didn't stop her knowing that the older girl was staring at her. Toph sighed again. Who'd have thought that Sugarqueen could be so dense? Then again, ice did float. Toph put her hands on her hips.

"Look, I'm not saying he's someone completely different. He's still the Aang we know. But changed. Evolved."

Katara bit her lip. That did make sense. But still... "Then how do you explain what happened just then? Before?"

Toph blew a strand of her fringe away from her face. "What, when you two were yelling at each other?"

Katara nodded. and then remembered. "Yeah," she said aloud, a slightly ashamed tone colouring her voice.

Toph smirked. "I don't know, I think it's pretty obvious to me. Aang's the Avatar, not a saint."

The waterbender looked away. "Whatever he is, he's still a kid."

"Oh really now?" Toph's lip curled. "It sure didn't _feel_ like you thought he was just a kid at that dance."

Katara froze. "What do you...?"

Toph just stood there, smirking, and all of a sudden Katara felt the blood rush to her cheeks. Oh. Right. _That_ dance.

_It wasn't like it meant anything, I mean, we weren't even dancing together most of the time, even when we were in that big circle... and it was just some crazy spur-of-the-moment thing, and..._

With a moan, she crumpled onto the balcony again, leaning her forehead against her folded arms. "I am _so_ confused."

Toph snorted. "Yeah. No kidding." The small earthbender stretched her toes, and then moved to clunk her own arms down on the thick stone railing. "The real question is, what do you plan to do about it?"

There was a beat, a pause, a break in the air as she thought. "I don't know," Katara said slowly, twisting her hair in her hands. It had grown so long since she'd left the South Pole. Or perhaps it hadn't changed at all, it was just herself. "I don't even know what I'll do tomorrow, now, what we'll all do after this war. I just know I don't want it to end like this. I don't just want to go back and live a quiet life and marry a boy like a good Water Tribe girl. I want..."

She stopped, suddenly, as an idea suddenly occurred to her. Toph's skin prickled in the silence. Below her feet, she felt the vibrations coming from the girl next to her suddenly pick up speed, until her heartbeat was thrumming. When Katara finally spoke, her voice was low and urgent.

"Toph, what was it like when you left your parents?"

Whatever she had been expecting, she certainly hadn't been expecting this. The earthbender took a deep, quelling breath before she replied. "It was... exciting," she whispered. "It was scary. It was like nothing I'd ever done before... and it was just so _freeing_."

Toph raised her head to the sky, and even though she couldn't see the stars, she could feel the wind kiss her temple and she smiled. "And even though I know it must have hurt my parents, I don't regret a second of it. I know that sounds selfish, but it's true. If I hadn't left, I wouldn't be standing here right now, a war hero. If I hadn't left, I wouldn't have become the greatest earthbender in the world. If I hadn't left, I wouldn't have known you guys. Leaving made me find myself."

Toph suddenly stopped. Katara's heart rate had dropped again, and it beat surely and steadily now like a drum. The younger girl cocked her head. "Wait, why do you ask?"

Katara didn't say anything, and then... "You said Aang had changed, right? That he was in control. Fully realised. He was Avatar Aang."

"Yeah," Toph resisted the urge to roll her eyes. It wasn't like she hadn't repeated herself, or anything. "Why?"

Katara straightened and looked out from the balcony with purpose. Her eyes rolled across the Fire Nation, down to its beaches, across the ocean, and back again to its craggy peaks. A faint tugging pulled in her chest, calling her like Yue sung to her at night, and suddenly, for the first time since she'd sunk that ice dagger into Azula's chest, Katara felt like herself.

Toph felt it in the stone, a subtle shift that made her smile. And across from her, Katara mirrored her grin.

_Why? _

"Because I think it's my turn to run away from home."

* * *

-

-

A/N II: As always, reviews are mucho appreciated, and so are any constructive criticisms and helpful suggestions. :)


	5. Shifting Sands

**Chapter 5: Shifting Sands**

Disclaimer: Mike and Bryan, the show's creators, own Avatar: The Last Airbender, completely. I'm only showing my love of their world by playing in it.

A/N I: Hey again! Yes, I'm back with a new chapter, but before I begin I'd just like to thank ron mangley, XyoushaX, and Koolchamp for their reviews for my last post. They really kept me thinking and writing so I could have this chapter up today, so thanks guys! :) Although I must admit I'm kind of worried... eight reviews for the first two chapters, three for the third? Did my writing suddenly become crap? 0.0. Anyway, I guess that's beside the point since I've got another chappie here ready for you, so to whoever is still reading, thank you, and I hope you're enjoying the ride as much as I am!

* * *

_Let wind and earth conspire your song,_

_And lift you briefly through the air,_

_To wait beneath the path you've wronged,_

_For shifting sands to bring you there_

* * *

_Two days earlier._

Feng's face was the stone he controlled as he walked down to the pier. Behind him, he felt the vibrations of the team he controlled, strong but uncertain. He didn't blame them. He wasn't entirely sure what to do either. All he knew was that they couldn't stay on Fire Nation grounds, not unless they wanted to be scorched from the inside out with the Fire Lord-to-be's lightning.

He still didn't understand what had happened.

They had always shown their loyalty. Always. It hadn't been a question of choosing between the man he was named for and a new leader, it had been a matter of meeting the strength of one who could wield them as they had always meant to be. A weapon. No more would they inspire fear in common grovelling citizens. They could be the elite units of a new era, the only Earthbenders allowed to practice, and the army of the ever-ascending Fire Princess.

But somewhere along the way, it had gone wrong.

Feng looked up and saw the endless expanse of ocean greeting them. His emotionless eyes roved around the ships, trying to pick one suitable for his purpose. With the news of the Phoenix King's coming victory, most were packed with units prepared to secure the rest of the Earth Kingdom. Those would have to do. It wasn't like they had any choice.

A muscle in his cheek twitched, jerking under his unfathomable skin. The truth was that they didn't have a choice either way. The Earth Kingdom as they knew it would be obliterated, and as proclaimed exiles from their ruler, they might face a similar fate. Still, between a protracted, miserable existence and a quick, pain-filled death by blue flame, Feng knew exactly which one he would choose.

The Dai Li were strong. There was yet a chance they could survive in this hostile world. There was yet a chance that they could reclaim their position. The Fire Princess had been slipping. Perhaps the Phoenix King's victory were not assured...

Feng frowned. That would probably make matters even worse. The Avatar would not be likely to look kindly on those who had once been his adversaries. That would make little sense.

Feng's frown deepened. Either way, whatever happened, he and his agents were caught. Trapped. He suddenly wanted to sink his feet into the ground and pull up mountains, make the earth crash beneath him and shudder this part of the world in a quake of fury none of them had ever seen before...

He calmed.

"Guang. Hai. We will board the second ship from the left when it leaves."

His men behind him, whose rock-hard nerves had been strained by the wait, finally relaxed. The anticipation was over. Come what may, they had a path again. The decision had been made. They would follow it to the end, until...

"I don't think you want to do that."

Feng's shaded head snapped around. The man on the pier regarded him coolly, the sharp edges of his armour hidden under a blood-red cloak. As one, the Dai Li raised their hands into battle position and readied themselves, but whoever he was, the man only looked slightly bored as he regarded them.

"Who are you?" Feng asked quietly.

The man smiled, and Feng observed that he had a perfect line of white teeth that flashed like a predator's. "I, Feng, and whoever you want me to be. A friend, a leader, an ally... an enemy."

Feng's expression did not change as he tightened his stance. "What do you want?"

The man's smile widened, and there was something about it that made him feel uneasy. It was the smile of a cat-shark, and it reminded Feng so uncannily of his former mistress that he had to check his surroundings. He still wasn't ready to die just yet.

"I want the world," the man said.

If possible, Feng's already tried nerves stretched a bit tighter. It was never good to bargain with someone insane, and yet the aura of command shimmering around the man looked as if he had no choice.

"What do you want?" Feng repeated quietly.

The man's smile disappeared. "I want to be sure. I want to be certain. There is far too much hanging at stake, so I want to be ready for any contingency. And that's why I want you to take the third boat."

Feng paused, and then gave the man a measured look. He wasn't young - perhaps in his middle years, but his body was as hard and war-trained as Feng's own. There seemed to be no distinguishing feature that Feng could use to pick him out of a crowd; every other Fire Nation man he had seen had the same topknot, the same build, the same...

Feng's gaze travelled up the man's eyes, and that was when the Dai Li decided to give him a name. _Hawk Eyes. _Because somehow, Feng was very sure that he would never know the man's true identity. The makeshift moniker would have to suffice.

Feng's eyes slipped, and he noticed that the stranger's secretive, predatory smile had returned. Reluctantly, Feng allowed himself a quick glance again at the pier. The boat in question was yet another war boat bound for the Earth Kingdom, and he relaxed the control over himself just enough to let his features frown again.

"How is that any different?"

Feng saw the amusement cross over Hawk-eyes' face. "It will allow you to be contacted, and to be used. I would hurry. It leaves soon."

Feng felt the tremors in the ground. He knew without looking that the rest of his team was staring at his green-clad back, waiting for his decision. He looked at the man's sharp, claw-scarred cheek and then back into his eyes.

"Very well," he said, and hoped he wasn't making a deadly mistake.

Whatever comfort had been drawn from his decision, however, was soon lost. As Feng turned away, readying himself to board the ship, Hawk-eyes' clear cut voice rang out once more.

"What of the last company of Dai Li?"

Feng paused, frozen. He didn't know how long the man had been at the pier, or how long he had kept watch. He knew himself that two companies had gone ahead of him, but yet he didn't see any on the ships now. The urge to ask, to question what exactly was going on was so strong that he almost opened his mouth to let the words out, but then his rock-hard will reasserted himself.

He would show no weakness. Because weakness would be destroyed.

"They are following," Feng said emotionlessly, not looking back at the stranger. Feeling the life suddenly jolt back into his legs, the Dai Li company leader walked towards their designated ship, wondering at what would happen.

From behind him, he heard a low chuckle.

"Perfect," Hawk-eyes said, and when Feng's will snapped and he finally turned his head, the man had disappeared.

* * *

Fire.

Aang wasn't sure what he had expected, after all this was the Fire Nation. But still, as he ghosted high above the capital and watched the flames disperse, he felt a cold chill nestling in his stomach.

The uprising had been put down, seconds before they arrived. The remaining Imperial Firebenders had been well-trained for events like these, but Aang shuddered to witness their cool efficiency in the face of their own people. Not he wasn't all right with the fact that the young men and women were in custody now as he flew. The problem went far deeper than that.

Aang closed his eyes and soared. There really wasn't much point to him doing a surveillance check, he knew that. Anyone else who wanted to cause trouble tonight would have to deal with the soldiers; an entire garrison of them had already been reclaimed from outposts near the city. But the air cleared his thoughts, and he wanted to give Zuko some time before he returned. As the Fire Prince had stood and heard the cries of his people, the air still smoking around him, the night had made the shadows swallow his scar.

Aang felt a pulse in his heart, and he urged his glider higher with a gust of wind. The Fire Nation looked peaceful from up here. What he had seen minutes before had proved that it was not. Aang sighed and let the glider fall again, bringing him closer to the ground. Had he truly expected everything to be all right after he defeated Ozai? For everything to fall into place?

No.

But inside, a part of him had hoped that that would be true. Still, as Avatar Aang was faced with the reality, he couldn't help but feel the internal strength settle from within him, the sense of completion, power, and purpose he'd felt from the moment his back had hit the rock.

The rock. A smile came to Aang's face. He'd have to tell Toph that it was earth that had finally freed his chakras of their blockage. That it was earth that had saved the world and the Avatar from Ozai's fire. She'd love that. He probably wouldn't hear the end of it for weeks.

Sighing again, Aang let his flight spiral into a turn and swung back towards the Fire Palace. Zuko was likely there already, waiting in the courtyard. The rest of them would be there as well. And Katara.

She'd be there too.

Aang breathed, and felt his heart thump painfully against his ribs. The look on her face had been... he been so close to shifting into the Avatar state then and there, before jerking back, horrified at the thought. Katara didn't deserve that. He'd seen the truth written in her body, in her expressive, beautiful eyes. He'd known she hadn't meant it. He'd known that.

And yet, he was still so angry.

Aang breathed again, and felt the spirit of hundreds of Avatars before him consolidate within him shakily. He was angry, yes, but he wasn't so sure that it was at her. And so he pushed it away, consciously drawing upon the shifting balance of power inside him. He still hadn't quite gotten used to it, but he knew now how natural it felt. He was the Avatar. There was no running away from that. And now that he not only mastered the elements, but mastered himself, he _could_ control his feelings. He _could_ let his duties come first. He _could_ do this.

...

But not quite yet.

Aang let the wind carry him down into the Fire Palace, seeing the forms of Zuko and the Imperial Firebenders awaiting. With them came the last chance of peace, and Aang closed his eyes briefly before alighting. Whatever the future would bring, he knew that he would have to consolidate himself, and to do that, he would have to find answers to the feelings inside him. He wasn't naive enough anymore to think that with the mastering of the Avatar state, his journey was over. If anything, speaking to all of his past selves had told him that.

Aang opened his eyes, saw the Fire Prince approaching, and controlled his breath. It was time to visit Guru Pahtik again. He knew that. But at the moment, the immediacy of the situation meant he had to deal with this first.

"Everything clear, Avatar?" Zuko asked, his voice rasping slightly. Aang briefly wondered how loud he'd had to shout, had to scream over the crowd; their soon-to-be ruler ascended on a flame of fire. He nodded, and saw the Prince physically relax before turning back to the nearest guard. The man flipped his helmet open, and Aang had to search his memory for a name. Chen Lu? Shen Lu? Shen Li? One of them sounded right.

"I doubt there will be another attack tonight," the guard captain said quietly. "Perhaps we should retire to the palace to talk things through."

Aang saw Zuko's frown, then his nod, and understood. _Perhaps we should get inside so no one else can hear. _

And as the Avatar followed in the footsteps of his friend, hearing the phalanx of Fire Nation guards close behind him, he knew that he suddenly hated this situation.

* * *

They talked into the night; the Avatar, Zuko, and the guard captain. Aang only questioned Shen Li's presence once, and had immediately regretted it when a dark shadow passed across the Fire Prince's face. And eventually, he was almost glad for it. Shen Li seemed to know things that neither had considered, not even Zuko with his royal upbringing. Matters like the minutiae of treaties, the contracts that would be needed, the problems of levies, taxes, internal and external affairs, reparations, imports and exports, restructuring the market. Aang still wasn't quite sure how they all exactly tied into the matter at hand; the fact that there was some sort of rebel movement against them already. But he was beginning to get a picture of the rest of his life, and he wasn't liking how it looked.

When Shen Li finally mentioned the matter of keeping some of the old Fire Nation generals on hand, to pacify the noble families, the Avatar finally cracked.

"Look, I'm sorry guys. I know how this is the way things have always been done, but this isn't the way we're going to end this. Not like this."

Shen Li had long abandoned his helmet, and he interlinked his fingers as he leaned forwards. "I'm sorry, Avatar," he said softly. "I know that after the war, such unpleasantness is hard to take. But it will have to be done, else the world will fall into battle again."

Aang's mouth hardened, and he stood up. "Not under my watch, it won't. I managed to defeat Fire Lord Ozai without killing him. This can be different too."

The guard captain was still. "It is my country..." his eyes flashed quickly to Zuko and then turned back. "It is our country that will suffer the most under what is to come," he murmured. "Believe me when I say that I don't want this to pass as much as you. But it will happen. So we must be prepared."

Aang felt the quiet within him, felt the strength. "No. I ended this war without hatred, I'm going to make sure the peace starts without it as well. And everyone is just going to have to deal with that."

Even as he said the words, he knew he was being stubborn. But every word rang true to his ear and fell close to his heart. He saw a rising flicker of irritation behind Shen Li's eyes as he moved to speak, but then Zuko moved first.

"What will come will come. Perhaps it's getting too late tonight for this."

Aang opened his mouth to reply, but then clamped it shut and let a small grin dance over his face. Who'd have ever guessed that Angry Boy would become a diplomat?

"Agreed," Shen Li said at last, sitting back into his chair. "We have much to do tomorrow. The Ministerial meeting, the ordering of affairs... and something surprising will invariably come up." A sudden thought seemed to occur to him, and he cocked his head. "And have you looked at that second scroll I brought you, Prince Zuko?"

Aang watched with some curiosity as Zuko jerked. "What second scroll?"

Shen Li's eyes widened slightly. "The one I left near your desk last night. I... assumed that you would notice it."

Zuko opened his mouth as if to let out a curse, but then breathing deeply. "Okay. That's fine. I'll have a look at it tomorrow."

Aang looked from one to the other, noting the sudden tension in both. "Well if we're done here, I guess I'd better go get some rest."

He made it five steps to the door before he heard Zuko's own chair scrape across the floor. The Avatar turned, questioning, to see yet another shadow chase itself across his friend's face.

"Zuko?" he asked uncertainly. "What's wrong?"

The Fire Prince paused, and Aang could almost see Zuko's thoughts chasing themselves across his face. Finally Zuko cleared his throat slightly and looked squarely at him.

"We'll need you, Avatar."

There was a beat, and Aang inclined his head without changing his expression. He'd gotten so used to hearing his name from Zuko that it was a shock to hear his title again. And yet he knew why Zuko had done it, and he felt the responsibility settle in on his shoulders like a cloak.

"I'll be ready," Aang promised, and let the door close between them.

* * *

_Fire._

_Shouting._

_Burning._

_Zuko rode on a wave of flame, and wasn't he glad that the palanquin had never made it in time? Because really... even if it wasn't the place of a prince to walk anywhere, a litter would have been too out of place here._

_The crowd swelled, a circle around the Imperial Firebenders standing back to back and throwing warning flame at their own people. He was only glad that it wasn't the crowd he had to fear. _

_No._

_It was a small, small group of men and women. Some young, some old. They looked so normal, his people. Even as their faces twisted and their eyes screamed and the hatred in their voice burnt his soul._

"_DOWN WITH PRINCE ZUKO! DOWN WITH THE TRAITOR PRINCE! DOWN! DOWN! DOWN!"_

_And so he'd gone up._

_Against the dragging voices, the weights on his feet and his heart, Zuko let the fire beneath him spiral up until he was soaring, and the sheer exuding heat of that pillar of flame made the uprisers subdue. And he'd spoken with the Avatar coiled in the air above him, spoken in time with his friend so that their combined voices rolled across the square._

"_Enough!"_

_And it had been._

_Zuko only wished that the memory, that the dream had ended there._

_No._

_Because as Prince Zuko had lifted his arm and gestured, had watched the now silent crowd disperse and the group be herded away by his guards, it had kept going._

_In real life, Zuko had not heard the whistle of the dart. In his dream, it shrieked in his ear as loud as banshee. He wondered if in this nightmare it would land this time, hit its mark and bury itself in his heart. He watched it morbidly as it came closer, a tiny package of death and hatred. _

_Despite all that had happened, all that he'd been through, all that he'd done... he was still only seventeen._

_Zuko waited for the end._

_But before it could hit, there was another sound... a sharp scything through the air. And then a body leapt up, and Zuko knew without looking that it was Shen Li. _

_Zuko fell back down to earth._

_In real life, the guards had remained, the Avatar hovering protectively above him had remained. In the dream, the entire Fire Nation capital became empty and shadow-like, a husk that threatened to fall apart with a breath. Zuko landed heavily and felt his knees buckle. He groaned and then stood up, because he never gave up, not without a fight. Never without a fight. And he walked towards the kneeling,bowing, figure of his guard, and saw the dart presented up to him like a gift._

_Zuko picked it up and rolled it over in his fingers. It was cool but sticky, and the strangeness of that fact hit his nervous system before it hit his mind. Zuko dropped it, and it rang like a tolling bell as it hit the floor._

"_Shen Li?" he whispered, his voice as husk-like as his city._

"_Poison, my Lord," the guard captain confirmed, before raising his head and showing Zuko the livid red burn of a scar across his face, a scar that licked at his eye, spread its mangled mess down to his cheek, extended out to his ear..._

_Zuko screamed..._

And woke.

It was still dark outside. The Fire Prince sat up, his gasping breaths sending bursts of air across the bed. The sweat-stained sheets stuck to his skin. It was warm, but the fire in his room had long died down and he felt far too shaky to do anything about it.

Well.

It had been a while since he had had such a nightmare.

Zuko shivered, feeling the sweat cooling on his body. The gauzy curtains that surrounded the bed suddenly seemed too stifling, so he swung his legs over the edge and stood. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw his dresser and the dart that lay on it. Shuddering, he turned away.

Sleep still gummed his eyes, and he wiped it away as he stepped into the center of his room. Gradually, he felt the cool breeze wafting in from his open window waken him. His breathing evened out, and Zuko closed his eyes and felt the air brush gently against him. It was all right. He was all right.

Still, he felt too awake now, and far too wired to go back to sleep. Sighing, he cast a glance around the emptiness of his room. He couldn't stay here for the next couple of hours, or however long it would taken until the sun rose. Zuko threw a heavy robe around his shoulders and set out into the corridor without thinking, letting his footsteps carry him instinctively to where he was needed.

Because the Fire Prince had work to do.

Lots of work.

The door to the Fire Lord's bedchamber came closer as he patted towards it, looming towards him like something alive. He kept his features steady as he swung it open and stepped through. He still refused to sleep there... and he wasn't planning to until he was forced by his coronation. He immediately turned left and stepped into his study.

It hadn't been more then twelve hours since he'd left it, but already it seemed like his desk had been hit by an explosion. Zuko stepped past the map on the floor with a groan to survey the damage. The neatly ordered columns of documents he'd remembered had somehow multiplied, and then bred into mountains of ungainly heaps. Scowling, Zuko lit a flame in his palm without thinking. It hovered there for a second, dancing in the air, before he extinguished it with a sigh. It wouldn't do for him to burn his office down only two days after moving in. It just wouldn't do.

There were at least three reports on the agricultural state of the Nation, five on the infrastructural, and two on the global economy. Zuko rubbed the bridge of his nose absentmindedly as he read. Their coffers had been noticeably dented by the war, but the spoils that had come with the battle had kept their heads well above sinking level. Not to mention, it seemed that they had fairly high levels of employment. He rubbed his nose again. From what he'd been taught, this was all fairly characteristic of a war-time economy... but that wasn't what they were now. They'd have to make some serious adjustments, and fast, otherwise they'd be sinking quicker than a ostrich-horse in summer.

That was depressing. Zuko shook his head. He'd go through all of this when he met with the Ministers... after all, they were the experts in this. He'd knew he had to be careful; he couldn't trust half of them as far as he could throw them. And that was probably an underexaggeration, especially since he was sure he could throw them relatively far. If the timing had been right, Zuko would have wanted to literally throw out the lot of them, preferably into the dungeon where they likely belonged. But to do that now would result in an uproar amongst the rest of the nobility, uncertainty, problems, backstabbing... the worst case scenario there would lead to a civil war being dumped on his hands, and he hadn't even been crowned Fire Lord yet.

Zuko sighed. He'd have to listen to them for now, it seemed, although that didn't mean that he wouldn't cross check their words against his own meagre knowledge. He had had a basic grasp of the principles drilled into him over the years as Prince by patient and diligent tutors, but that was really all he had. He just hoped that it would suffice. Because for any balance, any honour to be restored after this, reparations would have to be made. And the last time he checked, reparations cost a lot of money.

Still, there were other things to be attended to first. Things like recalling the armies, signing the papers, releasing the war prisoners...

Prisoners...

Mai.

Suddenly, Zuko felt an incredible rush of guilt rip through his chest. Mai. He hadn't thought of her since that breathtaking moment at the Boiling Rock... and then a few times afterwards, perhaps. But then again, thoughts of her at that time had been easily eclipsed by the thought of the comet and the ending of the Earth Kingdom as they all knew it. Still, that was no reason for him to have forgotten now, when he had time to think. Mai. What had happened to Mai after the Boiling Rock? A slow shudder passed through his frame. Surely Azula wouldn't have killed her loyal friend? Suddenly, he wanted to run back and question her, but no... that was stupidity. Azula was dead. She couldn't answer him.

Zuko breathed. He'd thought about prisoners, and that had been what had led him to thoughts of Mai. And that was logical, wasn't it? Mai was far more likely to be imprisoned somewhere, she'd been on the Boiling Rock, after all. Zuko stood up abruptly, preparing to make immediate orders for the release of all political prisoners and a copy of the prisoner records in the last month, but as he did so, the scrolls he'd been perusing fell to the ground with a clatter.

Their sound brought him back into his reality, and Zuko stiffened for a moment before making his choice. Sighing, he sat back down again, replacing the scrolls on the desk and looking at the other papers he had to go through. Most likely, he'd find the prisoner records here, anyway... just another thing for him to check over. But more importantly, he had to attend to this work first anyway. This entire, fragile peace and the unsure aftermath ahead of him likely rested at least partially on how quickly he was able to recall all of his units, and so that was what he had to focus on now.

He breathed. Mai, and his own guilt about that, could wait. Zuko raised his hand and pushed aside the economic scrolls, before digging through the rest of the piles with a resigned sigh.

It was only when he was half way through that he remembered the scroll, remembered Shen Li's eyebrow and the unspoken disapproval in his voice. Zuko's head shot up, and his eyes went immediately to drawers beside the desk.

It was there.

Zuko felt a curious mix of relief and annoyance as he reached towards it. It looked so innocuous sitting there... he was hardly surprised that he hadn't noticed it for the past day. Still, if there was one lesson that Zuko had learnt well, it was that looks were deceiving.

He lifted the ribbon, took a cursory glance at the seal, and then melted it open with his fingertips carefully. Laying the still-imprinted wax on the wood, he unrolled it slowly.

There were no words. That was the first thing that he realised. There were only lines and dots, swirls that joined together to form an indiscernible picture. Zuko stared at it, before smoothing it down onto his desk to look at it properly. Now that he could see it in its entirety, he saw that the outermost line snaked around the most of the scroll like a demented border, with a smaller line encompassing only one corner and finishing there. Inside the first shape, there were more lines, some sharp like rivers, others cut like spiky mountains. It took him a moment to realise that that was exactly what they were.

Zuko frowned and stepped back as far as he could without letting the scroll roll back up into itself. So it was a map, geography of some kind... but what exactly did that mean?

He froze.

Agni, he was stupid.

Zuko spun around and slapped the scroll to the floor, not caring anymore about caution. He pressed one knee to its bottom and reached his hand out to pin it at the top. The spread-out diagram lay flat against the larger, blood-coloured map on the floor, and Zuko felt a rush of energy hit his stomach.

He'd been right.

The scroll he lay pressed on was a roughly sketched picture of the Weiji coast, a small province nestled to the far south-east of the Fire Nation Capital, perhaps a few days' travel away.

Zuko flicked his eyes to the map on the floor, and then back to the scroll with a frown. If that were true, that would mean that the smaller shape that extended past the corner had to be an Earth Kingdom Peninsula. Both maps were scattered with small pockets of dots, and Zuko wasn't sure what to make of them until his eyes fell on the soldier figurines.

Of course.

Zuko shifted, and the bottom of the scroll rolled up to hit his fingers. Spreading it out again, he let his eyes flash from one picture to the next, each time confirming the growing fear in his gut.

An army.

Of Fire Nation soldiers.

Almost on his doorstep.

And even though it would only be two days before he was crowned as Fire Lord... Zuko was somehow vehemently sure that whoever these men followed, it sure as hell wasn't him.

* * *

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Hmm... took me this long to actually get the plot thickening. Maybe that should tell me something. Ah well... anyway, I do hope you enjoyed this. If you did (and if you didn't! Constructive criticism/helpful suggestions are always good!), please press that little button down there and leave me a review! It can be anything... a few lines of encouragement, an essay or paragraph constructively critiquing my writing, a shared squee for how awesome Avatar is... just let me know, and you'll make a lonely fanfic writer happy (and also make her write faster). :)


	6. Before You Leap

**Chapter 6: Before You Leap**

Disclaimer: Mike and Bryan, the show's creators, own Avatar: The Last Airbender, completely. I'm only showing my love of their world by playing in it.

A/N I: And it's back! Despite three assignments due in this week, two presentations due in next week, and a bucketload of contracts readings... I've managed to get this chapter up. :D I think it's partially because I've found that I love playing with this world so much, and also because you've all kept me brightened up throughout this week with your awesome reviews and support... so thanks to all of you who reviewed, and all of you who are still with me. I hope you enjoy!

* * *

Lose your compass, shred your map,

The path that's straight can always swing,

And hold on tight before you leap,

'Cos destiny's a funny thing.

* * *

"Good. Just the man I wanted."

Shen Li paused in the doorway, his hand half extended to knock. Fire bubbled warmly in the fireplace to the left, casting an unneeded glow across the study. Directly across from the door, a floor-length window let in the half-risen sun. And amidst it all, Prince Zuko sat in the lotus position, his face downturned towards the map on the floor. His unmarked eye lay soft and closed across his cheek, and to his side, the combination of dawn and flame lent the room an unearthly shine. To one entering in from the corridor, it was almost as if the heavens themselves were blessing the Fire Nation.

Shen Li sighed, and stepped over the threshold. If only things were that simple.

"What's on your mind, Prince Zuko?" he asked, careful to keep his voice expressionless.

The Fire Prince's eyes opened. "Too much," he replied caustically, before rising to his feet. The guard captain barely had time to blink before a familiar-looking scroll was shoved into his hand. "What do you make of this?"

Shen Li thumbed the paper carefully, well aware of how intensely Prince Zuko's golden eyes were boring into his skin. Although he already knew every detail of its contents, he took a second to stare. There was no harm in re-checking his memory, after all.

"It looks like the Weiji Cloast and the tip of the Earth Kingdom Peninsula, your highness."

The Fire Prince muttered something under his breath and turned away. "I thought so too," he replied at last. "But what really bothers me are the soldiers."

Zuko gestured towards his desk, and Shen Li's eyes followed. Whatever one could say of the Prince. he _had_ been making progress. "According to my reports, those soldiers don't exist. Or more importantly, they shouldn't be there. Either way, I'm not sure what to make of it."

Shen Li gritted his teeth and bowed his head. _But it's so obvious_, he felt like saying. _Come on, don't make me have to spell it out to you..._

"Still," the Prince faced the window, his hands clasped behind his back. "If the scroll is correct, something tells me that these 'non-existent' troops aren't friendly. And with such a well-placed position, I think we have a very real reason to worry."

Shen Li expelled a breath he hadn't known he'd been holding. _Ah, good. _The Fire Prince wasn't stupid. At the thought, he inhaled again and tried to calm himself. _Why am I so jumpy? This will work out fine. I made the right choice. My nation will be okay. _

His thoughts were cut off when his leader spoke again. "But that brings me to the question," Prince Zuko turned abruptly. "Where did you get the scroll in the first place?"

The guard captain swallowed. "It came alongside General Iroh's message, actually. Since the two messenger hawks both came from the Earth Kingdom, I... assumed they were both addressed to you, given the recent events."

He watched as Prince Zuko's lips thinned, and decided the boy would make an imposing monarch. Even now, draped in only a heavy robe that barely covered his sleeping clothes, the Prince cut a strong figure. Shen Li's eyes travelled upwards. The scar helped. The scar definitely helped, and the surge of memories that accompanied the sight quelled any last worries in Shen Li's mind. He'd made his choice four years ago, at the Agni Kai arena. And now that it was the Avatar and his friends who had won, the Prince included... he was glad that he'd made that choice.

Shen Li felt the ghost of a wind passing over his face, a remembered breath of a poisoned dart sailing high and reaching for the Prince's chest. Yes. He hadn't made the wrong decision. The boy in front of him... oh, who was he kidding? He was almost the same age, after all.

No. The young man in front of him would make a great Fire Lord.

"Shen Li?"

The guard captain slipped back into focus with a blink. Oh. Right. And just how had he missed the annoyed stare the Fire Prince had been directing his way for the last minute? He shook his head. _Concentrate, you fool. _

"I apologise, Prince Zuko. What did you say?"

The Prince in question huffed irritably through his teeth. "I _said_ that I'm still not sure whether we can trust this scroll. We don't know where it came from. That the hawk flew from the Earth Kingdom doesn't exactly narrow it down. The Earth Kingdom _does_ happen to be a fairly large place."

Shen Li cleared his throat. "If you don't mind, Prince Zuko, might I suggest something?"

The Prince chuckled dryly. "Shen Li, I've known you for two days now, and this has to be the first time you've _asked_ to give me advice."

He snorted inwardly. "I apologise, my Prince. Should I do it more often?"

His sardonicism was wasted. Prince Zuko wasn't listening, or perhaps he was. Suddenly, Shen Li felt very uncomfortable. Piercing, searching stares he could take. But this sudden softness? What exactly was happening? He didn't even realise he was backing away unconsciously, until the movement seemed to snap the Fire Prince back to his senses. Before his eyes, the almost open look in the other's gaze clammed tightly shut, and then he shook his head. "Sorry," he muttered. "I... it's just that you reminded me so much of someone just then."

Shen Li's heart fell to the bottom of his chest, but he kept his face still. "Who?"

"Mai..." the Fire Prince murmured, and then his golden eyes shot open. "Mai! Of course! I can't believe I almost forgot, _again_!"

"Forgot what, Prince Zuko?"

His robes swirling around him, Prince Zuko turned back towards his desk without answering. "Shen Li? I need you to look through the prisoner records and start releasing everyone who's a war prisoner. Well, perhaps not everyone. Run the list by me before you authenticate it. But while you're there, I have a slightly more important task for you to do."

He exhaled, and then looked up at the guard captain again. "I need you to find Mai."

Shen Li didn't betray any emotion. "The Governor of Omashu's daughter?"

A grim smile slipped across Prince Zuko's face. "Yeah, that's the one."

_What had GeneraL Iroh said? That he never thought things through? _Shen Li paused and coughed. "Uh... I'm afraid that there's a small problem with that plan."

The Fire Prince halted, his hands halfway extended to gather a scroll. "Huh?"

Shen Li repressed a grin. "I'm just a simple guard captain, your Highness," he explained. "I don't have the power to request prisoner records, let alone go around freeing them."

"Oh."

Shen Li smiled ironically. "Oh indeed."

Prince Zuko glanced briefly at the scroll in his hand and then looked up again. "Well, that's a problem that can be easily fixed," he said confidently. "In two days time, when I'm crowned Fire Lord, you'll be promoted to Chief Bodyguard anyway. Just tell the servants that due to our extenuating circumstances, you've been given some of your powers already."

He turned away, satisfied that that would fix it, and so he missed the first, real expression cross his guard captain's face.

Shock.

_Chief Bodyguard. Does he... _Shen Li stared at his leader's back. It was curved slightly underneath the robe, but he didn't need to see skin to know the youth and the fighter underneath. _Does he know what he's asking? Know what he's doing? So soon?_

He cleared his throat, and couldn't believe it when his voice cracked. "Your highness..."

The Fire Prince paused, his hands resting still on the papers he'd been shuffling just a moment ago. "We're not in public now, Shen Li. Prince Zuko will do just fine." He smiled wryly to himself as he turned. "In fact, 'Zuko' will do when we're alone. You've earned..."

There was a thud.

Zuko stopped abruptly.

If Shen Li had been able to see his leader's face now, he might have been surprised by the emotions that ran freely across it. The last few days had been enough to shake Zuko back into his upbringing, into a world of politics and paranoia and neutral expressions that couldn't betray you. Even when he'd been young, Zuko had been exposed to that world. Of course, he'd never learnt completely to dampen his eyes when he was happy, or to lift the sullenness back to passivity when he was depressed. He'd been too young. Just a boy.

But the Fire Prince certainly wasn't a boy any longer.

"Shen Li," he said roughly. "Get up."

From where he knelt, his face to the ground and his arms reached forwards, the guard captain trembled. But it wasn't from fear. It was from a strange sense of awe, a rush that had seized his heart and burst outwards from there to grab his muscles and pull him down. "Your highness..."

"_Zuko_," the Prince said. "And what's wrong with you? I told you to get up."

Shen Li wasn't sure whether it was fear or annoyance, or perhaps a mix of both, that echoed in Prince Zuko's voice. But it was enough to get his mind working again, and so the guard captain steeled his breath and sank lower to the floor, his eyes still resolutely on his leader's feet.

_What's wrong with me? More things than I thought I knew. But this is enough. This is enough to make me never regret it..._

"Your highness, I am just a lowly guard captain. What would make you trust me? And with Chief Bodyguard? I..." he took a deep breath, afraid that he was rambling. "You've known me for two days, your highness. And I know you don't like me. Why...?

There was a silence, and Shen Li felt the heat of the fire crackling to his left increase. He caught his breath, but before he knew it the searing had died down again to a gentle warmth, and his mind registered the coolness of the floor seeping through his palms. The words were out, and he couldn't take them back. He was surprised at how easily he could accept that, now that he was calm. In the end, it was up to Prince Zuko. It always had been.

"Get up."

It was a command this time, and Shen Li instinctively scrambled to obey. He had only gotten a few inches, however, before a firm hand grasped the collar of his shirt and pulled him roughly to his feet. The guard captain kept his eyes to the floor, and so he missed the look that flashed across Prince Zuko's face. Not that he would have understood it, of course, since he hadn't been privy to the Fire Prince's nightmare. Still, by the time he falteringly raised his head to meet the gaze of his leader, there were a few traces of starkness left, and he almost cringed away from them before catching himself. _What the hell is wrong with me? I... calm down. I am Shen Li, of the Royal Fire Nation guard. I am an honourable man. There's nothing wrong. Nothing. _

His eyes slid to the side, to catch the dancing flames of the fireplace and avoid the piercing ones of the Prince. "I... apologise, your highness," he said softly. "I don't know what came over me."

There was a silence as Zuko studied him, and then the Fire Prince released his grip. "I understand if you don't feel like you can talk to me," he said, his voice surprisingly gentle amidst the roughness of his tone. "You're right. We've only known each other for a short amount of time, it's understandable."

He paused for a moment, as if searching for the right words to say next, and Shen Li found himself almost inexplicably holding his breath.

Golden eyes flashed down, and then flashed up again. "But you're also wrong. It's not that I don't like you. It's just that I didn't trust you."

Shen Li was glad that he was looking away, so that the Fire Prince couldn't see the tightening of his features. "I understand," he said emotionlessly, even though he didn't. Because why then, was he doing this? From guard captain to Chief Bodyguard... it couldn't even rightfully be called a promotion. It was far too much for that. And even though Shen Li had known this was coming, had expected it even after Iroh and everything else that had occurred, the fact that it was happening so quickly was still a shock.

"No, you don't," Prince Zuko said patiently, and then he stepped to the side so that the guard captain was forced to look at him. "I said that I didn't trust you. That was before. But Uncle Iroh and your own actions have proved it enough for me." A small smile curled ironically across the Prince's face. "You saved my life. I don't forget favours like that quickly."

Shen Li shook his head in disbelief. "I was just doing my job."

The look the Prince shot back at him told him that he wasn't buying it for a moment. "Of course," he said ironically. "Because ferrying messages is a guard captain's job. Because giving strategic and political advice is a guard captain's job. Because standing to my right, enduring those meetings with me, and then telling me which Minister you thought was lying when is a guard captain's job."

Shen Li shook his head again, but this time it was slower. Well, at least the new ruler was _definitely_ not stupid. "I _am_ the Minister for Security's son," he said.

The Prince waved a hand dismissively. "That makes you even more suited for the job I'm planning to give you." A sudden realisation crossed his face. "Unless you have any objections?"

Shen Li sucked in a breath. "No, not at all, your highness. I was just... surprised."

"Be sure that you aren't from now on," Prince Zuko said dryly. "It might make things a little uncomfortable, given your new position."

The guard captain let a sardonic twist catch his mouth. "Of course," he said, and then his eyes widened. "That reminds me. I came here to remind you that you're expected in the War Chamber at ten for the Ministers' gathering."

"Ah," the Prince glanced at the sky. gauging his time. Pale fingers found his robe, and he pulled it closer across his sleeping clothes as he headed towards the door. "So I've got around three hours for some Firebending practice, breakfast, and catching up with the Avatar."

Shen Li nodded, both his face and his emotions under control again. "Very good, your highness."

It was as if the words themselves had drawn him up short, but then again, Shen Li supposed they had. The Fire Prince swung around again. "Zuko," he enunciated slowly. "In private, let it be Zuko."

He had just enough time to nod and open his mouth, before thought crossed the other's face and he was speaking again.

"Oh, and Shen Li? I've already decided what to do about the scroll," Prince Zuko paused, as if thinking it over, before nodding sharply. "We'll send a small dispatch of scouts out to the area. An army of that size should be difficult to hide, let alone feed and water."

Shen Li felt his lips twitch. "Is that all, Pr... Zuko?"

He didn't even pause. "Yes, that's all," he said, before he walked confidently from the room.

And behind him, Shen Li finally let a small, real, smile creep across his face, the first he'd worn since he'd laid eyes on Prince Zuko two days ago and found himself staring at a different person from the one who'd left.

Perhaps... perhaps optimism could be justified. Perhaps his long held hope would be given life. His eyes drifted to the back of the retreating Fire Prince.

Perhaps... perhaps it would even be in this lifetime that the Fire Nation regained its honour. It was a heady thought, and it kept Shen Li smiling all the way down the corridor...

... until he remembered the task Prince Zuko had assigned him.

* * *

Unsurprisingly, Zuko blitzed through Firebending practice, shocking the old teachers who had observed him for so long. It was like a different person had come back, they whispered amongst themselves. From a boy, into a man. Because how else could they explain his control? His precision? His... _mastery_? The boy had always been shown up by his sister, that was true. But even when he had returned briefly after the fall of Ba Sing Se, they remembered his characteristic lack of control. True, he had certainly improved. What was to be expected, when one battled the Avatar on an almost weekly basis? But then there had still been faults, flaws, and weaknesses...

But now, he truly looked the part of a Fire Lord. The teachers who had doubted him walked away whispering when he was finished, and Zuko let a small smile of victory lighten his face for a moment.

It felt good.

By the time he'd finished breakfast as well, and gone over a few more documents, he only had about half an hour left to find Aang. He wandered down the corridor, pausing when he found the right door. Reaching up, he knocked softly, and when there was no reply, he frowned and pulled the door open.

For a moment, he thought the room was empty. Zuko cast a sharp glance across his field of vision, his ears still ringing from his unanswered knocks. When his eyes finally settled on the small, hunched figure on the floor he exhaled in relief, irony tingeing his breath. What had he been worried about? He was good at looking for the Avatar.

Aang sat in the middle of the carpet, his arms linked loosely around his knees and his shoulders slumped in defeat. Gray eyes stared out the floor-length window, taking in the view of the Fire Palace's gardens, and then the city beyond. It seemed peaceful enough, the greenery beautiful as always, but Zuko felt the inherent uneasiness as he stepped in and closed the door behind him. It was enough for the clamouring voices to cease in his blood, for the adrenaline to ebb away, and he almost forgot the missive clutched in his fist as he approached his... friend.

His friend, the Avatar.

"Aang?" he said hesitantly, uncertainty husking his voice. "Are you all right?"

The Avatar didn't reply. Momo chittered nervously, swooping off from where he'd been perching on Aang's slumped shoulders and hovering in the air before Zuko. The Fire Prince saw anxiety in the little lemur's movements and walked forwards. The Avatar and his pet had seemed nearly inseparable lately, ever since they'd both vanished off together. He wondered why, but that thought was pushed off to the side as he moved closer, until the young Airbender was at his feet and they shared the same view.

Silence drenched them, and it stripped him of his words. Zuko opened his mouth and closed it, then without thinking, he slipped the scroll that had troubled him back into his robes. It could wait. Something was up, and as he remembered yesterday and the events leading up to Shen Li bursting in with news of the uprising, he realised with a sinking heart that he had a very good idea of what it was.

Slowly, the Fire Prince settled himself down next to the Avatar, his posture slightly more relaxed. Pulling his legs into a cross, Zuko leant his elbows onto his knees and stared out past the grass to his people. Something told him that Aang would talk when he was ready, and until then, he could wait.

With a patience born from finding his path, from having it all finally end, and from forgetting the fact that he had a meeting in half an hour with a nest of vipers who hated the very air he breathed, Zuko waited. His eyes never left his city, but he was ever aware of the faint crease on Aang's brow, the line that marred his young skin. A few years more of that and Aang would look older than he should.

Then again, he was no ordinary twelve year old.

"Zuko, what exactly happened here two days ago?"

Zuko started, and his eyes moved to his friend. Aang hadn't shifted, his eyes still focused somewhere far away, past the Fire Nation gardens, the city, and off to the thin rim of blue that circled the horizon. If it hadn't been for Momo's silent swoop back to Aang's shoulders, Zuko wouldn't have been sure whether he'd said anything at all.

"What did Katara tell you?" he asked, hesitance colouring his voice.

With the mention of her name, the Avatar moved. His childlike, innocent eyes hardened and a sharp burst of wind lifted him up to stand on his feet. "Nothing. Nothing more than what you all saw yesterday."

Zuko winced, and remembered the scene, remembered Aang's accusing eyes, Katara's intervention, and then the fight. That last memory irked him somewhat. They'd had a good day, one of relief and friendship and the simple exultation in the feeling that they were all alive and had won. For it to have ended like it had...

Not that he'd blamed either of them... although to be honest, though, he'd been a little irate at Aang. If only he could have been there. If only he could have seen the anguish in her eyes and heard the crackling of lightning and fire searing the air. If only he could have been there in the aftermath, when they'd come to carry his sister away and then Katara had broken down and collapsed, weeping. Zuko's chest tightened at the memory, at the image of one of the strongest people he knew like that. But still, it hadn't weakened her in the slightest. It had been twice now that she'd cried in front of him. And both times, his opinion of her had never fallen.

Zuko sighed and glanced again at Aang's frustrated face and stubbornly set mouth. He wished the Avatar could have been there after. Then again, perhaps not. It had been enough... it had been amazing, actually, that he'd managed to pull her to a place where they wouldn't be disturbed, where they'd waited for the world around them to become less crazy. Where she'd let the tears flow, where they'd let silence bring their sanity back, piece by piece. And then they had talked, haltingly at first, and...

Zuko shook his head and got back on track. The last he remembered of her was seeing the devastation behind the rage as she and the Avatar had fought, and then Shen Li had run in. But after that, after all of that, they'd all gone to bed. And between then and now, when the sun was climbing ever higher, Zuko was surprised that nothing more had happened.

"So you haven't seen her since...?" he asked.

"She wasn't in her room this morning," Aang sat down again abruptly, and then the hardness was gone from him. He loosened and fell inwards instead, a strange despondency settling over him. "I looked everywhere for her. And she wasn't at breakfast either. And Toph wouldn't say a thing!" the indignation that suddenly flared in his voice almost made Zuko chuckle, but he swallowed it with a firm mouth. He was fairly certain that for once, that Avatar didn't need laughter, and so he settled himself down. This was going to take a while.

"You don't need to worry about her safety, if that's what you're concerned about," he said. "She's probably down at the infirmary," a shadow passed his own face at that, and he sat up straighter. "Before you came back, she barely left the place. I think she's trying to make it better." _Whether or not that will._ He paused and cocked his head, studying his friend. "Do you want me to take you to her?"

At that, every last bit of tension drained out of the Avatar's body and he collapsed onto the floor, stretching out until his head rested on his folded arms. "I don't know. Maybe I need more time to think. What am I thinking? I'm such an idiot."

The Fire Prince folded his arms and looked directly at his friend. He had a very good idea what the problem was, and going around in circles certainly wasn't solving it. "Aang, what exactly is wrong?"

The Avatar waited for a while before he answered. "It's not just... it's not just that she killed Azula," he said haltingly, as if saying the words themselves pained him. "I... I think the fight was building up before that anyway, back at Ember Island when all of your were just... arrgh..."

Zuko kept his face implacable. "Well, we didn't know about spirit-bending then, did we?" _And I still have mixed feelings about you letting him live... no! I can't say that, he's my father._

_Even if he never really acted like it..._

Zuko took a breath, shaken, and was glad when Aang didn't seem to notice. The Avatar merely scowled. "Well, it still didn't help, whatever you were trying to do."

The Fire Prince opened his mouth to bite off a sharp retort, but then with a supreme effort he quieted, unwilling to let the emotions inside him speak now. He had a feeling that if he did open the floodgates and allow the bitterness and the resentment still trapped inside him to surface, it would sound far too much like hatred for his liking.

"Well, what's done is done," he finally sighed, running his hand through his hair. He'd have to put that up later for the meeting. "We can't go back and change it, no matter how much we might like to." _And I'm not just talking about Azula. _

Aang sobered and let his eyes travel out through the window again, to the very real, harsh beauty of the Fire Nation. "I know that. I _know_ that. And yet, I'm still angry at her. Because I was so happy that I managed to do it, you know?"

The Avatar turned to the Fire Prince, and Zuko saw the moment that the veil dropped away and his friend let the truth shine out.

"Fighting your father was the hardest thing I'd ever done in my life," Aang said soberly, his honesty both searing and soothing to Zuko's ears. "I spent the entire time holding back until the end, when it finally made sense. And I was so _happy_. I was free. I was myself, both Avatar and Aang, because I managed to stop it without more death. Without not being myself."

He paused, and his gray eyes hardened infinitesimally. "And then I find out it was all for nothing, because Katara killed Azula."

Zuko sighed and covered his eyes. Why him? "Aang, you didn't see her at the end," he tried to keep his voice as reasonable as possible. "Azula... she went insane, I think. And I don't mean insane like she normally was, I mean properly insane. As she was... if she'd lived... I think we would have had to chain her up for the rest of her life, just to keep her from hurting herself or anyone else. And I don't know about you, but I think that Azula would have almost preferred this..."

It was the truth, but the suddenly livid look on Aang's face didn't mean he couldn't regret it. "WHAT?!" Aang erupted, turning around so fast Zuko had to slide back to avoid being hit. "How can you say that, Zuko?! She was your sister!"

The Fire Prince's eyes flashed. "I'm well aware of that, Aang! And because of that, I know that for one, I would have rather died than be chained up for the rest of my life! Died with honour! She got that, all right? You weren't there, you couldn't see..."

Zuko buried his face in his hands. _She was my sister, and before it turned out this way we played with each other on the beach. _ "I would have stopped it if I could," he said quietly.

"Then why didn't you?" Aang asked accusingly.

It was Zuko's turn to swing on his friend angrily. "Well, there was the minor issue of me having a hole burnt in my chest from Azula's lightning, but since you're the Avatar, I guess something little like that wouldn't have concerned you!"

Aang's eyes widened. "Oh."

"Yeah," Zuko snapped. "Oh."

Aang softened, and then his face creased a little, the corners of his eyes wrinkling in frustration. "I know... I'm sorry, Zuko. I guess... I just can't help it. I'm still angry, but this isn't between you and me. I'll have to clear it up with Katara."

Zuko nodded slowly, pushing the anger away. As it ebbed from his mind, thought replaced it, and he suddenly remembered something. "Wait, you said you weren't angry just because of Azula. What else is wrong?"

As soon as he said the words, he wished that his curiosity could have been muffled briefly for once by good sense. He didn't really want to get involved with whatever was happening... he had enough on his plate, after all.

Still, he remembered Katara's eyes when she'd told him, in those hours after the fight. And so he steeled himself. Whether or not he wanted it, after all he'd done... he could at least try to help.

"It's... nothing much, really," Aang muttered, and the sound drew Zuko's attention back to the present. A faint blush stained the Avatar's rounded cheeks as he stared off into the distance. "I... it's just..."

He took a deep breath. "I'minlovewithKatarabutshesaidshewasconfused."

Zuko raised his eyebrow and mimed a rush of air going over his head. "What?"

Aang's blush deepened, and suddenly he wasn't the all-powerful Avatar in control of himself and all four elements, he was just a little boy again. "I'm in love with Katara but she said she was confused..." he repeated in a mumble, before his eyes went thoughtful. "Then again, she said she was only confused because it wasn't a good time, like, we were in the middle of a war... perhaps now it's over it'll be all right?"

Zuko didn't dare say anything. Aang continued, oblivious, his bald head furrowing. "But then again, I don't understand. How can this stuff be confusing?"

Again, Zuko said nothing, but the reprieve was short-lived. Aang suddenly turned to him, hopeful. "Zuko! I remember Sokka saying you had a girlfriend. So you've been in love. Tell me, how can you ever be confused?"

Zuko swallowed, trapped. "Well... uh... that's a little complicated."

Aang huffed in frustration. "That can't be right! Love isn't complicated! You either love or you don't. There's no in-between!"

Zuko looked away from his friend's eager face. Despite being the Avatar, it was amazing how naive he still could be. Then again, he reflected wryly, it wasn't as if he himself could talk.

"It's... complicated," he repeated slowly. "But I do care for her."

Aang looked at him, puzzled. "How can she be your girlfriend if you don't love her?"

Zuko shook his head and didn't answer. It wasn't the time for a long-winded explanation about Ba Sing Se, and what had happened afterwards... just how Mai and he had gotten together. He didn't even want to think about it, because he couldn't. Not without feeling a guilt that tightened his throat and clawed painfully at his conscience. Because even if he wasn't sure, was too... _afraid_ of the word love, he knew that he definitely didn't hate her. He knew that he cared.

"It's a long story," he said when the words came to him. "And somehow, I don't really think I'm the best person to be asking." _What with my family history and all. Love? What love? _"I mean, I did break up with her."

Aang wasn't having any of it. "Still, I'm sure you've felt it. You must have! I mean, love to me just doesn't seem like an uncertain thing. It feels... warm, and, and beautiful, and... safe..."

_Safe... _an image of an elegant, graceful woman rose into his mind and Zuko suddenly felt an aching yearning rise in his heart, so strong that he thought for a moment he might suffocate._ Mother._ He swallowed and looked down at the floor. _Yes_, he thought through the pain. _This is love. A different kind, but love nonetheless..._

When he could finally speak again, his voice came out with a rasp. "You're right," he said with conviction. ""When you love somebody, you know it."

It was as if the words had confirmed something in Aang's mind, and he wasn't sure whether it was good or bad. A mixed look twisted the Avatar's face for a moment, but then determination suddenly blazed from his eyes. "Well maybe she does," he muttered to himself. "She danced with me, after all. And she healed me. And, and... it's _Katara_," his voice softened. "She's always been there for me. Always."

Zuko squirmed uneasily. This was private stuff, and he felt like he shouldn't be here. "Perhaps," he said uncomfortably, looking for an escape. Amazingly, he found one, and his eyes widened as he realised just how good it was.

"Agni! I just remembered We have to get to the War Chamber for the Ministerial Meeting!" Zuko leapt to his feet and tugged the fastenings of his armour a little tighter. "Come on, we'd better hurry or else..."

He paused suddenly, when he realised that his friend wasn't listening to him anymore. "Aang?"

"You go ahead," the Avatar straightened, a purposeful glint in his eyes. "I'll catch up later."

_After I find Katara._ The words hung in there between them, and Zuko bit his lip. Despite how much he knew that Aang needed to be there, needed to see the reality of the world they were dealing with even after the war had ended... he couldn't begrudge his friend this either.

"Don't be too long," he finally said, before turning on his heel and walking towards the Chamber that had once led to his scar.

* * *

Mai flicked an eye open and wished there was a window. Then again, since the cells were not particularly designed for prisoner comfort, she wished that there was far more than that. Still, she would have liked a window. Even if she wasn't able to open it, she could have at least imagined a breeze on her cheek, or the sun on her face.

Mai opened her eyes completely and took in the stone and dirt of the place. Then she sighed, looked away, and closed them again.

Sometimes, it was impossible to imagine, impossible to forget... there was nothing left but the waiting. Because Mai knew that this couldn't be forever. If she'd given in to that nightmare, she would have tried to run a long, long time ago.

With the thought of freedom, it did not take long before another memory began creeping in. The girl abruptly turned to her side and curled her fingers slightly, her body following suit.

Freedom. Along with it came the memory of what had landed her here in the first place, and she greeted it with mixed feelings. Despite the ambiguity that settled in her chest when she regarded it, however, she sometimes felt as if she liked this memory the best of all. Yes, it was painful, but painful like pins and needles in their heralding of life flowing back into a deadened limb. She had felt so alive fighting at the gondola tower. The corner of her mouth quirked up in the minutiae of a smile. For all his faults, for all the hurt... she could at least honestly credit Zuko for that moment. For giving her something real to fight for. Something that had made her blood race through her veins, had made her a little bit highstrung, a little bit crazy. And that rush of feeling had tasted so, so sweet.

Mai closed her eyes and felt her lashes sweep against her skin. If she tried, she could recapture a little of that fire now. She'd begun to train herself to do it, a little at a time, beckoning it forth for a moment and then sending it back, letting it work its magic against the tedium that snapped at her heels.

How it felt to fight.

How it felt to fight for something.

How it felt to fight for something _real_,

It wasn't as if Mai had never fought before; oh no... she'd fought Azula's battles too many times to count. But it had been different, then. Under Azula's command, Mai had never fought for her own sake, she'd fought because it was expected, because Azula was her friend.

Up at the gondola tower, it had been different.

_I love Zuko more than I fear you._ The words rebounded in her head and she smiled at the rush they gave her. It was funny how truth and lies could blend so seamlessly into a single sentence. Fear was not something that Mai thought about often. But she knew that it had been there, under her skin and waiting in her bloodstream. Mai did not doubt that Azula could extend the little cruel manipulations she had dealt in when she was younger, but at the Boiling Rock that had ceased to matter. Fear had always been about the consequences of failure and staying with Azula. The path she had taken had led to such a clean break that the consequences had rappelled up to life and death, and at that moment, Mai had been more than willing to accept those terms.

Not without adding a few more of her own, though, using her words to sever the ties as neatly as her knives had pinned her enemies.

"_You miscalculated..."_

Mai's memories halted at that, her normally impassive face suddenly struck. Azula had miscalculated, true. But then, so had she.

Because Ty Lee had done something that she'd never been able to do before.

Surprise her.

Then again, surprise was too light a word for exactly what had happened. Mai had been prepared to fight her childhood friend at the moment to the death, most likely her own, and she'd simply trusted Ty Lee to stay out of it.

So much for that.

Mai rolled over again and pressed her face into the pillow. When that didn't help, she sat up abruptly. That turned out to be a mistake as dizziness pressed in on her scalp and left the world whirling across her vision in disorienting spots. The thin girl scowled as she placed her hand on her forehead and leaned against its coolness. She didn't like to acknowledge it, but every time she saw Ty Lee in the exercise yard, something painful caught in her chest. Imprisonment was not agreeing with her friend. The bubble and spark that had so characterised her personality had dimmed somewhat. It didn't seem so on the outside; Ty Lee still laughed, still giggled, still walked on her hands and curved bridges on the ground, but Mai had known her for so long it would have been impossible for her to miss the signs. The slightest deflation of the acrobat's shoulders. The gradual dissolving of the cheery twinkle in her eyes.

It was funny, how she could read Ty Lee so well...

... and how she couldn't read Zuko at all.

The thought was painful, and Mai was almost grateful when the sharp clanging of the bell rang through the prison and shook her from her thoughts. Slowly she rose to her feet and waited for the guards open the doors. Her scowl deepened as the bell kept ringing. She'd been in here long enough now to distinguish the messages, and to be honest, she couldn't care less if there was an emergency requiring them all to meet in the yard. It couldn't be anything interesting, after all.

At least she'd get to see Ty Lee.

When she followed the stream of prisoners into the courtyard, Mai was quashed down the slight flicker of curiosity that arose. Guards were centred around the walls, as was to be expected when you gathered everyone into one place. But it was the way that they were fidgeting, playing with their helmets and straightening their armour, that convinced her that something truly unusual was occurring. Her thin lips pulled into a frown as she scanned the crowd. Normally she would have looked for pink, but that was impossible now with their shapeless, matching clothes. So she looked for a braid instead, and for the lightness and grace that only her friend could possess. And of course, with her luck, it was just when she'd spotted her friend that her Uncle shouted and the prisoners automatically stilled.

Mai cursed silently. Perhaps she could surreptitiously move while still listening. But her eyes travelled up automatically to look at the figure standing on the balcony, even as she began to pick her way around the people.

Her uncle had gotten thinner, more haggard. His enemies had always thought that he'd crumble and fall after the escape that had cost him his honour so dearly, but despite it all he still stood strong as he addressed the crowd. Mai let a small smile escape her mouth as she stared up at him. Out of everyone in their family, he was the most like her. They were both strong. And despite what everyone else thought, it would take a lot for them to be broken.

"Now listen, you lot, and listen well! Some important news has come from the mainland, some _very _important news..." he paused and cleared his throat, before continuing. His harsh voice rung across the stone. "Two days ago, by decree of Fire Prince Zuko, the War was officially announced over!"

For a moment, there was a stunned silence. After a century, after all of their lifetimes... it was over just like that? Through mere words?

And then there was a roar.

It grew solidly, from the bottom of Fire Nation lungs, _fire comes from the breath, _and Mai felt herself get swept up in it even as she stayed voiceless, shrunken into herself. Prisoners chanted, prisoners screamed, the sound stemming from both good and ill feelings at the news, but the sound was mere background to the name that she heard. The words rang across her skull, imprinted deep into her memory, and it stayed there even as the roar crescendoed. Fire Prince Zuko. Prince Zuko. Zuko.

The words and their implications were still echoing in her mind when she found her way to Ty Lee. Two days ago. Two days. Two days ago, something had happened that had brought Zuko back into his position. Two days. Two whole _days_, forty-eight hours...

Mai shook her head angrily, feeling hated emotion claw at her chest. He should have gotten them out by now. She knew Zuko... or perhaps she didn't. But one thing she did know about the angry, confused, roiling boy that she'd dated for those brief months between the fall of Ba Sing Se and the Eclipse was that when he wanted to, he acted and acted fast.

Her heart, which she'd thought had sustained so much pain it couldn't be crushed anymore, squeezed a little tighter...

... and then a hand was on her shoulder, and Ty Lee was there. And with a start, Mai realised that it wasn't the husk of a girl who had been play-acting herself recently. It was Ty Lee again, bright, bouncy Ty Lee at the thought of freedom, and... "Mai! Mai! The war's over! The war's _over_! And if the war's over, then we'll be free soon! I _know_ we will!"

Perhaps it was the conviction with which she said it. But most likely, it was the way in which her gray eyes, dull and listless for so long beneath a fake glamour, shone so brightly with hope.

In the end, with Mai's still raw and newly opened feelings, it was impossible not to at least partially believe her. And that was why, even when she was taken away from her friend and escorted back to her cell, Lady Mai allowed herself a miniscule smile. One that stayed with her long after she laid her head back on her pillow and closed her eyes.

Still, if she'd known that freedom would only be hours away, her smile might have been wider.

Then again, if she'd known what was to come after that for her, for her country, and for the man she thought she loved... she probably wouldn't have smiled at all.

* * *

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A/N II: Phew! I think that's the longest chapter I've ever written... hope you all enjoyed it! However, I must say that I do feel that this isn't as polished as usual, but I can't place my finger on what exactly it is and how to fix it. If anyone can pick it up (or even if you just enjoyed it and want to see another chapter faster!) please do review and tell me! A girl only wants to get better (and also loves squee-ing when she gets reviews.) :)


	7. Locked

**Chapter 7: Locked**

Disclaimer: Mike and Bryan, the show's creators, own Avatar: The Last Airbender, completely. I'm only showing my love of their world by playing in it.

A/N I: Aaand I'm back, with another long one! Hope you all enjoy this chapter, and thanks again to all my lovely, lovely reviewers who give me such awesome feedback and encouragement. :)

* * *

_Peace is a river, that's locked in its roar,_

_The Self is a lover, tossed up on the shore,_

_Betrayal's a dagger, the sweetest of sins,_

_And fear is a nightmare, about to begin._

* * *

The room was cold when he entered, the sound of the hangings swishing closed behind him strangely loud in the sudden silence which greeted him. The messenger in front of him shivered, and then bowed as he proclaimed the customary signal. "Prince Zuko of the Fire Nation!"

It was not needed. Zuko's battle-trained ears had already heard the abrupt cease of mutterings seconds before he had crossed the threshold, and now as he strode through the center of the War Chamber, he felt their eyes eat through him as he passed. His shoes sounded heavy on the polished floor, his back was stiff and straight as he walked up to the awaiting empty throne. For a moment, time stretched in his mind as he stared at it. Despite its magnificence, the seat itself seemed to look so innocuous. And yet... only a few years ago, his father had sat in this seat, in the war meeting that had led to the scream of a young boy on a lonely Agni Kai arena. And only a few weeks ago he had sat himself at its side, half of him basking in the feel of Ozai's approval, the other half screaming in horror.

Zuko's heart hardened. And then, before the standing men, he turned.

With deliberate slowness, Prince Zuko lowered himself into the throne. A heartbeat passed, during which the Ministers and Advisors had time to draw in quiet gasps, before Zuko surrounded the royal seat with fire.

Azula had taken the throne before the coronation, Zuko knew that. But that was when Ozai had already proclaimed her heir, and had ascended himself. In meetings of state, however, it was rare that anyone other than a fully coronated Fire Lord took the throne; even Fire Lords-to-be were expected to sit in the smaller seat by its side. His deliberate act of forgoing custom and taking his place, rightful in all but tradition, was a calculated message, and he watched all of his nobles'

faces with an eagle-hawk's eye as they digested it. The ones who smiled slightly he would consider trusting, the ones who wavered he would watch, and the ones who remained impassive he would watch even closer.

And as Zuko sat, surrounded by the men who had served his father, he couldn't help but be all too aware of his popularity, or rather his lack of it. For too long his nation had known him as the banished, and then the traitor prince. Among his father's advisors and subjects, he would have to be doubly wary.

"Well?" he finally spoke, and the sound chased away the inheld breath in the chamber. "What have you to report?"

Everyone breathed, and then as custom dictated, the men re-seated themselves before the first to speak stood once more. Zuko's eyelids didn't flicker as he regarded the man. The Minister for Culture, Education and Citizenship was a neat, round-shaped man who was one of the few in the room who hadn't served in the army. He brought a sheaf of paper up to his eyes before clearing his throat.

"Well, the school system reforms that have been proposed recently have yet to be passed..."

Zuko brought the flame up higher, blocking them from his vision as he rubbed his eyes tiredly, preparing himself for a long wait. He'd forgotten how damn boring this stuff was. Then again, it was his fault that he'd called for a _general_ Ministerial meeting. He should have focused on the rebuilding instead. But still, he'd been away from the nexus of his country for so long, it felt right to know everything that had passed.

After the Minister for Culture, Education, and Citizenship had finished and sat down again, the Minister for Rural and Urban Development took his place. And then it was the Minister for Agriculture and Environment, then the Minister for Innovation, Science, Research and Transport... the details and the news flew thick and fast, and Zuko found himself struggling to retain and process it all. Finally, there were moments when the figures got so boring and pointless that he contented himself with surreptitiously studying the men in front of him.

The long table in the center of the room was actually divided into two, the larger half further away from him filled with his ministers, the four closest demarcated seats holding the three Royal Advisors and the Chief Advisor who presided over all of them as the Fire Prince's ostensible right-hand man and Treasurer. Zuko let his gaze rest on the old man for a long while, always making sure the flame distorted the air enough that none of them could pinpoint exactly where he was focusing his attention.

He remembered him from when he was a child, an austere old man who never raised his voice and never seemed to have an unduly harsh word to say. Even then he had been at Ozai's right hand side, a close confidante who exuded wisdom and power wherever he went. Zuko's eyes narrowed at that memory. No matter how kind or wise Chief Advisor Hui seemed, he would need to work a miracle to gain Zuko's trust after over a decade at Ozai's side.

At that, Zuko let his eyes sweep over the rest of his Ministers. If it came down to it, he would have been happy to get rid of all of them. They had served by Ozai for so long he was sure that they couldn't be trusted. Besides, he had seen them, seen their very nature over the few times that he'd been present in this hall. Subtle liars, cowed followers, proud arrogance. Very few, if any at all, would be loyal to him after he ascended. The mere thought made him wish again that he could start afresh... but he knew that the chaos and turmoil that would cause amongst the noble families would set back any efforts for peace for years. He pulled a face that none of them could see and settled back into the chair. That, or cause a coup or a civil war, and to be honest, he just wasn't ready for either. Zuko rubbed the bridge of his nose and tried to concentrate again. Agni, he wasn't even Fire Lord yet.

The current speaker, the Minister for Health and Human Services, finally took his seat again. Zuko blinked his eyes and tried to remember what the man had said, but found his thoughts somehow lost between "failing medical system" and "prepared influx of the wounded". He shot a glance at the Chief Advisor again, who caught his gaze and nodded slightly. Despite himself, Zuko relaxed a little. That nod, he knew, meant that there was nothing too much to worry. Then again, the fact that he'd suddenly found himself relying so instinctively on the benevolent old man quickly offset his relief.

Zuko sat up straighter as the announcer called for the Minister for Foreign Affairs. Paranoia. He was good at that.

The Minister for Foreign Affairs was a surprisingly humble-seeming man, given the arches of arrogance surrounding him. His craggy face was half-hidden by a grandfatherly beard, but his eyes sparked strong with the energy of one much younger. Zuko eyed him silently as he stood and began his introduction, citing the general snatches of news they had heard in the last few days. Without meaning to, the Fire Prince felt his mind begin to wander again. Much of the information he already knew from his diligent hours at his father's desk. So it was very easy to let himself drift, thinking of the free hours spent with the Avatar and his friends with a strange sense of longing...

What General Jiang said next, however, jerked him firmly back to to the present.

"Your highness, I submit that perhaps it might be better to leave many of the soldiers in the Earth Kingdom where they are." The general paused, as if waiting for an explosion, but none came. Paying full attention now, Zuko merely tightened his jaw so infinitesimally that behind the wall of flame, it was indiscernible. _Patience, patience. Hear him through, then cut him down. Don't show anger, don't show weakness, don't show fear. _

The deafening silence resonating from the throne was broken only by the low crackle of the flame, and so the general hesitantly continued. "I submit this for three reasons. Firstly, if you forgive me, your Highness, it will be well nigh impossible in a practical sense to withdraw all troops immediately. Secondly, it will be very costly, both in monetary and resource terms, to undertake such a quick withdrawal. And finally..."

The General swallowed slightly, and then darted a quick look at the Chief Advisor, who returned his gaze with calmness. The moment did not go unnoticed. Zuko's golden eyes narrowed, but befor he could make more of it, his Minister continued.

"Finally, and most importantly, even though the war is over, the divisions and damage caused by it most certainly are not. I propose that having contingents of our own soldiers helping with the rebuilding effort in the Earth Kingdom might aid in healing both. "

All thoughts of the unspoken moment between Hui and the Minister for Foreign Affairs vanished. As Zuko turned the idea over in his head, he was surprised and not a little shocked to realise that the idea had some merit. Struggling a little to contain the sinking feeling in his stomach, he did what was expected.

"Chief Advisor?" he asked mildly.

The old man inclined his head in a seated bow. "Perhaps your Highness might like to open it to the floor?" Hui suggested calmly. "That way we can get everyone's opinion.

Zuko hesitated briefly, and then nodded. "Very well."

A moment later he was regretting it. A few moments after that, Zuko resisted the urge to hold his head in his hands as the room descended into bickering. He didn't even need to listen properly... snatches of sentences came at him thick and fast as he sat impassively on the throne, the grown men in front of him descending into a room of arguing children.

"But then there will be issues with taxes..."

"The commoners are already muttering..."

"Besides, who says those Earth Kingdom peasants will even appreciate it?"

"They could attack us..."

"Reduce our military force..."

"And what of revenge? Now we're the Avatar's lackeys, we're sitting ducks! The military should be brought back immediately to defend..."

"Enough!" Zuko raised his voice, and the echoes of it pushed against the walls of the room. He sat back a little startled at himself. He'd forgotten how well the chamber could command sound, how naturally the fire and the heat channelled itself forth from his lungs. It didn't matter though; the word had served its purpose. Everyone quieted, and their eyes turned to their Prince.

"I have heard what you have all had to say," he hesitated, made his decision, and ploughed on ahead. "And for now, the General Jiang's proposal stands. It is wise and it is practical. However, we will need more information on how that will affect our safety at home. The Minister for Security?"

Nobody answered for a few moments, and then the Chief Advisor stood and bowed. "Forgive him, your Highness. I believe he plead family business a few minutes before the meeting started. Perhaps he will see you in person and in private at a later date?"

Zuko tried very hard not to grind his teeth in frustration as he waved the old man down again. Family business. He'd have to ask Shen Li later, but for now, the glaring absence was nothing more than a pointed insult that he couldn't do anything about.

"Very well," he spoke behind his wall of flame. "Then that brings us to the report of... the Minister for War."

Before he even saw the man who was beginning to rise, Zuko felt something uneasy crawl beneath his skin. Perhaps it was the title... he made himself a mental note to order the Sages to rename it the Minister for Defence. But those thoughts quickly vanished when the man stood up fully, pushing aside his chair and clearing his throat. Zuko's eyes narrowed. His Minister for War had sharply distinct aristocratic features that marked him as one of the highest noble families in the Fire Nation. A pointed nose arced down to a pointed chin, the face all slides and edges that looked as if it were carved by a sword. If that wasn't enough to make Zuko instantly distrust him, he remembered that the man had also served as a high-ranking General in his Father's army, and therefore one of his closest advisors.

Carefully, he rearranged his features to make them even more stone-like than before. General Hang didn't need to see anything he could use to his advantage.

"Since my area is outside of the Fire Nation, I'm afraid I haven't much to report," he began, his voice a hair away from condescending. Zuko's fingers pressed into the arms of the throne. Given that the Minister for Foreign Affairs and the Minister for Trade and Economy had already spoken, they both knew how useless that excuse was. "However, the messenger hawks which have been swift of wing have reported that the town of Gesing has officially recognised the end of the war..."

Zuko fought his growing annoyance as the man went on, the sly amusement in his voice showing how well aware he was that most of the news he had was trivial or useless and unfit to be presented in a meeting of this sort. It could almost be forgivable given that it had only been two days, and the world was a big place... but not quite. Not with his voice, and not with the fact that he was obviously drawing out the moment. Zuko's narrowed eyes narrowed even further with the implications, and it was a relief when the man's shifted position finally signalled his last announcement.

General Hang paused and cleared his throat as around him, the Ministers and Advisors shifted out of boredom. "Oh, and there are reports from the Earth Kingdom that the citizens are slaughtering our soldiers," he finished calmly, before seating himself again.

It took a moment for Zuko to register the words. And when he did, the old trained mantras rose in his head. _Breathe. Calm down. Show no worry, show nothing. Don't let them know your weakness, don't let them..._

_... screw it._

"WHAT?!" The Fire Prince erupted, and as he leapt to his feet the flames he commanded rose too, until they were dancing along the ceiling and advisors and ministers both flinched away from the reflected heat. "Why didn't you tell me?!"

General Hang lifted his head almost languorously, one of the few who had not jerked back in shock. "But I just did, your Highness."

He would have sounded almost innocent if it hadn't been for the mocking laughter in his voice. Zuko clenched his jaw and squeezed his eyes shut. In his mind, he pictured himself leaping from the dais, his directed fire scattering and sparking around him as he grasped the general's throat and squeezed...

He opened his eyes. He breathed. He was not his father. He frowned at the thought and set his shoulders. No, he was definitely not his father. Ozai would have been the perfect Fire Lord, not showing any emotion, dealing in practicality... after all, what were a few more dead soldiers in the long run amongst the thousands that had died since the war began?

Zuko breathed again, and slowly lowered the wall of fire in front of him until it was below his feet. With deliberation, he stepped over the border towards the Ministers, his gaze never wavering from the one staring back at him.

"I think you know quite well what I meant, General Hang," he said, and he was surprised at how calm it was, and how even though he hadn't raised his voice, the sound carried to the corners of the chamber. "And I may not be my father, but I assure you that I have his memory for treacheries and dishonesties."

He waited until his message sank in, until he could see his own words imprinted across their eyes and their faces and the souls that lay lurking behind them. And then he abruptly turned for the exit.

The curtains whispered shut behind him, but he was too focused on the path in front of him to even care about the murmurs building up on the other side. Prince Zuko's mind never wavered on his goal, brushing aside guards and escorts with not even a sound as he continued through the maze of his Palace.

Because he had an Avatar to find.

* * *

Shen Li glanced out the window and stretched, feeling the warmth of the sun's rays smooth over his hair. A tiny edge of guilt scratched at his conscience as he enjoyed the solitude, knowing that rooms away, the Fire Prince he'd silently sworn his fealty to was enduring the office and pomp of Ministers and Advisers who mostly hated him. Still, it had been Prince Zuko himself who'd insisted that he begin work on the prisoners immediately, and that he could handle himself...

The guard captain shook his head with a soft smile at Prince Zuko's stubbornness. He'd have doubted that statement a few days ago, even when he'd seen his Prince defeat the Princess and regain his honour in the eyes of the citizens who had witnessed it. But now, he felt the first few inklings of trust sweep that uncertainty away from him. The seventeen year old would be fine, teenager though he was. It was true that he had a lot to learn, but if he wasn't a fast learner, Shen Li was sure that he would knuckle down and do it the hard way. Most importantly, from what he'd seen, the Prince had his heart in the right place. And that gave the guard captain a comfort he hadn't felt for a while when thinking about the Royal Family.

With another small smile decorating his face, he turned back to the stacks of paper laid out neatly on the desk. Half an hour ago, the Fire Sage in charge had led him silently to the shelf he needed, and then just as silently melted away as the guard captain had frozen, blinking in shock. The files were piled much higher than he'd expected; pages upon pages of meticulous notes ranging from the dusty to the fresh. He'd swallowed as he'd gathered the most recent volumes, his well-trained body straining under the weight as he'd walked to a curtained-away side room to study his finds.

So far, he hadn't found much, but that quickly changed when he tossed aside the current tome in disgust and turned to a neatly printed entry filed only a few days ago, hoping that there might be something about the Fire Princess' companions in there. For the first few paragraphs there seemed to be nothing, not even oblique references to the possible identities of the prisoners whose details would fill the next twenty pages. Then Shen Li's eyes fell on a small, innocuous line, and his eyes widened.

_34 has died, leaving 75 and 87 left from the Southern Water Tribe. _

It was simple, so simple, and so it took a short while for the words to sink in. And then a small explosion of energy erupted, and the guard captain's hands and fingers spread out over the references and flipped through the books in front of him, suddenly distracted from his immediate task. He hadn't even known that there were still Southern Water Tribe prisoners being kept. That there were some still alive. And as he delved deeper, he found more. Waterbenders. An Earth Kingdom higher-up. And members of his own country... rogue soldiers, obstinate minor nobles' relatives, principled former settlers. Shen Li suddenly found himself staring at a whole sordid history of imprisoned lives wrought by the Fire Nation, from all three peoples alike. Soon, he forgot about where he was, forgot about his misgivings, forgot about the time. In fact, he was so engrossed in the numbers, in the dry rustle of the paper and the unspoken stories that were screaming out at him to fix it, that he didn't even hear the soft swish of the curtain until it was too late.

In the hollow space of the library side-room. a step sounded.

There was a second's delay, and then Sheng Li's head jerked up, his eyes instantly catching the distorted shadow that the half-opened curtain cast across his vision. At that very moment, clouds drifted across the face of the sun, darkening the light in the room. The change blurred the shadow the intruder cast, the figure half cut off by the arch of cloth still bunched in his hand. Still, Shen Li didn't need to see him to know who he was.

_Agni._

There was a whisper, and then the curtain closing off the room from the rest of the library fell shut. Shen Li didn't move as silence crept around him. He _couldn_'t move; the chair seemed to freeze beneath him, locking into his body like an iron rod. There was nothing to be done, nothing but sit stiff and straight, his gaze blank and unseeing towards the wall as the intruder spoke.

"Well, well, well... from Guard Captain to Chief Bodyguard."

The voice was almost sibilant in its caress. Someone lesser might have shuddered, but Shen Li kept his posture tall, waiting and silent like a reed in the wind.

"Such a meteoric rise is impressive. Such sudden power and honour is lucky." Slow footsteps approached from behind him, and he could not control it when he began to sweat. "Your... fortuitous luck honours your family, Shen Li."

The guard captain unconsciously bit his lip. _Breathe. _

The sound of boots suddenly stopped, right behind him, and he found that his body was unwilling to obey. Shen Li froze again, his heart a tiny butterfly against his ribs. As always, cold fear wormed its way up from his stomach, but for the first time he could also feel the deep-seated anger licking at its ankles. _I didn't do it for you. I did it for my county. I did it for Prince Zuko._

_... I did it for myself._

And then, out of nowhere, a hand descended firmly onto his shoulder, and it took every muscle fibre within him to stay still as the pressure increased and he felt a hot breath brush past his ear.

"You honour _me_, my son."

That did it. Shen Li jerked away, half-rising from his chair and scattering papers on his desk. "Why are you here, father?" he demanded, still facing the wall.

There was a pause, and then the armoured man moved into the light from the window, and Shen Li saw his shadow fall across the blank surface in front of him. "And why wouldn't I be?" General Sheng asked, a soft tone of controlled amusement bleeding into his voice. "My only son has been given a great honour - a place of trust near the Fire Lord. Is it not natural for a proud, proud father to congratulate his child?"

Shen Li clenched his jaw and turned around. General Sheng was a tall man, and he had to tilt his chin to meet his rock-chipped gaze. Perhaps it was the filtered lighting, but he could swear that for a moment, his father's eyes looked like a bird of prey's - colder and more calculating than he had ever seen them.

"What do you want?" he asked, suddenly weary.

General Sheng spread his arms out wide, as if embracing the world, and enfolded the limp young man in his grasp. Shen Li's face scratched against the shoulder of his father's armour as he clung back weakly, and he was glad when he was released. As soon as his father's arms dropped, he stepped back and leaned heavily against the desk, hoping those sharp eyes wouldn't notice.

Perhaps he was lucky, perhaps he was not, but when General Sheng's gaze flicked down to the hand supporting his son, he made no comment. Instead, he smiled, and it could have been the light that softened his features.

"Whatever you want to think, my son, I _am_ proud. You have brought yourself honour."

For a moment, Shen Li almost believed him, almost believed the warmth and the pride.

But that moment quickly fled.

"And the Fire Lord is lucky to have such a loyal subject..." General Sheng paused, and then his voice deepened and thickened, spreading like a film of blood over fine water. "A subject, I trust, who will do what is right for his country."

From deep within him, Shen Li felt the tiny tongue of anger rise up like a flame. For a moment it hovered in his throat, surrounded by the crushing shadow of his fear, and then it dispersed and he fell back into himself.

"The Fire Lord _is_ the country," he said at last, but his voice was trembling. General Sheng heard it, the lightest touch of what he perceived as surrender, and he smiled again.

"Good, good boy," he said softly, before turning away.

The swish of his father's blood-red cloak and the silence that surrounded it stayed with Shen Li for a long, long time. It trickled down through his ears, a background to his thoughts even when he finally moved again, shifting woodenly back to his work. It hung in the air, distilling his mind back to the task he had been given; to find one woman amongst thousands, her name, her last noted appearance, and her likely companion the only clues he had to sift through pages and pages of official entries. And it echoed in the sunlight as he rechecked the records, tracing names and numbers with a slow finger... only fading away into the distance when his gaze finally rested on the right words, and he sat back in his chair with the scroll in his fingers settling to the table.

There was no doubt in his mind when he looked at the paper again. According to the prison records, Ty Lee and Lady Mai, the companions of the Fire Princess, had been buried deep in the heart of the Boiling Rock for the past few weeks.

And it was time to get them out.

* * *

The first thing he noticed was that the main window was wide open, letting the curtains flap into the wind. Perhaps she'd just left them unlatched... but for a moment, he stared at them, his mind cast back to a different time a century ago. And a sickening feeling dropped into his stomach.

_No. _

The second thing Aang noticed was the small square of paper propped up on the pillows. He walked to it woodenly, fearing what it could possibly say. Because it couldn't be, this wasn't supposed to happen, he was supposed to find her in her room when she wasn't in the infirmary, and...

Aang stared at it.

It was fragile in his fingers, like it could fall away at any moment and float through his element to the floor. But he didn't let it. He gripped it tighter, until he thought it might tear, and its sides crumpled under his skin. The sweat from his fingertips began to wear through. Given a little longer, he just might have destroyed it simply by refusing to let go. But his grip compulsively slackened when he heard the door slide open, sending the paper spiralling to the floor as he twisted to face the intruder.

"Twinkletoes?"

He didn't register the almost resigned tone to her voice until much, much, later... but for now, he could do nothing but stare at his earthbending teacher with a strange emptiness in his eyes.

"She's gone," he whispered.

The girl cocked her head to the side and stepped in, letting the door swing shut. "What do you mean?"

Aang swallowed, his unneeded breath bobbing up and down in his lungs. "I mean she's gone. _Gone_. Katara's gone!" He felt the slow hysteria build up, until he thought it would fly out of his chest and strangle him. On his shoulder, Momo chirped uneasily and flew off, landing on a more stable perch in the chandelier-like light hanging from the ceiling. The Avatar didn't even notice.

"Katara's gone. But she didn't say where!" the boy looked around wildly, as if the waterbender herself would suddenly appear behind a curtain. "Spirits, Toph... Katara's _gone_!"

"Hey now, calm down," Toph picked her way neatly across the floor, avoiding all the furniture in her way until she was standing by her student. A small, warm hand closed itself around his arm. "Breathe, Twinkletoes," she instructed. When he did, taking in large gulping breaths that sounded almost comically loud, she rolled her eyes. "Come on, relax. Katara's a big girl. She can look after herself."

The earthbender snorted and then grinned despite herself. "Heck, she's been looking after all of us as well as herself all this time. This must be a relaxing break for her."

It was like Aang hadn't even heard her. He remembered the note, spinning wildly, grabbing it and thrusting it into her hands. She rolled her eyes again. "How many times do I have to tell you people...?"

Aang shook his head violently. "You don't get it, Toph. Katara's gone, Katara's gone and I have to..."

"Wait!" Toph threw up her empty hand to silence him, her face crumpled into a frown. "I hear something..."

Seconds later, the door flew open again, this time with a crash. The two of them jerked away as the Fire Prince rushed into the room, his topknot slightly askew and his breathing as panicked as the Avatar's.

"Aang!" Zuko shouted. "Agni, there you are... look, you have to come quickly! Earth Kingdom citizens are attacking my soldiers in most of the occupied towns! Please! You have to go there, you have to stop this insanity!"

It was as if the words were reaching him through water. Aang blinked slowly. "What?"

Zuko came to an abrupt halt, "Didn't you hear me?" he thundered. "Earth Kingdom Citizens. Killing. My. People. You have to go stop them... oh Agni... before this all falls apart..."

Toph began to develop something like a headache, the stonework in the room providing too much conductivity for the hammering heartbeats she could hear from both of them. "All right, fine. _Both_ of you calm down, we're not going to get anything done otherwise. Just what do you expect us to do, Sparky?"

The exertion of his sprint finally began to dawn on him, and Zuko answered through pants and gasps. "Get on Appa... that's the quickest way. Agni, I just wish I could... go with you. But someone has to say... keep the peace... if only Uncle was here..."

Toph nodded, perfectly in control. "Right then," she said, thinking aloud. "Well Sugarqueen's out of the question, Snoozles is kinda laid down at the moment, and Fan-Girl's likely going to be staying with him..." she smiled grimly. "I guess it's just one-third of Team Avatar to the rescue."

"No."

Zuko spun around to meet what he was now going to term _the-stubborn-Airbender _look. He felt his heart rate go up again as he clenched his fists. It was funny, but he was beginning to recognise a pattern. Because every time _the-stubborn-Airbender _look popped up, the _urge-to-strangle-said-Airbender_ followed quickly afterwards...

"What do you mean by 'no'?" he demanded. "Aang, you have to stop this insanity! My soldiers are under new orders not to attack anyone, but they're going to crack if they keep getting bombarded! The war will start all over again, and this time, we won't be able to...

"That's not what I meant," Aang's eyes hardened as he gripped his staff. "What I meant was that it won't just be one-third of us going. I'm going to find Katara first."

He was seconds away from launching, the glider already open in his hands, when the earth surged beneath him and locked itself firmly around his ankles. The sudden stop, combined with his propelled motion, was enough to bring him to his knees. Shocked, he wobbled clumsily to a standing position as the stone rotated him around. By the time he could stand up straight, he was facing them again; the grim lines of his earthbending master, the desperate ones of his firebending teacher, And Aang wondered at how little he felt.

"No, Twinkletoes, you aren't. You're going to let Katara go on her merry way, because that's what she needs."

Toph paused, as if listening to something that no one else could hear, and then her face settled again into a determination matched only by the stubbornness of the boy she had trapped.

"And it's what you need too, whether you like it or not."

"No," Aang tried to pull his feet out, but the earth gripped him tighter. The world narrowed down in his vision until it was just him and the lack of Katara, and suddenly he had never felt so absent, so detached. "You don't know what I need. I do. I... I _need_ Katara, and I'm going to find her!"

There was electricity crackling between them, Zuko swore he could almost feel it. It arced around them in threads of invisible tension, feeding off the Avatar's anguish and the earthbender's disbelief. And so he was loathe to speak up, loathe to break into whatever was happening between them until he felt his body doing it for him.

Zukko swallowed dryly. "What exactly is happening?"

He got nothing but a piece of paper shoved in his direction, the earthbender's sightless gaze never leaving the boy in front of her. He didn't look at it, suddenly too riveted on the scene playing out in front of him.

From far, far away, the Avatar saw her expression crease into frustration.

"She doesn't _want_ you going after her! Why do you think she left? After everything she's gone through this last year, she needs some time on her own. And you're going to take that away from her?"

Aang felt his resolve lie still and hard, like a layer of ice. "I'm not taking away anything from her," he said stubbornly. With the words came a rush of remembered power, and he jerked his hand up sharply to break the earth around his ankles. A look of surprise crossed his face when nothing happened. Taking a deep breath, the Avatar split his stance and tried again to free himself from the stone. At that, there was a small groan as a crack split across the rock pinning his feet, but the bindings themselves didn't budge.

"Damn you, Aang!" Toph said through gritted teeth, the nerves in her arms plainly twitching as she fought with all her might to keep him held. "Why don't you think these things through?!"

The sound of his name from her lips seemed to jerk him up short. He'd gotten used to the sly wit and the almost affectionate tone that surrounded 'Twinkletoes'. 'Aang' though, spat out like this, so hard and unyielding and powerful... it was like a shower of cold water. "I thought you cared about her!"

It took a moment for the words to hit him, and then... "I do!" he burst out angrily. "I love her! How can you even say that?"

The look that crossed her face might have been called a smirk, if there hadn't been so much bitter pain behind it. "How can I say it? Have you been listening to yourself for the past couple of seconds? Heck, you know what? I thought that telling you what Katara wants might work. But since it hasn't, why don't we up the stakes a little? Because guess what, Twinkletoes? Katara will _never_ forgive you if you let hundreds of people _die_."

It was as if a magic word had been shouted, freezing them all in their positions. Inwardly, Zuko winced and recoiled. Across from him, a twitch passed over Toph's face before she wiped it expressionless. If she'd gone too far, then...

Well. So be it. She hardened her jaw. After having been a lie her entire life, she sure as hell was not going to let anyone else escape with it.

And as for Aang... he stopped suddenly, as everything she'd been saying finally reached him. At almost exactly the same moment, he felt the rock around his feet tighten again, reform and reshape to strengthen its hold.

_It's funny, _he reflected distantly. _I still haven't told her how earth saved the world._

The rock shifted around his toes, careful not to crush his feet, but still locking him in place nonetheless. He glanced down at his bindings, knowing that if he really, really wanted to, he could probably shift into the Avatar state and break them. And yet, there was already a strange shifting through his chest from her words, a reappraisal that made him remember to breathe.

"Toph," he said quietly, with the utmost calm. "Let me go."

The earthbender cocked her head and listened. His heartbeat, which had been jumping around like the unsteady pattering of rain, had steadied to a calm drumbeat. The control had returned to his voice again, the agelessness that felt so right coming from him, and so she loosened her stance and complied. When the rock broke around him, she finally felt her tiredness from the late night as well as the exertion of trying to keep an angry Avatar still catch up with her. But before she could fall, the boy she'd enclosed in her element steadied her.

"Thanks," he said.

She wanted to demand "For what?" but it didn't seem right. So she just stepped to the side, felt his hand fall away from her shoulder, and said "You're welcome."

The stillness that followed was broken only by the sound of Zuko clearing his throat. At the unexpected noise, the two jumped back, suddenly remembering his presence. The Fire Prince resisted the urge to roll his eyes as he folded his arms, the unread note firmly pressed into the crook of his elbow.

"Well," he said gruffly, "Now that that's blown over, are you going to tell me what you plan to do?"

Aang paused, his gaze sliding back to Toph. Her unseeing eyes glimmered reflectively, like shadows over a mirror. There was a strength behind that look, one that seemed to ground him, and he took a deep breath and felt the mantle of his responsibility settle over his shoulders once more.

_I am Aang. I am the Avatar. I am Avatar Aang. _

"Momo?" he called out suddenly, and the little lemur who had been sitting near the ceiling swooped down to his shoulder again. "Go tell Appa to get ready."

* * *

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A/N II: Phew... that felt long. Anyway, I was going to call this chapter 'Begin' when I realised the irony of admitting that my story is only beginning in the sixth chapter. But ah well... I hope you enjoyed it anyway! Thanks for sticking with me, I promise the ride will get more exciting soon. But until then, please review to let me know how it's going!


	8. Premonition

**Chapter 8: Premonition**

Disclaimer: Mike and Bryan, the show's creators, own Avatar: The Last Airbender, completely. I'm only showing my love of their world by playing in it.

A/N I: Aiee... sorry it's shorter than usual. I've just had to stay way up past my bedtime to get this out before my self-imposed deadline, so I really hope it's worth it! And yet more thanks must be delivered to my awesome, awesome reviewers. It's mostly because of your support and encouragement that this chappie is up here now, so I do hope you all enjoy!

* * *

_I have the strangest feeling_,

_I think it might be dread,_

_The darkest premonition,_

_Of the rivers running red._

* * *

It felt unnatural to be standing in the light after so long in the dark, but the soldier basked in it nonetheless. Crouched in the bushes, he slid his faceplate down a fraction so that the rays could reach his skin. Around him, his armour was already heating up, the external heat matching his internal fire, and he revelled in the feel of it.

"You! Private! Get ready!"

The words were uttered at such a clip that his faceplate was back on before he knew it, instinct overriding reluctance as the golden sunlight was cut away from his skin. The soldier sighed. They'd been waiting for a while now, and he was beginning to count the time by the intervals between the hisses for quiet.

And then...

There.

A blast of fire shot up from somewhere ahead of them, and the twenty men moved as one as they burst from their hiding places and ran bellowing down the hill. A single command echoed in their minds, repeated to them a hundred times as they had prepared for this day, prepared to sweep down on the quiet village that was already burning to the ground, its people flooding out onto the streets with tears and screams.

"Round them up."

With army-trained efficiency, half the soldiers spread out, pushing and dragging their fellow people away from their burning homes and to the edges of the small town square. The other half split off to the middle, hauling stacks of whatever they could find. In under a minute, they had built an ungainly heap of chairs, broken tables and sandbags to form a makeshift platform. And then they parted to let their leader through.

The blocky man stood tall against the burning midday sun, the light casting his face into shadow when he turned to face the motley gathering of villagers. To them, the platform which elevated him above them seemed precarious, unstable in its mix of destroyed and destroying materials. And yet, he seemed to balance on it with such a certainty that they soon forgot about the fact that he was a man standing on a pile of broken wood. Because soon after he ascended he opened his mouth.

"My countrymen." he murmured. "I am honoured to be greeting you today."

A restless stir rushed through the gathered throng, the smoke from the fires blackening their faces and souls with hopelessness. Somewhere amongst them, a man wailed. A moving soldier quickly silenced him, and the man on top of the pile continued.

"Be proud, my fellow citizens. For today, you have been chosen for a very special message," he swept his arms out grandiosely to the burning homes, the snap and crackle of the flame lashing the air. From somewhere in the crowd, a dry sob sounded, and it mixed with the smoke in the wind. The man gestured again as he spoke.

"Yes... be proud, and rest assured that your sacrifice is not in vain! Your houses burn today so that we may let the world know who we are. So that we may let the world know that we, of the Fire Nation, will never take the banished Prince as our leader! That we will restore our honour, and the glory of Agni! For we are meant for the conquering of the world, so that all can know and benefit from our splendour!" He was shouting now, his voice a dragon's roar above the muted crowd. "We will not back down for the Avatar's lackey! We will never bow to the traitor Prince!"

It was as if the last words were a signal, because all around him the houses chose at that moment to collapse. The sound of shrieking wood mixed with the cries of the soldiers around him as they stamped their feet and chanted amidst the crowd.

"We will not back down for the Avatar's lackey! We will never bow to the traitor Prince! We will not back down for the Avatar's lackey! We will never bow to the traitor Prince!"

Somewhere in the crowd, a mother covered her daughter's ears. Another pressed her hand tightly over her baby's mouth, leaving his nose free as he opened his voice to cry. Somewhere else, an old woman leaned against her bruised and battered grandson, silent tears trickling down her cheeks. The man on the heap smiled, and his voice suddenly grew soft.

"And mark my words, we will have our way no matter what fate decides to throw in our path."

He let it sink into them, let it slide down their throats and seeping into their skin before he raised his voice once again. "And never fear, my countrymen! It is because we are ready, and because we are willing, that we have sent Prince Zuko another message. Just to be certain."

The villagers watched, mute and terrified, as he drew out a single glinting object from his belt. Slowly, almost lovingly, he wove the dart around his fingers, the steel a deadly caress against his skin. Spread out in front of him, the silent crowd could barely see it, but the dart left an oily glitter on his hands as the clear poison dripped from its edge.

The man smiled, and then caught the weapon tightly in his palm. "News doesn't travel fast in these backwaters. But the _other_ message... it should reach him soon."

* * *

The Fire Prince cut a lonely figure on the docks of the Fire Nation as Appa soared away through the air, his white fur quickly rendering him near indistinct from the puffy clouds. An onlooker might have wondered at how long he stood there, the wind whipping at his simple gold-embroidered robes. The sky seemed vast and open over him, like an empty bowl waiting to be filled by the turbulent promise of storm on the horizon. The greyness it lent to the sun cast a pall over both his face and the land that he stood on.

Zuko felt a strange lump rise in his chest, its numbness spreading out to his hands. For so long, the sky bison had been a silent catchcry to him, a dream drilled into his head just as his Firebending forms had been drilled into his body. Any sight, sound or trace of the animal had meant one thing; the Avatar. And of course, the Avatar had meant hope. Hope for himself, for his birthright, for his fierce longing to return home. Hope for Ozai's love and approval, for a place, for the Fire Nation.

In the end, it all came back to the Fire Nation.

But that had been then, a few months ago that seemed like a lifetime. Now, as Zuko watched one-third of Team Avatar disappear into the sky, he wanted nothing more but to be with them, speeding away form his country to the people who truly needed him.

How things had changed.

And yet, how they hadn't. The distant airborne speck was still the vessel of his hope. It was just different now. Transformed. It no longer relied on a loveless father, it rested on the slim shoulders of a twelve year old who had proved himself more than capable of holding it. Because even if Ozai's living presence in the Tower disquieted him, he had no argument with the final outcome.

Zuko let a thin smile crook his lips. The Avatar and the Fire Lord. Fate and Destiny. They were all funny, funny things.

_I'm counting on you, Aang. _

Zuko took one last glance at the horizon and then turned abruptly away, his robes dragging heavily over his feet. He had only taken two steps, however, before he was pulled up short by the sight of his Chief Advisor standing less than a foot away, his keen eyes twinkling brightly.

"Very, very good, your highness," the old man murmured. "At the very least, your detractors can never say that you neglect to back your words with action."

Zuko let out a muted rush of breath. "Chief Advisor Hui," he said, inclining his head briefly to hide his shock. The old man was quiet despite his age; Zuko hadn't even heard his footsteps. Suddenly, he wondered just how long he'd been standing there, and a thread of discomfort wormed its way through his gut. "What brings you here?"

It came out more curtly than it was meant to, but the other man didn't seem to notice. "Your highness," Hui bowed much lower, befitting his position. When he straightened again, a smile reformed his lined face. "There was somewhat of a... stir after your departure. I merely came to see if you could use my services, but I see that they are not needed."

Zuko kept his expression stony. "You agree, then, that sending two twelve year olds out to a war zone is keeping the Fire Nation's best interests at heart?"

The smile faded away slowly, naturally, like the owner was just folding it away for another time. "The Fire Nation will never again make the mistake of underestimating Avatar Aang. And besides his more obvious credentials, his swiftness is his strength in these tumultuous times." He paused, as if trying to choose the right words. "Yes... I do believe that your course of action was wise."

Zuko narrowed his eyes. Hui gazed back at him, dignified and serious. The opacity of him was beginning to be infuriating - the experience in his calmness, the benevolence that shrouded his features... he wished he could rip it all up and expose the man underneath. There were too many daggers lurking in the shadows, too many people who could be wielding them. Zuko clenched his jaw. He was tired of political games already, and he had been home for barely three days.

_How can I even begin to restore the Fire Nation's honour when I don't even know who to trust?_

"Tell this to me straight, Advisor Hui," he said coldly. "Why are you here?"

It could have been the tone in his voice, but the old man bowed slightly, a strange expression flickering over his features as he understood. And then, like a wave of water, Hui's face smoothed into almost serenity as he lifted his face to the overcast sky.

"For one hundred years, the policy of the Fire Nation has been geared towards the war. We Advisors have played no part in choosing the direction, we have merely shaped and guided it as is our role."

The old man straightened, a proud nobility settling around his shoulders like a cloak. "But now, I sense that the times are changing. In the last few days, more than a war has been brought to its end. The Fire Nation's journey has been halted, has been redirected to something different. And so, like all new beginnings, we must weather and adapt to the changes."

There was a long silence between them, two men on the docks as the sea whispered agitatedly in the bay and the distant cries of market seller sliced the air. And then a flicker crossed Zuko's eyes. "You are wise, Chief Advisor."

Hui's blood-red robes brushed the ground as he inclined his head and dipped, a benign smile resting on his face when he rose. "Thank you, your highness. In my position, that is the highest compliment."

Zuko dipped his head, and then felt a sudden weariness rush through him. "I... apologise," he said suddenly, even as his own voice screamed inside his head at what he was about to do. _Show no weakness! Show no fear! What are you doing?!_ "I did not mean to interrogate you."

As if Zuko hadn't just broken all of his own rules, and quite a few expected codes of conduct as well, Hui shrugged as if nothing had happened. "There is no need to apologise, your highness. I understand that these are trying times, and you are only being cautious. That, too, is wise."

He paused for a moment, and then continued. "And in the light of that all, I would advise this. Trust your Ministers only by what their actions tell you. It is just... unfortunate that that level of judgement already fails some of them."

_Ah yes... _Without consciously meaning to, Zuko felt his own paranoia stir up again. The Minister for War, the Minister for Security... the empty seat where the latter should have been spoke even more than the former's insolence. Zuko nodded his head in silent acknowledgement that he had taken the words into consideration, and then began walking again. His Chief Advisor turned and followed at his shoulder, moving with an almost gliding grace that spoke of years of practice. Nothing was said as they moved up the path back to the palace, and an odd sort of calm settled over the Fire Prince as they went.

Whatever old and new worries that the Ministerial meeting had stirred up, tomorrow would mark Azula's funeral... and his coronation. And that was what he had to focus on now. To be honest, despite his lifelong dream to lead his country into the light, he almost wished that it wasn't happening so fast. The way he'd envisioned it over the last couple of days had included a crowd of four peoples, of the Avatar standing by his side and all of his friends in attendance. But now... there was no way the peoples of the four nations could gather in such a short time, and even if they could, he wondered if it would be peaceful. Toph was gone with Aang to quell the disturbances in the Earth Kingdom. Zuko sighed. Ah well, nothing was perfect. It'd be annoyingly symbolic, actually. Because despite his friends... at the end of the day, the burden of restoring the Fire Nation's honour rested on his shoulders and his shoulders alone.

Zuko sighed again and straightened said shoulders. How he wished he could delay the ceremony now... at least until everyone could return. He would have liked Iroh to be there too, despite his uncle's protests about the old and the new and what the people would and would not accept. Unconsciously, Zuko reached up and pinched the bridge of his nose. At least he would have Sokka, Suki and...

... Katara.

Zuko's eyes shot wide open, and suddenly he remembered the paper he'd thrust into his pocket, the open window and Aang's large, glassy gaze. The image of the floating curtain was all he could see for a moment, and then he was gone. Somewhere in the corner of his mind, Zuko registered himself mumbling a short dismissal, and heard Chief Advisor Hui's words echo back. But then all he could feel was the movements of his own body, of his swift turn and of his run to the privacy of his father's study.

Zuko swung the door open and collapsed on the seat, his controlled movements only taking him half an inch away from sending the soldier figurines on the floor to a clattering heap. The letter was already in his hand. Carefully, Zuko unfolded it, noting the extra creases put there by Aang's grip.

The first thing that he realised was that it was a very large piece of paper for the single sentence that adorned its surface, like the first line of an unwritten story. The strokes were clear but hurried, and it was with a strange sense of detachment that he finally let himself understand what had been written.

_Take care of each other. _

It was funny how that was all she really needed. Five words. Five words to say all that she could have said, all that she wouldn't have said, and even the million things that she didn't need to say. Things like _I love you all _and _I'll be back,_ and even _don't come looking for me._ It was as if the life and the passion in her burnt so fiercely that it overflowed into even her writing.

Gently, Zuko set the paper down onto his desk. It unfurled unharmed, its swift penmanship facing the sky, and he let his fingers brush lightly over the dried ink. They were just five words, and yet he took a strange kind of comfort from seeing them. He had family now, besides Uncle. Azula might be dead, and Ozai might be rotting away in the dungeon, and his mother might be Agni-knows-where...

But he had family.

Exactly five seconds after that comforting realisation washed over him, reality set back in like a pailful of cold water. _Take care of each other... _that mean that Katara was no longer there. Katara was gone, lost in the swirls and chaos of the post-war world... and they had no idea where she was.

The first thing that came to him was disbelief. _Why? _Why now? Why, after they'd only just finished it, and then only just began picking up the pieces would she leave now? Thinking, Zuko cast his mind back to the last time that he'd seen her, trying to find some reason amongst the confusion. And then he froze.

"_I __**did**__ think of something. I'm just sorry that it wasn't _good_ enough for you."_

Zuko was halfway through his transition from bewilderment to panic, when a voice cut through him and he swung himself around to face the doorway.

"Pr... Zuko?"

"Shen Li," Zuko shook his head to clear it and pushed the letter away from him, the cloak of business quickly descending on his thoughts. "What brings you here?"

Perhaps if he had been more settled, he would have noticed that the guard captain's face was unusually expressionless, even for him. As it was, Shen Li merely looked like something important was up, which really was to be expected. "What else? I found who you were looking for. Lady Mai and Ty Lee. They're at the Boiling Rock."

It was so very simple. _Lady Mai and Ty Lee. They're at the Boiling Rock. _But somehow, it wasn't, because it meant that both relief and guilt clawed him at the same time. Zuko exhaled slowly, extricating himself from all the resurfacing feelings and promising himself he would deal with them later when he was alone."You work quickly," he said finally, his voice flat but encouraging. "That's a talent."

Shen Li allowed the compliment to bend his lips into a smile, but then the lightness dropped from his face again. "That's not the only thing I found," he continued grimly. "I was looking through the older archives... there are still two waterbenders from the Southern Water Tribe in our prisons. Not at the Boiling Rock, of course. But close by, on another island."

Zuko blinked, and pushed away the image of deep blue eyes. _Not now, not her. _"After all this time?" he demanded in disbelief. "How can that even be possible?"

Shen Li laid the papers down on the desk. "The raids took place over a number of years. From what I understand, these waterbenders were barely fifteen when they were taken the last time."

Zuko let the horror seep quietly into his stomach. "And they've been in prison ever since?"

Shen Li nodded. "And not just the Southern Tribe Waterbenders," he lifted up another sheaf of paper. "There are a few Earth Kingdom rebels that have been there nearly half as long, which is still a decent time."

_Water... Earth... _an idea began to form in Zuko's head as he heard them, and he was almost afraid of it for a moment. _What are you thinking? _he asked himself silently, derisively. _To pull this off, you need luck. And since when, Prince Zuko, have you ever been lucky? _

But then again, risk alone had never been enough to deter him.

Zuko set his shoulders. "How long will it take you to get to the Boiling Rock and to the Waterbenders' prison and back again?"

The unspoken request rang silent in his eyes, and Shen Li was surprised at the ease with which he read it. Unbidden, his eyes travelled to where Zuko's fingers hovered unconsciously over a piece of paper, and he felt his eyebrow arch slightly. Interesting. Perhaps that had something to do with it...

Reluctantly, Shen Li wrenched himself away from his curiosity and glanced at the midday sun, gauging its distance from the horizon. "If I start off now, and with minimal delay... I should be back with Lady Mai, Ty Lee, the Earth rebels and the Waterbenders by mid-morning tomorrow."

"Perfect, that still gives us around two hours before the ceremony itself." Zuko nodded in satisfaction, and then a faint grin spread itself over his features. "You'd best get going, then. Oh, and while you're at it, send out those scouts I was talking about this morning. I want all my bases covered as soon as possible."

Shen Li's eyes strayed to the map on the floor, his heart sinking into his chest. "I can't believe I'm saying this, Zuko, but the secret army is the last thing you need to be worrying about at the moment."

Zuko frowned. "What do you mean?"

Shen Li's hands tightened. "Tomorrow is your coronation. A public event. All of your people in the capital will be there. Many from the country will be coming in too. Not to mention the fact that your nobles will all be assembled in one place, and the fact that you will be inviting war prisoners who have every reason to hate you. Security is going to be nearly impossible to monitor."

Zuko shrugged. There was little room for manoeuvring now, and even littler room for fear. "Well, that's what your father is for, isn't it?"

The silence was deafening. Zuko turned slowly to see the strangest look on the guard captain's face, and a faint glow of recognition sparked within him. He'd never seen that expression before, he was sure of it. And yet, there was something about it...

It was Shen Li's eyes that did it; his unmarked, unburned eye. Suddenly, Zuko realised exactly why everything about it seemed so alien, and yet so familiar.

"Shen Li," he began slowly, his eyes never leaving the other's face, " Your father wasn't there at the Ministerial meeting this morning."

Shen Li said nothing. _I know. _

Zuko pushed back his chair and rose, each movement drawn out and pulled down by its weight. "Shen Li, I need to know this now. Tomorrow, when I am crowned Fire Lord, will I have to keep an eye in your Father's direction as well?"

Silence.

Zuko's voice grew harsher. "Will I have to watch my back when he gives me his reports? Will I have to send spies to follow his movements? Dammit, Shen Li, answer me!"

The silence grew, spread, stretched, and then... "No," Shen Li said at last, almost as if he were speaking to himself. "He wouldn't do that. For all of his pride, Father wouldn't do that."

Zuko thought back to the empty seat, to his paranoia, to Chief Advisor Hui, and then sighed. " I hope you're right," he said grimly. "Because you're also right about one thing. I've got too many things to worry about now." The Fire Prince sighed, and then slumped back into his seat. "The uprising, the coronation, the Earth Kingdom, Katara going missing..."

Shen Li jerked back in surprise. "The waterbender? What do you mean by 'going missing'?"

Zuko rubbed his eyes tiredly, lowering his posture to rest his forehead in the palm of his hand. "Perhaps that was the wrong term... I think it's more like she's made herself go missing."

"I see. Do you have any idea where she might have gone?"

The Fire Prince sat back up again, his fingers reaching out for the note. "She left last night, I think... that was the last time anyone saw her. But with that amount of time, she could be halfway to a lot of places by now." Zuko shook his head with an aggravated sigh, and then lowered himself back down to rest on his palm again. "Although somehow, I think I'd feel a little better if she was close by. For all of our troubles, the Fire Nation is safer than the deck of some pirate's ship for a girl."

There was a pause. "You might want to rethink that."

Zuko's head snapped up to meet the guard captain's gaze. "What do you mean?"

Shen Li nudged a horde of figurines with his foot, and the blood-red soldiers shifted sideways until they roughly matched the red marks that had dotted the scroll. He did it again, sweeping the figures indiscriminately from random parts of the map until a veritable army was massed in the mountain ranges of the Fire Nation like a sea of crimson.

"She's by herself, yes?" Shen Li asked quietly.

Zuko said nothing, and then... "As far as we know."

Shen Li shifted his armor-clad feet one last time, the movement adding one final contingent to the poised sprawl of soldiers. "In that case, I think you'd better hope that she's far, far away from the Fire Nation right now."

* * *

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A/N II: I'm just going to take this opportunity to thank everyone again for the awesome feedback and support I'm getting. I know this story has been a bit of a slog so far... I know that I really need to improve my storytelling style, so really... thanks to everyone who is still sticking around and staying with me. I want to let you know that I really appreciate it, and I hope that I'm getting better as I go so that you can enjoy the ride too. :)


	9. Katara Alone I

**Chapter 9: Katara Alone - I**

Disclaimer: Mike and Bryan, the show's creators, own Avatar: The Last Airbender, completely. I'm only showing my love of their world by playing in it.

A/N I: Whew... This is officially the longest document I have ever uploaded, and the most time I've ever spent writing when I should be doing work. Anyway, I'm sorry I'm a day over the one week limit, but I hope you'll agree with me in thinking the wait was worth it. :)

* * *

_If Gran-Gran was engaged, then why did she leave? - Katara_

_Book I, Episode 18 - The Waterbending Master_

* * *

Katara paused for a moment to breathe in the warmth of the Fire Nation night, her clothes sticking to her under a light sheen of sweat. She had been walking steadily for hours, letting her feet carry her further and further away from the past. But now, as the dawn drew closer, she felt her footsteps slowing. She'd passed the last outskirts of the city a while ago, and so there was nothing but open plain spreading ahead of her, the landscape broken only by a few hardy bushes and lovely trails of straggling flowers. The world was washed of colour in the dimming moonlight, but nonetheless, Katara could appreciate the beauty of the Fire Nation landscape.

Still, it wasn't the land that made her pause so much as the light that was beginning to creep up on top of it. Somewhere along the way, Katara had made the decision to follow the coastline. And as she climbed the last few yards to the next cliff-top, she couldn't fault her choice. Like a golden koi fish swimming just below the surface, the sun sent brilliant streaks through the water on the horizon. It made for a magnificent sight.

It wasn't quite the same though... not the same as sunrise over the ice floes, that magic moment when the reflected light was so beautiful it hurt your eyes. Katara paused and looked out from the highest fold in the land, an untold ache starting somewhere deep within her.

It was good that it began like that, small as a seed but rapidly unfurling, because that mean that Katara was prepared when she was suddenly struck by a wave of homesickness. Still, it brought her to her knees in the grass, her small pack clutched tightly in her lap as he eyes gazed over the sea. The view was still gorgeous, the push and pull of the ocean comforting an ancient longing somewhere deep within her very soul. But the difference of it raised an unavoidable question.

What was she doing here, a drop of water in a sunburnt land? Katara frowned, slowly uncrossed her legs from beneath her, and then leant forwards, resting her cheek in the heel of her palm. A slow uncertainty roiled in her, like a mini-whirlpool sucking her energy down into its spout. The feeling had begun the instant she had consciously made up her mind to 'run away', and it had persisted ever since. That was why she had never made a conscious decision to stay in the Fire Nation. Somehow, it had just happened, the shifting, eddying feeling inside her guiding her steps for the last ten hours. Katara felt the tiredness seeped into her bones drag her down just a little further. She'd made good time, so she could afford to rest now, maybe even sleep. But she knew without question that sleep was beyond her at the moment.

She had to think.

The silence of dawn stretched out ahead of her, broken by the sound of the waves crashing on the rocks beneath. With her objective settled in mind, Katara slowly loosened her grip on the bag and placed it beside her. There wasn't much in there, really. A change of clothes to replace the blue ones under her black ninja garb. A portable tent that folded into a roll the width of her arm. A closely wrapped bundle of food that would last her a few days, enough until she figured out what to do next. A satchel of toiletries and essentials like needle and thread. And then one more, a small pouch that was deceptively heavy and made up for everything else she didn't have.

"_Here, Sugarqueen. I've been saving it for something special."_

_The words that she wasn't saying rang loudly in their ears and Katara stared. "You kept this?"_

_Toph smirked. "I've still got more knocking around. We made a _lot_ of cash in those days."_

_The pride in her voice made Katara laugh, and for the tenth time that hour she wrapped Toph in a hug. Surprisingly enough, this time the little earthbender hugged her fiercely back. Perhaps it was because everything else was already packed and everything else was ready, and so she knew goodbye was soon. Or perhaps it was just because it felt right._

_For once, Katara was the first one to let go. She stepped back, her eyes brimming a little, but her own self control maintained the tears. "Thanks Toph. For everything."_

_Her 'little sister' scowled. "I'm expecting you to pay it all back, d'you hear? Every last copper piece. With interest."_

_Katara smiled. "Count on it."_

_And then she left, just like that. Because there was nothing more to be done; Toph had already said everything that she needed to say in her own Toph-like way. And as Katara shimmied out the length of the window, prepared to use every inch of her skill and speed to outsmart the guards stationed throughout the palace, she heard the unspoken words sound clear and sharp in her mind._

_Come home. Be safe. I'll look after the others. _

_Katara didn't look back._

A soft smile on her lips, Katara tugged the bag once more, feeling the comforting weight in it lent by the small pouch. Weeks ago, if someone had told her that she'd be running off through the Fire Nation and leaving Toph in control of things, she would have laughed out loud in their faces. If they'd persisted, she might have even smacked them with a water whip... after all, weeks ago she'd still been feeling pretty vengeful, what with the newfound addition to their party and the electric taste of hatred she'd gotten in her mouth every time he passed.

Katara let out a low laugh, at herself this time, and then straightened and looked out to sea. She wasn't quite sure where she was, she hadn't really been following any particular route. There had been no need for it this time, and she revelled in the feeling of being able to choose not to take a direction, of just literally going with the flow of it, no matter how uncomfortable and how draining it felt to have an aching inner compass inside her, that pushed and pulled and wavered on uncertainty and just made her so _tired_. Still, even her physical, mental and spiritual exhaustion couldn't completely block the heady feeling of freedom... the last year had always been Aang's destiny pointing out where to go next, and then Sokka's directions and Fate taking them there.

And now she had nothing. No Avatar to follow, no brother to tell her what was next on their schedule. No Destiny, no Fate. She could have done anything, gone anywhere... and yet somehow the little pool inside her of uncertainty and hurt had decided to stay in the Fire Nation, right where all of it had started in all of the wrong ways.

Why?

Katara groaned and slumped sideways, wishing that she could stay there for a while. These days, it seemed that all she could do was run around in circles around her head. She didn't know why. She could only guess. Perhaps, somewhere inside her she just knew that the Earth Kingdom held nothing for her at the moment, and that as much as she wished it, the glittering icebergs of her home or the North Pole didn't seem quite right either. Perhaps for once, she wanted both land and water to guide her steps, a strange sort of harmony in this country where flame presided also.

Funny, how when she had the freedom to finally choose, in a way, she'd chosen to stay right where she was. Katara wrinkled her nose. Perhaps she'd finally gotten too tired of dreaming? When she was little, she remembered some of the elders saying something like that. Before they'd died, they'd been the last generation Southern Water Tribe people to still cling to some of the traditions of the North. Without meaning to, Katara felt herself drift off into the memory.

"_What are you doing so idle, child?"_

_Katara looked up, her childish face near frozen from the winds. She'd finished mending Sokka's pants a while ago, and had decided to step out of the tent for some air. And then she'd found herself racing through the snow, and that heap over there became a castle to besiege, that young cold-scarred tree a handsome prince to save. It had been fun for a while... until the old man had startled her._

_She stepped back, a little timid, a little defensive. "Just playing."_

_There was an old grunt of disapproval. "You should be inside," he said severely. "I'm sure you still have plenty of work to do."_

_She couldn't stop herself. "But I've done it all already!" it burst out, "Can't I just have time to daydream a little? Sokka gets to play with his toy spear all the time and not do any work!"_

_The instant the words flew out of her mouth, she wished she could take them back. Because they sounded alien to her ears. They were the words of a six year old, and although that was her age, today was the first time she'd felt it since her mother's death three months ago. _

_Katara shivered a little and pushed the tears away (she was getting better at that). There as a long, long silence. And then..._

"_Dream on, little fish," Old Paoi finally said, his voice gruff as he turned away. He was a tall man for being so old, and the height of his back as he strode from her seemed more than a slap in the face than his words. "As long as you remember that that's all they'll remain."_

_..._

Katara's eyes snapped open, and her body convulsively hurled itself forwards. For a moment she sat like that, grass shreds tangled in her hair. And then she realised with a shaky laugh that she'd somehow fallen asleep.

_Okay, Katara. Nap-time. You can think about why you're in the Fire Nation later. _

Wearily, Katara pulled out the tent and unrolled it, moving almost mechanically as she set up the poles. She was suddenly so exhausted that it felt like she couldn't move, and she wondered why. _Oh yeah, I've just forgotten what a vacation the last year has been. _

Still, it was more than that. She just wasn't nearly ready enough to admit it to herself.

When the structure was finally up, Katara crawled into the shelter it offered and curled up on the mat. Within seconds, her eyes shut, and she fell into a deep, dreamless, yet troubled sleep.

* * *

_That's...! ...I don't know, I've never left home before..._

* * *

The sun was high in the sky when Katara opened her eyes again, its rays hot on her skin even through the material of the tent. With a bleary groan, the waterbender rose and groped her way out to the opening. From the cliff-top, she drew a stream of water from the sea itself, bringing her mind back to full consciousness as she concentrated on leaving all the salt and impurities behind. When she drank, it was fresh and cold, and that was enough to get her back on her feet and moving again.

She packed up in record time, amazed at how much easier it was when she was alone. There was no Sokka to wake up, no hungry mouths to feed besides her own. And she didn't need much... Katara worked a piece of bread out of her pack and chewed thoughtfully as she moved on again, trying to follow the restless feeling deep within her, lower even than her stomach. Strangely enough, it seemed to have found another course over her sleep; for the first time she found herself turning her back on the ocean and heading further inland, swiping away the flies with flicks of her own sweat bent expertly with her wrists.

_Now where am I going? _she wondered tiredly. Her initial alertness after the short rest seemed to have faded away. She moved like an automaton as the day grew longer and her limbs grew weaker, too restless to stop for long and too stubborn to eat enough food when she did. She only falteringly followed the urge deep within her, the ball of emotion pushing and pulling beneath her stomach. Finally, when it was nearing sundown, Katara found herself staggering into a small Fire Nation village nestled away in the hills.

It was a small place, just a surprisingly large market square in the middle and around twenty houses crowded in an outwardly spiralling circle around it. It felt like a stopover on the way to some greater destiny, a slumbering person about to take her first step into the dream world. Its most prepossessing feature was a moderately sized river which cut its way through the middle of the town, its banks muddy with waste, but the water flowing through its center startlingly clear. The mere sight of it brought a smile to her lips as she moved through the closing marketplace, her sharp ears picking out a distant rushing which she surmised to be a waterfall further up the river, perhaps amidst the craggy mountains that cut a steep path less than a mile from where the last house ended.

Katara was so tired and so grateful for that reassuring sound that when the body bumped into her, she barely noticed. It took a few more seconds before she realised exactly what had happened, and then...

"Hey!" Katara yelled after the retreating back. "Stop! Thief!"

As one, the people around her raised weary heads to watch in astonishment as this black-clad stranger, a hint of blue flashing around her legs as she ran, sprinted after a rapidly disappearing figure as he led her a chase through the village. Katara soon realised that the place itself was outwardly deceptive - enough alleys ran throughout the bumps and ridges of the land and between the houses for whoever she was following to constantly duck into and try to lose her, using his superior knowledge of the village to thwart her pursuit. But then again, she hadn't been running from the Fire Nation for most of the year for nothing. Sure, it was ironic that this time it was she who was doing the chasing, but then again she was a quick learner.

He turned a sharp corner and led her back through the square, heaving gasps beginning to spill from his lungs. Completely unaware of all the people still watching her, she tore after him, her breathing only just beginning to get a little heavier. And then he ducked into another alley, and when she finally turned the corner she saw him stopped in the shadows, near doubled over, but with a mutinous glare in his eyes.

"You want it," he rasped, holding up his arms menacingly, "You'll have to fight for it."

Katara didn't even have time to think, or to even use her waterbending. She'd watched Sokka and Suki enough times now to know how it was done, and as the youth lunged for her, she dodged quickly under his clumsy attack, coming up from beneath him. All it took was one hard yank, one quick close-fisted punch, and then he reeled back to collapse with a thump as she grasped her re-liberated money bag.

Katara felt a hard flush of victory seep into her blood, quickening around her body with her accelerated heart rate. She'd done it. Such a little thing it seemed, but after having felt so drained and tired and weak the entire day, she was glad. And then she took a closer look at the boy.

He was clearly winded from her blow, his eyes still bulging out in shock and his mouth gaping as he stared at her. Suddenly, she felt her stomach drop out from beneath her. La, he was just a child, probably not much older than Aang. His hair was done in a near-perfect topknot, only a few strands escaping from the holdings, and his skinny body was dressed in faded red. But it was his face that gave him away, a face that she had seen far too often now; a face too prone to frowning and suffering for such a young age. A wave of regret washed through her and she stepped forwards instinctively to help him up, only to have him scramble back.

"I-I'm sorry! Please Miss, I'm sorry! My... I... it's just, I really needed some money, and you looked..."

He hesitated and looked at her, his eyes still wide and staring, and Katara pulled back, a sudden irony twisting her lips.

"Like a helpless little girl?" she asked dryly.

Mutely, he nodded, a mask of terror stamped on his youthful face that just didn't belong there. Slowly, Katara lowered herself down to a crouch and reached forwards, mindful not to scare him.

"It's okay," she said softly. "I understand. Here, let me help you up."

Distrust shone from his eyes as he stared at her, but then slowly he took her hand and she pulled him up. He instantly hung his head, stray locks of black hair tumbling over his golden eyes, and Katara couldn't help but think of another boy that she knew.

"Hey, it's okay," she said again. "I'm not going to hurt you. But I do want to know why you wanted my money. What do you need it for?"

It was as if the words had straightened his spine again, because his head jerked up defiantly. "I need it for my mother," he rasped, his voice proud again, no longer the cowering kid he'd been just a second ago. "I need it so I can convince her to leave her inn, and we can get away before it's too late!"

It wasn't much, and she didn't quite understand, but Katara read the conviction in him and she knew that he was telling the truth. For a moment, she contemplated just giving the bag to him. It was something that she would have done perhaps a year ago. But then she thought about the future and what she might need in this country still hostile to foreigners, and she sighed.

The world didn't just change with the end of the War. The Fire Nation still had a long way to go.

"An inn, you say?" she finally said. "Well, it so happens that I was looking for a place to stay tonight. Perhaps if you take me there..."

She squeezed the bag meaningfully, and his round eyes became even rounder.

* * *

_It is the strength of your hearts that make you who you are, hearts that will remain strong and unbroken when all rock has been eroded away.  
_

* * *

Surprisingly enough, the Moonrise inn was only one of the medium-sized buildings in the town. Lee explained it haltingly to her, his voice growing more confident as he became more sure that this strange foreign girl with the beautiful blue eyes wasn't going to attack him again. A century ago, the town had had a thriving trade, and one of the biggest markets outside of the Fire Nation capital. It had been home to artisans, musicians, painters... a whole bevy of cultural joy that had earned it acclaim.

And then of course, the war had come.

Taxes were jerked up a steep incline. The artists were no longer funded - there was no warning, the money just disappeared. Destitute, they had stopped, no longer able to live as they once had. Over the course of decades, the biggest houses were pulled down as everyone who had once lived in them flocked to the capital for work. And the inn, once one of the most welcoming and largest establishments in town, had been forced to sell off divisions bit by bit, until it had been left with just the main building and a few extensions.

And although that still didn't sufficiently explain why he had resorted to stealing, as Katara slowly entered the old inn, she saw as many of the sad, drooping faces reflected back at her as she had seen outside. They sat around tables, this main room clearly more of an impromptu bar than anything else. Their shadows draped off dilapidated but clean walls. It was clear that this place was as tired and hopeless as the people inside it, and the restless feeling in her subsided a little at the wave of compassion that suddenly flooded her chest. There was something wrong here.

"Lee! Where have you been?"

The boy walking next to her suddenly stiffened, and then straightened to his full height, a very impressive four foot twelve for his age. "Mother," he darted a quick glance at the girl beside him, and then back to the middle aged woman fast approaching. "I brought a... guest. She needs someplace to stay tonight."

"Oh! Well that's good, I thought you were off getting into trouble again! Tell me, young miss. What can I do for you today?"

Katara saw Lee swallow, and with a hint of amusement, she turned back to his mother. She was probably around her forties, a few wisps of grey hidden amongst her tightly pulled back bun. But her fringe framed a soft, heart-shaped face that was still obviously pretty after so many years of work. Katara smiled at the kindness she saw there.

"Hi, I'm Katara. And, just a room thanks," she said, and then felt her stomach grown in protest. Blushing a little, she added "And some dinner would be great."

"Done and done," the woman nodded, doing figures in her head. "That'll be eight silver pieces."

Katara felt Lee's eyes on her as she drew the money pouch out of her bag. She knew that he hadn't had time to look inside, but she could remedy a little of that now. Quickly, she counted out eight gold pieces and pressed them firmly into the innkeeper's hands. The woman nodded briefly, and then looked down, her eyes widening.

There was a silence as Katara waited, filled in only by the periphery of low murmurs as the people in the rest of the taproom talked, and then the innkeeper's face hardened and she thrust the coins back into Katara's fingers.

"We don't take charity, young miss." she turned to go back to the bar, tall and proud in her tired body. " Not from the Water Tribe, not from anywhere!"

"Mother..." Lee started, but Katara got there first. She reached out without thinking, her other hand firm on the woman's shoulder. The innkeeper swung around to face her at the touch, her face still hard and cold, and Katara suddenly remembered that she'd been recognised.

She sighed. Well, she hadn't even bothered changing her name, and she was obviously wearing blue under the black, and she hadn't even removed her mother's necklace. And again, there was the matter of her darkened skin, her brown hair and her blue eyes. Those were things that she couldn't hide, and she never planned to.

She firmed her lips. Damn it all. It was the end of the war now, she didn't have to hide anything. She was Katara of the Southern Water Tribes, and she didn't care who knew about it.

"It's not charity when you need it and when its due," she insisted bluntly, watching fear and suspicion chase itself over the other woman's face. "I'd like some information about this place too."

"So you can invade it with your warriors? I think not!" the innkeeper shrugged her hand off and folded her arms, anger beginning to encroach blackly on her face. "You'll not get anything out of me, water scum!"

The inn was small, and so Katara wasn't surprised when she suddenly felt what seemed like a million eyes pierce her skin. She clenched her teeth. This wasn't going nearly as well as she thought it would. The woman continued, her voice rising.

"The war may be over, but that doesn't mean that we'll surrender to the likes of you and the traitor Prince! We'll keep our homes and our freedom, thank you very much and I..."

"Stop it!" Katara yelled. The woman froze and the anger thawed away to be replaced by fear as the girl in front of her seemed to grow. "How can you say such things? Zuko would _never_ do anything like that, and neither would I!"

This time, the room went completely silent. Katara bunched her fists and whirled around, glaring right back at all the people staring at her. Well, she'd already blown it and was likely to be run out of town in the next few seconds... it wasn't as if she had anything else left to lose. "Why are you even thinking such things? The Water Tribe doesn't want any of the Fire Nation, we just wanted the war to end! And Zuko! Why on earth would he want to hurt his own people?"

An old man who she hadn't seen before stood up in the far corner of the inn, his eyes glittering with something indescribable. "The traitor prince allied with the Avatar. Betrayed and dishonoured his country. How can we know what he will do next?"

It was a challenge, but Katara didn't even hear the hatred in his voice, so wrapped up was she in her own anger. "Are you sure we're talking about the same guy? Because believe me, the Zuko I know would never do that! Sure he can be an angry jerk. And as for betrayal? Believe me, I _know_," she laughed humourlessly. She'd forgiven, but that didn't mean that sometimes it still didn't hurt. "But everything that he's ever done has been for you people! He didn't betray the Fire Nation, he helped the Fire Nation by helping the Avatar! Don't you see?" she looked at the blank, hate-filled, uncomprehending faces around her and wished she could scream. "Look at you! I don't know what's wrong with this town, but what you're all suffering through isn't Zuko's fault. It's Ozai's! It's the war's! It's the war that's done this to you, that's taken away your livelihoods and brought this town to its knees, I've seen it before! And Zuko helped to stop that. He fought, bled, _nearly died_ for you all so that there could be peace. If anything, he's on your side and it's Ozai that you should be afraid of!"

It took her a second to realise that the teapots closest to her had shattered, spilling their tepid contents over the floor. The sight of them seemed to bring Katara back to her senses. Well. She was doing well for herself. _I just yelled at basically an entire town of Fire Nation people two days after the war._ _Good job, Katara. That will help them get rid of their hatred. Now they probably think all Water Tribe people are crazy as well._

Katara looked around, saw the frozen expressions on everyone's faces, and prepared herself to be run out of town, likely with pitchforks and other pointy objects. And then there was the husk of a voice clearing behind her, and the innkeeper spoke again.

"Lee, take the young lady up to her room, please."

It was as if the words were magic. Suddenly, everyone was moving again, clearly avoiding her gaze and settling back to their tables. At her side, the Fire Nation boy moved silently towards a narrow staircase that obviously took them up to the second level. She hesitated, torn between two warring halves of her instinct, and then deliberately chose the weaker, her chin strong and proud.

"Here," she said to the innkeeper, her voice loud enough to carry to all corners of the room. "For the teapots. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to break them."

And then she swept up after Lee, no hint of any weakness in her step, and she knew that they all watched her as she went.

All except for the Lee's mother, who stared at the two gold coins in her palm with pained eyes.

* * *

_Come on, water, work with me here!_

* * *

Lee was silent as he took her up the stairs, the old wood creaking beneath them. It opened up into a narrow corridor, small rooms branching off to the side. He gestured to the closest door on the right and she entered, him following close behind her.

The doorway opened into a tiny but cosy little place, the bed in the corner taking up most of the room. There was a chest of drawers beside it, an oil lamp that sat on its top. It seemed very much to be like the rest of the inn; old but clean, and she sank into the promising softness of the bed gratefully.

"Thanks for everything, Lee," she said, looking away from him. She felt him hovering in the doorway, uncertain, and then he straightened his shoulders and stepped in.

"Do you really know Fire Lord Zuko?" he asked quietly.

She started. Fire Lord Zuko... she'd completely forgotten that tomorrow was the day of his coronation, and suddenly she felt guilt crashing through her. She shouldn't be here right now, in this forsaken town far away from everyone she loved. She should be back in the Fire Nation helping Zuko, helping Aang, healing Sokka...

"Miss?"

His voice drew her back, and she smiled painfully up at him. "Sorry, what did you say again?"

The young boy looked at her silently, and then, "Do you really know Fire Lord Zuko? Are you... are you really the Avatar's waterbender?"

Katara shoved away all the guilt into a little compartment at the back of her mind, promising herself that she'd deal with it later. "Yes, I do, and yes I was," she said tiredly. "Why?"

He bit his lip, and then... "Could you tell me what happened two days ago in the Agni Kai arena?"

He looked so uncertain just standing there, never mind his Fire Nation pride, and so Katara patted the bed next to her and he sank hesitantly down. Then she explained it all to him in a quietly emotionless voice, never glossing over anything, not even Azula's death. She owed the princess that much, never mind that she still wasn't planning on dealing with it anytime soon.

When she was done, she glanced back to the boy, expecting to see the hatred downstairs reflected on his face. But instead, there was a smile, and she was taken aback.

"Lee?"

He swallowed, his gold eyes intense. "I knew it," he said huskily, proudly. "I knew that Tako was right."

"Tako?"

"My cousin," he explained, and this time when he looked at her she saw neither fear nor worry. "He sent word back yesterday about what had happened, he was one of the chosen people in the arena who survived."

_Who survived... _it was Katara's turn to swallow. There had been so many people she hadn't been able to save. "What did he say?"

"What you just told us. The Prince Zuko wasn't like he seemed, that he'd been honourable. When my mother heard, when the people downstairs heard they wouldn't believe it. Especially not Pauzon. That's why he was asking you about what Fire Lord Zuko would do next. But now we know it's all right, because you were there too! You..." his eyes went huge as the implications sunk it. "You were more than just there."

"You could say that," Katara looked down at her feet. But Lee didn't seem to have noticed.

"Wow, I can't believe I ever thought I could steal from you," he grinned, and when she looked up at him she laughed, the humour infectious.

"Well let that be a lesson to you," she teased. "Appearances can be deceiving."

The boy pulled back as if looking at her for the first time again, and then his grin grew wide. "You're real pretty," the boy said decisively, and as she blushed he continued. "You know, they call you Lady Katara. Even though we've heard all along about how you were the Avatar's waterbender, they still called you Lady Katara."

"Um... thanks?" she wasn't quite sure what it meant, but being called a lady couldn't be too bad, could it? He grinned again and then hopped off the bed.

"Anyway, I'd better be going back now to help my mother. Come down when you're ready for dinner!"

She almost reached out for him, too much of a duck-chicken to re-enter the lion-wolf's den. But he was already gone, and she lay herself tiredly back on the bed...

...

_After Paoi had left, she'd stayed huddled in the snow for a while, torn between blazing out and crying for real. And then Gran-Gran had come looking for her, and although she'd known the scolding was on the tip of her tongue, she also knew the moment that her grandmother had sensed something was wrong._

_It hadn't taken much to spill out the story. Just a few gentle prods. And then her anguish and the unfairness of it all came coming out._

_Gran-Gran knelt there patiently amongst the ice, her old eyes laden with so much wisdom it was almost painful. Katara finally stopped sobbing, her tears almost freezing on her cheeks as she nestled into her Grandmother's embrace. And then, when the silence was but complete except for the soft sigh of snow falling, she spoke._

"_Katara... there are many things that aren't fair in the world. And as you grow, you'll find more and more of them."_

"_But that's terrible!" she stamped her foot. "What am I supposed to do, just let it happen?"_

"_Some things we cannot change." _

"_But then what's the point to living?" she cried out, her thin voice a piping reed in the icy wilderness, the sound clawed away by the wind that was slowly beginning to pick up around them. "What's the point when it's just more terrible things that we can't fix, and more bad things that happen?"_

_The old woman didn't say anything for a long, long time. And in that space that stretched out to the distance, Katara thought of her mother, thought of how she'd been there and then she'd just... gone. She thought of creeping out of the tent one night, following the tracks and then finding her father on his knees facing the moon, the echoes of his anguished cries reverberating across the ice. She thought of Sokka fishing her out of the sea when she fell, thought of sea prunes and jelly not cooked by her mother. She thought of how she was the last waterbender in the South Pole._

_Fresh tears leaked out one by one, and then Gran-Gran spoke again, and it was "Hush Katara. Don't cry. There is always a time for crying, but now is not the time."_

_She sniffed. She hiccoughed through tears. "Why?"_

_Gran-Gran's free hand had found her own, and her mittens had clutched the fingers beneath tightly. "Because now is the moment that you learn that even amidst all the pain, all the unfairness, life can also bring hope. Because for every time we find something we can't change, there's another instance where we can. Where it's not impossible."_

"_How can you tell the difference?"_

_The old woman laughed. It sounded more like a sob amidst the howling wind. "You can't. That's why you have to always try. That's what's important. That you'll always try, you'll always dream, and you'll always recognised and make the choice to act when it comes to you."_

_Her voice was tiny. "What choice?"_

_And Gran-Gran hoisted her up to her feet and then up, and Katara clung around her shoulders and buried her face into her grandmother's neck as they began the walk home. "All choice. Any choice," Gran-Gran whispered into her granddaughter's ear. "You can't define it, Katara, because when the time comes, you'll find out that the choice can span the entire world, from Pole to Pole. Because every land is touched by water."_

...

"Every land is touched by water," she murmured, her eyes closed and seeing black. "What does that mean, what does that...?"

For a moment, Katara felt the oddest sensation, as if she were falling through nothingness. Reflexively, she jerked up again. Where was she?

Oh, right. The Moonrise inn. Katara's tired eyes found the bed underneath her and she sighed. She'd drifted off, how surprising was that? Although from the twilight outside, it couldn't have been for long...

Katara sighed again, and looked longingly at the pillow. She could have just curled up right then and there and nodded off back to sleep. She could have gone outside to the communal bath room and bathed. But hunger and... something else. An absence of fear. Yes, hunger and an absence of fear won over sleep, cleanliness, and sadness, and eventually Katara pushed herself off the bed and made her way back down to the taproom for dinner.

* * *

_I'm not leaving. I'm not giving up on these people._

* * *

There was a silence when she finally stepped into the room, but somehow she wasn't surprised. _Lady Katara, _she thought to herself grimly. _They call me Lady Katara, _and absurdly, that gave her enough strength to lift her chin high, find an empty seat in a not too crowded corner, and wait to be served. An old yellowed sheet lay on the table in front of her, its faded print declaring that Nioka's Moonrise Inn welcomed all and sundry to dine. She smiled wistfully at it, and then glanced up to see Lee's mother herself coming towards her.

The innkeeper bore a bowl of thick soup balanced on top of a plate with two pieces of bread on it, and a yellowish-white lump that she recognised with joy as butter. The cutlery was neatly stacked on the other side of the bowl, and Katara was already salivating when it was set down in front of her,

"Here, start off with this," Nioka said, not unkindly.

Katara accepted the steaming soup with a nod and thanks, and the innkeeper left. For an instant, the more paranoid part of her mind wondered if it'd been poisoned, and then she brushed it aside and picked up the spoon. She'd seen Nioka ladle it up from a communal pot, and she doubted that the innkeeper was willing to kill all of her guests just for one girl. A quiet voice rose up and told her that the innkeeper could have slipped it in later, but she shook her head and dipped the spoon into the stew. Acting like this would never do. Less than ten minutes ago she had been yelling at the woman, and now she was being given food and shelter instead of being run out of town like she probably deserved. _Welcome to Nioka's Moonrise Inn, _the placemat said. At the very least, she couldn't fault their hospitality, and so she resolved herself to abstain from any more stupid thoughts of fear. Bravely, she reached in and opened her mouth, and then...

"HOT!" she yelped, and someone next to her uttered a loud, hearty laugh. She was too busy sputtering and wiping tears away from her eyes to see who it was, and then a gentle but firm hand guided hers to a cup she hadn't noticed, and she took a long swallow of tea. It soothed the fire on her tongue for a moment, whatever herbs and leaves in there clearly concocted for the task, and she sighed in relief.

"Thank you," she said sheepishly, wiping her eyes as she turned to her saviour. And then she froze.

It was the old man from before, the one who had spoken for the entire room as he'd listed out Zuko's perceived crimes. A vague memory drifted up from just before. What had Lee called him? Pauzon? Her gaze turned wary as she studied him. He had a broad, open face lined with years, accentuated by the silver and grey strands mixing on his head. A rough piece of string circled his neck, whatever it was carrying lost amongst the big bushy beard spilling down to about midway down his chest. She could see how he was a farmer... he was certainly thickset enough to be one. But as she looked at him she realised that even if he had farmed, he would have had to have stopped working long ago because even sitting, he seemed stooped with arthritis. Still, he was no longer a mask of hate before her, there was just a strange distanced quality to his eyes, not unfriendly, but not friendly either. She wondered at how this was going to turn out.

"You're welcome," he responded to her, his voice deep and gravelly with chewed tobacco. Then he gestured back to her plate.

"You're meant to wait until it cools down a little first. Then alternate bites between the soup and the bread or tea. Both the butter and the drink will help with the bite."

"Thank you," she repeated, real gratitude weighing down her voice as she inclined her head towards him. The deference was near instinctive - they'd travelled long enough in the Fire Nation to know some of the customs now, and in the Water Tribes elders had always been respected. Still, she turned back towards her meal slowly enough to see his eyebrow quirk in surprise.

Well, this was going to be interesting. _Just don't yell at him again, and I'm sure it'll be fine._

Katara picked up her spoon again and set her shoulders, readying herself. Now that she knew what to expect, she was more hesitant about her mouthfuls. Her outburst had been more shock than anything... the chilli levels weren't above her tolerance. But combined with a still-steaming temperature and an unfortunately large mouthful that contained two of them, Katara was wise to be wary. This time she stirred the soup through, then cooled it with her breath before sipping tentatively. Her mouth was still tingling from the last bite, but as she ate slowly she began to appreciate the flavours. It was very, very different from stewed sea prunes on an iceberg, but there was an almost intoxicating richness to it that rushed down to her belly and spread warmth throughout her limbs. The measured sips of tea and shreds of buttered bread only drew out the tastes; she managed to identify cow-pig, and also a strange combination of rosemary and basil that set off the chilli surprisingly well.

"You're lucky. This is Nioka's specialty, she only makes it once a week."

Katara paused, spoon raised halfway to her appreciative mouth, and mentally downgraded the status of the situation from interesting to awkward. "I am lucky," she agreed, settling the spoon down and angling herself towards her neighbour. "It's delicious."

"Yes," Pauzon said, and gestured towards the rest of the taproom. "That's why most of the town is here tonight. Then again, there is not much place else we can go or do. And these days you never know if each day might be your last."

Katara's ears pricked, and she carefully swallowed down the rest of her soup, arranging her cutlery neatly in the empty bowl and wiping her mouth with the roughly folded napkin at the side. There was still a faint burn in her mouth, and so she lifted her cup in one hand, ready to sip. "What do you mean?" she asked.

He watched her inscrutably, just like she was watching him. "You are both right and wrong, you know," he said. "I don't know how much Lee has told you. The war has treated us unkindly, it is true... decades ago on a night like this there would be performances in the streets and crowds and economy to match. And we're certainly a lot poorer than we used to be. But in the last year, it's changed. Now, most of our produce goes to the soldiers in the mountains. Without that reliable revenue, we would be even more worse off."

Katara looked around at the drawn faces, the pinched looks of worry that stretched skin back over bone, and then back to him. "But it's more than that, isn't it?" she asked quietly. "You people seem like you're afraid of something. What is it?"

The old man put down his cup and hunched slightly over the table. "It is strange to think that we have an uneasy relationship with our own soldiers," he mused aloud, as if just talking about the weather. "And yet, these ones seem different. What are they doing out here in the mountains? Why aren't they in the capitol or the Earth Kingdom? It is a strange strategy to deploy one's troops in one's own lands when one keeps saying that the war has almost been won, isn't it?" Pauzon shrugged. "Then again, I'm no strategist. But I don't need to be. Most of them have been downright unfriendly every time they've come down here to buy stuff, and some families were even beginning to consider replacing the sons in the fields with the women so at least our girls aren't threatened. And then yesterday we found the first lot of wreckage."

Katara drew her breath in like a hiss. "What?"

"Houses, we think. Or what used to be. Just shreds of wood now, useless to anyone. But they were mostly burnt."

"A natural fire?" Katara asked uncertainly, and then regretted it the instant he fixed his glare on her. It felt like a schoolteacher reprimanding a slow student, and she shrivelled back into her seat. Then again, what had she been thinking? It was the Fire Nation they were talking about after all. Any natural fire that started could be put out in a blink if there was a firebender around.

"It must have drifted down from upstream, perhaps for a day or more. This is the main river on the island after all... most of our towns and villages are built close or even on it. Which means that one of them was probably attacked two or three days ago."

"But by who?"

Pauzon didn't seem to have heard her, but when he spoke he answered anyway. "Well, most of the Firebenders are in the army. And we know now that it wasn't either the traitor Prince or the Avatar, since that was when you were fighting Fire Lord Ozai. So..."

A sudden anger filled her at the implications. "Oh, so _now_ you know that it wasn't either Zuko or Aang? You shouldn't have thought like that in the first place! I've never seen either of them kill anyone... it's... it's just not in them, _especially_ Aang. We... we've _always_ tried to deal with things as peacefully as possible. Aang couldn't even bring himself to kill the Fire Lord! I mean, he's an Air Nomad for La's sake... the Fire Nation wiped out _his_ people, not the other way around! How can you accuse him of killing _anyone_?"

Pauzon's golden eyes, sharp as a dragon's, glittered. "What do you think happened when the Avatar destroyed most of our fleet at the North Pole?" he snapped, a low growl in his throat. "You're a Water Tribeswoman. You tell me how far men can swim weighed down in armour and in arctic water."

Katara put her cup down like it had just burnt her and swallowed. "Oh."

_Oh._

The look of horror on her face must have appeased him, or at least done something, because when he sat back, his face was no longer hard, just exhausted. "But then, that's neither here nor there, is it?" he asked softly. "What we're afraid of now is our own people. I've no doubt in my mind that it was the soldiers in the mountains who've done it, for whatever reason. And the leads me to the question, Miss Katara. What does the traitor prince plan to do next?"

She opened her mouth, ready to tell him. _He plans to rebuild the Fire Nation. He plans to restore the Fire Nation's honour. He plans to find his mother. He plans to survive. _But nothing came out. Things could have changed in the day since she'd left. Enough had changed in the second after Azula had died for Katara to appreciate how intransigent and unrelenting time was. Once it passed, you could never take it back.

"I don't know," she said honestly. "But what I do know of Zuko is that he loves the Fire Nation." _Possibly to the point of stupidity. It's the only thing that explains how someone like him with... with a... good heart, could ever have made the choices he did. _"And that means that he would never attack his own people like that."

Pauzon let out an unimpressed snort, but at least the old man wasn't spitting fire. "Well, we'll have to see then," he said gruffly. "I only hope that good fortune and grace be on our side."

A hand came up from beneath to grip something around his neck, a good luck charm perhaps, the cord lifting through the tendrils of beard. If Katara hadn't been watching so closely, she would have missed the flash of white and red. As it was, it took a few seconds for her to process what she'd seen, and then...

"Pauzon! May... may I see that?"

The old farmer startled and uncovered his hand instinctively, and that was when Katara's fingers darted forwards to save the wooden medallion from sinking back into his beard. But it wasn't the medallion itself that she was interested in, it was the figure carved and inked onto it.

The picture was clearly an angled image of a woman in battle stance, enough strands of her hair corded back to keep the rest of it out of her face, but the rest of her tresses flowing down around her neck and shoulders. Under the rope that was tied closely over her shoulders to allow her arms free movement, her over-shawl and sleeves were the purple of royalty. The dress beneath spilled down to almost mid-calf, the carved material stylistically voluminous and yet still split for convenience up to the waist. Katara could see flared out pants beneath and worn leather shoes.

But that wasn't what had caught her eye. Oh no. Slowly, she let her gaze travel upwards. There were clear differences - the style of the clothing was close, but adapted to the owner's combative stance. The hair wasn't loose, but had just enough braids to keep anything from flying into her face. The hat and the veil was tied to her back, the latter cascading gauzily down to around mid-thigh... leaving her moon-white face ethereal, shining and free beneath the red paint and the crescent sun.

"The Painted Lady," she whispered. "But how...?"

Pauzon suddenly smiled, and it seemed to take years off his grizzled countenance. "You know of the Painted Lady?"

Katara nodded and traced the outline of this woman, so different and yet so much the same. "I do. I was travelling in a village downstream of here... but she was different. They said she was a river spirit who protected their town, but it seemed she was mostly a healer... or, or something."

"Ah yes," Pauzon nodded sagely. "I know the town you speak of, but the Painted Lady certainly isn't as specific as that! No... you travel up and down this river, and let me tell you, it's quite a journey, and you'll see as many Painted Ladies as there are towns. Of course, the legends differ a little depending where you are. As you can see here, _our_ river spirit isn't so much a healer as... a guardian, a warrioress of sorts, I suppose."

Katara felt as if her heart was in her breath. "Tell me more?" she asked eagerly, and she watched with amazement as golden eyes softened, as lines smoothed and the grizzled old farmer actually smiled.

* * *

_Here's your chance, earthbenders! Take it, your fate is in your own hands!_

* * *

Katara woke early, refreshed, but still strangely tired. Despite being able to sleep on a bed instead of the ground, the late, late night lengthened by Pauzon's stories had somewhat counterbalanced the benefit. She smiled as she sat up, dressed, and began to comb her hair. He'd started off with the Painted Lady and her protection of the travelling merchant caravans from bandits, and then he'd gone on until he'd exhausted his repertoire of stories about the river spirit and began reciting older mythologies. It hadn't been long before the entire taproom had been enthralled, and the constant requests for this tale and that one had kept them up for hours. And then, after the stories she had offered to walk Pauzon home, since it wasn't far. They'd passed through the market square, one corner of which was still open. Perhaps it had been Lee's tale, perhaps it had been Pauzon's, but she'd found herself buying things, hoping her little contribution to this town's economy could go further than it seemed. Purple cloth, hessian rope, gauze... if Pauzon had been curious or suspicious, he hadn't said anything, even though she swore that she had seen a knowing glint in his eyes when she'd finally bade him farewell.

Katara finished brushing her hair and began to bundle the rest of her belongings together. Still, whatever he was thinking, it was completely wrong, she assured herself. She was just inspired, that's all. And it would do no harm to make a complementary set to the outfit she already owned... it was Pauzon's fault, anyway. He shouldn't have made the legends come alive in her mind, shouldn't have eased the ache deep down below her stomach with his stories. It was his fault if she got lost, she decided with an impish smile. She'd been depending on that roiling ball of uncertainty to guide her to wherever she was going to next. It wasn't that she didn't like this town. Certainly, the atmosphere seemed to have warmed up as the night went along. No one mentioned either the Avatar or Zuko again, and she hadn't brought up her money. And when she'd offered to help Pauzon back, there had even been some approving smiles.

But still, she had to keep moving. Calmed though the uncertainty within her had been, she knew without knowing how that the restlessness would grow soon, the vague feeling of not knowing where to go or what to do would guide her steps out of this town. She was almost sad to see it go.

Katara packed up quickly, she hadn't bought _that _much, and made it down in time for breakfast. When she'd finished the refreshingly light concoction of grains, she made her way to the innkeeper and pressed the rejected eight coins from the night before back into her palm.

"Keep it," she told Nioko quietly. "I mean it. It'll take some of the weight off while I walk."

The woman stared at the coins, then raised her eyes slowly to meet the young waterbender's face. "So you really are travelling by yourself?" Nioko demanded abruptly.

Katara nodded, and the innkeeper harrumphed. "Well, I'd say you should be careful. Tain't right for a young lady to be travelling alone in these times. Tell you what. After you leave here, you keep travelling on upstream. There's a great big waterfall a few hours walk from here, although it's more like three of them one after the other. The ledge between them is a nice safe resting point to the next town over for you, but I wouldn't keep going on to the next town today. It'll be dark by then, so just camp yourself there by those waterfalls."

Naoki turned away, and Katara felt a lump of surprised gratitude well up in her. _I was right not to give up on these people. _"Thank you," she said honestly. "So much, for everything. And thank you too, Lee," she nodded at the boy who was watching her from the kitchen with conflicted eyes. "Thank you."

"Now, now, you've said it enough times," Nioko began ushering her out the door brusquely. Katara laughed and complied, setting her sights upstream.

"You take care of yourself now!" the innkeeper hollered after her.

* * *

_It wasn't the coal, Katara. It was you._

* * *

Nioko's timing wasn't far off. It took her two hours to reach the falls, another hour to climb the path, and when she got there she was grateful that it hadn't just been Nioko's instructions guiding her there. The tightly wound coil of restlessness within her softened when she stepped into the small grassy glade. It was beautiful. There was no other word to describe it.

Exactly three waterfalls cascaded down the mountainside, the frothing cascades of each spilling into a pool of smooth but roiling water before flying over the next drop. Bottle-green vines clung tenaciously to the glistening rocks, their leaves swaying softly in the breeze. The roar of water filled every inch of her hearing, its constancy soothing to her fractured nerves. Katara set her bag down and inhaled, the air rendered sweet and clear by the foaming river and the lowly forested mountain. She could have climbed farther. She knew she could have. She could probably get to the next town if she hurried... but one look at the beauty before her and she knew that she wasn't going anywhere.

Perhaps it was the fact that she didn't need to go anywhere that made it so relaxing. Katara smiled, set up her tent, and then began languidly collecting sticks for a fire. The glade itself that she'd chosen was perfectly placed. A small copse of trees surrounded the near perfect circle of grass, just big enough to light a fire safely and set up one tent. From there, the closest pool was less than ten feet away, one side bubbly from the first waterfall, the other slipping and twirling over the edge of the second. She couldn't believe how perfect it was. She didn't have to run by a schedule, she didn't have to run by the fact that she needed to get as far away from the Fire Nation Capitol as possible before her friends tried to follow her. And best of all, the constant roar of the waterfalls and the odd spray of water on her skin was soothing the dull ache inside her. Katara smiled.

She found the spark rocks, lighted the fire, and watched it blaze brightly for a moment before settling down to a more enduring burn. She'd cook dinner on its embers tonight, she decided, looking around at her almost professional campsite. Her smile grew wider. Well, she had had a lot of practice.

But now, the rest of the day stretched ahead of her, and Katara just wanted to _play_. With a girlish squeal that she was glad nobody could hear, Katara cast away her black ninja garments and her blue overdress, stripping down to her light blue shift. Then she prepared herself for a running leap into the pool, lifting up her body in a graceful pirouette through the sky...

_No, not like this._

... and stopped.

Katara brought herself to a halt inches from the mirror-clear edge, sudden confusion crossing her face. What was that? She'd been all ready to have at least an hour of sheer play surrounded by her element, and then a voice had stopped her. And even more weirdly, it hadn't sounded like her own.

_Huh?_

Katara frowned and lowered her arms. Slowly, she walked to the edge of the pool until she could see her own wavy reflection. It stared back at her, just as confused, over a bed of smoothly eroded rock.

Time seemed to elongate slowly, like a ribbon of water drawn through the air, and so Katara couldn't tell how long she'd been standing there studying her own reflection before she began to notice the tiny currents in the pool. But when she did, she instantly bent closer, fascinated. She'd never really studied the movement of water like this, and certainly not against such a grand backdrop.

The force from the first waterfall pounded down on the rippled veneer, sending currents of water straight down into the deep end of the pool. From there, the currents were pushed to the edge by the water coming down behind it, sending white crests across the surface. And then the force of gravity and the push of the next fall pulled the water back to the middle, creating brief swirling vortexes before her eyes.

And suddenly, Katara realised that the pull deep within her, the eddying, restless force that had guided her steps and drained her energy, seemed to be pulsing in time to the water in front of her. Eyes wide, she stared at the rushing river. She wasn't sure what was happening, but suddenly the questions that had been haunting her flooded back with a vengeance.

_Why am I here?_

_What do I do now?_

_What do I want? _

Katara stared as hard as she could down at the water, as if its rippling depths somehow held the answer. And somewhere, at the sketchy edges of her consciousness, she heard a light, bubbling chuckle. _It does. _

If Katara had been completely clear headed, she would have likely hidden behind a Sokka-ism and dismissed it as her going crazy. As it was, though, the crash of the waterfalls, the rush of the waterfall, and the ache deep inside of her throbbed as one, and without knowing why, Katara found herself sitting down, crossing her legs into the lotus position, resting her hands on her knees, her eyes never leaving the water in front of her.

And then Katara took a deep breath and tried to still herself. It was funny... in all the time she'd travelled with the Gaang, she'd never tried to meditate. It had seemed unnatural to her to sit so still, when there was so much to do, so much to take care of. But she'd seen its effects on both Aang and Zuko, and she could feel the appeal of it now, as something heavy and soft swept over her body like a blanket. She had time. She had plenty of time, days that could stretch out into weeks and maybe even months.

It couldn't hurt.

So she sat cross-legged by the waterfall, her palms upturned on her knees, ready to slip into a state that might just enlighten her.

But nothing happened.

Five minutes later, Katara opened an annoyed eye and glanced around. Beneath her, one leg was going asleep and she shifted to allow the blood to flow again. She felt a bunching of cloth and wrinkled her nose. Maybe that was it. Maybe the Spirit World didn't like anyone entering when they had their monthly cycle? She wondered what spirit blood would be like, and whether it was hard to get the stains out...

Katara shook her head. _Wow, off-track, much? _It wasn't good that she was alone, she decided abruptly. It wasn't helping. She just wasn't used to it. She couldn't concentrate, she didn't know anything except that the swirling energy in her stomach was still pent up, still making her and her world jumpy and uncertain.

She wished she had someone to talk to.

Katara bolted up at that thought, her eyes narrowing. What was she thinking? That was the purpose of this entire trip, wasn't it? She needed time by herself... time she hadn't had since... well, forever. The Water Tribe was a close knit community, there was always something to do and someone to do it with. If it wasn't chores, it was playing amongst the snow and the prized sunlight. And then of course, her mother had left... Katara felt a small tightening at her throat... and then her father, and with each of their departures there was more and more to do and more and more years added to her that didn't need to be. Only fourteen... and yet she knew things that people three times her age shouldn't have to know.

And then, of course, Aang had come along. And after that it was months, a year, of taking care of them all, of making sure that everyone was fed and warm and the tents were up, of healing injuries and soothing hurts less physical. But most importantly of all, in her mind, was the knowledge that grew as they'd journeyed that if anyone was to threaten her family, they sure as hell had something coming to them. Because _no_ _one_ messed with a waterbending master's family and got away with it.

Katara let a small, weary smile cross her face, a smile that had far more to do with those whirlwind months than her few hours of sleep that morning. Ironically enough, the most time she'd gone alone during that time had probably been that night or day or whatever it was down in the Crystal Caverns. She'd had enough time to storm, to rage, to worry and to beat her useless fists against stone to last her a lifetime.

And then, the being-alone had ended, of course. By the arrival of a certain confused Fire Prince.

Katara shook her head and laughed. Strangely enough, it felt freeing. For the first time since she'd left the palace, she could sense the hugeness of the world around her. Spread out before her and the pool at her feet, the Fire Nation sprawled out into the distance, its borders marked by a rim of ocean blue. If she stared hard enough, she could almost see the adjoining islands that made up the country, each promising new and different paths. And around her, the roaring, heady waterfalls themselves spoke of the giant river that would its way throughout this main island and out to the entire ocean, the water extending a glimmering hand to her like a silent promise that she'd never felt as a small, helpless little girl in the South Pole.

Katara's smile widened and without realising it her eyes fell closed, naturally. It didn't matter why she'd chosen this. Fate and Destiny didn't rule her life any more. No Avatar's journey, no desperate fighting, no war dictated her path. She was Katara of the Southern Water Tribe, and she could choose her own way from here.

Amidst the rushing and thundering of the water, the freshness of the earth-scented air, the warmth of her tiny campfire and behind her closed eyelids, Katara suddenly saw a black and white flicker that matched the eddies of water she'd been studying earlier. Startled, she tried to concentrate on its blurriness, tried to make out exactly what it was. Slowly, a memory rose within her, both of sight and sound as she saw water and circling koi fish and heard a faint echo of Aang's voice, telling them what it had been like to enter the Spirit World so consciously that first time...

Katara felt a slow languidness steal over her body, a breath that seemed divorced from her actual flesh. Before her, the colours spun slower and slower, closer and closer to a rhythm that she couldn't control. At the very back of her mind, the part that was still conscious, she realised that she couldn't stop what was happening even if she wanted to, even if she tried. A minute ago she might have panicked. What did she know about the Spirit World except that it was dangerous, that it held both guides like past lives and loved ones and unspeakable terrors like Koh?

But it didn't matter. Katara watched the swirling colours and felt no fear. Because even though she had gone off on a journey to nowhere, even though she was alone and uncertain of what she was going to do next, and even though she was about to enter into a dangerous, unknown realm that she had no power or control over... she had never felt stronger in her life.

Katara breathed in, and then out. Unseen by her, the quickly rushing water in the river beside her followed her flow. And at that moment, just before she slipped into the mesmerising circling of yin and yang, if Katara had opened her eyes she would have seen the faint blue flicker of a young Fire Nation girl sitting besides her, her legs swinging freely over the rock.

-

-

-

* * *

A/N II: I must admit, I was torn between making this a giant, giant chapter and splitting it in two. I finally decided to go with the latter, because there was just no way I could fit everything in there without boggling my own mind. But yes... I was working on this late Saturday night and thinking that I could get out a cruddy version, but then I decided to take the extra day to give the idea in my head justice. (And I also needed time to look up Katara's various quotes. Lots of enjoyable time.)

I have to say that the idea of this fic was born in the events of this chapter, or at least the concept of it. I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it and its companion piece that should be out either next chapter of the chapter after. Thanks again for sticking with me, and please, do review. I don't think I've ever felt so close to a chapter before. It would do me a lot of good if I could hear some feedback on it. :)


	10. Katara Alone II

**Chapter 10: Katara Alone - II**

Disclaimer: Mike and Bryan, the show's creators, own Avatar: The Last Airbender, completely. I'm only showing my love of their world by playing in it.

A/N I: First of all, I'd really like to apologise for not updating last week. I only had time to post a few rewrites to the first, second and third chapters that I've been planning for a while... I'm afraid I've had an absolute killer of a month with assignments. Luckily, I've got somewhat of a breather now before the final plunge into one more major assessment and then exams, so here's the new, fully written chapter! Thanks for sticking with me, for your patience, and for your awesome responses last chapter! The reviews really kept me going with this one when it got too hard, so thanks to everyone!

* * *

_It doesn't matter if the Painted Lady isn't real, because your problems are real, and this river is real. - Katara  
Book III, Episode 3, The Painted Lady_

* * *

Colours.

They were the first things she saw - muted navys, swirling blues and ethereal whites that floated like eiderdown around her vision as she opened her eyes. The very air seemed to glow with them, pulsing in shade and time to the soft humming that filled her ears, as if somebody very, very far away was chanting an ancient song. An alien tranquility muted the underlying, trickling lullaby of the river she was standing ankle-deep in, bringing the sounds of nature and of spirit together in a delicate harmony.

Katara lifted a foot, and sunk it back down to the cold, clear bottom. The water was cold against her skin, as if it flowed from newly melted ice. Frosted leaves ghosted by her ankles as they were carried away by the current. And around her, water hung in the air as mist, a silent blanket shrouding the path ahead of her... and there was a path, she suddenly realised. A path made by the river itself, cutting through ancient woody roots and hoary trees whose branches disappeared into the fog like ghosts.

Katara lifted her arms almost by instinct, expecting the water to follow and carry her forwards. It took a few panicked seconds of nothing before she remembered; _Right. Aang had said that he couldn't bend in the Spirit World._

Which meant that she'd made it. She was here.,.

... now what?

Katara stepped forwards uncertainly, a little nervous in this water she couldn't control. _Good water. Nice water. _The foreign realm spread out before her, a vast, forested wood that reminded her somehow of the magical Swamp they had visited so long ago. And yet the stream running beneath her feet was crystal clear, and this time she had no objective, no goal she could think of. There was no Appa to find, no Sokka and Aang, no...

She swallowed and remembered the images, remembered the joy and then the crushing despair. _People you've lost, people you've loved._ The thought stopped her in her tracks, and all of a sudden the quiet, pristine beauty of the Spirit World seemed shadowy and threatening. What if it happened again? Only this time, there were no friends to back her up, no brother to chide and embrace in his solidness. For a moment, Katara wished she could bolt back into her body. But as fast as the fear rose up in her gut, so did it settle again. There didn't seem to be any threat here, none that she could pick up at least, and so Katara kept putting one foot in front of the other, unsure of where she was going until she began to realise something.

The current.

The current of the river was flowing uphill.

And at exactly the same moment, Katara realised that the slow, unsettled ache in her stomach which seemed to have churned within her forever had vanished, externalised somehow into the water itself. The gentle, insistent tugging that had unconsciously guided her restless steps was now the river, pulling her along in its current towards something else in this strange land. Suddenly sure again, Katara quickened her steps until, loss of bending or no, she seemed to be literally flying across the surface of the water. Behind her, wavy ripples spread from her delicate passage and pushed against the banks of the stream. Above her, the branches creaked in the wind, and once or twice she thought somebody called her name. Btu that was lost to her as she plunged eagerly ahead, trusting her instincts to navigate her around this strange world until she reached her destination...

... or perhaps, more accurately, a glittering dome of ice.

Katara stopped still as the woods around her arced out into a glade, the pristine grass so strangely familiar to the real life one she'd left behind with her body that she was struck. And then her eyes rose to meet the incongruous structure in the centre of the clearing, the perfectly elongated, frozen sphere beautiful but ridiculous amidst the muted greens of the forest.

It looked... rather like a circular ice lodge, and that was when her eyes widened in remembrance. Years ago, there had been an ice lodge in her village, before they'd been reduced to a pitiful collection of tents. It had been the central meeting place for the elders, where her father had presided as Chieftain. Now a real smile lit her face as she stepped forwards to meet its unbroken walls, her hand lifting up almost instinctively. Inexplicably, there was a low shudder, and then a section of ice slid away at the movement. Unquestioning, Katara glided through without looking back, the strangest feeling that she was coming home settling in her heart.

Which was how she missed the orange and yellow blur bounce against the reformed wall moments later.

Still, even if she had turned around, it was questionable whether she could have done anything about it. Now that she was within the ice, the familiar cold of the Poles enveloped her, broadening her smile. Although she couldn't see any opening or window to break the darkness, the interior nonetheless shone with an intensely soft blue light, one that reminded her briefly of the sacred place in the Northern Water Tribes. The light cast a gentle, ephemeral illumination over the inside of the ice lodge, widening her eyes as much as her smile.

Katara had stepped out from a short, thickly iced corridor into the main room of the Lodge. It was easily as big as Appa himself, perhaps double his size, and yet it felt peculiarly cozy and insulated from any outside threat. Soft rugs covered the floor, a pile of furs in the corner clearly serving as a bed fit for Southern Water Tribe luxury. On the left side, a small fountain trickled out of the wall of the ice lodge itself, the water collecting in a small, brimming, crystal clear pool that begged her to play with it. On the right, a small fireplace glowed with warmth, taking off the chilling bite to the air. Katara couldn't believe her eyes. True, her family wasn't there, and it was nothing like she could remember of either the Southern or the Northern Water Tribes, but the settled calm in her stomach told her this was home. Before she could stop herself, Katara was sailing forwards with a happy yell and burying herself in the pile of furs. Their caress hugged her back, smooth and reassuring, and she rolled herself in them with delighted abandon, feeling truly taken care of for what seemed to be the first time in forever. With a contented sigh, Katara closed her eyes. She could sleep like this forever...

Behind her eyelids, she saw a sudden burst of brilliant white light, and then a tinkling laugh broke into her consciousness. "You like it, then?"

Katara's eyes snapped open. "Yue!"

The moon spirit was still hovering in the air when the waterbender leapt up and hugged her, the weight dragging them both to the floor. Yue smiled in amusement as she hugged her back. Any other of her people would probably have prostrated themselves before her first, but this particular kinswoman could be forgiven for her familiarity.

"Yue! I can't believe it's you! How - how have you been?" Katara asked giddily, giggling as she finally let the former Northern Water Tribe Princess go.

Yue laughed. "I've been around," she smiled, it was the ageless wisdom in her face that made Katara suddenly remember exactly who she was talking to.

"Oh!" Katara's mouth opened up into a perfect circle, and then she backed quickly away from her friend and knelt low to the floor. "I'm so sorry, I forgot and I..."

The moon spirit's beautiful laugh broke through her apologies. "Get up, Katara," Yue said warmly, settling herself delicately on the floor. "You don't have to do that to me. We're family."

Katara pinked, hastily getting back to her feet in automatic obedience. "We... we are?"

"Well, not in the literal sense," she laughed again, and it was truly like music. Katara beamed back at her; it was good to see as well, that Yue could laugh. When she'd been alive, she hadn't done it nearly enough. "But you are one of my favourite waterbenders, so I'm sure that counts."

Katara grinned back, hesitantly. "Really?"

Yue nodded, and spread her arms wide as if she were embracing the earth. "I can feel everyone who draws their power from me, especially at night. That's how I've been keeping track of you all," her answering smile was warm and radiant. "You've done well, Katara. I'm proud of you."

At that, Katara's grin suddenly faltered. "I…" she looked down, suddenly ashamed. "I killed someone, Yue."

The moon spirit tilted her head, oddly. While a part of her was still Yue, still the Northern Water Tribe Princess, she was also more… a consciousness thousands of year old, a spirit who saw everything that happened at night, and much more besides. "I know. But that doesn't change the fact that you fulfilled your duty, Katara, that doesn't change…"

"But it does!" she couldn't stop herself from bursting out, real tears beginning to blur her vision again. Somehow in this world, in this safe cocoon that felt like home, she knew that she didn't have to pretend or be strong. "It does change things... I..." she shook her head, confused. "My duty?"

"Your duty to Aang, to the Avatar," Yue clarified. "When you fought to keep Prince Zuko alive and to defeat Princess Azula, you fulfilled your final part in this war."

Katara stepped back a little, let the words wash over her, and then fell back to the floor. She landed with a thump on the furs, but this time, their softness seemed unyielding. "Fulfilled," she said slowly, somehow not surprised. She'd know that, hadn't she? Deep inside, she'd known that after the end, after the battle, there was no part left for her to play. Aang had to keep on being the Avatar, yes. Zuko had to become Fire Lord. But for the rest of them...

"Fulfilled," she repeated. "Over." It seemed impossible. "But then..." she remembered Zuko's simple question, poised so delicately in the night. _What are you going to do, after this?_ She remembered thoughts of a faceless future, and frowned. "But then where does that leave me?"

_A murderer?_

She winced at the harshness of the thought, and it seemed that Yue had somehow heard it too, for the moon spirit's face hardened. "No. You are so much more than that, Katara. Only you can allow yourself to be reduced to a murderer, and you haven't yet."

"Haven't I?" Katara asked bitterly, clasping her knees to her chest. "She died in my arms, Yue. I could have saved her."

"Katara," Yue's voice echoed inhumanly this time, and the silver light that had vanished from her presence shone brightly again, suffusing her with incandescent energy and wisdom aeons old. "Death is part of the way of things. It is part of the balance. As we live, so we must die. Yin and Yang, Dark and Light, Earth and Air, Fire and Water, Life and Death. Each requires the other to be real. Senseless death is murder, yes. Needless death is slaughter, yes. But what you did was neither senseless nor needless."

Katara shook her head uncomprehendingly. "But that's like saying I should despair as much as I hope."

She was still so young, so very young. Yue's eyes softened as they travelled over her friend. At the time of her own death, Yue had only been two years older, but now there was more than a millennia of difference, and the moon spirit could feel it, taste it, see it. Defiance, disbelief, and misunderstanding trembled from every vein of Katara's body, and in the vestiges of her mind, where the most powerful shreds of her remembered humanity still resided, Yue felt a heaviness in her chest. They'd all been so young, even Sokka, and the burden had been so great. But now, if the girl in front of her was to choose her own destiny in the tumultuous future that lay ahead, she would have to understand, and understand soon.

"There is a difference, Katara," she said gently. "A great difference which perhaps you will learn in time. I will say this, though; never give up your hope. It is one of your greatest strengths. But surrender your guilt; it will block you from achieving your full power," the tiniest hint of a smile emerged from her again, and the iridescent light surrounding her shone brighter like the new moon. "And believe me, you have much potential."

A sudden thought crossed Katara's mind at that, and she furrowed her brow before she spoke again. "Like the bloodbending?" she asked in a small voice. "I... I managed to do it on the day of the comet, even when it wasn't the full moon. H-how?"

Yue glowed gently, powerfully. "Everyone often forgets that even while the sun shines, the moon is still present. Our people can bend during the day, even if it is often weaker. But you are right, bloodbending is exceptionally powerful, but you have shown that it is a power within you that you can access, especially when your loved ones are in danger or your determination and emotion is allowed free reign without guilt." And even though she managed to say it so dispassionately, so clearly, Yue had to marvel at just how strong the small girl in front of her really was. "That means that if you are strong and sure enough inside, you do not need the full moon to augment your power, you can do it yourself. Perhaps in time, when you learn to be more in balance with yourself and free yourself from needless guilt, you may be able to do it at will, whether I am at full strength or newborn, whether it is day or night."

Yue paused. _And that truly is remarkable_, "So how? It is because you have proven yourself to be a bloodbender, Katara. A powerful one."

And Katara, who'd gone pale throughout the moon spirit's explanation, bit her lip ad remembered Hama, remembered the puppets, remembered the hatred surging through her own veins as she spun and wove and froze her way inside the innocent Southern Raiders' leader, and then again her desperation with Azula._ Congratulations, Katara, you're a Bloodbender_. "But I don't want to be," the words burst out of her mouth, and she bowed her head in shame. "I don't, I-I can't."

The moon spirit froze, hovering now in the air as her silver light retreated to a gentle shimmer. "But you are," she stated quietly, as if it was the simplest thing in the world. "You are a bloodbender Katara, and that is something you cannot change."

Katara said nothing, but she kept her head bowed and stubborn against the gentle rebuke. Stray curls of hair that had escaped from her plait brushed her forehead, and for a moment she looked even younger than her fourteen, almost fifteen years. Yue sighed, low and deep, and it was heartbreaking against the walls still echoing with the beauty of her remembered laughter. "To understand where you are, who you are, you must understand _what_ you are," she explained. "You are vengeance as much as you are protection, fear as much as you are hope, anger and hatred as much as you are calm and love. Your power comes out of the push and pull of your opposite sides. And you cannot reject either the light or the dark, otherwise you are denying both yourself and your potential."

Katara gulped. As much as she wanted to struggle against it, to stubbornly deny the images of hate and revenge, of anger and blood, Yue's words made so much implicit sense that it hurt. It struck to the heart of everything she had ever learnt with her waterbending, defense effortlessly becoming her offense in the push and pull of her element. Katara shook her head and tried to concentrate on the end conclusion of the reasoning. "My power?"

"Yes," Yue confirmed, smiling softly again. If only the girl truly knew... "Yet that is not a question for me to answer. I came first to ease you into this world, my sister, to tell you that you had fulfilled your duty and to help you understand where it has left you. But she who will come next will guide you as to your more immediate concerns, and then she who comes after will advise you on your future."

Katara's brow furrowed. "Guides? Advisers? Why does this sound like one of Aang's Avatar journeys?"

Yue chuckled lightly. "The Avatar is not the only one with access to the Spirit World. When the time is right, when the forces are aligned, people like yourself can also make the transition to find their path. The Spirit World is rest for the dead, but in its depths and mysteries, it is also a labyrinth for the living to discover, to understand, to evolve... isn't that why you travelled here?"

Katara bit her lip and looked at her feet. "I don't know why I came here," she admitted softly, before straightening. "Although I think... it was a voice. It was something. A feeling. I don't... I don't know," she concluded helplessly. "I just don't know."

Yue shook her head, warning falling across her features. "You will not be able to answer like that forever."

The waterbender swallowed. "I know."

"Good," the moon spirit glowed suddenly, and then began to shimmer. Slowly, her light dimmed, until Yue herself became transparent as she faded away to another dimension. "Be well then, Katara, and remember that your past duty has been fulfilled. But it is you who will decided where your story goes from here. However you choose, I know we will meet again."

"Wait!" Katara scrambled to her feet, sudden panic setting into her. "But I have so much to ask you! I mean, if my duty's fulfilled, where do I go now? How do I decide? What do I decide? Yue?!"

But the moon spirit was gone, vacant air where her splendour once shone. Katara gazed at the empty spot with a dull elation in her heart. The sense of closure that Yue's words had brought had only confirmed what she'd been feeling these last few days, this restlessness and uncertainty. Now your destinies are intertwined with his, Gran-Gran had said. But with the war over, so was destiny, at least for her.

"Yue," she said aloud, half-begging to the empty air even as she knew that no-one would reply. "What do I do now?"

A low chuckle sounded from behind her. "Perhaps I can help with that."

* * *

_You think you're any different from me, or your friends, or from this tree? If you listen hard enough, you can hear every living thing, breathing together._

* * *

Kama shifted uncomfortably in the seat that she'd been assigned to, a gesture of decency and thoughtfulness that she hadn't expected after so long. Beside her, she could feel Kata sitting stiff and straight, obviously as on edge as she was. She reached out a hand, careful not to move too quickly lest the guard interpret it wrongly, and squeezed her sister's fingertips. There was a pause, a slack, and then Kata's nerveless fingers grasped hers back.

Kama sighed shakily, and one of the Earth Kingdom men sitting next to her huffed. "It'll be all right," he said, but his voice sounded husky and unconvinced. Kama merely mutely nodded, grateful for the thought and feeling an instant bond spring up between a fellow prisoner. And so it was Kata who responded, her voice frighteningly devoid of any emotion as she gazed up at the platform where the Fire Prince would arrive.

"It'll never be all right," the older woman whispered. "Never."

There was an uncomfortable shifting silence among the small group, overborne and overweighed by the nervous chattering amongst the Fire Nation people milling around them. Kama shifted again, her mind on overdrive as she noted how many guards there were, how many crimson-stained people she could count. It was the first time since she'd been taken over forty years ago that she'd seen so many people. And her experiences since then had not made her very well-disposed at all to anyone dressed in red. Kama tightened her grip on her sister's hands and tried very hard not to think of her hate, not to think of the bitterness and the loathing welling up inside of her, and...

"Coming through, coming through!" sang out an obnoxiously cheerful, loud voice. Kama snapped herself from her thoughts, shrinking back on her chair as she saw the mostly blood-coloured crowd shift... to reveal someone who was obviously a fellow Water Tribesmen. Kama's eyes widened as he sailed through on two makeshift crutches, an Earth Kingdom warrior in full battle regalia following closely at his heels. The pair were almost on top of them when she realised with a start that they were deliberately heading in their direction.

"Oh, hey!" the boy swung around on his crutches, his smile faltering as his eyes met their own. "I'm Sokka, and this is Suki. Zu-... ah, the Fire Prince, um, Lord guy sent us down to make sure you were all right."

It was the Earth general beside her who spoke first, his voice dry and raspy as he stared at the Earth Kingdom girl's outfit. "What are you doing here?" he demanded. "What are the Kyoshi warriors doing here, did they capture you too?"

The girl smiled beneath her battle paint. "Oh, they captured me all right," she said dryly. "But then Sokka over here helped to bust me out. And then we helped end the war, so I guess the rest of the Kyoshi warriors should be free soon too!"

"The war..." Kama was surprised to hear herself speak. Her voice was rusty from disuse, and she swallowed quickly again to try to bring it back. "The war... it's really over?"

She hadn't believed the Fire Nation youth when he'd come, even when he'd ordered the guards to unwind their chains and to open the door with a strained expression on his face. How could she have? It could have so easily been just another sick trick, a new game of torture that the sick devils of the Fire had devised. And yet, now... coming from someone else's mouth...

"Yes," the boy Sokka said, a wide grin encompassing his browned face. "The war really is over." Kama felt his eyes wander across their features, drinking in the evidence of all of their pain and suffering, and saw pity battle with sadness across his face as his grin slowly faded away. "It's over. Finished. Gone."

Kama felt her sister move beside her, and then the older waterbender trembled. "Then what does the Fire Prince want with us?" Kata spat out, her voice harsh. "Why are we here? Why haven't we been sent home, why haven't we been set free?"

"But you have," Suki hastened to reassure her. "It's just that Zu- the Fire Prince wanted you to see the coronation," she leaned back to address them all, this small group of Earth and Water who had been burnt so much by the flame. "He wanted to show to all three remaining nations that it truly was over - wanted to show that we were ready to start working together towards proper peace and..."

"Together?" demanded one of the Earth Kingdom people in disbelief. "Peace? Is this Fire Prince as crazy as the rest of his ilk? Because I can promise you, there will be no peace, there will only be blood and revenge for our families and..."

The rest of his words were drowned out by the echoing ripple of agreement amongst them, and Kama watched as the Water Tribe boy swallowed.

"I know," he said, his words heartfelt as he sagged on his crutches. Kama felt her eyes be drawn to the cast on his leg, studying the angle of it with expert eyes. A serious break, she decided instinctively, but one which had been well tended. "The Fire Nation's done some terrible things, believe me I know. They," he swallowed again, "They took my mother away from me and my sister. They split up my family. They've put me through hell for most of my life, but it's over now, don't you see? Zuko isn't like his father. The Fire Nation you fought isn't the same Fire Nation as it is now. And we have to work together, otherwise everything you and I have fought for, all the lives lost for peace... everything will be in vain."

"Everything will be in vain until every last piece of Fire Nation scum lies dead on the earth!" another Earth Kingdom man hissed, and there was calls of agreement once again. Kama saw despair cross over Sokka's face as he raised one crutch ineffectually for quiet. "Please, you have to understand. Things have changed, they..."

He was interrupted by a sudden crash of metal, the sonorous sound rippling across the crowd like a wave. Instantly, everyone stopped speaking, and in the hush of the crowd, a single voice shouted out his announcement.

"Fire Prince Zuko!"

The silence that followed the gong stretched out beyond belief. For at least half a minute, the crowd held their breath as they watched the still, unmoving hanging, waiting for the Prince to emerge. And then, when there was still nothing, a voiceless tension began to creep over them, sinking its claws into their skin one by one.

"La, I hope Zuko's all right," the boy, Sokka muttered. Kama watched how his eyes fixed on the flame-embroidered curtain, true worry in his gaze. "I hope nothing's happened."

The Earth girl, Suki, murmured something conciliatory, and suddenly Kama wished savagely that something had happened. Wished with all her heart that the Fire Lord was in trouble, that he was suffering as much as her people had suffered, as much as her sister had suffered, as much as she had suffered. Wished with a devastating vengeance trembling in her blood that he would know what it felt like to burn... and she felt her fingers clench in hate just as the cloth finally swayed and the man himself stepped out to greet his subjects.

The words came to her as if from a distance as she gazed at him, fixed.

"Oh thank Tui," she heard the boy, Sokka breathe. "He's all right. But hang on, why are Mai and Shen Li with him, that wasn't part of the plan..."

The Kyoshi warrior whispered something back to him, but by then Kama was no longer focusing on their conversation. Kama shook with rage as she stared at him, this mythical being who had destroyed her life. She couldn't believe it. After all this time, he was finally there right in front of her, and she...

The first thing that struck her was how pale he was, how golden his eyes were, how perfect his topknot. Each and every feature screamed at her that he was Fire Nation, one of the enemy, and she knew without looking that furious recognition was etched across Kata's face as well.

And the second thing that struck her was the scar.

It ate its way across his face, devouring nearly half of his handsomeness in livid, angry red, and the rusty healer in her heart quailed in sympathy at the pain he must have felt. Suddenly she was as uncertain as she was hateful, as this boy walked forwards in his gold and red robes, the youth who'd freed them and the knife-sharp girl following him. Because he didn't look like she'd always imagined the Fire Lord. He looked...

Kama swallowed. _Things have changed_, she remembered the youth saying as he'd watched them with sad eyes. And then again, the boy from her own tribe as he'd stared at them. _Things have changed._

She looked up at the Fire Prince, saw two halves of the world collide in the soundless hush of the courtyard, and had to agree.

* * *

_You never know how things are going to work out, but if you keep an open mind and an open heart, I promise you will find your own destiny someday. Iroh - Book III, Episode 12, The Western Air Temple._

* * *

Somehow, Katara wasn't surprised when she spun around to see pale robes and a rope shawl, and blood-red paint against a ghost-white face. "Painted Lady," she murmured, bowing low almost instinctively this time.

The Spirit hovered in the air, skimming centimetres from the ground as she approached. The billows of mist that accompanied her seemed strange in the frozen clarity of the ice lodge, and yet somehow wholly appropriate. As Yue shone silver, so did the Painted Lady shine white and come with the spiritual wisps of her river, and Katara found herself wondering what the next one would be like.

"Welcome, waterbender," the spirit replied, her voice acquiring a sonorous, bell-like tone amidst the ice. "You have travelled far in such few days."

Katara shrugged helplessly, desperation and discomfort at her own uncertainty making her honest. "And yet it doesn't feel like I've gotten anywhere," she said lamely. "I still don't know how I can possibly deal with what I've done. And now it's all over, I'm not sure what I'm supposed to do." She took a deep breath. "I... I didn't enjoy the war. It was terrible. It killed so many people, and it ruined so many lives so stupidly. But it did give us a goal," she lowered her head. "It gave me a direction. Before the war ended, there was always a purpose to everything, somewhere I could aim for, something to justify me going to bed late every night and rising as early as possible to take care of everyone... to cook, to mend, to heal, to fight. Something to pour my heart and soul into. And then before that, I had to take care of our village with Sokka, and everything I had I poured into that as well. And then..."

She swallowed, bowed her head and continued, her voice sinking down to a pained whisper. "And then before that, I had to be Mum."

There was a slow silence, broken only by Katara's hoarse breathing, and then the Painted Lady drifted closer, "And now?"

Katara twisted her lips into a self-mocking smile. Wasn't that the million gold piece question? And ah, repetition, repetition, and useless repetition. "I don't know."

The river spirit lifted her head, a ghostly wind stroking her midnight hair. "Many people go through their lives never knowing," she acknowledged soberly. "They drift through the currents of life like wreckage. And yet, you cannot afford that now," her voice grew stronger, more commanding, like the great waterfalls themselves. "You have acknowledged your power, and so you are ready to choose. That is why you are here."

Katara gulped, the sudden sensation of being put on the spot overwhelming her. "But I thought Yue said it was my decision, so doesn't that mean,?"

"It is and always has been your decision," the Painted Lady said firmly. "But your decision is still governed by circumstance. Your choice to follow the Avatar intertwined your destiny with his, but it was forced at that moment he was taken by the Fire Nation. Now you have reached yet another crossroads where you must choose, only this time it is much less clear-cut."

Katara snorted. "I know that," she said dryly. "But I still, I don't... you're right, this is different. This time it's not a choice between learning waterbending and staying where it was safe. This time, it feels like it's about the rest of my life, my own life for once, and I just..."

With nowhere to look to, Katara looked down at her hands. In the refracted, spiritual light of the ice lodge, the lines that stretched across them were thrown in sharp relief. Some had been etched there since birth, a tale waiting to be told. Others had been worn in through her work, her healing and her fighting, and she clenched her fingers around them as if to keep them from escaping, from leaving her just a simple water peasant destined to live out a quiet life on the floes. But even hidden, their image remained burned onto her retinas, reminding her that she had the hands of a warrior, a healer, a mother.

Katara unfurled her fingers again, and then placed them down onto her lap, smoothing out the nonexistent wrinkles in her blue shift. "I don't know exactly where I'm going," she admitted, and although it was an echo of every frustration she'd voiced previously in the last few days, this time the memory of her hands made it subtly stronger. "I don't know exactly what I'm going to do."

The Painted Lady said nothing, waiting patiently for her to continue. Katara took a deep breath. "But I... I do know something. I know that I want to help people. I want to use whatever powers I have to... to give hope. I want to," she lowered her gaze as she finally admitted it to herself, admitted things she had forgotten in the last few months, when their ungainly group had grown into a bunch of children that she'd had to take care of. "I want to remember who I am. I want to find out if that's... changed." _She died in my arms._ "I want to keep fighting for what I believe. I just don't know how.

A thin smile knifed the Painted Lady's mouth. "Good," she said grimly. "Then I will show you what you can do."

Katara blinked. Whatever she'd been expecting, it certainly hadn't been that. "Huh?" she tilted her face back, just in time to see the river spirit swirl forwards impossibly fast and lay her ghostly fingers on Katara's forehead, and...

_Katara saw herself. She saw herself nursing a small trail of shining liquid to a terrible, terrible wound on Aang's chest and saw him cough back to life. She saw herself cold and armed for revenge, clad in black shadow with another by her side as she strung a man's movements like a puppet. And then she was hurtled from the past to the future... Katara saw herself arcing water through the air to slice through armour with her left hand, saw a twin trail of viscous red liquid twirl in her other. She gagged quietly as she realised exactly what it was, but then the picture broadened. She saw herself on a battlefield, in a palace, in the mountains, at the Poles. She saw a warrior, a healer, a fighter, a doctor. And then the images blurred and were replaced, and the young girl standing by the riverside was replaced by an older woman with long black hair and pale skin, who dived deep into the water, cutting it as cleanly as a knife. She saw the gold crescent as homage to both the sun and the moon who overlooked the river, saw the red marks start off as paint, and then merge briefly into blood during a civil war that turned island against island in this ancient land that would become the Fire Nation. And then she saw the same woman kneeling by a bedside, easing out a bawling baby covered with blood and water, saw life come from the caverns and the light of joy spring from the exhaustion and pain in the mother's face. And then Katara saw the river itself, spread out in a glittering expanse, saw it giving life and succour at its mouth and yet also saw people drowning along the way, pulled forever into the water's embrace. She saw it bubble steadily from a spring high in the mountains, saw it gush over rock and earth in waterfalls, saw it eddy gently and calmly in pools before flowing steadily out to sea. And then she saw water evaporate in the sun, saw it ghost down as rain to rejoin the river once more, an endless cycle that pushed and pulled, always in balance..._

_Life and death. Blood and water. Black and white..._

The Painted Lady's eyes were the first thing Katara saw when she opened her own. Their golden warmth calmed her as she shook her head groggily, trying to process everything that she'd seen. The contradictory images seemed to clash in her mind, as sharply cut against one another as the river spirit's red marks stood against her white face. Katara shuddered.

"I don't understand," she finally said haltingly, confusion still flickering across her vision. "How did, how does...?"

The river spirit shifted, her gauzy veil fluttering away to reveal the starkness of her features. "To understand what you can do, you must understand what you are," she explained, her words a strange echo of Yue's. "Just like water can be the river, the sea, the spring and the rain and yet still be one, so can you yourself be many different things in a single, more powerful whole. Like me, you are fighter as much as you are healer, a mother as much as you are a child. You cannot compartmentalise yourself into one or the other; to reach your fullest potential, you must acknowledge and accept all of them. And then, you can harness your true powers and potential in your battles, for you will know when and how to use each of your skills."

Katara nodded slowly. "My battles?"

The river spirit didn't move, but all of a sudden the little pool by the edge of the ice lodge shimmered, became translucent, and then gave way to an image. Katara stood shakily to see it. Through the distortion of the ripples, she saw a blue-clad girl sitting by three waterfalls, a makeshift campsite behind her. She was about to open her mouth when she saw what was different from the scenario she had left... where her bag had been closed, it now lay open... and more importantly, the materials she had bought at the market were no longer just pieces of cloth, they were clothing, armour...

Katara spun around to meet the smiling face of the Painted Lady. "You bought them with a reason, whether you knew it or not," the river spirit said. "The design is your own - I have merely assembled them for you."

The waterbender wet her lips, feeling an odd sensation welling up in her stomach. "My choice?" she asked, even though it was more of a rhetorical question than anything. She had made her choice so long ago, she just hadn't recognised the new form it had come in.

It hit her with a sudden rush, how clueless she'd been when the answer had been staring her in the face all along. Yes, the war was over. Yes, she was no longer tied to Aang, or to anyone, really, if she chose it. Yes, she was hurt and confused, lost in what it meant to be Katara when the Katara she knew had killed someone.

But that didn't change the one fundamental thing about her. _I will never turn my back on the people who need me._ The river spirit hadn't said the exact words, but she hadn't needed to._ I will show you what you can do. _There would always be those she could help, and with the image of the spirit-made raiment gazing back at her, she knew they were close by. But more importantly, she knew that what had thrown her was the vast ocean of possibilities suddenly available to her after such a narrow scope of bittersweet agency, caught up in someone else's destiny even though she knew she'd played a vital part. And yet nothing had changed. Because when she'd had the freedom to choose, she'd chosen to stay and heal the people in the Fire Nation infirmaries. And now...

_The design is your own - I have merely assembled them for you._ Now she truly understood what it meant to have her own destiny in her hands, just how she could channel her own power and it was less frightening than it was freeing. The idea was overwhelming, but it gave her a sudden giddy rush of joy and certainty. Purpose. Striking her own path and taking life as it came wasn't nearly as clear-cut as bringing down the Fire Lord before he destroyed the world, but the world was a different place now, and it would be enough. The image of the clothes was a promise, and she almost burst into a cry of sheer joy before she remembered exactly whose company she was sharing. "You don't mind?" Katara asked carefully, suddenly aware of the insult it might pose.

The Painted Lady inclined her head. "It is an honour," she replied solemnly. "Bear my title and wear my garments in your own way for now. But I would not be surprised if in the future, your name becomes a legend in its own."

"A legend?" Katara laughed at the unexpectedness of the word, pushing back a few wisps of hair around her ears sheepishly. "I don't feel very legendary."

The river spirit raised an eyebrow, and Katara blundered on. "I-I mean, the Avatar is legendary. Even the Fire Lord is legendary. Me? I'm just..." she sighed through her nose. "Despite what you say, I'm still just a water peasant."

The Painted Lady river began to flicker at the edges, even as se shook her head in disagreement. "And I was just the daughter of a healer and a soldier who lived by the riverside," she replied. "It is what you will make of your future who will make you who you are. And I am not the one who will help you with that."

Katara's ears pricked. "Who?" she asked, her heart suddenly leaping into her mouth, but the Painted Lady was already fading away behind her billows of mist, her enigmatic smile serving as her only farewell.

And Katara felt another presence at her back, one which unfolded uncertainly like the most beautiful flower in the world, a panda lily that bloomed only once every three seasons. It grew delicately, tremulously, until it descended into reality, and Katara didn't know whether to laugh or cry, didn't know whether to doubt or believe...

And so she settled for just turning around, slowly, her eyes travelling up from the ground to the familiar blue overcoat, the beaded designs, the careworn hands, tracing each detail with agonising slowness until she reached her visitor's face.

"Mom," Katara said softly.

* * *

"You are never doing that again! Do you hear me?!"

He had been floating in pleasant darkness, gradually regaining the feeling in his corporeal body. But then his consciousness slammed into place when the earth-shattering shriek sounded in his left ear. With a start, Aang's eyes snapped open and he jerked up. "T-Toph?" he asked groggily.

"Who else?" she snapped angrily. "Snoozles and Fan-Girl? Of course it's me, Twinkletoes, and you are never doing that again!"

With a groan, the Avatar rubbed his bald head and sat up properly. The movement pushed him against bony knees, and he almost fell off Appa when he realised he was still nestled in Toph's lap. As it was, his hasty scramble sent him over to the other side of the saddle faster than Toph's unseeing eyes could blink. "Um, sorry! I... I didn't meant to, uh..."

Toph's eyes narrowed dangerously. "You didn't mean to? Oh I think you did! Last time I checked, you can't just accidentally start yelling about Katara and then pop into the Spirit's World without a moment's notice!"

Aang coughed, but her words brought back his memories and in turn, made him realise exactly how much fear underlaid his earthbending teacher's voice. "What happened while I was gone?"

Toph breathed unsteadily, crossing her arms against her chest in a vain attempt to feel more grounded. "You just... didn't move," she muttered. "I could feel your heartbeat but it wasn't you. It was... mechanical. You left me, Twinkletoes, without so much as a proper explanation." She exhaled. "So you better start explaining now what's going on. Is Katara all right?"

Aang swallowed. With the visions he had seen... he'd almost forgotten the reason he'd made the leap in the first place, and now an old pain crept up into his chest to share space with the fear that had been with him ever since he'd looked into that pond with Azula by his side for the third time.

"She's fine, I think," he said uncertainly, still trying remember what had happened. "I saw her enter this ice-dome thingy, but I think it was safe."

Toph frowned. "Then why is your heart jumping around like a rabbi-roo's now that you're back?"

_Three old men sitting around a blocky table. One old woman with her hands clawing at the rain. Two young girls dancing through blasts of fire, the first sleek with water and the other sharp as steel... the earth shifting beneath feet to crush someone's bones to powder. The marching of soldiers' feet over soil and rock, inexorable and deadly. The smell of smoke and burning. Fire. Earth. Water. A child screaming. Someone laughing..._

Aang said nothing for a long while, and he could almost feel Toph's impatience as he clambered upwards to gaze across the sea. He didn't know just how long he'd been in the Spirit World... all he knew was that where there had only been vast open ocean, he could now see the thin curve of land at the horizon.

With a quick jerk of his thin shoulders, the Avatar turned back to his friend. Her fingers were beginning to fidget at the sides of her elbows, uncertainty, worry and annoyance all chasing themselves across her open features. For a moment he felt like lying... if the rest of his friends had been there, he probably would have. He wouldn't have wanted to give more reason to Zuko and Sokka's pessimism, or to put a frown of anxiety on Katara's face. But it was just Toph now, and to breach her blunt trust with anything other than honesty would be criminal.

"Because I'm afraid," he said quietly, his voice almost a whisper.

There was a pause, and then "Details," Toph said sharply, where someone else might have hugged him and told him not to fear. And yet it felt right somehow, because he knew that the gentlest of embraces wouldn't take away the horror of what he had seen.

"I saw some pretty bad things while I was there," he shook his head. "Really bad things. Like uprisings and slaughters and... and these people plotting to bring the world back to war again. I'm... I'm afraid that when we get to the Earth Kingdom, it won't be like it was when we left."

_It will be blood, it will be death, it will be despair on the scale that I can't imagine, because I thought that it would all end after the war. And I don't know if I can do it, I don't know if I can do it, I don't know if I'm..._

"Then we'll just make it better again," Toph said brusquely, unfolding her arms to slam a fist into her palm. "You and me, Twinkletoes."

Aang started out of his thoughts, and then for the first time since his visit to the Spirit World, he smiled shakily. "Yeah. Yeah we will."

* * *

_Oh, don't you worry about my strength. _

* * *

"Mom," Katara whispered, and then she was running, and so was her mother, and they leapt into each others' arms with a fervour that stretched past mere blood and bone into heart and soul. Katara wept as she clung to the familiar blue coat tightly, joy and amazement blurring her vision. "Oh Mom, Mom..."

"My baby," Kya clutched her back just as fiercely, her fingers stroking her daughter's head as she squeezed her eyes shut. "Oh my, baby, my beautiful Katara..."

They stayed like that for what could have been second, minutes, or hours... time immaterial as mother and daughter embraced. Katara buried her face in her mother's shoulder, inhaling the sweet, clean smell of ice and fire and home that she had never forgotten. She couldn't believe it. After all this time...

"Mom," she breathed reverently, and pulled back slightly to run gentle fingers over her mother's face. Kya did the same, examining the changes to the girl she'd left behind, the rise in her cheekbones, the increase in her height and the promise of even greater beauty to come in her eyes. "Oh Mom... I found out what you did, I'm so sorry, I ran as fast as I could, but..."

"Shhh, shhhh," Kya held her daughter close again, the tears spilling down her cheeks. "It's not your fault, it's not your fault. I did it for you, baby, and I'd do it again in a heartbeat. Just look at you," she stepped back and smiled, her eyes glimmering with pride. "Look at the strong, beautiful woman you've become. My Katara..."

"Mom," Katara swallowed past the massive lump in her throat, the one still throbbing with shock and joy and tears. "Everything, everything I've done and become... everything is because of you."

"I know, sweetie," Kya stroked her daughter's cheek. "I know, I've been watching. I'm so proud of you, my baby. You and Sokka. You've both done so well..." She pulled Katara back into a hug again, and for a moment she wished she never had to let go. She pressed a kiss to her child's forehead. "And even though it'll be hard," her voice caught, "Even though it'll be hard, I know you'll forge even brighter futures for yourselves."

Katara hugged her mother back fiercely, turning her left side until her chin was tucked just beneath her mother's shoulders, her arms still encircling her tightly. "You know about our futures?"

Kya reached down to grip her daughter's hand. "What do you know?" she asked hesitantly, unsure of how much new information she was bearing.

Katara laughed through newborn tears. "Only that it'll be difficult. Oh! And that a long time ago, a fortuneteller told me that I'd have a great romance and marry a very powerful bender."

Briefly, she thought of Aang's puckered lips and her first kiss, just before he'd leapt off into the sky for the invasion. And she remembered the slight deflation that had followed after the shock. _Wonderful, now I know we're all going to die. _Yes, any great romance that was to be hers was definitely in the future.

Kya laughed warmly, and then sobered. "I'm sure you will, my baby, if that's what you want. But I'm here to tell you that it will be more than just difficult. It'll be dangerous."

Katara stilled, clutching at her mother's sleeve and fingers, and suddenly she was a little girl again as fear swamped through her. "What is it?" she asked, her mouth suddenly dry. "What will happen?"

Kya sighed, wishing that their reunion didn't have to be tainted by this. "You'll need to be strong, baby," she whispered into her daughter's hair. "As strong as you are now, and stronger. And not just your waterbending, either," she interlinked her fingers with her daughter's, and brought both of them up to hover over Katara's chest. "You've always been so full of hope, my baby. And even though what happened on the day of the comet has taken away some of your innocence, in some ways you're still the little girl I left behind."

Katara bit her lip, and pressed her cheek further into the softness of her mother's coat. "Is that a bad thing?" she asked quietly.

Kya paused, shocked into silence for a moment, and then she hastened to explain, letting go of her daughter's fingers to weave them into her loosening hair. "No, Katara, never! Your hope and your pure heart... they are your true strengths, my darling. What I mean is that soon, you'll find them tested. But you mustn't let go of them. It'll take strength, but you mustn't ever let go of who you are."

Kya pulled back once more, her heart breaking as she wished she could say more, yet still hated what she already had to say. "So what I mean is..." she faltered, closed her eyes, and then opened them again with determination. "Now that you know your power, know your choice, know how to use it... are you ready? Are you strong enough to face what will come?"

There was a pause. Even through the thick parka, Katara could feel her mother's steady, thrumming heartbeat, and it counted out the space of time as she gazed into blue, blue eyes, eyes that matched her own and yet were so much greater. These were the eyes which had seen her take her first mewling breaths, eyes which had watched her first faltering steps, eyes which had chased away the nightmares while she slept. They were the eyes which had flowed, overjoyed at her first few feeble waterbending attempts, eyes, eyes which had stared into her own moments before their owner sacrificed everything. For her. Katara swallowed. In the gentle, loving gaze of those eyes, she felt as if she could do anything.

_Are you strong enough to face what will come?_

Katara raised her chin. "Yes," she said stubbornly. "I am, I promise. I won't let you down, Mom. I won't." Never again.

And though the words swirled between them unspoken, Kya smiled, and cupped a wistful hand around Katara's cheek. "You truly are your parents' daughter," she said, her eyes glimmering. "You have both your father's strength and spirit and mine within you. Never forget that. Never forget who you are."

Katara nodded, tears slipping down and wetting her mother's skin. "I won't, Mom. I promise."

"Good," Kya hugged her to her breast once more, fiercely, lovingly, and then let go. "Now go back, Katara. It's time."

Katara's eyes, which had been drooping shut, flew open. "What?! But Mom, we,"

Kya blinked back her own tears, wishing that it didn't have to be like this. And yet the tremulous feel in the air told her that the time had indeed come. "I know, sweetie, I know. I wish we could have more time too. But we will see each other again, Katara. I promise. But for now, you have to go. You're needed."

Katara shook her head, clinging to her mother once again like a newborn child. "But Mom...!"

"Go," it was forceful this time, and Katara felt her spirit obeying even as she reached out, desperate for one last touch. Her fingers reached out to brush her mother's, and Kya smiled, her sapphire eyes glistening with pride.

"Go, Katara," she repeated, her voice soft and loving again. "Remember I love you. I love you all... you, Sokka, and your father," she took an unneeded breath to steady herself. "And please... tell them when you see them. Tell them that I love them, and that... that I think about you every day."

Katara couldn't help it; the words were enough to bring tears to her eyes once more, and despite herself, Katara laughed through her sobs. "We do too, Mom, we do too..."

And then the ice lodge, the furs, and finally her mother's face was covered by mist, and Katara felt herself be carried away.

* * *

_Let's do this._

* * *

The first thing she felt was an odd prickling sensation, and then she was back in her stiff, cooling body. For a moment, it felt as if she were unnaturally constrained, but then her brain remembered how to move and Katara's eyes snapped open. With a gasp, she staggered to her feet and fell, pins and needles scattering their prickling pain across her skin as she hauled herself back upwards again.

Just in time to smell the smoke.

_It'll be dangerous._ Katara stared down the river as her limbs froze, trying to get her mind to work again. The war was over. Villages had fireplaces. Logically, there was nothing wrong. It was just smoke. She was still close to the village, after all, but still...

Her gaze fell onto the purple tunic spread out on the grass, the rope shawl and the hat fluttering next to it. And the smell of smoke came back to her, stronger this time.

_But I believe that Aang can save the world._

Out of nowhere, the thought dropped into her mind like rain onto a lake, and it hung there oddly distilled for a moment before vanishing away into the ether. Katara stared at the clothes, heard the rushing of the waterfalls pass her, and a year of running away from the burn of smoke and fire was enough to get her moving...

This time, to run towards it

* * *

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A/N II: And again, staying up way past my bedtime to write and post. I really have to get more organised. But here it is, and unpolished though it may be (hopefully I have time to go back and make some more changes if they're needed), I hope you still enjoyed it! As always, reviews, comments, and constructive criticisms are really, really welcome. Thanks again! :)


	11. Cast

**Chapter 11: Cast**

Disclaimer: Mike and Bryan, the show's creators, own Avatar: The Last Airbender, completely. I'm only showing my love of their world by playing in it.

A/N I: Whew, new chapter... thanks so much to everybody for their support, and for everyone still with me after ten chapters and a ridiculous number of words. You guys and girls really are the best, so this chapter's for you! :D

* * *

_Cast your hopes to the river,_

_Cast your heart to your kin,_

_Place your trust in the gamble,_

_And pray that you will win._

* * *

She was in motion when her cell door opened, quick steps running lithely across the floor to leap off from the wall. But the instant she heard the hinges creak, she directed her feet towards the pallet that was her bed. And so it was that he found her, eyes downcast in a scowl directed at the nearest corner of her cell, her greasy hair framing her heart-shaped face.

"Lady Mai."

Here in this hellhole, a door opening didn't mean much - it was probably just another guard coming to order her around, to call her _prisoner_ in that sneering voice of theirs. But the title was enough to jerk her head up, and she found herself staring into the smiling eyes of a vaguely familiar face.

_How long has it been? _

He was dressed simply and readily; light armour covered his vitals, almost melding to his body over his deep red tunic. His helmet swung loosely in his hand, freeing his up face to her perusal. Whoever he was, he had the graceful lines of a noble-born, but also the hardness of a soldier. Those two attributes might have been enough to dismiss him in her eyes as nondescript - there were many such people in the Fire Nation. And yet there was something about his half-smile, the inclination of his head that meant more than it should have. Despite the hard reality of his body, the lines on his youthful face carved by duty and responsibility, he looked as though he might soar away at any moment. And locked in a prison of her own making, Mai wanted to reach out and grasp that freedom for herself.

She swallowed hoarsely. "Who are you?"

He pushed the door open fully and rested a foot against it before looking back at her. "Prince Zuko sent me for you and Miss Ty Lee," he replied, the lightness in his voice somehow making him seem more than just the delivery boy. His eyes locked gently into hers. "It's time that you were free."

But the last words were lost to her. "Zuko?" the word stuck in her throat, and she was suddenly on her feet. "Zuko sent you?"

"That's right," he nodded. "Prince Zuko's coronation is at midday, and since we learnt where you were held less than a day ago, he wanted you to attend."

She blinked, disbelieving. He'd found out that she was in prison, and he was freeing her just so she could attend his coronation? She managed to tamp down her bitterness, but not before the last sting of hurt rippled through her. _Why did he take so long? Why didn't he come? _Anger suddenly flared in her chest. "And what if I don't want to?" she lifted her chin up proudly. "What if I decided to tell him where to stick his coronation?"

It was his turn to blink. "Oh! My apologies, Lady Mai. I didn't mean it to come out quite like that. Prince Zuko's first thoughts were to free you, but the timing simply meant that our arrival would coincide neatly with the ceremony," he hesitated, gave her a measured glance, and then continued. "I'm sure it would mean something to him for you to be present."

She gave him her blank, stone-like stare, the one that usually had servants tumbling over her feet. But to her surprise, the formality in him suddenly dropped away and he straightened, a question in his eyes. "And it wouldn't it mean something to you as well?"

The pain was like a thrust in her heart, and it was all the more agonising because it was self-inflicted. "If you're asking whether we're still together, we're not," she turned her gaze away from him, somehow managing to make her tonelessness scathing at the same time. And yet, even as it hurt, the pain seemed to clear away the fog in her mind. _Free. He said that it was time we were free. _The thought was enough to brush away her inner turmoil for later, and she turned back to him like a queen. "Ty Lee?" she demanded.

She expected him to blink, to stumble and to race before he caught up with her. Instead, he glanced at her briefly like he was reading something from her face. "Safe. One of my men is escorting her from her cell at this moment. We shall see her in a few minutes if we leave now."

She watched as his eyes shifted, and he looked around the bare walls of the prison cell - the stone bench and the coarsely padded mattress that had been her constant companion. "Unless, that is, you want anything else from this place?"

The lightly coloured sarcasm in his voice was surprisingly refreshing, and she knew that she would have looked down on him if he'd said it any other way. Nevertheless, Mai was about to snort a rather unladylike reply when she felt the material of her prison uniform rub stickily against her skin. "Actually, yes," she cleared her throat dryly. "I want a shower."

He paused, his hand on the door once again, and she could almost see him thinking against that closed yet open face. "Of course," he replied, and then offered her another half-smile. She decided that she liked that expression on him the best of all, right next to his perplexed one. "I was actually going to take you to the Palace first, but I see the wisdom of your course."

His gaze lingered on her for a moment, thoughtfully, before he turned to hold the door open for her. She tried to ignore him and walk through, but then he spoke again. "Just as well I brought you and Miss Ty Lee suitable raiment."

Mai glanced up at him. "Thank you," she said, startled. And then she realised they were far too close, the narrow confines of the doorway pushing them together, and she stepped through properly and slowly enough to convince herself she wasn't fleeing. There was a pause behind her, and then he released his grip. The sound of the hinges creaking and the door to her cell slamming shut had never sounded so good in her life.

Mai let herself smile, slightly, the cool wind against her cheek giving her a sudden rush of joy. For a moment, she could have laughed at the irony. She'd always worked hard to keep herself a little dead inside, just so she couldn't feel the gnawing hunger of loneliness and disappointment. But prison had changed that. Prison had caged her within herself for so long that the dam had cracked, Zuko and then her own betrayal tossing endless questions and needles of hurt at her that she could not avoid. And it _had_ hurt. Perhaps _you could have at least looked me in the eye when you ripped out my heart _was a tad exaggerated, but the pain had been so _real_ after years of not feeling anything.

Her mouth lifted even more. Yes, that was ironic. Something little to thank Zuko for, she supposed, but then she shoved that thought aside for now, just letting herself enjoy the freedom rushing through her, and marveling at the flipside of allowing herself to feel.

She had forgotten how good joy tasted.

"Lady Mai?"

The strains of freedom rushing through her slowed, but then they collected around her heart and gave her enough energy to jolt her back into moving again. The layers of the prison skimmed away as she walked quickly to the shower block, anticipating the feel of water against her skin. The youth walked steadily to her shoulder, his boots touching lightly against the floor, and Mai suddenly realised that throughout it all, he had never really responded to her first question.

Mai paused, and turned to pin him with her gaze. "Who are you?" she repeated, her eyes narrowing.

His eyes were opaque, barely reflective, and so it was that she couldn't see what he saw. The guard captain watched as underneath the shapeless red shift, her body settled down defensively, her toes angling slightly outward. Even worn down by weeks of prison, she was like a sharply honed blade, glittering, sure and deadly. And to another, perhaps that was all she was. But he saw feeling behind the paleness of her cold beauty, and when he looked into her eyes he found something there, something tangible that mesmerised him with its promise.

"Shen Li," he finally answered. "My name's Shen Li."

* * *

Even in the hard stone confines of the prison, the cascades of water made her feel human again. Still, it was the red and black pile of clothing and the neatly lacquered box on top that made her spirit lift when she got out. Mai stepped into her old clothes again, a genuine smile gracing her face as she felt the familiar silk and cotton against her skin. Her fingers skimmed across the tunic, wondering whether he'd gone to her house or whether Zuko had ordered someone to make up a new set. Not that it mattered. She was out of the shapeless red bag every prisoner at the Boiling Rock wore. That was enough to make everything settle back into place when she looked into the mirror.

Rust-coloured pants against a black, red and white over-tunic with enough spaces and folds to secrete at least twenty daggers. She smiled at herself in the mirror, a smile without warmth or pity.

She was Mai.

Lady Mai.

She was about to turn from the mirror when she saw her eyes. And then she dropped her arms in shock and pressed her nose to the glass. A more unobservant person might have missed it entirely, but now as she looked at herself again, spent longer seconds staring into unfamiliar irises that seemed to carry more weight, a flood of uncertainty prickled her skin. She was Lady Mai, yes. But whatever that title meant now, she wasn't sure. After all, she was no longer the Fire Princess' friend, Azula's puppet or even the Fire Prince's girlfriend. The question gnawed at her for long seconds, until Mai finally turned away from the mirror to face the box she'd left abandoned on the stone seat. Eager to rid herself of the uncomfortable stirring of unsurety, she flipped the casing open without even glancing at the lock. But then when she saw what was inside, laying sharp and sleek against the blood-red cushioning, it felt like time had spun backwards and she was just a child at Flamerule Fest all over again.

"Thank you," she found herself saying again when she was outside.

"You're welcome," he said honestly, no fetters in his gaze. "Are you ready?"

It was funny how such a simple question could let her slip back into the old games again. Mai rolled her eyes. "Of course," she said dryly. "Let's get on with it."

He chuckled, turned, and then they were off to the gondolas. And Mai was glad all over again for her foresight when Ty Lee came running, once again dressed in her irrepressible pink outfit and with her ecstatic smile shining through the grime. Not that that stopped Mai from hugging her back, or from sitting as close as she possibly could to her childhood friend on the way back. Shen Li had brought a small fleet of three air balloons, and yet even they were cramped with the other prisoners he'd been requested to bring back. Mai turned away from the glares of a Water tribe woman in the corner and spent most of the time listening to Ty Lee (_it'll be all better now! Even though I don't really know where to go yet, at least we're free!_) and quizzing the intriguing guard captain on the events they'd missed in the past few weeks. The hours ticked past surprisingly quickly with those two pastimes, and so it was that the rush of apprehension caught her by surprise when the helmsman announced they were landing.

Mai got to her feet warily, hanging back as the other guards escorted the Earth and Water prisoners to the courtyard. But then she felt Ty Lee snatch her hand, and she was dragged off the air balloon and onto the soil of the Fire Nation capitol before she could blink. And she was free, she was truly free of the stupid prison with its stupid chains...

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Shen Li speaking to one of his guards, and then Ty Lee gave her another hard hug that almost cracked her ribs and bounced off to have her own shower. That left Mai with the guard captain, and he shaded his eyes as he tracked the sun against the sky. The golden globe was close to its zenith, and he judged that they had about twenty-five minutes to go before Prince Zuko stepped out into the courtyard.

The girl next to him shifted, and he turned to see caution suddenly veiling her eyes. "Now what?" she asked dryly. "I suppose we go off to watch Zuko's coronation?"

Shen Li caught the inflection in her voice, and shook his head inwardly. Even if she was denying it, he could tell that there was still something between her and the Fire Prince, something that they would both need to sort out. He remembered the look in Zuko's face when he'd mentioned her name, and he glanced at the sun one last time before turning back to her. "Actually, I believe Prince Zuko will have finished with most of his preparations. We have enough time to see him briefly now... if you'd like."

For a moment her eyes widened, and they opened his gaze long enough to see that he was right. But as quickly as the window had come, they closed again, and she scowled, her shield of boredom falling across her face once more.

"Fine," she muttered. "Let's get this over with."

She swept away before he could answer, as imperiously as any princess.And Shen Li let a corner of his mouth lift before he followed . _As you wish. _

The remainder of their walk up to the palace was silent. Mai was lost in her thoughts, the turmoil she'd pushed away coming back with a vengeance, and Shen Li was content to let stillness lie where he found it. She didn't complain; it gave her time to think. Despite what she'd said, she wasn't sure if she wanted to face Zuko again. The last time she'd seen him had been painful enough, when she'd turned long enough during her betrayal to glance over her shoulder and see him gazing back at her. Their eyes had locked with such finality it had hurt, the silent pain and promise she'd tossed over their connection met only by the blank hopelessness of a useless apology. Mai's jaw tightened. Even though it had been weeks, weeks locked away with only the shadows of her own company, she wasn't sure if she was ready for a repeat.

"Lady Mai?"

She started. They were in an arching golden corridor, soft red carpet at their feet, and she stared at the flame-stitched curtain in front of them for a moment before remembering. "He's here?"

"He's here," Shen Li nodded in confirmation. "Not only that, there's only a few minutes left until he's due to go out, so he should be alone." He gestured at the hanging with his hand and stepped back. "Here, I'll stay outside. You'll have some privacy."

Mai looked at him askance. "We've never had privacy."

He looked surprised. "Really?"

She was about to retort when the memory hit her. The first night after Azula's conquering of Ba Sing Se. She remembered ignoring Azula's snidely encouraging laugh as she traversed the corridors, her feet unerringly pointed towards his room in the maze of green. _And she hated green. _And when she'd found him...

They'd been alone that night. That night when it all began...

Mai snarled inwardly at herself and then faced the curtain head-on. _How fitting it should end as it began, _she thought. And then she soundlessly stepped through.

The first thing she saw was a tall figure silhouetted against the far left window. He looked so different for a moment that she didn't recognise him. His hands were clasped loosely at his front, draping the royal ceremonial robes sharply around his shoulders, and he looked so much like a Lord that her eyes moved to the other figure in the room second, expecting to see Zuko's scarred face staring back at her.

But she didn't.

It took Mai a second to process what she was seeing. Directly ahead of her was the fire-insignia curtain leading out to the courtyard where the people were waiting. To her left, Zuko stood facing the window to the ocean, his back to her. And then to her right, a man crouched in the shadows, holding something sharp and glinting...

"Zuko!" she shouted, and he whipped around, his scarred eye widening in what seemed like slow motion. But then after that, it was over frighteningly quickly. Mai hurled her newly regained senbon with a speed and an accuracy born of pure instinct and desperation, and the man was pinned to the wall before he could shout. But the blade had already left his fingers. Her eyes tracked it as it sped towards its target, and she saw Zuko's pale face even as she knew she couldn't stop it...

From somewhere deep inside her, a volcanic eruption of flame enveloped her core. A distant, silent cry ripped from her heart, and then Mai felt the wild rush of vengeance seize her limbs. It moved her across ten meters of floor in a breath, and she fell on the assassin like a deadly puma-leopard, spearing his throat with her hands and sharply cracking her elbow against his face. There was a dull _snap! _as his head jerked back against the wall, and then he crumpled. She kicked a last dart into his unconscious body viciously, pinning his clothing irrevocably to the wall.And then she turned, readying herself to see Zuko on the floor, to see blood...

Instead, she saw wires.

Shen Li crouched low on the floor, his two hands extended and his fingers plucking the air. The assassin's blade hung frozen in space, centimeters from Zuko's heart, before clattering to the ground. The guard captain wound his wires back, and the weapon skittered across the floor back to him, leaving an oily trail of poison in his wake. He bent to pick it up, an unreadable expression crossing his face. And when he looked up, he was instantly caught; trapped in the cross-gazes of the Prince and his former lady as they stared at each other, at him, and then at the unconscious assassin hanging from the wall.

It was as if time had separated from its dimension and frozen them all in their place. In the background, the crash of the gong sounded to signal the Fire Prince. But none of them moved. Mai felt the currents of an ocean shift inside her, and then the words came rushing out from old memories like a newborn spring, clearing away the shadows in her mind. "You," Mai whispered, lowering her knives as she locked gazes with the boy in front of her. "You were the boy with the wires."

Shen Li didn't move, his amber eyes drawn hopelessly back into hers. "I..."

Zuko turned to glance at both of them, sharply. "You two know each other? How?"

The words seemed to start the guard captain back to his senses. "I... We don't have time, Zuko. The gong's already sounded. You should be out there."

Mai swallowed, shaken, and that in itself was shocking. "That man was trying to kill you," she said numbly, and the nightmarish images leapt into her mind yet again. Pictures of Zuko collapsed on the floor, a marionette with its strings cut. And red, so much red... "What if there's someone else?" she demanded abruptly. "They sent one assassin, there could be another one out in the crowd."

Shen Li didn't hesitate before he shook his head. "Chances are that there aren't," he responded crisply, looping his wires into his hands and then tucking them back into his sleeves. "Whoever planned this didn't expect us to interrupt. But even if there is, I think I've enough time to get to the audience if I need to. I'll stay in the shadows..."

"Not alone," she felt her breath slowly creep back to her, her control reasserting itself again as she overrode him. "I'll come with you. That way there'll be two pairs of eyes and we'll be more likely to get to any would-be traitor in time..."

Shen Li tightened his jaw. _There are thousands of people out there who hate him. Two still won't be enough._ "Fine. We'll have to be fast, though, and..."

"Hey!" Zuko interjected, eyes flashing. "I'm still in the room you know. You don't have to go anywhere, I'll be fine."

"But Prince Zuko..."

He clenched his fists underneath his sleeves, ignoring his security guard to focus on her. "We need to talk," he said desperately. "Mai, I'm so sorry, I..."

She glared at him, and the ferocity of it pinned him to the floor. "Are you insane?" she rasped. "Shen Li's right. You need to be out there. Now."

The gong sounded again, a little desperately, and Zuko wished he could scream. "Fine," he said in a hard voice. "But we're talking later. We're not finished here."

His gaze were as rough as his voice, but they were somehow pleading as well, and Mai said nothing as she tilted her head and studied him, studied the length of his pale neck and the dreams and determination in his eyes that she had always dismissed until now. "No," she agreed calmly. "But we will be."

_How the blazes could he answer that? _Zuko clenched his fists, ready to fight her, ready to fight for her like he should have, but then the unending reverberations of the gong shook him to his senses and he dropped his arms to his sides like hot coals. A sudden emptiness opened up in his stomach, a bottomless pit that he couldn't control. What was he thinking? He wasn't just the Fire Prince any more. He was about to become Fire Lord, and he saw that knowledge already settled in the eyes of his guard captain and his former girlfriend.

_So act like it, _they seemed to say, and Zuko set his shoulders in response.

"Follow me," he asked suddenly, curtly. It hung in the air, not so much an order as it was a question, and yet neither of them hesitated.

"Always," they replied in unison, surprise colouring their features as they glanced each at each other a moment later. Mai was the first to look away, her hand moving up to touch the raspy hint of tears in her throat.But then Zuko spoke, and she had to look back into his shining eyes, full of regrets and acknowledgment.

"Thank you," he said, honestly, and then he turned swiftly away to stride out to the waiting masses. And Shen Li and Mai didn't pause as they gathered themselves to do as they promised.

Follow him.

* * *

The first thing that struck him was just how many people there were. Zuko was glad suddenly for the heavy, draping robes - they hid his tremors as he walked, made him graceful as he passed the Fire Sages and their narrowed eyes and strode into the burn of the sun. In front of him, the great cascade of stairs tumbled down into the great courtyard filled with what looked to be thousands of people. For a moment, he was overwhelmed by the sea of crimsons, golds and blacks, but then as he focused her saw the small circle of greens and blues to his left, looking weak and yet inconceivably strong in their loneliness. And he swallowed at their faces, which blurred into the features of so many others staring at him with hate, with fear and distrust.

_Agni help me. _

Zuko had never imagined that his coronation would be like this. When he was younger, he'd just pictured hordes of his people cheering in the streets as the crown was placed on top of his head. And then as he'd gotten older, he'd envisaged more - the Fire sages proclaiming him as Ozai's beloved son before they crowned him. Zuko squeezed his eyes shut briefly for a moment. There had also been a time, that black, dark time when he'd almost given up entirely...

But that certainly wasn't the case now. The crown was his for the taking - he could see it glittering in the hands of a Fire Sage just to his right. But the people spread out in front of him were not cheering. They had become silent at his entrance, and somehow that was more foreboding than anything else could have been. He'd never thought he would take the throne with his people hating him _even when I did it all for them, it was always for them, can't they see that? _And he remembered with a start one of the oldest history lessons he'd taken as a child. The ones about failed Fire Lords, about riots in the street and the collective power of the people's hatred.

Zuko swallowed again. The evidence was spread out before him, in mutinous, shadowed faces and distrusting eyes. He was the traitor prince, and someone had just tried to kill him. His blood went cold under the burning of the sun, and Zuko suddenly wanted to turn tail and flee back into the golden cage of the palace. He couldn't do it. He couldn't. He could fight against Azula, he could fight against himself, but he couldn't fight against ten thousand people who hated him, not when he loved them, when he loved his country. And he couldn't see any other way to combat it. Public opinion was stubborn, he _knew_ that. Blue eyes suddenly flashed in his memory, and he remembered how hard that had been, the weeks of living with the snide remarks and the hateful glances, even when he'd deserved every one of them.

Zuko looked at his people, and inwardly he quailed. He wasn't sure he could do that for the rest of his life, however long it would be. Especially not when this time, he'd done it for them. He'd always done it for them. Yet the hatred and ignorance shining back at him gave him a glimpse of his future, and Zuko was suddenly sure he couldn't do it.

_Oh Uncle, I'm sorry, I can't. I don't have what it takes, I don't. I'm just Zuko, I'm just the traitor, banished, exiled prince, and I..._

_I never give up without a fight. _

He could have laughed or sobbed as the thought rose up in his mind. No, he never gave up without a fight, but this was one that he'd never dreamt of, an uphill battle without an end in sight against his own people. And even if by some miracle he won that, what then? The group of blues and greens stared back at him accusingly as the question flitted across his face. The whole world hated the Fire Nation now, he'd seen evidence of that with his own eyes. His gaze drew itself to the sea he'd been staring at to calm himself. Somewhere across its waters, Aang was either battling or about to battle the Earth Kingdom men intent on slaughtering his soldiers.

He wasn't sure he could blame them.

Zuko looked at the sea, looked at his people, looked at the foreign prisoners, and then looked at his hands. And then he cleared his throat, and the crowd, which had already fallen silent, quieted further. In the stillness, he heard two pairs of footsteps come to a halt behind him,_ wow, did everything really just occur to me in only a few seconds?_ and the sound of them gave him an absurd sense of courage. Everything was in place now, ready for him even if he wasn't sure if he was ready for it, and so he took a moment to focus again on the pocket of blues and greens. They stood so solidly against the crowd of Fire Nation people, and he smiled at their strength. Three years ago, he had ventured out thinking that the Fire Nation deserved to rule the world. Now, he only hoped that he would live to see equal, balanced lines of the four elements one day, perhaps even in this very courtyard. And as if to remind him of the possibilities, he suddenly saw Azula's bier out of the corner of his eye, shining unbearably, simply, and beautifully in the light of the sun.

Zuko set his shoulders again. He could not fail.

He turned to his people first, spreading out his arms in an opening gesture, "People of the Fire Nation," he called, and his voice rolled over the massive sea of crimson and touched the tiny group of greens and blues. "People of the World."

There was a restless murmur, but he did not wait for it to quiet. "We stand before each other today at the brink of a new era. For almost a century, we have been turned against each other by men seeking what they shouldn't. We have been taught hatred, fed lies, and instructed to fear."

His gaze swept down to the people of the Earth Kingdom and the Water Tribes. "The war has taken us away from our families. The war has taken families away from us. The war has stolen us, beaten us, and imprisoned us. And although it is over, the hatred and fear it bred is not. They live within us, and if we let them, they will continue to destroy us."

_It was a contingent. That was the first thing Katara saw as she crested the bend in the river. A contingent of fully armoured, trained Fire Nation soldiers systematically tearing the small village down even as their leader stood tall on a pile of broken things and spat out words of hate and fury. And yet their numbers didn't even make her pause. She felt strong in purple cloth and gauze, absurdly powerful in her element. She rushed down the river almost silently, any noise of her passage cloaked by the rushing of the river, and so it was that the villagers saw her, but the leader of the insurgents didn't. She caught his last few words just before she rained down water on the burning houses and drenched everyone in sight..._

_... "We will not back down for the Avatar's lackey! We will never bow to the traitor Prince!"_

_And the bile sliced through the air, rammed down her throat, and Katara smirked painfully just before she slammed her next wave into his back._

He had never thought of himself as a great speaker. _Hi, Zuko here. _And yet, he could see the effect of his words now, rolling across the crowd with a dreadful simplicity, and they gave him the courage to steel himself for the next leap, the plunge that would seal his fate whichever way his people turned. For a moment, he didn't think he could do it. He had always pushed it away from him, hidden the hurt under layers of anger and misdirected hatred. But then his mind leapt back to a night three days ago, when he'd met with a young waterbender who'd once been his enemy, and she'd looked up into his eyes.

_You'll make a good Fire Lord. I believe in you. _

Zuko breathed, in, and out. And then the words came like lava, hot and blackened against his tongue. "Four years ago, I was burned in this courtyard for daring to speak out against the needless sacrifice of our soldiers."

He didn't need to have ears to hear the gasp. Stories has abounded of just what had caused the Fire Prince's banishment. When Zuko had returned, the old official statements of 'a training accident' had circulated, but even by then not many people had believed it. No training accident could be that controlled, that precise, and leave the eye intact. Not when it was the Fire Prince.

"And then, when I was banished and dishonoured, I was sent to find the Avatar. The last perceived threat to the Fire Nation."

There was almost a collective sigh, a hissing between the teeth of the blood-coloured crowd. Yes, the Avatar. For a moment, Zuko idly wondered how many of them had seen the horror of the Ember Island Players, but then he dismissed it. There was enough other propaganda swirling around the Fire Nation to choke a herd of ostrich-horses. "Yes, the Avatar. The last perceived threat to the Fire Nation, but as I learnt, the last hope to the world."

_Aang had known it would be bad. But he hadn't thought it would be like this. The Earth Kingdom smoked and crumbled beneath them as Appa sank lower, and the Avatar looked at the ruins before him, saw where the Fire Nation soldiers had barricaded themselves behind fallen wood. He heard the shrilling cries of the desperate, the dying, and the chilling silence of the dead as civilians and soldiers alike, armed with whatever they could find, laid into red-coloured armour and flesh. He saw where the ground was darker, realised with horror that it was the stain of blood..._

_Toph swallowed beside him, her little hands clutching the side of Appa's saddle. He looked at them, briefly. The fingers were stubborn and hard, the fingernails cracked and dirty as they tightened. "It's bad, isn't it?"_

_Aang did not answer. But a terrible cry sounded in his throat as he leapt off Appa's back into the fray._

"The Avatar brings balance. He _is_ balance. Balance between the four nations, the way things were meant to be," he shook his head hopelessly. "The Fire Nation was never meant to take over the world. We were lied to," his voice shook. "We were taught, we, the loyal sons and daughters of the Fire Nation were taught that we were bringing the greatness of the Fire Nation to the world. But we weren't. We were bringing death and despair, and back home, death and despair were sowed when good Fire Nation soldiers died for the greed and power-hunger of others."

Zuko smiled grimly. "Four years ago, I was burned for valuing lives over misguided victory, valuing my people, the Fire Nation's honour over its war. Three days ago, I watched my sister descend into madness because of that same mentality," he paused and spread his arms out, each second trembling past in the wind. "This war has scarred both the Fire Nation and the world. All of us have lost loved ones - daughters, sons, some soldiers, some innocents," his breath hitched a little and he went on. "We have lost mothers and fathers, grandparents, brothers and sisters. And in their place, the war has made us gain hatred and loathing, fear and disdain."

_There were many of them, and that was her downfall. Katara had barely enough time to recapture her water when the fireballs streaked at her, screaming against the wind. She dodged them, threw up waves to catch them, but there were so many of them that it was just within her to keep out of their way. But then there was a cry, and her eyes strayed automatically to one of the villagers and she recognised his beaten face, _Lee! _And the distraction was enough to make her pause, make the Painted Lady hover still in the air and then fly backwards with a cry when the force of a narrowly deflected flame strike toppled her backwards against unyielding stone. Through a daze, she heard the leader walk to the edge of the pier and felt him stare downwards, trying to see past the woven straw and the gauze. His voice was mocking and cruel as his gaze swept over the rest of her. "And who are you, little girl?"_

"The war may be over, but the hatred and fear continues. People have suffered, suffered terribly, and the easiest path for suffering is to hate. And yet we cannot let this happen."

Zuko sucked in a breath, a little unsteadily, and then plunged ahead. "And that is why we are all gathered here today. Fire, Water, Earth." The last one hung in the air unspoken, and he bared his face proudly to the sky even as he felt his heart crack a little inside. "All of us have been scarred by the war, and so all of us must now work together to heal. Peace can come, if we fight for it together. Because although the Air Nomads and their wisdom is gone, the last Airbender is still with us, and we can learn compassion and forgiveness from him. Because the Avatar is in the Earth Kingdom right now, protecting our soldiers and our people from hate."

_Toph had fought at Earth Rumbles. Toph had fought the Dai Li. But these were civilians, crazed by hatred and grief, and so she blocked off blows and trapped limbs in stone. But they just kept coming. _

_Most of the soldiers, bound by their orders, did not fire back. With their superior battle skill, they ran, they evaded, they blocked. And when they were overrun, they died. But some struck back, fear overcoming discipline and honour. And Toph felt the blood of both sides spill into the earth, felt a hundred hammering heartbeats of hatred, and wanted to cry._

_But she didn't. She firmed her little feet and she sunk low in her stance, just like she'd taught herself and taught him, and she somehow felt his heartbeat through it all. That little, unique fluttering that called to her as she smashed rocks and heaved earth. She felt Aang stand tall, powerful sweeps of air driving the combatants apart. And although she couldn't see it, she knew that he wasn't going to back down either._

The ripples spread like water across the crowd, too quick to see with the naked eye. _The Avatar? The Avatar is fighting for us? _And a pained smile crossed Zuko's face as he nodded.

"With the help of all four nations, the Avatar has brought the war to an end. And now, with the Avatar's help, we can set our world back on the right path."

The promise hung in the air, and the crowd did not stir, frozen in expectation as if a spell had been cast over them. Zuko felt the burn of thousands of eyes on his skin, and he set his shoulders. It was time.

The Fire Prince gave a short, sharp nod, and then to his right the Fire Sages ignited Azula's bier. The fire instantly caught, drawn to the girl as deadly and beautiful as the flames she'd controlled. There was a sudden, collective intake of breath, and then the crowd bowed their heads as one, and Zuko lowered his too. But his somewhat elevated position still allowed him to see the flames, and Zuko watched transfixed as they danced higher and higher into the air, the beautifully lacquered wood of her coffin falling away under its touch. And as his eyes were drawn into the intense pulse of the fire, he thought he saw the shadows of two small children, playing on the beach.

_She was your sister, _Katara had said, and all of a sudden the reality came crashing down on him again, crushing his heart and stealing his breath. Azula. Azula, Azula. Azula the prodigy. Azula his nemesis. Azula his _sister_.

_Oh Agni. _And the tears burned at the very back of his eyes, ready to fall when he let them later. Because in the end, he'd known that she'd been as much a victim of the war and their father as anyone else. And with that memory something else stirred in the back of his mind, and he gazed at the bier as if gazing into the past.

_Once, long ago, I knelt here as someone burned, _he remembered distantly, and then his jaw tightened as he remembered the years that had followed.

_This time, it will be different. _

The roar of the flames filled the air, smoke carrying on the wind and sending fine ash soaring freely into the sky. _Swift journey, Azula. May the Spirit World be kinder to you than ours. _And Zuko stood up abruptly, centering all attention back to him as he spoke once more.

"Three days ago, I promised my uncle that I would restore the honour of the Fire Nation. And in front of you now, I promise you that I will fight and struggle until the last drop of my blood."

_Because Zuko never gives up. Not without a fight. And now, I don't need to always remember who I am. I know._

"But I will need your help," the words rung out clear and commanding, strong even as he bared his weakness in front of him. "It will take all of us to make the world whole. Not just the Fire Nation, not just the Earth Kingdom or the Water Tribes, but all of us. The war has divided us into nations, but the scars it has inflicted has also brought us together as people. People who have known suffering. But with the return of Aang, the Last Airbender, we have hope."

He had them now. It was impossible, but there was no other way to describe the rapt attention, the shift in the air. For a moment, Zuko was struck with the irrepressible urge to lick his finger and turn it to the wind, just to feel it changing. But he instead swallowed down the tickle in his throat, the hoarseness that was beginning to develop.

_I won't let you down,_

"The road ahead of us is challenging. A hundred years of fighting has left the world scarred and divided. But with the Avatar's help, we can set it back on the right path."

His voice roughened in his throat. "I won't lie. It will be hard, Some might even think it impossible." _He thought of flashing, steel-blue eyes, and then the sudden swiftness of the hug, the sudden warmth of two hearts beating._ He curled his fingers into a desperate fist, a prayer. "But we owe it to ourselves, and to the world, to _**try**_."

There was a stunned, heady silence. In it, Zuko turned and walked like a statue, knelt before his captive audience and felt the footsteps of the Fire Sage behind him through his fingers on the carpet. The moment seemed to stretch out forever, and then the crown settled onto his head and with its weight came the crushing mantle of responsibility on his shoulders. Zuko almost fell as he rose slowly, his heart leaden in his chest and pumping out doubt around his bloodstream. _I promised them honour. Me the banished, traitor prince. The exile. The one lucky to be born... _

The enormity of all, the lives and the consequences now hanging around his neck like a millstone almost pulled him down to his knees again. But he struggled back to the stage front, each step an internal battle against doubt, fear, and despair _because Zuko never gives up without a fight. _And as he stared at the crowd, at his people, wondering what words of hatred were hidden in that silence, the burden finally bowed his head. Slowly, falteringly, slightly, Zuko lowered his neck down so little that one might have called it a mere inclination if they were ignorant of Fire Nation traditions. But the crowd saw it, his people saw it, and all of a sudden the words he had spoken coalesced from mere sentences into a tangible thing, a living dream that was as impossible as the fact that their Fire Lord was bowing to them and thus binding himself to them in service.

And so it was that as the red carpet at his feet blurred with tiredness and despair, Zuko heard someone cry out. And he jerked upwards in surprise, just in time to see the ocean of people and colours in front of him open their mouths and the tension that had bound them all suddenly erupt.

"FIRE LORD ZUKO! FIRE LORD ZUKO! HAIL! _HAIL_! FIRE LORD ZUKO!"

_And far away Katara smiled and lifted her head, sipping a little on her own blood as she replied. "I am Katara of the Southern Water Tribes, daughter of Chief Hakoda and Kya!" and lifted her arms and brought them crashing down in time to the blood in his veins. And when he stumbled off the heap of broken things, his limbs nerveless under her grasp, she released him and pulled the water up around her. It danced to her song as she twisted her stance, the rope shawl fluttering against her shoulders, and then it arced out like tentacles, snatching Fire Nation insurgents into the air and tossing them into the river..._

_And even further away, Aang's eyes glowed and Toph stepped back without seeing, without needing to know that his shouted "ENOUGH!" had brought everyone to a halt... _

And the weight which had been crushing his soul suddenly lifted with the wave of awe and realisation, _Agni, it'd worked. It'd __**worked**__!_ crescendoing in time with the crowd as they stamped their feet and roared their support to the sky. "FIRE LORD ZUKO! FIRE LORD ZUKO! HAIL! _HAIL_! FIRE LORD ZUKO!"

The chant reverberated in his ears and his body, working their way into the stone at his feet and the wind at his back. In response, Zuko stood fully, pulling himself up straight and setting his shoulders in a silent promise. _I won't let you down._ And the people kept roaring, united briefly by the hope of something greater, something more whole than the hate they had glutted themselves on for so long, until the rivers winding through the Fire Nation themselves coursed to the thrum, the beat, the rhythm of the voices... even as further upstream Katara swept away the last insurgent and doused the flames of the village, and across the ocean Earth and Fire alike stilled to listen to the Avatar's peace.

"FIRE LORD ZUKO! FIRE LORD ZUKO! HAIL! _HAIL_! FIRE LORD ZUKO!"

And although there was no way Zuko could possibly know either, and although there were surely still curses and screams of hatred mixed up in the overwhelming cry of the crowd, his sudden elation opened the floodgates and sent the song of his people rushing through his body in a giddy whirl of awe. And he could have laughed, he could have cried, but instead he stepped forwards, and then again and again as he walked from the shadow of overhanging palace roof into the light of Agni and his people, smiling like an idiot as hope burned into his heart.

And miles away in the heart of the Fire Nation, the rocky ground beneath the team of scouts sent to find a secret army suddenly reared up and swallowed them whole.

* * *

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A/N II: Hope it wasn't too sentimental or overdone... I'm never quite sure if I've struck the right balance. But yes, comments, reviews, and constructive criticisms are very, very welcome! Seriously, they keep me going through the hard times, so thanks to everyone who regularly gives me feedback, as well as everyone still reading. I can't say how honoured I am to be sharing the ride with you. So let me know that you're here with me too! :)


	12. Uphill

**Chapter 12: Uphill**

Disclaimer: Mike and Bryan, the show's creators, own Avatar: The Last Airbender, completely. I'm only showing my love of their world by playing in it.

A/N I have to admit, I had some trouble with this one just because I didn't know how to continue after the end of the last chapter. But hey, even though it's late, it's up and it's here, so I hope you enjoy!

* * *

_Your compass lies in broken glass,_

_Your miracles have come to pass,_

_Now steel yourself, for nothing's clear,_

_Except that it's uphill from here._

* * *

Two hours later, Zuko still hadn't come down from the sheer _high_ of it all. Then again, it probably wouldn't have mattered if it had been two years. The sound of his people chanting his name, the hot taste of the midday sun flooding his mouth… they'd all combined into a giddy elixir that had him wanting to leap in the air and laugh like a child even as he stood and smiled and waved to his subjects. The elation hadn't even budged when Sokka and Suki had come with downturned mouths and news of the prisoners' hatred. Somehow, the news of yet more people who wanted him dead didn't seem to matter so much when he knew that _his_ people had given him a second chance. A second chance to recast himself as the Fire Lord. A second chance to serve them as their true leader and not their prince, not the banished, exiled traitor prince they knew him as.

And so even as Zuko spoke with the former prisoners and led the political waltz around his two-faced nobles and advisors, he smiled to himself. And it was a smile of such hope and wonder, he couldn't believe it was even on his face. _I won't let you down._

But of course, all good things had to end. Not that the feeling of awe had ended, per se. No, Zuko knew that he would always carry that miracle somewhere in his heart, somewhere under the scar that Azula had left and the unseen ones that everyone else had. No, the sheer exhilaration hadn't ended, it was just tempered now by a new feeling. Zuko couldn't spend forever swimming through the hordes of his subjects, his heart and soul dancing unseen on the clouds above him even as he shook hands and organised new events and checked the news of messengers and acted like a Fire Lord. He didn't even have the rest of the day - reality had set its hidden timer on him, and he'd had to obey. Because even the wary acceptance of most of his people couldn't erase the fact that less than five minutes before he'd stepped out to meet his destiny, someone had tried to kill him.

And so now he was here, the stifling expanse of the throne room… _his_ throne room… holding him in its embrace. And he was quickly losing his patience.

Fire, Zuko thought reflectively, could do so many wonderful things. It could dry out your clothes in the rain, heat the bathwater to just the right temperature, and even ensure that one's tea never got cold.

It was also very good for burning somebody's throat from the inside out.

"You're not answering my question, General Sheng," he said as politely as he could while the rational, newly-minted Fire Lord side of him was patiently smothering the other, more openly homicidal side. "I understand perfectly that the crowd was too large for one hundred percent security in the courtyard. I'm asking you how in Agni's name a would-be assassin got into the palace and into the same room with me without one of your men noticing."

Shen Li's father was an imposing man, but Zuko was beyond imposed at the moment. Someone had tried to kill him. Again. And they would very likely have succeeded if it hadn't been for Mai and Shen Li.

Internally, Zuko pulled a face. It didn't help that he didn't particularly want to think about them right now. He didn't want to think about the command that had burst forth from his lips, nor the ramifications of their unified answer. And even aside from that, and aside from the sheer shock of having them interrupt the minutes he'd spent drowning in fear and doubt, the strange, unexplainable moment of connection between them had unsettled him. He didn't know how to describe it, or even why, but the harsh crackle of electricity that had leapt in the air had left a bitter taste in his mouth. Whatever had happened, whatever was happening, things were changing. And there was nothing he could do about it.

If he'd been alone, he would have bit off a laugh. _Like that's something new. _But of course, he wasn't alone, and so he just sat and tried to look calm while the fire inside him threatened to escalate.

_Breathe. In, out. Just like Uncle taught me. Just like..._

General Sheng pulled himself up, a perfect picture of Fire Nation arrogance that would have been laughably pompous if it hadn't been for the deadly steel in his eyes. _Breathe. _"With all due respect, Fire Lord Zuko," he said stiffly. "One of my men did notice. I do believe that my son was the one who apprehended the assassin."

_In, out. _Zuko's voice grew chilly to match the impertinence. "Firstly, it was Lady Mai who dealt with the _would_-be assassin. Secondly, I was not aware that your son served as part of your security forces." The Fire Lord smiled darkly. "He's more talented than I give him credit for if he can juggle two such highly demanding jobs at the same time."

There was a pause, and then the crackle of tension between them leapt into the air. A fifty year old general and a seventeen year old Fire Lord... and it was the former having to answer to the latter. Zuko could almost hear his Minister for Security grinding his teeth, but then the unthinkable happened.

"I..." General Sheng exhaled through his nose and then dropped his shoulders. As tense as he was, Zuko watched impassively as the shadows across the other man's face suddenly deepened, accentuating the weary lines etched into his skin while his entire demeanour seemed to sink to the bottom of the ocean. Internally, Zuko had to suppress a shred of admiration for the acting. And then the General slowly crashed to his knees, and the cynical appreciation turned into genuine surprise.

"I am sorry, my Lord," General Sheng said hoarsely. "I failed in my most important task; to keep your person safe." As he talked, his left hand moved to his scabbard, and though Zuko tensed, the man didn't look up as he raised the blade above his head, its surface balancing across his two palms like an offering. "If you will have me forfeit my life, then I..."

Zuko's eyes widened fractionally, and then he laid a hand on the flat of the sword. "There will be no forfeiting of lives," he said sternly, and then hesitated slightly before continuing. "I summoned you here to make sure that such a thing never happened again. From now on, everything has to be airtight. No more assassins bypassing what should be the best force in the Fire Nation. No more uprisings without at least some warning of trouble." A sudden thought struck him, and he shook his head. "Have you even begun questioning the prisoners responsible for the disturbance in the Eastern square?"

The other stayed low and stiff. "My men have not found out anything of use as of yet, my Lord." He paused. "We are hoping, however, that one of them will crack soon."

Zuko's lips tightened. "I shall visit the Tower tomorrow," he decided, and then looked down at the man at his feet. A sudden wave of distaste rushed over him, and some of it found its way into his voice. "Are there any other failures I should know about?"

He regretted the words as soon as they left his lips, and yet inside the royal side of him sat up proudly. Whatever Zuko's natural inclinations towards forgiveness for what _appeared_ to be only carelessness, and he was having rather suspicious thoughts about that, nothing could erase the fact that a man had almost managed to kill him two hours ago. Perhaps the success and arrogance brought by the war had made palace security slack... but then again, that was no excuse whatsoever.

General Sheng did not move. Zuko counted the heartbeats, the breaths, until finally the other man spoke. "Do you have any personal thoughts on how the system could be improved, my Lord?"

Everything unspoken said it all. "I want you to check the origins of the poison they used today and the poison they used in the uprising. Then I want your forces to check the origins of our prisoners. Their families, where they live. Then I want someone to dig up the old codes and rules of conduct for our security officers and have everyone learn them again." A sharp, sarcastic smirk twisted his lips. "If you run out of ideas, perhaps you could engage Lady Mai."

General Sheng rose, and then dipped again in a bow. "Thank you, my Lord," he said neutrally. Zuko nodded once, and then watched the man turn and stride stiffly down the length of the throne room,

When the door had closed, Zuko sat still for a while, the only companion beside him the crackle of his waves. Finally, he stood and dismissed them with a wave of his hand, and watched thoughtfully as they sank back down to the ground and vanished.

"Well, Chief Advisor Hui?" he asked to the air. "What do you think?"

From the far corner of the room, the old advisor melted out from behind the flame embroidered hangings, his step as quiet as ever.

"You are a forgiving man," he commented neutrally. "If your father was still Fire Lord, General Sheng would have been lucky to escape with his health, let alone his position."

The smirk dropped off Zuko's face. "I know," he said crisply, stepping down from the throne and following the route his Minister for Security had trodden not five minutes ago. "That's why he's a very lucky man."

_Or maybe I'm just a very stupid person. _

The thought made him frown. Had his time with the Avatar and his friends made him soft? He hardened his stomach. He couldn't afford to be soft.

And yet... he couldn't afford to not be himself either. He had seen where that path took him, and he had no desire to go down it again. Zuko sighed, and felt his internal flame rise up and down in his chest. Balance. He'd just have to keep his balance.

_But how?_

The thought stopped him in his tracks, left the new Fire Lord cold and nerveless as he leaned against the door. And outside in the corridor, General Sheng's eyes narrowed, unable to stop the words from echoing in his head.

_... perhaps you could engage Lady Mai._

Lady Mai. He remembered a tall, slender, weapon of a girl, whose shiny black locks framed a heart-shaped face which still somehow managed to be as sharp as the knives she wielded. He remembered her standing with his son behind his new leader, both tall and proud and breaking tradition as if they were meant to. And he remembered the prickle that had crept across his skin at the sight. There had been something in the way she'd walked like a predator, something in the way they'd moved together...

With an abrupt twist, General Sheng began striding down the corridor, his blood-red cloak flowing behind him and his mind lost in thought. Yes... the Governor of Omashu's daughter. Who'd betrayed Azula, yes, but who had also shredded three targets in the practising yards after Fire Lord Ozai had officially announced Prince Zuko's treachery.

Seen only by the afternoon sun, General Sheng's mouth curled upwards in a predatory smile. Perhaps he'd take his new Fire Lord's suggestion after all.

* * *

Mai stared ahead into nothingness as she moved, her eyes resolutely ignoring they boy at her side. He should have been behind her. Both of them knew that. True, he was from a noble family as well, but at this moment he was acting as the person appointed personally by the Fire Lord to be her escort.

Then again, it wasn't as if they hadn't broken enough traditions today. And so Mai just ignored him as they walked together, side by side, down the bustling roads and the brick-paved lanes which closed around them in their solitude. Neither had spoken since the words that had bound them to their ruler had left their lips. And yet enough hung in the air to make them uncomfortable.

Mai hitched a long, annoyed, breath. She was starting to get sick of it too. And yet she wasn't going to say anything. Silence was more familiar to her, after all. She could deal with silence. And despite the confusion in her stomach wanting words, wanting explanations... _You. You were the boy with the wires..._ a part of her also didn't want to hear them. The part that quailed with realisation that they were walking towards her house. That she was walking from the arms of one prison... into another.

"What did you mean back there?"

The words sounded ridiculously loud given the background noise of the Fire capitol, but Mai didn't miss a beat. She kept walking instead, her eyes still focused on a non-existent horizon and her body never betraying the sudden gratefulness that he'd broken the silence and her thoughts. "What are you talking about?"

He didn't miss a beat either, not even shifting as he caught the bait and tossed it right back at her. "You promised to follow him. Less than five minutes after you just wanted to 'get it over with'. What did you mean?"

She deflected the spoken blade with ease, flipped it around her knuckles, and then spun it back. "Why do you care?"

He smirked, opening his mouth like his wires and stopping it before it punctured his skin. "Because I'm Fire Lord Zuko's Chief Bodyguard, and I know what _I_ meant."

Now that was unexpected. The rhythm of the battle broke, and Mai had to hide the stumble under the folds of her clothing, the rebounding dart barely missing her heart. "You're Zuko's Chief Bodyguard?"

He inclined his head with a measured bow, but never stopped moving as he blocked the counter-strike of her gaze and turned it back with a spark of sliding steel. "Yes. And you're Zuko's future Fire Lady."

Her lips curved. "No. I'm just Lady Mai."

She watched with an amused satisfaction as the dart slid under his guard and burrowed into his chest. Shen Li's eyes opened wide. "But... I thought."

"Well, you thought wrong," she shrugged, and although she didn't consciously want to, she felt something inside her smile at the victory. They were almost at her house, there wouldn't be time for him to even the score. After all, it wasn't a very long walk, from the palace to her home...

Mai frowned as she suddenly realised that her feet had somehow taken them the long way back, and her companion saw it. Regaining his composure, he raised an eyebrow. "Something wrong?"

Mai flushed. "Nothing," she retorted, too quickly for her liking, and the verbal dagger missed him by a mile. She turned away from him in disgust, her failed shot taunting her in the shape of his grin. But when the familiar walls of her home approached, she glanced back and saw it fall from his face.

What it left there was startling. Since the lessons of her childhood, she'd always been careful to hide behind her carefully schooled blankness. And she was sure that he'd gone through something similar with his family's position. But now, she could almost read his thoughts as he shared her frown, his brow knitting as he stared up at the gates of her family's house. Gates which closed the likes of him out for now, and she...

Suddenly, the openness fell away, and Mai was left blinking as he shifted and spoke.

"Well, I guess this is where I leave you," he said.

"I guess so too," she responded emotionlessly, her eyes flicking away from his face to stare at the building. _Home_, she thought. It's home.

Somehow the thought wasn't as comforting as it should have been, and Mai sighed as she brushed the thread of the bell. Above them, there was a recognising shout, and the gates began to open. She watched the widening gap with dead eyes, preparing to walk through them and back into her own specially constructed prison of boredom. When it was large enough for her to fit through comfortably, she began to move, not even throwing a second glance back at the boy behind her. There was too much to think about, too much tension in trying to keep herself from screaming in despair as the memories of her life forced her to acknowledge that the awakened feelings from the Boiling Rock had no place beyond these walls.

And then he spoke again.

"I'll be back, you know."

Her eyes widened, and she spun around. "What?" she demanded, her voice sharp with surprise.

He smiled at her, and a little part of her mind registered that it was a nice smile, a type with which she was unfamiliar. It wasn't the reptilian smile of the politicians her family had always mingled with. It wasn't even the blithe, carefree smile of other teenagers she'd met who had no concept of a world outside their own. It was knowing, a smile whose owner had seen as much of the world as she had, and yet it was also broad enough to suggest a freedom that she was only just beginning to realise how much she was hungry for.

Mai blinked, and then he was speaking again. "I will come back, Lady Mai," he smiled again, and she was about to utter a vicious retort when he finally relented and explained. "Despite your protests, I think I know Fire Lord Zuko well enough to know that he'll ask for you."

"So what?" Mai asked, trying very hard to force the boredom back into her voice. She gave up after less than a second and drew herself tall instead, staring at him as if he were nothing but a servant born to bow at her knees. "You'll come down here and fetch me?"

The smile dropped from his face, and he gave her a measured look. "I doubt it will be quite like that, my lady."

The gate was completely open, and she didn't have to turn her head to know what lay beyond it, waiting. Under her sleeves, her hands suddenly shook. "Well I don't care," she said, her eyes hard as their gazes met. "Tell Zuko I don't want to see him. I'm sure that the Fire Lord has better things to do with his time."

And with that, she walked proudly away, her chin high in the air. And it was only when she heard the gate swing closed again with a shudder, blocking her from his view, that she let her shoulders fall and the reality of her imprisonment sweep over her again.

* * *

Free.

That's what he'd said, that's what they all said, but she still couldn't quite believe it. Kama breathed in the wonder of it all as she laid her wrinkled hand down on the bedspread. The silk was soft... so soft she needed to touch it again to make sure it was real. Needed to glide her skin across it until it wrapped around her fingers like the cool ribbons of her element. She closed her eyes and breathed. Never, never had she remembered such opulence. Not in her cherished memories of the South Pole, not on the ships that had brought them here, and certainly not in the black, ugly dungeons that had caged them for so long.

Kama's fingers tightened on the blanket briefly, and then she released it. Turning around, she opened her eyes and found her smile anew. The room was probably only medium sized compared to some of the others in the Palace, but compared to the cramped cells she'd been trapped in for over thirty years, it seemed like a mansion. The ceiling was light and airy, arcing protectively over the two large wooden beds plumped with pillows and down. Another two beautifully carved wooden chests stood at their feet, their depths filled with what were probably elegant yet simple clothes, but which to her feasting eyes seemed like finery. The floor itself was richly carpeted, so that when her bare feet walked across its surface she felt like she was sinking into the comforting cushion of finely ground sand and seaweed. The covering stopped at a door, which was slightly ajar enough for her to realise that it led into a bathroom, which was lighted like everything else by the massive windows that rolled down from the ceiling to the floor, letting the sun pour in like liquid gold. There was also another door, she noted. One that led outside into the courtyard that their room bordered upon. It was draped with golden coverings that shaded the garden beyond from her view somewhat, but already her palms were itching to see. If everything, everything was so exquisite, she was sure that nature itself could only be more so...

But of course, in the far corner, there was also her sister.

Kama sighed, and then turned to approach her sibling, her feet sinking wonderfully into the carpet. Even as she focused on the tightly clenched curl of her sister's shoulders, the white-knuckled hands crossed over knees drawn up to her chest, she couldn't help but luxuriate in the feeling. So different, _so_ _different_ from the stone and the chains.

She shuddered briefly and then reached her arm out tentatively. "Kata?"

There was no response. Kama's face fell. Even before their years in the dungeons, where each moment they had managed to snatch for themselves had been treasured, they had always been close. She couldn't remember the last time her sister had shut her out like this. She couldn't contemplate it. They'd needed each other so much to simply survive, and now... "Kata... _please_."

"Please _what_?" Kata snapped suddenly, and her sister stepped back at the rage she saw. It wasn't because she'd never seen it. It was because it instantly threw her back into the cage that had been her world for every tortured second of the last three decades. Her lips drew back over her teeth in recognition. Rage. Hatred. They'd lived on it when they'd been in prison. Survived off it. They'd had no choice; it was the only thing strong enough to keep them breathing as around them, their fellow waterbenders were tortured, were raped, were beaten. There could be no hope in a world where everyone they loved sickened slowly and died, until it was just the two of them left hanging from their chains while the metal-clad, blood-coloured soldiers beat them and smiled. When life was only the passing of minutes counted by the way the chains rubbed against bleeding flesh and re-scarred skin, anger and loathing were the only things they could cling to.

Kama swallowed, trembling just a little on the inside. "Kata, please, just..."

It faltered, sank, and then the plea died on her lips. What could she say? Please stop hating? Please stop raging? She couldn't, because she hadn't herself. She didn't think she ever would either; the headstrong, hopeful, loving teenager she'd been when she'd been taken had been beaten and drained out of her, wrung from her heart like the water had been from her nerveless fingers.

But now... they were out, at least. They were out, and she'd heard his words. Words of change. He'd even invited them to dinner in two nights time, and the former Earth Kingdom prisoners would have their royal meal in three. She would have laughed at the notion if it wasn't so ridiculous. After thirty years of chains and hatred and insanity, the _Fire Lord_ had invited them to _dinner_.

But then again, as that strange, scarred youth had shown, he was not the Fire Lord who'd imprisoned them.

Kama wavered. The hatred still bubbled in her blood, ready to encompass her at any moment. And yet something else also ran through her now, a tiny thread of something that she'd thought had died a long, long time ago with her best friend. Kama bowed her head briefly in remembrance and honour. Aisha hadn't deserved to die like that. Not slumped against cold stone, her blood and kindness running from her lips as the soldiers had come to drag her away.

No one deserved to die like that except for the Fire Lord...

The Fire Lord. Confusion swept in her again as she remembered the new Fire Lord, the one whose words and upturned face had stirred up that feeling in her veins again. She didn't even dare name it, she was so afraid that it was all a dream. But it was there, whether she named it or not, and now every particle in her body was screaming for her to nurture it.

Hope.

Kama raised her head and looked at her sister, the only source and carrier of love she'd had for the last three decades, and felt the silence go away.

"Please. _Please_ start living again," she whispered, and her hand was on the other's cheek before she could think. "You haven't said anything since he spoke."

Kata flinched away. "What would you have me say, sister?" she asked bleakly, and at that moment she looked like she was seventy, not a woman of fifty-five. Her eyes swept scornfully over the room. "How pretty everything is? _Anything_'s pretty after thirty years of hell."

Kama bit her lip, the coldness in her sister's voice making her legs shudder away. But just as quickly as the weakness had come, the strength came back and she steeled herself as she walked over to the door leading out into the garden. Kata had always loved the outside. It was probably what had broken her so much when they'd been caged. But now.., now...

Kama peeked past the hangings, and what she saw through the glass made her heart leap suddenly with joy. "No," she breathed. "It's _beautiful_."

And it was. Whoever had chosen their room had chosen it well, she realised. Probably with them exactly in mind, and she could help but feel overwhelmed with wonder at the thought. And then the joy was buoyed by pure excitement, sheer delight, and she suddenly couldn't contain it anymore "Dear La, Kata, it's beautiful! Please, please, you have to come see the..."

"It's probably locked," Kata interrupted bitterly, refusing to even lift her glance. "Stop fooling yourself, we're still prisoners."

A chill wind seemed to bite into her heart, and her eyes narrowed. "We always will be."

There was a beat, just long enough for her to recognise what her sister was saying, and then Kama froze. Despite the fact that it was only a few hours past midday in the Fire Nation, she suddenly felt like they were back home again, in the South Pole. Her fingers, which had been resting on the innocuous looking handle, suddenly dropped and she stepped away. "You sound like Hama did," she said flatly.

Kata lifted her chin. "Good," she snapped back. "Hama got away."

It was enough to make her see red, and the glowing warmth of the beckoning sun from the world outside turned cold. Kama whirled around. "Yes, Hama got away... and left us all behind!" the old betrayal seemed to seep up through her skin, choking her with its bile. "You saw what she did, Kata. In the end, family meant nothing to her. She turned into one of them when she forgot us. Don't you _remember_?"

The words rose up desperate in her throat, and suddenly she was a little girl again, a little girl at her mother's feet. "Don't you remember what we were taught, the ways of our tribe? To always love, because there was enough harshness around us in the ice. To always be kind, because that's how you beat back the snow. And to always treasure our family, because that's all we have!"

Her sister said nothing. Kama felt her words die away, the echoes swallowed up by the carpet and the high ceiling, and helplessly she clenched her fists. The silence was in the air again, and Kama hated it. Prison had been silence - locked away in separate cells and only knowing the tearful gazes of your loved ones as the guards rattled on the bars and told them to shut up. And they were no longer in prison, so she broke it. "Don't... don't you remember?" she whispered.

And with that, Kata suddenly cracked. "You want to know what I remember?!" she demanded, leaping to her feet with wild eyes. "I remember hearing the screams of the raped and dead. I remember how they chained us so our arms almost ground out of their sockets. I remember the sound of your ribs cracking when they broke them. Don't you remember? I do! I do, and I couldn't do a thing about it! I could only scream..." she choked, "And that made them beat you harder."

Kata felt the sobs, low and childlike, seep up into her throat. "I love you, Kama. I love you and they beat you, they hurt you, they nearly killed you. And I had to watch while I dangled from my chains. I don't remember anything else, Kama. I can't. I just remember your face, and their fists, and the blood."

The old waterbender took a deep shuddering breath, and it felt like a knife in her chest. "Don't ask me to remember home, Kama. Because I can't. Not after what they did to us. I just _can_'_t._"

There was a silence. Deaf to the world, Kata heard nothing but the raspy sounds of her own breathing, the boiling heat of her hatred. Across the room from her, her sister bowed her head, and Kata was so wrapped up in the trembling of her veins that she didn't even register that the door to the small garden was open.

"Do you remember this?" Kama asked inaudibly.

Kata blinked. It took a second for the water to soar through the air, and less than that for the delicious, refreshing cold of it to soak through her clothes and into her skin. But it took more than a minute for her to realise what had happened.

Kata blinked again. Her sister was smiling - the shining, beautiful smile she remembered when she was younger, so full of love and hope. It was different now. Its lines were tired, and it was old and broken and unfamiliar... but it was there.

And its owner had just thrown a ribbon of water at her.

Kata looked up, slowly. With new, water-soaked eyes she finally noticed the garden for the first time, the open door, and the small stone fountain in the center. The small fountain where water, clear, pure water was bubbling with gentle abandon.

And two minutes later, the two sisters were completely drenched. Laughing and squealing like the girls they'd been, they spun around the courtyard splashing water at each other. Anyone who happened to share a window out into the small garden would have been shocked at the sight - two women wizened by torture, starvation and imprisonment past their years dancing arm in arm around streams of water surging exultantly through the sky. But Kama didn't care. They were free, they were together, and they had their element back. The world of prisons, war, and confusing Fire Lords faded out until it was just them, them in their water and in the grass, them stepping free in air unconstrained by chains and guards. And as they twisted in circles, spinning around like a whirlpool, she didn't recognise the pattern they'd unconsciously picked up.

White and black.

Yin and yang.

Light and dark.

... life and death.

* * *

-

-

-

A/N II: I really have to stop it with these late nights. But at least it's here, yes? Although I guess now is a good time to mention that I'm basically heading into exam month soon. I promise I'll try to update as much as possible, but I'm afraid that there's a pretty big possibility I'll slip. Still, once it's over, I'll definitely be back and writing, so don't give up on me yet!

That said, I really hope you enjoyed this chapter, and I'd just like to thank again everyone who's reviewed. You guys and girls make my writing worth the hours not spent studying and the sleep deprivation. Thank you, and please do review again. And if you haven't yet, please do. It's great to know who's with me on this ride. : )


	13. Verdict

**Chapter 13: Verdict**

Disclaimer: Mike and Bryan, the show's creators, own Avatar: The Last Airbender, completely. I'm only showing my love of their world by playing in it.

A/N I - First of all, I'm so sorry for being a week late. My exams are drawing closer, and things have been rather hectic. But despite it all, and despite how difficult this chapter was to write, it's finally done. So I hope you enjoy. :)

_

* * *

This is the sound of the present,_

_This is the spell of the past,_

_This is the time of the verdict,_

_And this time the future will last._

* * *

Toph crouched, digging her toes deep into the dirt and letting every vibration of her surroundings sink in. A few seconds later, a grim picture began to unfurl in her mind. The devastation of yesterday's battle was still written in the soil, the evidence unmoving and deathly where they lay. Trees too were sprawled across the land, their roots dry and cracked in the air where they'd been bended out of the ground. Amidst it all, she could feel ripped grass and the scorched bodies of insects caught in the crossfire. Toph bit her lip. And then resolutely, she extended her senses to what she was looking for, the big, solid feeling of protection and impregnability, and despite it all, the frown turned into a grin. _Yep. It's still standing._

Toph blew an errant strand of hair away from her face. "I have to hand it to you, Twinkletoes," she drawled. "For a guy who started out life tossing breezes around, you make a pretty damn fine wall."

And it was. It had lasted for a little less than twenty-four hours now, a miracle in itself, splitting the land neatly down two sides so that neither the Earth or Fire soldiers could touch each other. She supposed it had to do with the fact he'd raised it when he was in the Avatar state... but still. The workmanship definitely deserved a grudging compliment.

"What can I say?" Aang shrugged, turning to her with a tiny smile on his face. "I had a good teacher."

"Smooth," she acknowledged with casual affection, reaching out to punch his arm lightly. The smile broadened on his face and they stayed like that for a few moments, two twelve year olds sensing the destruction around them and marveling grimly at the power of hate. But of course, even that strange sort of peace couldn't last for long.

"Avatar Aang?" they heard the heavy crunch of sandals on gravel, and both of them turned at the same time. Aang bowed his head slightly at the visitor.

"General Iroh. What's up?"

The old man chuckled. "Do you want the long version or the short version?" he asked wryly. "Or I can do both if you want to be here for the next few days."

"The short version'll do," Toph brushed the dirt off her hands and stood. "I have a bad feeling we're still going to be pretty busy today."

"I think you will be right, Miss Bei Fong..."

"Toph." She cut him off crisply, and Iroh coughed.

"Eh, my apologies Miss Toph. But yes," the general squinted at the sun. "The short version is that King Bumi is getting ready to depart for Omashu. He's found a few of the refugees from his city, and some of them are still loyal enough to follow back."

"Ah, Bumi," Aang said with a wistful smile. For a moment, he looked like he was far, far away from them, and Toph couldn't help but wonder at what he was thinking. "We'll be sure to see him off. What else?"

"That's the only piece of good news, I'm afraid," Iroh's brow furrowed. "Jeong-Jeong and Master Piandao are still staying with the Fire Nation soldiers. The Earth Kingdom civilians are still uncomfortable around them even though they saw what they did on the day of the comet."

Noting that the old man's feet were still very firmly planted on the dirt just outside the outer wall, Toph smirked. "They still trust _you_ though, right Mushi?"

The smirk faltered when he sighed. "They tolerate me," General Iroh said sadly. He shifted, and laid one of his hands on the great wall at his back. The stone was already hot to touch in the morning sun. "Which is to be expected, and understood. In fact, it might even be considered a bit of a miracle. Still, I have managed to reestablish some of the connections I had since I was last here. But that brings me to my next point."

Toph felt the earth shift a little as the general turned to face Aang, his heartbeat slow and solemn. "Ba Sing Se was in dire straits already when we arrived all those months ago. Despite its size and structure, a city simply cannot take in so many diverse refugees without seeing a dramatic decline in stability. I fear that it is even worse now, with people still reeling from the harshness of Fire Nation control and the suddenness of the end of the war."

Aang narrowed his eyes. "What are you saying, Iroh?"

"I'm saying that without careful guidance, Ba Sing Se is dangerous. An explosion waiting to happen. All it will take is one uprising or outbreak of hostility, and the fear and hatred will overflow again."

Aang remembered the horrible sound of screaming earth and fire, and shuddered. "Like yesterday?"

Iroh shook his head grimly. "Yesterday was just the beginning. I fear for this city, Avatar Aang. That's why I want to ask you to stay for a while until things straighten out. Be the figurehead this city needs while the search for Kuei goes on. Perhaps even stay after that if you're needed."

Aang gulped. The last time he'd been in Ba Sing Se, things hadn't turned out too well. In fact, he'd developed somewhat of a strong disliking to it. Given Appa and everything else that had happened, it was hardly surprising. "But how about you? I mean, you have all these connections in Ba Sing Se. You'd probably be able to help quiet things down, right?

Iroh's face shadowed. "Even with the people I know, I am ultimately the general who almost took the city years ago. Everyone important in Ba Sing Se knows this now. I am afraid I will not have as much influence as I like. Besides, I think perhaps that when the time is right, I will take an extended trip back to the Fire Nation."

"Hang on," Toph suddenly cut in. "What happened to 're-conquering your tea shop'?"

"My tea shop will always be here for me," the general acknowledged. "But perhaps I will not always be here for it." A look of pain crossed his face. "I was... naive, perhaps, to think that I could retire permanently. Yesterday's battle has proven me very wrong already, and it has led me to question what I had assumed. If things are so bad here, I can't imagine how bad it will be back in the Fire Nation. Zuko... I'm sure he's doing fine, but perhaps he will not mind his old Uncle helping him out once in a while."

Aang frowned, the memory of his visions in the Spirit World suddenly swimming back to the surface. "Yeah, I wouldn't be surprised if Zuko's having a hard time. Maybe we should come back with you. I mean, we only really came here to save Zuko's soldiers."

Iroh gazed at him steadily. "I'm afraid your work is not done, Avatar. Not with Zuko's orders to keep many of the troops here." The general pulled a face. "And really, while I understand the logic behind it, I am concerned about the possible consequences. On the one hand, sometimes it is best to try sealing wounds while they are fresh. On the other, you may cause infection if you move too fast. Keeping the soldiers here to help out with rebuilding is a good move both economically and practically, but with tensions running so high in Ba Sing Se alone, someone powerful but neutral is needed to make sure it does not end in the beginning of another war."

Toph heard a cricket-moth chirp. Aang exhaled, the smoothness of his bald head furrowing at the thought. "You know, when you put it that way, it really doesn't seem like I have much choice, do I?"

Iroh smiled sadly. "Ah, Avatar. We always have a choice. Whether or not it leads to what we desire is another question."

Toph frowned. "Damn. I _hate_ Ba Sing Se."

"Oh?" Iroh seemed a little surprised, but then he caught himself. "Is it the structure, Miss Bei Fong?"

"_Toph_," she waved a hand dismissively. "And yeah. Rules, rules, rules. I don't know if I can spend too long here without going insane."

She quietened. "Besides, I was kind of hoping we could get to Gaoling sometime, now that were back in the Earth Kingdom. You know, uh, to visit my parents."

Aang turned to her in concern. "Hey, it's okay Toph. You can go see your parents if you want." He tried to smile, even though his insides had suddenly twisted with the thought of being left alone. First Katara, then Zuko and Sokka, and now Toph. He wasn't sure if he could take it. The smile faltered. "I know how much you didn't enjoy Ba Sing Se the last time we were here. I'll understand if you go, I promise."

Iroh watched with interest as Toph ears pinked, followed quickly by a scowl of epic proportions. And then she thwacked the Avatar in the arm. "Hey! You're not getting rid of me that easily, Twinkletoes. It'll only be until Kuei comes back. My parents can wait. Besides, what would you do without me?"

Aang's smile returned in full force. "I don't want to find out, Sifu Toph," he laughed. "It might involve having an unbruised body for once."

She whacked him again for good measure. Iroh smiled as the two bickered. "You know, it might not even be so bad, Miss B-... Toph. The last time you visited Ba Sing Se was very different. Now, even though the rings are still in place, the city is more volatile than stable." A sudden thought occurred to him, and he folded his arms into his sleeves in satisfaction. "Who knows, with the Avatar by your side and the Dai Li scattered, _you_ may even be the one helping to make the rules."

There was a pause. And then Aang's eyes grew comically wide, just as Toph's smile narrowed into a truly frightening grin.

"Twinkletoes and I in charge? _Sweetness_."

* * *

She was being childish.

She knew this. It wasn't difficult. Heck, it was _obvious_. So obvious that even a girl groping her way through the dark could grasp it. And Mai _wasn_'t in the dark, most of the time. As quiet and understated as she was, as wonderfully as her bored exterior camouflaged her, she was instead often privy to more secrets than she felt comfortable with.

So Mai could see the immaturity of her actions. Quite clearly, if she wanted to be rational about it. That, however, didn't mean that she had to do anything about it.

"Why should I care?" she shrugged. "I'm sure he'll give up eventually."

Perched on the top of the sofa across from her, Ty Lee let loose a loud, expressive sigh. "Oh, but you haven't seen him, Mai. He's been standing outside looking all lost and lonely. For over five hours! Your guards haven't even let him into the courtyard, so people keep giving him these odd looks from the street!"

Mai reached out and lifted another grape off the plate next to her. A small pile of seeds was rapidly accumulating on its surface, a silent testimony to how long they'd been having this fruitless argument. "I'm sure someone like him can handle a few weird looks," she said dismissively, popping the fruit into her mouth. "It's not like they'll kill him."

Ty Lee shook her head, and then curved her body upwards into a handstand as if the world from upside-down made more sense. "I don't get you, Mai," she said, beginning to walk across the top of the couch, never wavering even as her hands sunk into the precarious cushioning. "You were behind him yesterday at the coronation and everything, and now you don't want to see him?"

Mai bit rather savagely into the next grape. "I just don't want to, all right? Can't it wait?"

"It's really not so bad," Ty Lee began hand-walking backwards. "He was fine to me this morning. Really nice, actually. I don't remember him being so un-bad moody. In fact, you should have seen his aura! It wasn't all black and muddy greens anymore. There were these nice dark reds and even gold and shiny yellows!"

"You know I don't believe in auras," Mai said absentmindedly. "And just because Zuko made you his Public Relations officer doesn't mean anything for my situation."

Ty Lee paused, hovering. And then her voice became serious. "You're still mad at him, aren't you?"

Luckily for the couch, Mai's hands were empty as she clenched them suddenly in the folds of her robes. "Of course I am," she muttered. "He left me, Ty Lee. With a letter. A damned _letter_."

Ty Lee carefully lowered herself into a bridge position, her hands and feet planted firmly on the couch while her stomach arced towards the ceiling. _Here we go again_. "I don't know, Mai. He seemed pretty insistent that I come talk to you about seeing him after his messenger said you weren't coming out. Maybe he wants to get back together?"

Mai wavered for a moment. It seemed as if she'd liked Zuko forever now, from the crush she'd had as a child to the love that had seized her so unexpectedly when she'd seen him again. And now she was confused. She was still angry, there was no doubt about that. And she still loved him. She'd told Azula as much on the platform at the Boiling Rock. But his leaving, the prison, the coronation... something had shifted within her.

Mai pursed her lips. _What does love mean, anyway?_ she wondered. _I used to daydream about becoming Fire Lady. Sitting next to him on a throne. Helping him at the war meetings. Protecting him when he needed it. Fighting for him when he needed it._

"Maybe he does," she finally said, her voice slightly hoarse. "But maybe _I_ don't want to. Has he thought about that?"

Ty Lee froze in midair. "Mai..."

"Is that what everyone thinks?" Mai sat up suddenly, her eyes narrowing. "That now that I'm out and he's Fire Lord, we'll just get back together? Is that what he thinks?"

She remembered Shen Li. "_You're Zuko's Chief Bodyguard?"_

"_Yes. And you're Zuko's future Fire Lady."_

"_No. I'm just Lady Mai."_

And the fact of it struck her across the face. That _was_ what everyone had been thinking. She shook her head in sudden disgust.

"Well that's just too bad," she frowned. "Because that's not what's happening."

Slowly, very slowly, Ty Lee lifted her legs back up until she could see her friend upside down again. "I thought you still loved him?"

It was such an innocent question. Mai's frown deepened. "And what does that have to do with us getting back together?" she asked bitterly.

Ty Lee blinked. "Um, it just seems kind of logical, that's all. I mean, when two people love each other, they become boyfriend and girlfriend, right?"

Mai hesitated. "Maybe... maybe this is different," she said haltingly. "I..."

She stopped. She remembered. Things had seemed so.. so _muddy_ after he'd left. The fire inside her had been so erratic and confused and hurt. But things were gradually becoming clearer now, now that she'd seen him again. Seen the difference. And there had been such difference...

Mai swallowed. She'd known, or thought she'd known the boy she'd gone out with for those brief weeks. He hadn't seemed so hard to figure out then. He was wild, as tempestuous and uncontrolled as a forest fire. To touch him was to burn, even when he was still. She'd been so... _happy_ to be with him then, to have her childhood dreams come through. But now as she looked back at their time with a more objective eye, she could see the problems. Like how when they'd touched, none of his fire had seeped through. Like how his kisses had tasted oddly of desperation and distance. Like how their words had seemed so meaningless. The only time they'd made connection, made any real connection was when they'd been angry at each other, at the Beach and at the Boiling Rock. And those were the moments when the boy she was comfortable with knowing as the angry, raging Prince had shown his depths to be much, much, more.

Mai closed her eyes. And yesterday... yesterday the Prince had become the Fire Lord. Had been regal with every step he took. Spoken words that had fired her heart and bound her to him even though the idea of kissing him somehow become foreign to her. After all, she didn't know this boy. This man. She knew who he'd been, knew enough of _what_ he'd been to have meant her promise to follow him. She still cared enough, maybe even loved enough. But the betrayal and the hurt and the anger had taken its toll. And with the time spent contemplating what kind of future she wanted in that hellhole of a prison, she knew that she wanted something more. _Deserved_ something more.

"No." She said. "This is different. I know it is." She wet her lips. "I... still care for Zuko. I know that," she let out a harsh laugh. "I don't think I can contemplate a world without that, actually. But I also know what I want, now. I want someone who can work with me. Who can treat me like an equal. Who can trust me to watch my own back. Who.. who connects with me when we talk."

Mai paused. Ty Lee waited, a silent gesture that Mai acknowledged with a nod. "I want so many things. And I'm beginning to see Zuko's not the answer."

Her eyes turned to flint at the memories. "He left me. Three times. Without saying anything. So no, I don't want to get back together, and I don't feel like talking to him right now either."

Ty Lee bit her lip. "What about the boy outside?"

"He'll give up," Mai said with dry conviction. "I'm sure being Chief Bodyguard only gives him so much spare time."

Ty Lee stopped midway in her handstand walk, arcing her head up to smile upside down at her friend. Of course, given the position she was in, it looked rather like a frown. "Chief Bodyguard? It's just one of Zuko's messenger people, actually. You know, the ones he sends to deliver royal commands and stuff?

Mai blinked "Not Shen Li?" she said blankly, and then suddenly scowled at the stupidity of her assumption. _And those strange gnawing feelings of... disappointment? No. That can't be right. _"Oh well, so it's a royal messenger. He can afford to wait for a few days."

Ty Lee paused, and then twisted her balance to her left hand. "But can you?" she asked pointedly as she concentrated hard on the floor. "Come on, Mai. You know stewing here like this isn't doing you any good. Even if you hide in here, you'll still have to talk to him sometime."

At the silence, she carefully shifted her weight back to her right, slowly lifting her left until it was parallel to her ears. "You might even feel better afterwards. At least you won't have to constantly think about it! And it can take as long as you want it to as well. I mean, look at it this way. Either Zuko gets mad and you can feel better about it, or you'll both be happy with it and you can finally start moving forwards again! Maybe even start looking at other boys! That's a win-win situation, right?"

From her lounging position on the couch, Mai blinked. The fruit dropped back on the plate unnoticed. "You're kidding me, aren't you?"

Ty Lee's grin could have been seen in Ba Sing Se. "Why not? I mean, what else have you done since you got back home? Mope around and avoid your parents? A few dates wouldn't be too bad, would it? At least they'd give you something good to do!"

Despite herself, Mai gave her friend a rare, treasured half-smile. "Given my track record? I don't think I really want to be jumping into another relationship anytime soon."

"Pfeh," Ty Lee arced her back. "Don't start closing off your options before you start! What if you meet like, the perfect guy? Or like, this totally fated romantic opportunity falls into your lap?"

Mai couldn't help it. The half-smile became a full one."Don't be right," she warned her friend. "Things always get more complicated when you're right."

There were no more word needed than that. The acrobat laughed happily. "Oh don't be silly, Mai!" she flipped back to her feet and started bouncing down the corridor, showing no ill-effects whatsoever from her extended time upside-down. "Now come on, let's make you a free woman!"

Mai raised her eyebrow, moved languorously to her feet, and followed behind more sedately. "Whatever," she said, unconvinced. "At least it definitely won't be boring."

* * *

It most certainly wasn't.

Ty Lee left her at the entrance to the throne room for 'some privacy'. The guards hesitated before letting her in, explaining that he was still holding court with his advisor, but when the messenger showed them his decree the doors opened without a creak. Mai walked through slowly, steeling herself like she was preparing for a battle. And then she glanced up, and realised something that she hadn't expected.

It was the first time she'd seen him sit on the throne.

He looked small somehow, or perhaps that was the distance between them and the great vaulting arches of the ceiling and his fire. Mai paused for a moment at the sight, her expression unreadable as she tried to gather herself. Even though she'd seen him yesterday, accepted the differences in him as further proof that she was right in wanting to stay separate, it was hard to reconcile the objective knowledge with all of her subjective memories of him. He'd been an angry boy. Now, he was a regal figure on a throne, removed from her by gold and royal robes, and the hesitation from her was enough for her to hear the last few words from the man currently holding court with him.

"... perhaps with your uh, friend's help the Water Tribes will be convinced. It will take some doing, though. The stories of unrest from there do not sit well from me."

Zuko seemed lost in thought. "No," he muttered. "Not with the Earth Kingdom's hostility either... Mai!"

Mai held her ground. "I didn't know you were busy, Fire Lord," she said neutrally. "My apologies. I'll come back later."

Zuko blanched. "No, it's all right," his gaze switched back to the man in front of him. "We were just finishing, weren't we Chief Advisor Hui?"

The old man bowed, then turned to nod at her. "He's right. These problems might be solved better after a night's sleep. I'll leave him to you, Lady Mai."

She barely heard at him, her eyes firmly settled on her ex. They stared at each other over the sound of the door closing, and suddenly Mai was more than content to be still, silent, and let him have the dubious honour of venturing the first word. Her chin lifted a little. He deserved it.

And he didn't disappoint, either, Zuko swallowed, his face uncomfortable against the reflection of the flame. "I... I didn't expect you to come so soon."

Mai arched a perfect eyebrow. "Want me to leave?"

"No!" the word burst from his mouth, and then he quieted. "I mean, well..."

She watched as he cast his gaze around, noting the coldness of the stone, the hardness of the tiles and gold, the vastness of the space. "Actually, maybe we should." He stood up suddenly, the fire falling to his feet with a crackle, his eyes on the doors outside where the guards stood. "Let's talk in my study."

He'd barely gotten a step when she rolled her eyes. "Come on, Zuko. Does it really make a difference?"

He paused. "Yes, actually, it does," he said, his voice deceptively casual. "In my study, we won't be disturbed by anyone unless it's really important."

His eyes flicked to hers. "And right now, I don't want to be disturbed."

Mai wanted to laugh. It didn't feel joyful. She felt the words rising up in her throat; dry, cutting words that could end it all in half the time it took to walk to his stupid study, but then she restrained herself. Even if he didn't deserve it, _she_ did. A long talk could end it properly.

"Fine," she said, and the single syllable sustained them both all the way out the throne room, down the various corridors and through the passageway into his study.

Mai frowned as he closed the door and turned to her. She'd never been to the study before. While the floor-length window looking out to the city created the illusion of space, it felt far too small to breathe at the moment. Then again, perhaps it was just her.

Zuko shifted. "We can talk now," he said unnecessarily.

"Good. Where do you want to start?"

Zuko paused. In the space between them, she suddenly became utterly aware of how the mid-afternoon sun highlighted his scar. He looked uncomfortable in his royal robes now, the crown an unneeded ornament in their privacy. A painful smile crossed his face as he looked at her. "How about 'I'm sorry'?" he asked quietly. "I know it's overdue. I know I hurt you when I left. I know I hurt you before I left, when my anger and my confusion just got too much for me. And I'm _sorry_."

A deaf person could have heard the sincerity in his voice, the raw honesty and hurt, and unbidden, a dull burn rose up behind her eyelids in response. For a moment, Mai was frozen in complete shock, and then she pushed both the burn and the stillness angrily away.. No. _No_. They'd barely started. _She_'d barely started. She was not going to cry now... she was surprised she could even recognise it.

She couldn't remember the last time she'd wept. It must have been years.

"Okay, fine. You're sorry," she swallowed hoarsely. "That changes nothing."

He missed a breath. "How can you say that?" Zuko demanded. "It... it's all I can do." He clenched his teeth. "Mai, I'm _sorry_. I didn't mean to leave you, I didn't..."

She cut him off. "Do you even know what you're sorry for? How you hurt me?" she shook her head. "I don't think so. And while you don't know, you can't be sorry. So there."

He stared at her, irritation beginning to mix in with the sorrow in his face. "I thought I just... no. Fine. How about you tell me, then, since I don't know? How about you say something out loud, for once in our relationship?"

Her contemptuous gaze turned his sorrow into bitterness. Zuko dropped his hands and turned away from her. "Oh wait, I forgot. You telling me something might mean expressing yourself."

Mai froze, and then laughed this time. Out loud. It tasted terrible. "You want me to express myself? Fine. Then you'd better deal with what you get, Zuko, because it's your damn fault I'm feeling this way." _It's your damn fault I started feeling at all._

Mai took a breath. The hurt that had ripped her open from the moment she'd found the letter, so many weeks ago, swirled through her insides like molten lava. "I'm a warrior, Zuko. You said it yourself. I can take care of things. I can take of myself. So why... _why_ if you felt like you were so right about turning against your Father... why didn't you bring me along?"

The sight of his shock turned the bitterness like a wheel inside her. "I... cared for you, Zuko. I told you that. You could have at least told me to my face. I would have followed you."

"Mai, I..."

"I'm not finished yet!" she snapped, and he subsided. "I turned on Azula for you, Zuko. Doesn't that tell you something?"

His gaze was heavy. "It does now. But Mai, I... I never meant to hurt you. You have to believe me." Something grew strong in him as he remembered, and he set his shoulders back from where they'd slumped at her words. "I did the right thing, Mai, I know it. You... I couldn't have brought you into that."

She stared at him, hard. "You didn't even think about it, did you?"

She was surprised when he answered without hesitation. "You're right. I didn't."

Mai felt the corners of her mouth press down tightly. So it was out there. Out loud. She'd been right, and the knowledge of that hurt more than she wanted to. And with it came a fresh conviction.

It was over. Truly, irrevocably over.

Something in her face must have changed, must have set, because he spoke again, more urgently this time but with no less surety. "I couldn't have, Mai. Don't you understand? You still think I was wrong to join the Avatar, don't you? But I look around this study, this place where my Father wrote down the orders for war and the letters of death, and I know that even though I hate all of it, I'll still try and use my position to help. I've seen things you can't even comprehend, Mai."

Perhaps it was the confidence in his voice, the strength and conviction coming from the erratic youth she'd known which unsettled her. Or maybe it was just because he'd gotten her angry. "I'm not a sheltered little girl, Zuko! You left me for two weeks in prison, that alone should be enough!"

"The warden," he said, and she couldn't help but blink at the change. "Did the warden protect you?"

_Well, well. Deja vu. _"The warden's my uncle, you idiot," she snapped. "Of course he protected me. But that didn't mean I wasn't locked up in a cell!"

He passed his hand over his face, steepled his fingers to his forehead. "You don't even know what I'm talking about," he said with a strange sort of awe, and then shook himself out of it. "No. I know you're a warrior, Mai. But there's so much I can't explain to you. You were locked up for two weeks, Mai. And I'm sorry for that, I really am. But I... I was banished for over two years. I spent what seemed like a lifetime staring out into the sea and wondering why the world hated me."

"Oh have a tissue," she rolled her eyes to cover up the sting of his words. And then she stopped when he glared at her.

"I'm not finished yet," he said, and she took a moment to appreciate how quick the reversal had been. "Would you really have followed me, Mai? You've never seen what I have. The people in the dust. You haven't heard what I have. So many words of hate. Why would you turn against everything you know? You said I'd betrayed my country."

She bit the inside of her cheek. "I betrayed my country too. When I was saving _you_."

He halted, suddenly unable to meet her gaze..

"Why would I turn against everything I know? Perhaps because I _care_," her voice cracked a little, and she hated herself for it. "I care about you, Zuko." _I loved you._

The hiss and snap of the fireplace was the only sound in the silence. He raised his eyes back up again to meet hers. "Is that what you meant?" he asked quietly. "When you promised to follow me?"

The dynamics of the room shifted. She stepped back. He stepped closer, his face open but unreadable. "What did you mean, Mai? You've been talking like it's over. Like we're over. But yesterday you promised me that you'd follow me. Did you... did you even know what that meant? I once had a duty to find the Avatar. Now I have a duty to try to mend this broken world. Can you even comprehend what that means?"

She said nothing, transfixed by the finality of it all. The flaring, tempestuous, spoilt Prince was gone. In his place stood a quietly determined Fire Lord, his piercing golden eyes shining with controlled fire and intensity.

She wasn't sure she knew who he was.

"I'm sorry, Zuko," she said quietly, and even though she was still angry, she felt the importance of what he was asking overlay her own turmoil. Although when they'd gone from talking about hurt and sidestepping the issue of them to saving the world she didn't know. "I don't go for the big and grand gestures. So no, maybe I can't comprehend this 'broken world' of yours. But what I do know is that you're the Fire Lord, and I'm a warrior of the Fire Nation." _You're Zuko, and I'm Mai._ "So yes. I will follow you. I will make sure no other two-bit assassin tries to end you. I will use my knives to fight for your cause if you ask me."

"And if I ask you to forgive me?"

The strange calmness around her shattered. The anger came rushing back to fill the void. "No. You don't deserve that yet. You don't deserve _me_."

He winced. "Mai, I'm sorry. I _am_. But that's all I'm asking. Forgiveness now, nothing else."

"Oh Zuko, you still don't get it," she wanted to laugh, but it would hurt too much now. "At the end of the day, it's not even about forgiveness. It's about the fact that you couldn't _see_ me. You couldn't trust me enough to have you back when you needed it. What was I actually to you, Zuko? A pair of arms?" She remembered the first night back in Ba Sing Se, when she'd said words and he'd buried his face in her shoulder, and a sudden pain stabbed through her heart. Her uncertainty at his spurts of fury when they'd been together, her forced musings in prison, her unchecked thoughts at home... they all coalesced together in with a sudden clarity that she was surprised she hadn't seen it earlier. "Was that all I was to you? Is that all I am to you now? Just comfort? Something safe to hold onto?"

Zuko's face twisted. "Don't, Mai. Don't put words in my mouth."

Her mouth compressed. "Is it wrong if its true? We never really connected, did we? I could never help you when you were angry. You never told me about what was truly wrong."

"That's because you never let me!" Zuko growled, his fists balled at his sides now. "Damn it, Mai, I tried too. Tried to get _you_ to connect with me. Tried to make _you_ happy. But whenever we'd talk and we started going somewhere, you'd... you'd kiss me. Or start talking about ordering servants around, as if that could fix my problems, as if that could fix any of our problems!"

She was stung. "You wanted me to fix your problems? What else did you want me to do, win the war singlehandedly and heal your scar?"

The words were like a bucket of water. Zuko calmed himself slowly, controlling his breathing through gritted teeth. "I'm sorry," he glanced away from her.

_I'm sorry too. _"You should be."

Another silence. She was getting so sick of those. Its clarity began to leech away at the anger, leaving her listless, drained, and wishing she could go back to the days when she didn't have to feel anything besides boredom.

"So what now?"

She lifted her head, oddly reassured by the confidence in his voice. It was funny how he could still sound so in control, even when he was deliberately throwing the ball into her court. "We agree that we can't do this," she said neutrally. "We agree that we don't _want_ to do this. You help save the world, and I... I try to find a place in it, I guess."

The question in his look burned through her skin.

"I did mean what I said, Zuko," she said quietly. "I do still care. And I will follow you."

"But what does that even mean?" he asked, just as quietly.

Mai opened her mouth, ready to say anything. But before she could, the study door suddenly crashed to the side and both of them leapt backwards, her hands going automatically to the senbon concealed beneath her robes and his settling into a firebending position.

"Zuko!"

Shen Li burst into the room in a rush of paper and armour. "Zuko! They told me I'd find you here. With... oh. Lady Mai."

He inclined his head, and she snorted at how he could still be so gentlemanly when something was clearly wrong. Besides her, Zuko stepped forwards in concern.

"What's happened, Shen Li?"

The guard captain straightened. "What we were worried about," he said grimly. "A number of reports have just reached us from the inland towns and villages, some of them small they don't even have messenger hawks. There have been attacks by Fire Nation soldiers."

Zuko swore and spun around, his robes flying out behind him as he regarded the map on the floor. Mai blinked. Her eyes had been pretty much focused on Zuko the entire time they'd been in the room, and so she hadn't seen the rows of blood-red figurines scattered across the centre of the floor.

"It has to be them." he muttered. "But why?" he glanced back up at Shen Li. "Did they give any more details?"

"They gave abundantly more," Shen Li said dryly. "Most of those villages have been destroyed. Burned down completely. The refugees are all heading towards the capitol here. It's the boys who were sent ahead who gave the reports. Whoever these soldiers are, they're claiming they don't recognise your sovereignty."

Zuko narrowed his eyes and scanned the map again. "The scouts?" he asked, his voice clipped.

Shen Li shook his head. "Nothing. And we did arrange that they'd give us daily reports with the messenger hawk."

"How well trained are they?" Zuko demanded. "Could they have forgotten?"

Shen Li shook his head again. "They're fresh from the Academy, but they're exceptionally well-trained, young, and eager. I'd have expected two reports a day instead of none at all."

"Damn it!" Zuko swore. "As if we didn't have enough trouble already. What with the Water Tribes and the Earth Kingdom... and now a not-so secret army." He shook his head in disbelief. "Agni. Fire Nation soldiers. Attacking my people."

Mai frowned from where she'd been regarding them, listening. "An insurgent movement?"

Shen Li paused, his questioning eyes instantly flicking to Zuko. Zuko didn't even bother to nod. "Yes. We only suspected it at first, but these reports are pretty conclusive. Not to mention our scouts' 'mysterious' disappearance."

He paused, glanced at the stewing Fire Lord, and went on. "I don't like this," he declared bluntly. "We're already in a fairly vulnerable situation, especially with most of our soldiers still overseas..."

"Or in the 'secret army' itself, I think," Zuko finished grimly for him. "You're right, this isn't good. I just wish... aargh!" The Fire Lord banged down on the arm of his throne in a distinctly undignified manner. "If only I could go check it out myself! I just want to know what we're up against and what we can do. Strengths, weaknesses, negotiations, bargaining, or... Agni help us, even fighting. We need information for all of that!"

Mai got there before Shen Li could. "No," she said bluntly, forcefully. "You can't afford to just fly out there wildly now, Zuko. Not when things are so unstable."

Zuko ground his teeth. "I know. Damn it, I wish Uncle was here! We need someone out there, and not just the scouts. Someone with experience. Someone I can actually _trust_. Not just well-trained scouts still wet behind the ears."

A sudden gleam came on from behind Shen Li's shadowed eyes. "My Lord, you've ruffled a fair few feathers with my appointment... but if I could be so presumptuous as to suggest I take a brief leave of absence? Say, two or three days?"

Zuko caught on immediately. "Will two or three days be enough?" he queried. "It'll take you at least a day to travel inland far enough to start your investigations."

Shen Li grinned, despite the strain on his face. "Then I'd best get started, my Lord."

The sheer speed at which everything had unfolded was enough to make her blink. Between them, Mai could feel her heart beating rapidly against her chest. But then, as if to prove that her body had grasped things faster than her mind, she felt words rose up in her throat. "I'm going too."

In the silence that followed, Mai wished she could stare at herself as well. _Now where did that come from?_ a part of her wondered clinically. The question was a good one; mere moments ago it felt like all she could think about was how to throttle her ex without killing him. Still, it didn't take as long as she thought it would to find the answer.

After all, She'd promised to follow him. And hadn't Ty Lee mentioned moping around and avoiding her parents?

Zuko picked his jaw off the ground. "What did you just say?"

Mai shot him a withering look. "You heard me," she straightened her shoulders. "I'm going too." Her mind began whirring again, the possibilities of the future and the arguments preventing it leaping quickly into life. "Anything that can take down five trained Fire Nation scouts will need at least two people to investigate it."

To her surprise, the guard captain merely looked at her appraisingly. "The point of this mission _is_ stealth," he countered.

Her eyes narrowed at the challenge. "Fine, I'll go alone."

"Wait, wait," Zuko found his voice again, raising his hands as he stepped between the two of them. "Who said you're going anywhere?"

Mai glared. "And who said I'm not?" she snapped back. "Remember, I can handle myself. And besides, you _owe_ me the opportunity to get out of my house and away from my family."

The Fire Lord shook his head in disbelief. "If that's what this is about, you can stay in the palace! Mai..."

"Two or three days, Zuko," she cut him off. "That's all your precious Chief Bodyguard can afford. But me? I can go for much longer, you know that. All we have to do is tell my parents I'm going away again, for you this time. It'll make sense since I stood behind you at your coronation at all. Besides, they were used to me following Azula."

He opened his mouth to say something. Mai lifted her head, her amber eyes hard. "Are you going to stop me, Zuko?"

The Fire Lord pulled back. It was funny, Zuko thought briefly at the back of his mind. She sounded like she normally did. Dry. Bored. Careless. And yet, this time he was sure that the layer of steel underlining her tone had just cut through his chest like a knife. Her pale face was regal as they matched gazes, so certain and determined he almost drew in a breath.

She had never been so beautiful. And yet, she had never been further away from him. In vain, Zuko tried to search for the small spot of softness in her eyes that she'd always reserved for him, the one that he remembered as a child and which had drawn him to her that first night in Ba Sing Se...

But it wasn't there. It was gone, and somewhere inside him, he felt his heart physically clench in recognition.

And yet...

In its place, something else shimmered. Zuko leaned closer almost unconsciously, drawn by the strange, distorted reflection of himself in her irises and the little spark of mystery he didn't recognise. It seemed to smooth out her angular face, bringing a startling, quiet strength to it. And suddenly, even though she seemed so far away from him, he knew that he had never looked so deeply into her soul.

"No."

The word was hoarse after the silence. Zuko swallowed, and repeated it louder, and then seconds later saw the change come over her. In an instant, she shut away from him, the mirror into her soul closing up before his very eyes, and it took him just a little longer to realise what it meant.

"No, I won't stop you," the words came tumbling out, and suddenly he couldn't stop them even as she glanced back up at him in surprise. _Mai. Feeling. _"I won't. You're right, I owe you that."

He shook his head again, this time more to himself than anything else. _I can't believe this is happening. _He suddenly remembered the other occupant of the room, and shifted to face him. "Shen Li?"

The guard captain smiled easily at the unspoken question. "You won't even miss us, Fire Lord."

Zuko didn't blink at the reacquired formality. Somehow, it seemed strangely comfortable coming from the other's lips, almost grounding as it helped ease him back into reality once more. Zuko sighed and stepped backwards. "I'd better not," he grinned wryly. "But you're right. I should be able to hold down the fort here with Sokka and Suki. Chief Advisor Hui is proving himself useful as well."

As quickly as he'd flashed it, Shen Li's smile suddenly dropped from his face. "Be careful with Hui, Zuko," he warned, all the jovial formality in his voice vanishing with his smile. "I may have just been a simple guard captain before you came, but even guard captains have ears. And eyes. And guts and gut instincts."

The fire crackled. "I can handle Hui," Zuko said confidently. "He's an opportunist. As long as I'm Fire Lord, it's worth his while to help me."

Mai frowned. "Don't get too sure of yourself," she warned. "And watch your back. I'd hate to think we went to all that trouble yesterday just to come back and find you dead."

Zuko didn't deign to answer that. Instead, he pinned her with a piercing look. "You be careful," he said. Perhaps it was the way he said it, but it almost sounded like an order. Mai watched as he turned to face Shen Li. "You _both_ be careful."

"We will," the guard captain promised. "I mean, what could possibly happen?"

The laughter in his voice made Zuko groan. "Don't tempt me," he muttered, and the guard captain chuckled as he inclined his head and moved to the door. Mai shook her head and followed, her mind on the hours ahead. It wouldn't take too long to gather up her traveling gear again. Even less to outfit herself again. And then they'd be away from here, out into the heart of the Fire Nation and away from the capitol and its ruler...

Suddenly, Mai stopped.

And to the surprise of them all, she turned back to face Zuko and bowed. Just high enough to leave her with the grace of a queen, but just low enough to make her point. And when she raised her head again, Zuko was staring at her, his golden eyes wide and transfixed.

"My Lord." she said formally.

And then she turned and walked out of the study, Shen Li at her side, never looking back at the stunned Fire Lord she'd once dreamt of marrying. And it was oddly fitting that as she stepped into the corridor, a strange sense of finality and purpose settled onto her shoulders and the bundle of nerves and hurt eased.

No more questions. No more anguish. The verdict had been made.

It was over.

* * *

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A/N II- I must say, I came painfully close to not posting this tonight. I wanted to give Mai the space she deserved, especially since I know many of you really like her. But then the characters leapt in and started writing themselves, and I couldn't do anything but follow. So I hope it worked out all right, and they still came out okay.

Thanks again for reading. I hope you enjoyed it. And as always, comments and reviews are very, very welcome.


	14. Silver

**Chapter 14: Silver**

Disclaimer: Mike and Bryan own the characters. The fans own the 'ship. And I own the words.

A/N I - Sorry for being one week late again! I can now very thankfully say that my exams are over, so between my work I should be able to write steadily again. :) Thanks once more to all of my reviewers. I can't tell you how much your words mean to me. I hope you all enjoy!

* * *

_Can you see the moon tonight?_

_The silver drops of stars?_

_They are the tears of loss, my child,_

_Of loss and grief and scars._

_Yet see how still she shines so bright?_

_And gifts us with her glow?_

_That is the look of strength, my child,_

_Of hope for friends, not foes.

* * *

_

The river murmured comfortingly next to her as Katara shaded her eyes in the afternoon sun. The glare of light off the water was unbearably bright, but strangely comforting as she moved her heavy braid slowly to one shoulder. Wincing, she reached back blindly to the dull throbbing at the base of her skull, closing her eyes in mute relief when her glowing water finally made contact.

She sat there for a while, concentrating on focusing her energies in the awkward position. As the ache finally began to recede, she exhaled and brought her bruised shoulder back down again. The water shimmering through her fingers lost its glow, and she saw dull wisps of iron-red as she streamed it back into the river.

Katara frowned and stood up shakily, checking herself meticulously once again to make sure she hadn't missed anything important. When her search yielded nothing more than her shoulder, she healed that too and then settled back down against the river bank.

Well.

Eyes half-closed, the waterbender recounted the day's battles in her mind, and then those of the afternoon before. There had been four attacks in the short span of those few hours, and at all but one she had arrived too late to save the village itself. Katara's fists clenched unconsciously in the folds of the purple dress.

Whoever these people were, they were frighteningly efficient and well-prepared. And what was even more frightening was that they were _competent_. The back of her head twinged in memory at one of their lucky shots, and Katara's mouth turned downward again. She'd travelled long enough now to know the value of a stupid enemy.

Still, clever or no, even a contingent of them was just an intriguing challenge for a waterbending master with a river at her back. Katara's lips lifted again into a weary smile as she dipped her toes into the water. The ripples spread out softly, pushing gently against the current. _I just have to be more careful, _she decided firmly.

The sudden picture of the man on the heap of broken things crawled into her mind. Her eyes narrowed. _And more wary. _She had no doubt that something more than just a few random attacks was afoot. At each and every site, she'd been greeted with the same sickening chant. The one which spat poison in the air and coiled around her heart like a vice. The one which had forced her to wonder after each fight whether it was a message to get back. To warn Zuko. To warn Aang. To warn everyone that what they'd fought for was already fracturing.

But then the soft pulse of determination which had replaced the tight, painful clutches of uncertainty had resurfaced. And now as Katara trailed her fingers in the river, she felt the surety of it sweep through her like the ocean. She had nothing yet. Nothing but words and worries and the few isolated faces of people she was sure were soldiers.

And besides, if she left now _not that she wanted to, she was still relishing this heady taste of freedom and the feeling of the future running in her veins _then who would protect the villages? No. She'd stay until she knew exactly what was happening, exactly why these people were turning against their own countrymen and declaiming their rightful Fire Lord.

"_We will not back down for the Avatar's lackey! We will never bow to the traitor Prince!"_

Katara's eyes hardened. They'd been well trained enough to retreat from her the last few times, leaving her with the blackened husks of homes and small crowds of terrified Fire Nation villagers who had burns and bruises which needed to be treated. She shook her head. She wished she could have healed the scars too...

The image of golden eyes rose in her mind for a brief moment, and then they closed. Slowly, she remembered laying her fingers down his cheek, cupping the roughened tissue and tracing the maze of hardship and hatred that had led them to this moment, this frozen moment amongst the crystals and the rock...

The thought trailed off as Katara suddenly became aware of a distant throbbing in the water. Her eyes snapped fully open as she plunged her hands down to the elbows, feeling the currents swirling at her ankles and stretching her consciousness out like the thin mist in the Spirit World...

There. She could almost taste it, the sharp-sliced ripples of three small metallic prows cutting through the water at least two miles downstream. And despite the exhaustion weighing down her bones, Katara straightened with a cold smile.

And five seconds later, the slim figure of the Painted Lady was lost in an ethereal cloud of fog.

* * *

If Sokka had to be honest with himself, there was only so much lazing around he could take.

Fine, fine. Right after the comet, he'd been completely ready to do nothing but eat, sleep, and snuggle with Suki. Surely after everything he'd deserved it. And there was the matter of his broken leg too, he'd practically been ordered by everyone around him to rest. Still, now that the haze of victory had died away a little and they were left with the rush and chaos of the forthcoming peace summit, he was beginning to feel jittery. Like he needed to do something. Every night Zuko slid into the chair at dinner looking more and more exhausted, the crown pinned at the top of his head weighing him down so much he barely had the energy to get annoyed when Sokka prodded him.

And that would just not do. Because when the jerkbender didn't even blink at "Oh yeah, Suki and I spent the day tearing down the East wing of your fancy palace", something had to be done.

So here he was, eyeing the door to Zuko's chamber. Sequestered off to the left of the throne room, the entrance was one of the few formal ones in the palace that wasn't blocked by material. Instead, the solidity of the door was a symbol to all those coming to seek court with the Fire Lord that he was busy or meeting with private guests.

Which, of course, was just why Sokka shrugged and pushed it open without a second thought.

The Fire Lord's chamber was small by palace standards, but still large enough to dwarf even the communal tent Sokka remembered at home. He found Zuko's form immediately, hunched over a large desk groaning with files. The way the room was set up, the Fire Lord's chair sat close to the wall and to a second exit at the left, a system practical and paranoid enough to make Sokka roll his eyes.

"Hey Zuko," he called out cheerfully.

The Fire Lord jerked, almost knocking over the tepid cup of tea next to him. He was up on his feet in an instant, settling into a firebending pose just before he realised exactly who his visitor was. There was a moment of surprise, and then he snorted and sat back down again. "What are you doing here?"

Sokka shook his head in mock disapproval and limped over. "Gee. No 'how are you?' or 'nice to grace me with your awesome presence'? Where're your manners?"

Zuko rolled his eyes tiredly and picked up his papers again. "Nothing important, then?" he asked dryly.

Sokka sank into the chair opposite the desk and grinned. "Does everything _have_ to be of earth-shattering magnitude? Can't I just drop by and wonder what's been going with you?"

Zuko's eyebrow arched. "What, you mean you're taking up my offer to help read paperwork? Thanks Sokka. I never knew I had such a good friend."

"Ha ha, " Sokka screwed up his nose. "But seriously. What's up?"

Zuko interlaced his fingers. "Really? Far too much. I have no clue who to trust besides you guys, Shen Li, and perhaps my Chief Advisor. And besides the trouble in the Fire Nation, we're starting to get messengers back from the other lands about the peace conference..." a sudden thought struck him, and he seemed to straighten up. "Actually maybe you could help me. Do you know the Chief of the Northern Water Tribes?"

Sokka's ears pricked. "Chief Arnook? Yeah, I know him. Why?"

"We've been having... difficulties with him," Zuko pinched the bridge of his nose. "Him alone actually. It's strange. From what I can decipher from King Bumi's letter, he's all set to come when he's settled his people back into his city. King Kuei still hasn't been found yet, but we've had the peace overtures from Ba Sing still haven't heard back from the Chief of the Southern Tribes either..." Zuko pulled a face. "Okay, fine. Perhaps it's not just Chief Arnook."

Sokka laughed. "Kuei'll be fine. He knows us and Aang, so we shouldn't have too many problems on his side. As for the Chief of the Southern Tribes, you were probably looking in the wrong place."

He paused, and then a shadow of worry fell across his features. "Come to think of it, Dad should have heard by now that the war's over, wherever they are. Maybe I should go look for them."

It took Zuko over three seconds to put it together. And then his eyes opened comically wide. "Wait! The Chief of the Southern Tribes is your _father_?"

"Yup," Sokka shrugged, looking at him curiously. "What, didn't we ever tell you?"

"No! No, no-one ever told me! Agni..." Zuko felt a rush of blood hit his cheeks. "And all those times I called Katara a peasant..."

Sokka took a brief moment to remember, and then he doubled over laughing. "Aw man," he chuckled. "That's right. You always did act a bit hoity-toity, didn't you your highness?"

The burn reached the tips of his ears. "Oh shut up," Zuko muttered. "You sure as hell don't _look_ like you're a prince."

His eyes grew thoughtful. "Katara, on the other hand..."

Sokka didn't seem to have heard him. "Hey," he straightened up indignantly, as far as the cast would let him. "I'll have you know that I can look royal too, thank you very much."

Zuko looked at him. Sokka self-consciously tugged his tunic into a semblance of smoothness.

"Right then," Zuko said ironically. "Well, your highness, what can you tell me about Chief Arnook?"

Instantly, a contemplative look slipped over the other's face, and Zuko had to blink in surprise. "Well, he's a father too, actually. He had a daughter. Yue."

Zuko was about to demand he get to the point when he recognised the quiet yearning on his friend's features. Instantly, he softened. "Your girlfriend?"

Sokka gave him a lopsided smile. "Yeah, actually. The one who turned into the moon."

Zuko nodded, remembering. "How did that happen, anyway? No one ever told me."

He regretted the casual words the instant they came out of his mouth when he saw the pain cross over Sokka's face. "It was Zhao," the water tribe warrior said softly. "Zhao killed the mortal form of the moon, Tui. And then Yue sacrificed herself to become the moon spirit."

Zuko frowned. There were so many questions there left unanswered that he wanted to ask more, but one glance at his friend told him that this was neither the time nor person to ask further. "She sounds brave."

"She was," Sokka bowed his head a little.

There was quiet for a moment, a perfect stillness that only seemed natural in the face of such pain. It was only when Sokka shifted again, turning away to surreptitiously wipe at dry eyes, that Zuko spoke.

"Do you think that's why Chief Arnook is being... difficult?"

Sokka straightened, business settling onto his shoulders once again. "I wouldn't be surprised," he nodded. "Although we've still got something we can use. Your Uncle was there when it happened. He even threatened Zhao and attacked Zhao's soldiers when..."

He fell silent, not needing to speak the words. Zuko's heart reached out to him even as his mind whirred. _Uncle..._ "So _that_'s why they called him a traitor," he muttered. "I... I always thought it was because..."

He took a breath, not wanting to go back to the sharp brutality of those days. "Actually, we may have something more than that. I fought Zhao before he died. People must have seen it, we fought in the middle of the city. I... Yue has been avenged."

Sokka's gaze widened, and then suddenly they took on a dreadful intensity. Blindly, he leaned forwards and gripped the edge of the desk in front of him to steady himself. "You killed Zhao?" he whispered..

Zuko shook his head. "No. We fought, but then the Ocean spirit took him."

There was a breath, and then the darkness in Sokka's eyes drained slowly away. "La," he said quietly, sitting back. "La."

Zuko fumbled with his hands in the stillness. What could he say? _I know how you feel. My girlfriend just broke up with me for good. _But meaningful words wouldn't come. Mai was still alive, even if she wasn't his. He remembered her cryptic farewell and pondered. Or at least, she wasn't his in the sense that they had been. Zuko knew without a doubt from their conversation and the look in her eyes that they would never be together again as partners, equals. But then...

As he glanced at Sokka's face, saw the ocean's depth of feeling wash over him like a tide, he wondered whether that had ever been the case.

"I'm sorry," he said finally, his voice rough. "I'm sorry."

Sokka's head snapped up. His eyes were rimmed with loss, the unspoken pain growling deep in his throat. "Don't," the warrior responded fiercely. "It wasn't your fault."

Zuko didn't flinch, the empathy and the yearning in his own eyes unwavering. "I know. But still."

And at that, they shared a look between them that bridged worlds; two young men who had spent a lifetime building defenses around their hearts. Yet for the space of those precious seconds, their matched gold and blue gazes were soft and unguarded, the truth in them transcending their budding friendship to become something rare and solid.

Sokka smiled crookedly.

"Thanks, buddy."

Zuko inclined his head. "You're welcome."

There was a companionable rustle as Sokka slumped back down in his chair and Zuko self-consciously turned back to his paper. His eyes fell on the blur of tiny characters without really seeing them. He wanted to ask so much. He wanted to ask how Sokka had found Suki, how they had forged their relationship over such loss. He wanted to ask how Sokka had built this different kind of love, a love no less strong, but clearly different in the surety of their smiles and the playful sparring between them. He had never known Yue, but he saw that the water tribe warrior in front of him had something unique in both of his relationships - some unreserved feeling that transcended words.

Perhaps it was because he was still hurting over Mai. Perhaps it was because he was still _confused_ over Mai, and what exactly her promise had meant. But Zuko saw a glimpse of possibilities through Sokka's face of a love that would never wane on either side, that was more than whispered nothings and silencing kisses.

And he wanted it.

Zuko's musings were broken by double knock. Instantly, he was the Fire Lord again, his eyes alert from where they'd been lost in yearning. "Come in!" he called, recognising the code.

There was a pause, and then the door opened. Almost by instinct, Sokka stumbled to his feet, gripping his crutch as he swung around to meet the startled eyes of a Fire Nation messenger. Gaping, he looked back at Zuko's unruffled features, the facade of the ruler smoothed over his face again.

"Uh, Zuko? Expecting something?"

Zuko's shoulders moved in a barely perceptible shrug. "You have something to report?" he asked the man.

The Fire Nation messenger hesitated, his eyes slanting to Sokka with uncertainty. Then he seemed to come to a decision, stepping around the table and leaning down to the Fire Lord's ear. Sokka's eyes narrowed as he heard the faint murmur of words. And then Zuko's gaze widened, and he turned back to his friend with the tiniest hint of a smile.

"What's up?" Sokka asked suspiciously, falling back into his protective guise with barely a ripple. "Why are you grinning like that? Stop it! It's unnatural."

Zuko's smile only broadened. "Surprise, Sokka."

"What?" he demanded. That was it. Zuko had gone crazy. "What are you talking..."

His voice was cut off by the sound of the door opening again. A man walked in, tall and proud and still in his red prison garb. But the hint of blue threaded in his hair was unmistakable, and Sokka felt his heart constrict once in his chest and then burst out with joy.

"DAD!" Sokka yelled. And then his crutch slipped and he fell over.

* * *

Kama didn't know what to expect. It had been over thirty years since she'd dined with royalty, and even then she wasn't sure whether that experience really counted. Hierarchy was relaxed in the Southern Water Tribes, its importance overshadowed by family and friends for all but the most formal occasions. Even the Chieftain's children were never called 'prince' or 'princess'. They were just sisters, brothers, nieces and nephews, and that was the way that everyone had been comfortable with.

And so she checked herself nervously in the mirror again, her fingers flitting first to flatten the collar at her neck and then to smooth down the rest of her. She'd rummaged through the chest at least three times before she'd found the most suitable outfit. And now she looked at herself, ignoring the greying hair, the wrinkles and the bony protrusions to focus on the swirling blue and silver of the dress tunic. Below, a darker shade of blue swathed her legs, and the capstone of it all were the blue beads threaded through her fringe on the left side, hanging down just below her sapphire eyes.

Kama had to hide a smile. It was different, certainly. For one, the style was similar to what she remembered, but with enough edges to remind her of the disparities. Furthermore, despite her entire wardrobe being blue, it was clear that some of the pieces had been quickly dyed in preparation for them, and this was admittedly one of them. She brushed her fingers over the material, little doubt in her mind as to what the original colours had been. Still, she couldn't help but marvel at the mere thought behind the attempts.

The Fire Nation were a hot, raging, destructive race of peoples. She never would have believed that any of them could be _thoughtful_.

"You done preening yet?"

Kama spun around to see her sister, similarly bedecked in cerulean robes and shoes. She smiled for real, ignoring the sarcasm for what it was. "Kata, you look beautiful."

For a moment, Kata stared down at herself, the softness of the material and the smooth shimmer of the colour. And then she caught a glance of her face in the mirror and scowled. "We both look like skeletons."

Kama's smile faltered for a moment, but then fastened on again, resolute. The last day had been rejuvenating for them, to say the least. To sleep once more on something beside stone and metal had been heavenly beyond belief. To walk in the gardens and talk with her sister as loudly as she wanted to had been freeing beyond her imagination. And to take a bath unchained and by herself again...

Kama set her shoulders with a huff. She was determined that _nothing_, not even her sibling's rancour or dinner with the Fire Lord, would spoil it.

"Well then, at least we have an excuse for eating lots of food tonight," she said.

Kata opened her mouth, no doubt ready to repudiate even that, but whatever she was about to say was cut off by a confident rap on the door. Kama immediately turned to open it, her fixed smile becoming real again at the sight of the Water tribe boy from yesterday. Quietly, she let out a breath of relief. Despite knowing that the war was over now, and knowing that things were different, she wasn't sure what she would have done if Fire Nation guards had been sent to escort them instead.

"You two ready?" the boy asked cheerfully.

What was his name again? Ah... Sokka. "Yes, I think so," she bobbed her head. "Kata?"

There was a brief pause. "Right behind you."

The three of them swept out into the hall, as well as two weakened former prisoners of war and a boy with crutches could sweep. As they left the haven of their room, however, the two sisters were overwhelmed once more by the sheer expanse of the palace: the hardness, the redness and the gold. Taking a deep breath, Kata clutched Kama's elbow and tried to focus on Sokka's lighthearted chatter.

"And let me tell you one thing, Zuko knows how to put on a good feast. You should see the dining hall, it looks great! And I heard we're going to have _six_ courses, not even including dessert!"

She marveled at his blitheness, even while his broken leg was mute proof of his involvement in the soul-deadening war. But still, he moved like he was bounding across the tundra, all smiles and laughs. She struggled to keep up with his words as she tried to make sense of it all. "We're going to be in one of his private chambers, so it won't be too big, though. Just us, Zuko, Suki and my Dad. You remember Suki, right? Oh, but you haven't met my Dad. He arrived today, actually. You'll love him, don't worry. He's from the Southern Water Tribes too!"

Kama surged forwards eagerly. "He is? Oh, what's his name?"

"Hakoda," Sokka cocked his head. "You know him?"

"Hakoda?" her mind went blank for a moment, and then slowly, the image of a chubby five-year old swam up through her memory. "Oh La, Hakoda's your _father_?"

A pleased look crossed his face. "You knew him?"

She laughed giddily. "I helped babysit him! Oh..." her eyes went wide. "That means you're the chief's son."

"Yup," he grinned proudly. "I've got a sister, too. Katara." Here, his grin faltered, but then he shook his head and ploughed on. "She's a waterbender too, actually. And don't tell her I said this, but she's incredible. She was the one who found Aang, the Avatar."

Kama's eyes shone. "The Avatar?"

For a moment, the hope in her voice reminded Sokka so much of his own sister that he paused. "Yeah," he said, and then puffed up his chest again. "We all kinda helped him defeat the Fire Lord."

Kata said nothing, but she could feel Kama practically bursting with excitement besides her. "Can you imagine, a Southern Water Tribe Waterbender helping to end the war..." Kama marvelled. "I'd like to meet her."

Sokka didn't halt this time. "Hopefully you will," he said. "She's... not here at the moment, but I'm pretty sure she'll come back here when she's ready. Maybe if you're still around the palace, you can meet her," he turned to give her a measuring look. "You know, I think you two might actually get along."

"Wonderful," Kama said delightedly, and Kata was about to make a comment about living that long first when she realised that they had reached their destination.

The curtain swished softly to one side, revealing a large table with the candles and places already set. Sokka swung into the room like he owned it, collapsing happily next to the Kyoshi warrior they'd seen with him the other day. She smiled at them, rising. Kata let her eyes sweep over the rest of the room, a bitter taste of uncertainty in her mouth. She wasn't sure what to expect from tonight, and that made her edgy.

Yet next to her, her sister moved forwards eagerly. Kata shook her head but didn't manage to repress the softness of her smile. If Kama was determined to be happy, who was she to quash it? She would just have to be careful for the both of them.

At that, they both took their seats, Kata noting with surprise that the young Fire Lord had risen from his own to greet them before they settled down. Not that that meant anything, she told herself firmly. The gold of his eyes and the nature of his bending was enough to make him her enemy, and yet she would tolerate tonight if only to make her sister happy.

Kata sighed, and resigned herself to an uncomfortable night. The table was filled with halting small talk for a while, as much as discussing the recent events of war and peace could be called small talk. Even when a door to the right opened and brought in the first course for the night, the silence of eating was eventually displaced by conversation. If it wasn't more stories of the Avatar and his group's exploits in overthrowing the last Fire Lord, it was Kama, Sokka and Hakoda extolling the virtues of the Southern Water Tribe food that had been specially placed before them.

Kata, however, didn't absorb most of what they said. She ate mechanically, chewing and swallowing as if the wealth of sea prunes and fish before her was bread and water. It wasn't as if she couldn't hear them, oh no. Objectively she listened to the words as they turned to matters with the Northern Water Tribes, the invasion there, the Fire Lord's regret, _hah!,_ and even the matter of Sokka travelling there as an ambassador of sorts. She listened to Hakoda's reasoning, to Sokka's surprise at his father's acquiescence _Go where you're needed, son. I can't say how proud I am of you and your sister, and I wouldn't be so selfish as to not share my beautiful children with the world, _and even to the Fire Lord's thanks and assurances. She even picked up on the undertones that, without it needing to be said, everyone knew that Sokka would not go to the Northern Water Tribes alone.

But even though she was _listening_, it didn't mean that she was _registering_ any of it. Kata felt oddly cold in the heat of the Fire Nation and the warmth of the room around her. It was only when Sokka spoke again, this time directly to her sister and using a name she'd never thought she'd hear again, that she woke from her strange, disembodied stupor.

"But there's one thing I don't understand," Sokka frowned. "Hama told us she was the last waterbender left from the Southern Water Tribes. Why would she lie?"

The napkin Kata was clutching wrinkled. The fog that had been pressing down on her shattered in a moment of painful clarity. "You know Hama?" she asked in a strangled whisper.

The frown on Sokka's face deepened as he turned to regard her. "Yes. And it seems you do too."

There was a silent tension, the grim lines unspoken on Sokka's face matching the story untold on Kata's. Finally, Zuko cleared his throat quietly and lowered his chopsticks to the table. "Who's Hama?"

Sokka turned to reply, but before he could get there someone else interrupted him. "She was a Southern Tribe Waterbender, just like us," Kama said, her voice neutral.

Kata glanced in her sister's direction when it seemed no more was forthcoming. "She was the only one of us who managed to escape," she declared proudly, lifting her chin in defiance. "She was the only one of us who beat the Fire Nation at their own game."

"That's one way of putting it," Sokka said softly, and the tone in his voice made them all pause. Kata started in surprise. She'd written him off as a fool of youth when they'd first met, but now his eyes were deadly serious and there was no laughter in his face. "But I prefer to say that she lost, and lost badly."

Kata's heart leapt to her throat. "What do you mean?" she demanded raspily.

Sokka casually took one last bite of his sea prune, before lowering it unfinished onto his plate. "We found her as a successful innkeeper in a Fire Nation town. But once a month, she'd use bloodbending to imprison any innocent villager that came into her path. Mothers, children, old men. Nothing stopped her." He glanced meaningfully at the wizened woman before him. "You should have seen the prison she kept them in. Underneath a mountain, where no one would hear their screams. Oh, and permanently cuffed to the walls."

Kata did not have to look to know that her sister was ashen-faced. She swallowed. "Where is she now?"

Strangely enough, it was that question that made Sokka falter. He coughed uncomfortably as everyone at the table turned to him, enthralled by the twisted drama he was telling.

"Well, uh, actually... she's back in prison."

"WHAT?!"

Kata didn't know what she was doing until she was standing, her eyes burning and her fingers out like claws. "You locked her away again?" she hissed. "After all those years of torment she'd already suffered..."

"We had no choice!" Sokka responded angrily. "You didn't see her. I think... I think it made her insane. And it wasn't as if we could just take time off from trying to defeat the Fire Lord to make sure she didn't hurt anyone else!"

Kata's fingers balled into helpless fists. "Do you have any idea what it's liked to be locked up for most of your life? For longer than you remember? To watch your sister be beaten into the ground?"

From the struck look on his face, she knew that she'd hit something. "Well that's what happened! So don't you dare presume to judge us!"

"Kata..."

The warning tones of his sister were almost enough, but not quite, to stop her. "We were left in prison to rot! And now you're telling me that she's back in there?!"

"Lady Kata."

This time, it was the male inflection and the title that brought her up short. She jerked her head up to see the Fire Lord's gaze resting on her, and suddenly a wave of anger so strong it almost knocked her off her feet made her clutch at the table for balance. He seemed to take her silence as acquiescence, and so he spoke while she trembled.

"Lady Kata, I don't think apologies could ever be enough. But for what it's worth, I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry for what my father and my father's father have put you and your tribe through."

Kata saw a curious mixture of red and electric blue flash across her eyes. "You're right," she spat. "Apologies are nothing when Hama is still in prison!"

"Kata that's enough!"

This time her sister bodily yanked her down, and she stumbled into her seat with a crash. Kama let go, ignoring her sister, and then upheld her palms over the table. "I would apologise," she said quietly. "Except that I would rather explain. It is difficult surviving on anger and hatred for over thirty years, and even more difficult to break our way out of that pattern. I'm afraid... it will take some time."

From where he'd kept silent throughout the confrontation, Hakoda nodded. "I understand," he said, and spread out his hands to mirror hers. "When Kya, my wife, was killed in a Fire Nation raid... I didn't think I could ever see the Fire Nation again as anything but an enemy which had to be brought down. But then I was rescued from prison by my son and his golden-eyed friend," he nodded his head in Zuko's direction, "And I realised that I'd lost sight of the fact that I was angry at one man, not a nation. And then I was glad, because I'd found that to hate an entire nation is... exhausting."

There was nothing but the sound of the fireplace crackling, its warmth settling in the room once again. Kama swallowed, tears in her eyes. Kata kept her head bowed, but her face had softened. Zuko looked across the entire table, at all his former enemies and the people his nation had wounded so keenly, and was touched by a sense of awe. Because no one was dead, no one was yelling any more, and instead of an atmosphere of murder, Kama and Hakoda's words had shown strength enough to carry a hundred warring nations to peace.

He smoothed his fingers on the tablecloth. "It is an honour to sit together tonight with such incredible people," he said quietly. "I only wish that there was more that I could do... which brings me to a matter that I was planning to save for later, but which perhaps might be better addressed now."

Kama stared at this youth, this Fire Lord who she'd never imagined, and wondered. He continued. "I don't know what you plan to do with your freedom, but I do know that I will try to help as much as I possibly can to help you back home, or do whatever else you want."

"How about Hama?" Kata asked softly, her eyes never leaving the table.

Kama cursed under her breath, but then to her surprise found the Fire Lord looking grim, but thoughtful. "From Sokka's story, it sounds like she is a grave danger to my people," he started. But when Kata jerked up to argue, he kept going. "Nevertheless, I see no harm in setting her free if she wishes to leave the Fire Nation permanently."

Despite herself, Kata smiled wistfully. "She always wanted to see the Northern Water Tribes."

Zuko's eyes gleamed. "Perfect. She can accompany Sokka, then. Perhaps you would like to join your friend too?"

Mutely, Kata nodded, too stunned at his proposition to do anything else. Beside her, Sokka slapped his forehead. "Ah, Zuko. You might want to reconsider that. I did kinda help put her in prison again..."

He stuttered to a stop when he caught the meaningful look in Zuko's eyes. _Oh. OH. Clever, _Sokka thought grudgingly, and then sighed. "Okay, fine."

"And you?" Zuko's gaze turned to Kama. "Will you join your sister?"

Sokka rolled his eyes at the Fire Lord's tone. "Don't feel as though you _have_ to," he said, giving Zuko a look that meant he'd have had a rib-full of Water Tribe elbow if they'd been sitting closer. "I mean, if you wanted to, you could even stay here. Living a five star life in the palace is some step towards restitution, isn't it Zuko? _I've_ sure been enjoying it."

Beside him, Suki groaned. "Don't mind him," she smiled at Kama. "You know he's just joking."

Kama paused. "Actually," she said hesitantly, the idea just occurring to her. "I did want to meet your sister, Katara. And you did say that she'd most likely come back to the palace when she did, right?"

Sokka grinned painfully. "Probably."

Kama missed the look in his eyes as she thought about their room, the softness, the water outside, and the warmth. She was no fool. She'd trained for eight years as a healer before she'd been taken, and she had no doubt that returning home in her weakened state might be the end of her, Only the strong survived on the ice, and although she felt a fierce longing rip through her chest at the idea of returning, she was also sure that a few months longer would do no harm.

Besides, she did want to meet this fellow Waterbender. This hero.

"Then if I am allowed to, I would like to stay here," she caught the horror in her sister's eyes, and hastened to continue. "Not permanently, of course. I want to see home again... it's been so long. But I would very much like to meet this Katara."

A wry smile touched her lips. "Besides," she turned to the Fire Lord. "Your rooms are very comfortable."

Zuko blinked. "Of course you are allowed to," he said, his voice cracking a little. She should be demanding it, they both should; after all they'd been put through... "It's the least I can do."

Kata spoke up. "We can change our minds though, right?" she asked, sounding frightened.

He stared at her. "Of course," he exclaimed. "It's your futures that we are talking about."

Sokka hesitated. "Although if you want to come with Suki and I, we're leaving in a day or two."

"That should be more than enough time," Kata said, looking relieved, and Kama had a sinking feeling that she was going to have quite an argument on her hands when they returned to the privacy of her rooms.

Still, the opening of the side door from the kitchen was enough to shake her from her apprehension. The sisters watched with widened eyes as waiters cleared the table in front of them, and then loaded it once more with steaming dishes of food. Zuko hid a smile at their awed expressions, but Hakoda and Suki didn't bother, their quiet joy shining plainly from their faces for all to see.

Sokka, of course, was too busy wondering what to eat next.

"Shall we begin the next course, then?" Zuko asked ironically, picking up his chopsticks again. The words seemed to loosen the spell, just long enough for Kama to turn to Sokka with a dazed look.

"How many courses did you say there were again?"

"Sixthpfh," he managed to say through an impressive mouthful.

Suki groaned again, and the table laughed as they got back to it. For her part, Kama felt her smile broaden as she feasted her eyes on the array of food. After knowing the claw of hunger for so long, after having choked down the disgusting gruel year after year for survival... she could get used to this.

And so for the rest of that night, Kama didn't question why everything tasted so good. After all, she had perhaps a few months of this to look forwards to, and she relished the idea. She'd never thought that there would be restitution, or that it would come in such a flame-shaped package. But then, she'd never thought she'd one day be the personal guest of the new Fire Lord, eagerly awaiting the return of a fellow Southern Tribe Waterbender who had been an immeasurable force in ending the war.

But beside her, Kata picked at her plate, her appetite suddenly vanished and her mind frighteningly blank. She was going back home. Home, without her sister, but with her best friend.

She should have been overjoyed. She knew that. Because even if Kama wasn't coming with her this time (and she was still planning on arguing with her about that), they would be together again in a matter of months. Together again. Free. Home.

But she wasn't. Instead, her mind was frighteningly blank. And she didn't question why, despite all the dishes being objectively delicious, everything tasted like ashes.

* * *

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As always, I would be absolutely delighted (and ecstatic ^.^) if you left me some feedback. Thanks again for sticking with me!


	15. Fall

**Chapter 15: Fall**

Disclaimer: Not mine already. Don't sue. :)

A/N I: Once again, thanks to everyone who reviewed. I can't emphasise enough how much a part of this story you are - without you, I probably would have stalled or succumbed to writer's block long ago. Thank you.

* * *

_When trouble calls,_

_And chances fall,_

_Trust heart in deed, not wording._

_

* * *

_The map of the Northern Water Tribes seemed distant and shapeless. Sokka frowned as he stared at it, trying to figure out whether the errors were a result of summer meltings or holes in Fire Nation intelligence. But his mind blanked at the memory of the great, frozen city; the icy splendour which no cartographer's sketchings could ever hope to capture.

"... so I guess you can drop anchor here and make the announcement to Arnook. Do you think that's far enough, Sokka?"

The water tribe warrior blinked, and re-focused. "Far enough to what?" he asked wryly, leaning over to see where Zuko was pointing. "Not look threatening? Hate to remind you, Zuko, but where we're from, any hulking monstrosity of metal looks kinda threatening."

The Fire Lord looked up from where he was examining the map and scowled. "The battleship is the only way you can all get there quickly. I explained that already."

"Just what is the rush, anyway?" Suki asked curiously, absentmindedly walking her fingers across the parchment. "Sokka just told me that there's been trouble with Chief Arnook, but from all I've heard he sounds like a decent man."

Zuko pinched the bridge of his nose. "It's not all him," he explained tiredly. "Basically, all the nobility there are trying to get some kind of concession from us to prove that the war is really over. That's not my main concern, though, I think the battleship should serve as a good enough symbol. His letter hints that there are lobby groups in the Northern Water Tribes who are pressuring him to repudiate the peace talks."

Sokka's eyes went round. "You're kidding me. They want to _keep_ _fighting_?"

Beside him, Suki pursed her lips. "It's kind of understandable, though," she pointed out reluctantly. "I mean, they're probably still stinging from the invasion earlier this year. I wouldn't be surprised if many want revenge, just like what's happening in the Earth Kingdom."

Before Zuko could interject, Sokka shook his head angrily. "But Aang defeated the invasion! We..." he swallowed "They.... I know they lost a few... important people, but that's really been the first time they've been touched through this war. It's been the Southern Tribes that have taken the brunt of everything, and _Dad_'s more than willing to negotiate!"

Suki frowned. "That's true too," she admitted. "And the Fire Nation has been way more involved in conquering the Earth Kingdom..."

Zuko sighed. "Somehow, I don't think this kind of anger should be measured by who got attacked when. It's clear that there's just trouble, and I need people who I can trust there."

The look that passed between Sokka and Suki spoke volumes. "In that case, may I just say again that I think bringing Kata and Hama along is a really bad idea?" Sokka ventured. "I mean, you haven't met Hama, Zuko. I'm pretty sure she's a few icebergs short of a glacier. If there's trouble in the Northern Water Tribes, she'll probably be only too happy to stir it up."

"Then what should I do instead?" Zuko demanded. "Keep her in jail?"

"Well, yeah," Sokka responded bluntly. "I think you should."

Zuko stared at him in disbelief. "I can't believe that you, of all people, are asking me to do that. She's from your tribe! My people put her through hell, and you're suggesting I let her stay there?"

"She put your people through hell too," Sokka reminded him ruthlessly, his stolid face betraying nothing of what he had seen her put Katara through, put everyone through. "Innocent ones at that. Is that really any better? Come on, Zuko, think about it. She wants to avenge herself against the Fire Nation people no matter the cost. If the Northern Water Tribes are thinking about repudiating the peace talks, she's the last person you want there!"

Zuko shook his head. "No, I've made up my mind," he said stubbornly. "If that's what she wants... then so be it. I've been given more second chances than I deserve. It's time I gave them to somebody else as well." He paused and looked hopefully up at his friend. "Who knows? Maybe this time, if she's given her freedom and forgiven, she might change."

How could he argue against that? Sokka found himself opening his mouth out of instinct, and then slowly clamping it shut again. Then he shook his head and sighed. "Fine," he crossed his arms sourly. "Don't say I didn't warn you. But we are timing this so that it _doesn_'t coincide with the full moon. Got it?"

Suki frowned. "What happens on the full moon?"

With a loud, theatrical sigh, Sokka stood up, extended his left hand into the air, and then mimed astonishment and terror as it started clawing at his own neck. Suki and Zuko shared a confused glance, just before the water tribe boy began choking dramatically, flailing his arm around from side to side as he pretended to punch himself in the head with his right fist. Finally, he collapsed slowly to his knees, twisting like a bent puppet and jerking every so often until he landed in a heap.

He lay there for a few moments, breathing hard from his performance, and then levered himself up with his crutch. "See? _Bad_."

Suki looked at him askance. "What was that, now?"

Sokka huffed in annoyance. "What, you want me to show you again? Fine!" He moved his hands back to his neck, fully intent on choking the life out of himself once more before Suki slapped them away.

"Stop that!" the Kyoshi warrior ordered him. "That's not what I meant. It's just... what exactly were you trying to show?"

A dim glow of recognition came to Zuko's eyes before Sokka could speak. "I think... I kind of get it," he said haltingly. "I saw Katara doing something like that once. What is it though, exactly?"

"Bloodbending," Sokka intoned in a grave voice. Then he snapped back to normal and shook his head. "And let's just say I'm not eager to relive... wait. Did you just say you'd seen Katara doing that?"

The Fire Lord remembered the sound of the ocean slapping against the metal hull, the snap and curl of the sea raven flag. He closed his eyes briefly and tried to shake the image from his head, of the man's wide-eyed fear as he was jerkily brought to the floor. "The Southern Raiders," he explained simply.

Sokka paused. "Oh."

Suki looked at the suddenly subdued pair and bit her lip. "Right then," she said uncomfortably, glancing at the calendar. "If we want to avoid the full moon, we'd better leave tomorrow at the latest. It's only a week and a half away."

Sokka blinked and gathered himself again. "Right then," he nodded, his voice tinged with irony. "And after that, all we have to do is convince Arnook the war's over and help quell an entire city full of vengeful water tribe. Sounds like fun."

Zuko didn't even wince, his gaze as steady as his trust. "Thank you," he said simply, and the three teenagers shared a brief moment of solidarity before Sokka and Suki rose and departed.

* * *

The Dragon of the West was not a fan of small, enclosed areas. Iroh fidgeted uncomfortably behind the throne room wall, wishing he'd thought to bring a Pai Sho tile to quiet his fingers with. It was becoming difficult to maintain focused, and since that was the entire point of the exercise, he was wondering whether he should begin to despair. Of course, perhaps it wasn't entirely the fault of the spy-hole chamber. Iroh sighed, and raised his third cup of tea to his lips.

"Oh do quit worrying, Iroh!" Bumi shifted next to him, eagerly peering out the thin line of holes that served as their window. "Aang will be fine. He's got the stuff in him!"

Iroh paused, settling his cup back down and folding his arms into his sleeves. "I believe he does too," he nodded. "But still, he and Miss Toph are only twelve. And while I have full faith in their abilities, it seems a bit much to just leave them to the court and the nobles over five times their age without any other guidance."

"Then why don't you stay? Wait!" Bumi held up a hand before Iroh could reply. "Look who's coming now! Grrr... I don't like him. And his fashion sense is terrible."

Curious, Iroh craned his neck to see the next supplicant, and was somewhat surprised when the eye holes revealed a middle-aged man stylishly clad in the traditional garments of Earth Kingdom nobility. Iroh raised an eyebrow. "Indeed."

"Shh!" Bumi ordered, flapping his hands. Iroh quietened and settled his attention on the scene. Despite his worry, he smiled as he focused on the two twelve year olds in front of them, his grin widening as Toph looked down imperiously from the dais.

"And what do _you_ want?" she asked loftily, folding her right leg primly over her left in a manner completely at odds with her question. Beside her, the Avatar groaned and slapped his forehead. A red mark was quickly beginning to develop there, and Iroh had little doubt that Aang would wake up with a headache tomorrow.

"Great Avatar, and honoured Miss Bei-Fong," the man lowered his head perfunctorily. Then he straightened, and Iroh pursed his lips at the ire he saw flashing there. "I demand that you remove those disgusting Fire Nation soldiers from my house at once!"

Aang's smooth brow furrowed. "Where exactly is your house, Mr... uh..."

"Hao. And it's the third on the left from the entrance to the upper tiers, where..."

"Hang on a sec," Toph pointed accusingly at his face. "You came to see us about this yesterday! I knew I'd heard your voice before!"

Iroh watched with interest as Aang suddenly straightened in his seat. "Good catch, Toph," he said, his gaze turning stern. "Well then, Mr. Hao. Has the situation changed in the last twenty-four hours?"

The man squirmed, and Bumi had to clap his hand over his mouth to keep from snorting in delight. His discovery seemed to have sucked the nerve out of him. "Well, not really, but..."

"Then stop wasting our time!" Toph slammed her foot down. "Zuko's soldiers are helping to _rebuild_ your house right now, you idiot. How many times do we have to tell you that?"

Hao flushed. "I beg your pardon, Miss Bei-Fong," he started off frostily, but then at the warning glint in her eyes he softened to condescension. "I know it must be hard for you to understand since Gaoling was not touched by the war. But I am simply asking that the effort be undertaken by good, reliable earthbenders instead of... trash."

Toph's nostrils flared before Aang could intervene. "No, I think that _you_ don't understand. Ba Sing Se is massive. There simply aren't enough 'good reliable earthbenders' for them to do it by themselves. The war is over now. The Fire Nation soldiers are here to help, so if you're going to get off by calling them _trash_, I suggest you resign yourself to your house remaining unliveable for the next three months!"

From behind the wall, Iroh smothered a chuckle with his palm. Next to him, Bumi was shaking gleefully. "That's the Blind Bandit for you!" he crowed. "Oh Iroh, she's making mincemeat of them!"

Iroh bit back another laugh, nodded in agreement, and refocused on the scene. Hao was now nearly puce with anger, but his stiffness showed that he at least retained enough of a grip to realise that facing down the tiny earthbending master in front of him was hopeless. The General watched with interest as the same thought seemed to cross the Avatar's mind. From the corner of his eyes, Aang glanced at Toph questioningly. And although she couldn't have visually registered it, her bare toes shifted across the stone at her feet and she gave him an imperceptible nod. He caught it and set his shoulders, just in time to meet Hao's pleading gaze as the man turned from Toph's unyielding scowl to the seemingly more malleable Avatar.

"These are difficult times for readjustment for us all, Mr Hao," Aang said neutrally. "I know that it is hard to see people who used to be enemies as friends, but that's what has to happen if we want peace. Unless Zuko's soldiers are acting wrongly, you have no grounds for protest... except if you want your house to remain unfixed."

There was a pause as the Earth Kingdom noble visibly stared. Aang met his eyes almost serenely. "That will be all, thank you, Mr Hao," he said.

The man visibly deflated before walking slowly back the way he came. Iroh didn't bother to suppress a smile as he made a mental note of the occasion and filed it away with the others. He had to admit, despite his doubts, so far the two were doing surprisingly well. Where a firm hand was needed, Toph seemed to instinctively step up to the fore, and it was almost as if her presence hardened the Avatar's backbone as well. And yet when a more delicate touch had been needed, Aang had intuitively sensed it as well, and his gentler approach had rubbed off a little on the earthbender. It was heartening to see.

As soon as Hao was out of sight, though, Aang slumped back. "Did I do good?" he asked hopefully, turning to Toph.

The girl smiled and punched his arm. "You're getting there, Twinkletoes. And yeah, I think we did good. Hao should spread the word around his highborn friends, so hopefully we won't be getting any more arrogant nobles complaining about the joint rebuilding. Then we can move on to some real problems!"

Aang sighed and cradled his head in his hands briefly, before sitting up again. "Real problems. Yay."

From behind the wall, Iroh sipped his tea thoughtfully. "They work well together," he observed out loud to his companion, watching as Toph called out imperiously for the next person to come in. "Better than I would have thought, actually. Then again, their approaches do balance each other out quite well."

"Ah, Iroh. You and your balance," Bumi grinned. "Still, you're right. The old two-two with young Toph is just what Aang needs to keep his head straight with these people."

"Perhaps, but maybe an extra hand is needed too," Iroh lowered himself back into his chair as he mused. "And now I am torn between where I am required more. Zuko will have his other friends to help him too... I believe Miss Katara's steady head and open heart will definitely help him there. Not to mention that young Sokka has proven himself highly capable."

"What about that other boy you mentioned?" Bumi asked. "That Shen Li fellow?"

"Him?" Iroh's teacup paused halfway to his lips. "Ah, yes. He is more of a gamble, I admit, but I have faith in him too. He and Zuko are more alike than they know. Hopefully they will find a trusted friend in each other now that the war is over, instead of the enemies they would likely have been."

He frowned and turned the china in his hand, noting how delicate it was, the chip at the corner, how easily it would shatter with one misplaced finger. "Still, it remains a gamble, and it is one of the reasons I'd hoped to return. Zuko will need my aid if my instincts have failed."

Bumi paused, turning away from the peep holes to swipe a piece of lettuce from a bowl to his side. "Your nephew's grown a lot since the last time I saw him," the King of Omashu commented, munching noisily. "I think he'll do just fine for a while without you. You've taught him well, after all."

Iroh smiled. "Thank-you, King Bumi. As always, your opinion is greatly valued and..."

Suddenly, he frowned again. "Wait, you've never actually _seen_ Zuko before last week, have you?"

Bumi shrugged, and reached for another piece of lettuce. Iroh stared at him for a moment, and then sighed. Carefully, he sipped his tea once more and wondered how his nephew was doing, only half-listening to the next person presenting himself before the Avatar and his earthbending master.

"Greetings, great Avatar and honourable Master Bei-Fong." The man swept himself into a low bow, and then straightened with the grace of experience and calculating precision. "My name is Feng, and these are my earthbending soldiers. What can we do to serve you?"

* * *

"So... nice day today, isn't it?"

Mai didn't even glance at him, her face studiously blank and facing forwards. "Absolutely stunning," she replied dryly.

They had been riding for a few hours now, the afternoon sun trickling sweat down their skin and trapping heat in their hair. Above them, the sky stretched out as blue as the ocean, with nary a cloud in sight. Combined with the smooth jolting of the basilisk beneath her, Mai was reminded eerily of another time, in another land, when there had been two girls beside her instead of one man, and the quarry had been the Avatar.

Mai hunched over her mount and decided she didn't particularly like that memory. Then again, she was beginning to wonder whether she liked any of those memories. Thinking of Azula made her think of her brother, which made her think of the confirmation that had spilled from Zuko's lips only a few hours ago. And although the hurt had eased, it was still a painful reminder of what had occurred..

_Left behind, nothing special_, Azula had said. First at the Academy, then after Zuko's first betrayal, when the princess had pretended to think her friend hadn't been listening. Mai's heart clenched.

"So... how are you faring?"

This time, his voice was almost a welcome diversion, and Mai shook her head in grudging admiration. He really didn't give up, she noted with a measure of relief and bored amusement. Still, that didn't mean that she had to entertain him either. "I'm fine," she replied curtly, riding on without meeting his gaze. She heard him exhale once, and then turned her attention back to their surroundings.

For a while, there was no other sound but the rustle of their mounts' claws as they dug into the dry grass beneath them. Mai squinted against the sun to see the plains rolling ahead. Every so often, the landscape was broken by a sprawl of wildflowers or a hardy bush. But for the most part, it was just grass and dirt, and Mai couldn't help but sigh.

How boring.

Beside her, she heard her companion shift in his saddle. Aside from his carefully ventured questions, he too had been silent for most of the way. Mai pursed her lips. Perhaps the next time he tried to start a conversation, she might play along. Even if his questions were inane...

As if on cue, she heard him clear his throat. "So... why did you call me 'the boy with the wires'?"

Mai jerked upright in surprise, and then flushed when her eyes turned and found his sly grin. Annoyance began to stir in her stomach as she realised that he'd been playing her the entire time, when she thought that she'd been the one playing him. Still, Mai was nothing if not resilient. Springing back, she raised her eyebrow. "It seemed natural enough," she said, her voice flat as if her heart wasn't racing in remembrance. "The first time I saw you was at an Academy presentation when you were showing off."

The barb elicited nothing but a pleased grin. "You enjoyed that, then?" he asked lightly, as if it didn't matter to him whether she had.

Mai paused, recalling the soaring sense of freedom which had shaken her to her fingertips, the image of the fluttering paper against the sky. "It was interesting," she finally said, as if it were anything but. "I've never seen a weapon like that before."

Shen Li seemed to consider that as he balanced leisurely in his saddle. Then he smiled, and this time there was nothing hidden or mask-like in it. "Would you like to have a better look?"

Mai hesitated, and then silently nudged her mount closer to his until their legs were nearly brushing across the divide. Shen Li bent towards her at the same time, pulling his sleeves up over his wrists. Her eyes widened fractionally at the sight the movement revealed.

Beneath his clothing, Shen Li's wrists were encircled by two thick leather bands. Each one glinted in the sunlight, a multitude of wire coils attached in varying ways and with varying distances to its surface. Mai's gaze skimmed over them with interest, picking out the differences and detail. The band on his left was slightly more bulky, with only three wires fastened to its sides. One of them ended in an impressively intricate but small grappling hook, which lay pressed flat against his skin. Another hook was tucked under his right band, but it was almost swallowed up by the other wires that were also looped there. Small catches decorated the leather, some with springs for quick release, others whose function she could only guess at.

"I've never seen anything like them before," Mai admitted again.

Shen Li chuckled. "I'd be surprised if you had," he responded, folding his sleeves back down again until his hands lay innocuously on the saddle edge. "While the wires are a rare weapon in themselves, I took the liberty while I was at the Academy to make a few changes to the designs."

He paused, and then smiled at the rolling plains before them, the sun bright against his pale features. "Actually, you're the first person I've really shown them to."

Mai blinked, half of her wondering at his words, the other noting that he seemed to smile for real much easier now that the capitol was far behind them. "Oh?" she asked, pulling back from him.

He didn't seem to notice. "It's just a common sense thing, really. The more people I show my wires to, the more people will know what tricks I have underneath my sleeves and the greater my disadvantage in a fight."

"Why show them to me, then?" she asked suspiciously.

He shrugged, never looking at her as his gaze roved ahead. "Well, I trust that we'll never be meeting on opposite sides of a battlefield. And I also trust that you won't go around blurting out my weaknesses to everyone else."

_To blurt out your weaknesses, I need to know them first. _"And how should I know whether I should trust _you_?" she demanded suddenly. "I barely know you. And by the sounds of it, Zuko barely knows you. Yet now you're his Chief Bodyguard."

For the first time since they'd started out, Shen Li's carefree exterior cracked a little. He said nothing for a while, a faint crease on his forehead as he thought. Finally, he sighed. "A little bit of faith goes a long way, you know."

Mai's eyes narrowed. "This isn't a game," she said.

His gaze met her own. "Isn't it?" he responded calmly.

There was something mesmerising, something unidentifiable and disturbing in his gaze. Mai swallowed dryly. Somehow, she was sure that he was suddenly talking about far more than just Fire Nation politics. His voice was opaque, almost a challenge, and she had to resist the urge to retreat even as she scrambled to figure out what was going on. "Not when it comes to Fire Lord," she countered sharply. "Not when it comes to Zuko."

For a moment, an indescribable look flickered across his face, and then it was gone. Shen Li turned back to the ground ahead of them, his eyes searching for their next landmark. When she finally thought that he'd forgotten to answer, he wet his lips and his mouth moved.

"It never is," he said softly, but before she could challenge him, he suddenly stopped abruptly and held up his hand. Automatically, Mai brought her own basilisk to a grinding halt, her eyes cutting across air to meet the sight that had stopped them. And then they widened.

Before them lay the Western road, but the road itself was only visible in patches between the heavy tread of the scores of travellers on its back. They seemed to stretch out along the path like a scaled dragon, all trundling tiredly in the same eastern direction. Some moved with their livestock dragging wagons piled high with their belongings; others with bundles and packs; and still more clung to nothing but each other, the blank look on their faces speaking more than words ever could. Above them all, the sun glared down mercilessly, and Mai could hear the occasional squalls of babies and the hushes of mothers as the line of humanity kept moving.

She stared. "Where are they all going?" she demanded raspily.

Shen Li frowned and shaded his eyes for a better look. "To the capitol, I think. These must be the refugees the boys were talking about."

Mai didn't reply, her mind stretching at the misery before her. Outside, the remnants of her normal aloofness kept her calm, but on the inside it was another question. Even if Mai had not spent two weeks in prison, had not had the flame of hurt and feeling rekindled by Zuko's betrayal, she would have been hard pressed not to feel anything at the sight of the refugees. Each step was a tragedy, each body a story of weariness, confusion and despair. Her pulse thrummed beneath her skin, and she didn't notice when she gripped the front of her saddle tightly.

"What do we do?" she found herself asking.

He paused. Then... "What we set out to do," he said, his voice heavy with regret. "The sooner we found out who's destroying these peoples' villages and what they want, the quicker they will be able to return home."

His words jerked her back into business. Mai set her shoulders and recomposed herself, annoyed that she had slipped. "Right," she said flatly, and then drove her heels into the basilisk's flanks. "Let's get on with it, then."

They travelled in silence for the next few hours, the time measured only by the beat of the basilisks' claws and the gradual shadowing of the day. Soon the plain was behind them and they moved into thick forest, the dirt path below them well-trodden and damp. Mai shivered slightly in the growing cold, tasting the river rushing unseen to their left. As the sun finally dipped below the horizon, they slowed their pace to a graceful crawl, the embedded roots in the road too treacherous for any rush.

As if the decreased pace was a signal to begin talking again, Shen Li spoke. "Why did you come?" he asked, a genuine note of curiosity in his voice. For some reason, the words sounded as if they had been on the tip of his tongue all day. "You certainly didn't have to."

Mai brushed a lock of hair back with her gloved hands. "Anything to get out of the house," she half-lied, leaving it at that.

But of course, she'd already learnt that he wasn't so easily dissuaded. "You mean you'd rather risk my company?" he queried, a hint of a smile at the corner of his lips.

Mai chose not to tread on treacherous ground, and her eagerness to avoid the question made her say more than she normally would. "Ever since Omashu, my father's been trying to win his way back into the political circles," she commented dryly. "I had to sit through so many boring dinners the last time I was home." _When I was still following Azula blindly. When I was still Zuko's girlfriend. _"I just thought I might pre-empt the issue this time around."

Shen Li nodded sympathetically. "It sounds like a wise decision. I've had to sit through more than my share of business dinners myself."

A vague memory swum into Mai's mind at that, of a hawkish man with a royal bearing. "Your father's the Minister for Security, right?"

He halted for a moment, and she glanced up quickly at the movement. Although it was dark, the shadows could not hide his suddenly stiffened posture. "Yes," he said shortly, as if that were all he wanted to say on the matter.

Mai paused reflectively, her sharp eyes fastened on his form in the twilight. "Actually, I think I've met your father before," she remarked, watching him for any more twitches. "He might have come over to dinner once or twice with my family."

Shen Li shrugged, giving nothing away. "I wouldn't be surprised," he said neutrally, and then he turned to her with a wry smile on his face. Unbidden, the thought flashed into her mind that she missed the openness and warmth of his other smiles. "Both of our fathers are quire avid enthusiasts of the political game, aren't they?"

She irritably shook the thought away. "That's certainly one way of putting it," Mai said dryly, and she was struck when he chuckled in agreement. The moonlight shafting through the trees gave his pale skin an almost unearthly glow, lighting up the sharp cut of his cheekbones and the youthful yet aged look in his eyes. She suddenly realised the mirror they made; two children who had grown up in households full of masks and expectations, and she wondered at how he still managed to smile.

She was about to comment on it when he suddenly halted abruptly, pulling the basilisk up short with a jerk. The beast hissed uneasily, whipping its tail as he frowned. "Wait, what's that sound?"

Mai heard it an instant later, her senses jolting back from him to her surroundings. It was only a very soft rumble, like distant thunder or the scrape of rock against rock. But then recognition struck, and with a knowledge born from her time in the Earth Kingdom, Mai's eyes uncharacteristically widened.

"Below us!" she shouted hoarsely, clutching the reins of her agitated mount. "We've got to get off the ground!"

He didn't stop to ask her what she meant. Shen Li leapt to his feet, balancing with an eerie grace on the shifting saddle. His eyes flashed across each side, and then reached sky-high. "Grab my hand!"

She scrambled upwards. "What?" she demanded, but then her wrist was pulled around his neck and she felt the rest of her body follow only a second later. With a force that pressed the air from her lungs with a whoosh, he yanked her flush against his chest, his left hand extended to the air and his right curled firmly around her waist. And then the world became a blur as he jumped.

They seemed to fall in slow motion for a moment, their feet dangling through air as the now terrified basilisks uttered reptilian screams. And then Mai felt a rough jerk, and their bodies were flying up to meet the branches overhead. A cold rush of air brushed past her ears as they were pulled up, and as they drew closer to the trees, she saw a dull glint buried deeply in the bark of the trunk. Belatedly, she recognised it as the grappling hook she'd seen pressed against Shen Li's wristband earlier, but then there was no more time to think. The enigma that was the former guard captain swung them safely onto a bough at least twenty feet from the ground, just as the earth finally split open with an awful crack and their mounts and supplies were pulled under.

As suddenly as it had come, the rumbling stopped. For a few crystal clear moments, the only sound Mai could hear was Shen Li's harsh breathing. Then his muscles tensed beneath her, readying to move, and she realised simultaneously that firstly, his arm was still wrapped around her, and secondly, that they couldn't have fit a breath of air in the space between them.

"Wait!" she hissed, tugging on his sleeve, and he halted. Quickly, she pulled herself free from him and clung to the branch with her slender hands, peering down to the ground below them. A few seconds passed as she scanned the seemingly innocuous dirt, and then a dreadful suspicion began to stir in her stomach. "It's not over yet."

He didn't have time to respond. Just as she spoke, the earth burst upwards again, and five new shadows clambered into the air. Mai's left hand automatically reached to her tunic, the other steadying her balance on the bough. Beside her, still crouched low on the branch, Shen Li shifted noiselessly in the bark and met her eyes.

_Stay here. Stay silent. _They commanded each other simultaneously, and despite the gravity of the situation, Mai couldn't help but roll her eyes at the unexpected duality. Then their attention shifted back to the figures who had begun to circle the path around them, clearly searching for 's heart thudded in her throat. How long would they look for them? They couldn't stay in the trees forever. She began to work out the first of her senbon, thanking Agni for the rush of the nearby river. It drowned out any rustle she might have made as she withdrew first one, then two, and then three more needles from her clothing. Their weight felt comfortable in her fingers, and she concentrated on the sleekness of the steel against her skin. Even if they weren't planning to use them, their presence was still reassuring.

Beside her, she could tell that Shen Li was having similar thoughts. Carefully, with one hand still firmly gripping the branch below him, he began to work out the grappling hook from the trunk. Mai stayed motionless, her eyes fastened on the people below. Only now did she realise how bare their hiding place was, how little the sparse leaves on the lower boughs did to shield them from any unfriendly gaze. Suddenly it didn't seem so stupid to have brought out her knives, and she felt her heart rate decrease when Shen Li finally pulled the hook free from the bark. Now they were ready to fight. Although she couldn't help but hope that they would be too stupid to...

"There they are! Up there, in the trees!"

... fat chance.

Mai sighed, and then leapt, plunging her dullest knife into the trunk to slow her fall. Rock thudded into the wood above her, but her graceful descent ended in a roll that brought her to safety one foot from its reach. She was up and running by the time the next volley had been summoned, her knives arcing through the air one by one to meet with hasty shields of stone.

There was a thud, and then Shen Li was beside her, his wires twisting out to lash at a figure to their left. But before they had even reached their target, a block of stone had smashed through their trajectory and into his path. Cursing, he stumbled backwards behind a tree. Mai joined him a few seconds later, her face pale with irritation.

"We have to keep behind cover," she muttered.

He didn't pause. "And lash out when they're off balance," he finished grimly. "Let's go."

They leapt out from opposite sides, two dancing targets in the moonlight as they dodged and weaved and waited. Mai let her daggers fly the instant she saw an opening, and they pinned a man's body to a trunk. As he struggled to earthbend with his legs, she quickly spun around with her elbow and knocked him out. _One down. _Parallel to them, Shen Li moved underneath another's guard and tangled his legs, bringing him crashing to the ground and into the line of the guard captain's debilitating kick. _Two. _But then they were forced to retreat as two more stones whistled past their heads, too close for comfort and too indicative of their disadvantage in their present environment. Ducking backwards, they were slowly pushed past the protective layers of trees, until Mai took a step behind her and realised they were suddenly out in the open.

Her knuckles whitened. The clearing they had stepped into ended in a cliff-top only twelve feet behind them, the sheer rock cutting away at least twenty meters before ending in the white foam of the river. Briefly, she wondered whether that had been their adversaries' plan all along. Her lips curled. No matter, that just meant they would have to end it quickly.

And so when the stone burst from the cover of the trees, she was ready. Dodging underneath its whistling blow, she leapt for the man's throat. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Shen Li crouched low, his fingers spread out just before he pounced on another. They clashed almost in time, like some violent waltz as fists met cuffs and knives slashed through material. With the lack of anything to pin the earthbender to, Mai dodged underneath his meaty fist and delivered a flying backhand of her own with her gloved fingers. He staggered back, leaving enough space for her to coil and then spring, her foot aimed unerringly for his head. There was a dull thud, and then he crumpled to the ground.

Mai straightened, just as the other earthbender flew past her and crashed into a tree. She followed his arc with impassive curiosity, and then let her gaze wander back along his trajectory to the smirking guard captain. And just because she could, she rolled her eyes.

For a blessed few moments, there was stillness. The two warriors tensed, their ears alert for the slightest sound. The rushing of the river below them was loud now, and it was hard to tell whether there was anyone else left. But when nothing else moved to attack them, they slowly relaxed.

"Well," Shen Li panted. "That was exciting."

Mai rolled her eyes again, readying herself to deliver a cutting reply. But then a shape rose up in the shadows behind Shen Li's shoulder, and she froze. With a start, Mai remembered that there had been five figures, and she opened her mouth to shout a warning just as the ground bucked beneath her.

Hearing the earth groan, Shen Li spun around and lashed out with his right arm. The wire nearly shrieked as it split the air, wrapping around the earthbender's hand and jerking him to the ground. But it was too late. When he turned back, he saw Mai stagger, saw the stone complete its shift and then toss her off the cliffside.

The guard captain's strangled cry rung deaf in his own ears. Shen Li raced to the side just in time to watch Mai fall, the air twisting her slim body towards the violently rushing river. The last thing he saw were her wide, amber eyes...

And then she was gone.

* * *

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A/N II - Just a note here before the next chapter. I've been taking the time recently now that uni is over for the first year to really plot my way through where I want to go with this story. And I've discovered that I've still got quite a way to go.

This makes me wonder. While I'm more determined than ever to finish this, I'm also curious as to how many people are actually reading this. The new stats system is a trifle confusing, and so aside from my faithful, much appreciated group of reviewers, I'm not sure if everyone else is enjoying this. More specifically, I'm not sure what parts you're enjoying, what's making you keep reading, etc.... all things I need to know to keep improving and keep making the story better until its end. So although I'm definitely going to finish this story for myself, I would really, really appreciate it if you would drop me a line from time to time to let me know how I'm going. Thanks!

-Shadowhawke


	16. Against the Sun

**Chapter 16: Against the Sun**

Disclaimer: Not mine already, don't sue. :)

A/N I - First of all, just a tiny note I need to get out of the way: I know that Shen Li isn't technically a guard captain anymore, but for some reason that title rolls a lot easier on the keyboard than Chief Bodyguard. So I hope no-one minds if I keep using it.

And secondly, and far more importantly, thank you so much to everyone who reviewed last chapter. It was absolutely inspiring seeing valued, familiar faces alongside some new ones, and also very helpful to get more feedback. I'm sorry I haven't responded yet to anyone; I've actually been away in Tasmania without any internet access for the last week. But rest assured that I'll be taking the time to write to each of you personally. Thank you again. This chapter is for you.

* * *

_Don't look._

_Things are weak if you've only heard them. _

_Don't look,_

_Because truth bears a burden._

_Don't look,_

_You'll burn your eyes 'gainst the golden sun._

_Don't look,_

_Because something's begun._

_

* * *

_His first thought was to leap after her, but then the non-suicidal and more rational side of him took over. Carefully, Shen Li pushed aside his roiling emotions, slipped into his military training, and turned away from the cliff-side to assess his situation. The five earthbenders were still down for the count, but there was no way of telling how long they would remain incapacitated for. He would have to decide, and decide quickly.

It took only a moment for the rather satisfying image of slapping one awake (preferably the last one) and then ruthlessly questioning him to arise in his mind. For a second, Shen Li held it sweetly in contemplation and then reluctantly pushed it away. Although he was certain these earthbenders could provide the two pieces of information he needed, there was the problem of him being outnumbered, mostly unequipped, and on foot. Any time taken out for a useful interrogation would likely be quickly used against him, and as much as he wanted to wreak some vengeance, to taste some blood, he couldn't now unless he wanted the tables to turn.

Shen Li resisted the urge to swear. Here he was in the perfect position to complete the first part of his mission, but with no way of putting the information to use or of surviving the process. To say it was frustrating was an understatement. Cold anger reared its head as he surveyed the fallen earthbenders, but then even that vanished away to be replaced by a stab of pain. The earthbenders. The earth. Mai...

He took a few steps back to the cliff-side to clear his head, gazing down at the water with almost desperate eyes. It was a considerable fall, and the foam below suggested the treachery of jagged rocks. Despite himself, his heart rate quickened, a slow feeling of dread beginning to overwhelm him. Even if she had survived the fall itself, which was looking more unlikely by the moment, she would have been cut to pieces by the stone knives beneath the rapids. He shut his eyes tight against the picture of the pounding water, refusing to contemplate that there was a possibility, and eventuality, a likelihood...

... and then a quick image of her leapt into his mind; sharply sardonic, cutting, and as strong as her blades. Shen Li took a deep breath and stepped back, oddly comforted. She was alive, he told himself grimly. She had to be. And so all he had to do was find her.

His mind set, the guard captain turned back clinically to the three earthbenders in the clearing and began checking them. Running his hands impersonally over pockets and pouches, he felt a slight pang of disappointment when he turned up nothing but a few packets of army rations. Attaching them to his own belt, he walked back into the forest to search the last two.

This time, he was met with a little more success. The man who Mai had pinned to the tree with her senbon had a roughly sketched map in his pocket. Holding it up to the moonlight, Shen Li quickly scanned it. The haste with which it had been drawn alerted his suspicions first, and by the time he managed to match it with the landmarks he knew, he was sure that the map only detailed a succession of temporary camps for the earthbender scouts as opposed to the base stronghold of the rebel army itself.

Still... the scouts would have to return somewhere for the night, and if they weren't fools they would bring along the basilisks. An idea alighted in his mind, and Shen Li quickly pinpointed their next camp and memorised it, before crouching down beside the felled man and carefully tucking the map back where he found it.

Straightening, the guard captain surveyed the surroundings. There was nothing left to do here, as much as he would have loved to beat them into consciousness and demand answers. With a controlled sigh, he readied his wires to propel him into the trees, but then a glint at the corner of his eye stopped him.

He turned. Mai's senbon glittered, the thin shaft of moonlight highlighting the sleekness of its strength. On impulse, Shen Li suddenly reached forwards and worked the needle free. It fell into his hand like it belonged, and its weight was enough for him to pull the others out as well. The earthbender slumped to the ground with a muffled thump, but Shen Li paid no attention as he carefully secreted the deadly treasures in his tunic. And then, smoothing the fabric once again to assure himself of their existence, Shen Li reached up once more towards the sky.

* * *

Colours.

They were the first things she saw - muted navys, swirling blues and ethereal whites that floated like eiderdown around her vision as she opened her eyes. And then they turned into dirty, throbbing greys, and Mai gasped and fell back into unconsciousness.

* * *

The second time Mai awoke, hot afternoon sun burned into her skin. Slowly, she clawed her way up into the land of the living. She regretted it almost instantly when the pain hit her like a wave of fire, jerking her up with an agonised hiss.

"Shh..." someone whispered. She felt a gentle but insistent hand on her abdomen, pushing her down again. "You're all right. Just stay still."

Bile boiled up in her throat. Instinctively, Mai tried to struggle against it, against the healing fingers holding her down, but then her own body rebelled against her. She had a moment to catch her breath, and then her lungs heaved. Coughing and hacking, Mai spat the last remnants of river water out of her chest. When she was done, she collapsed back, exhausted. Pain knifed across her ribs, her back, her head... the noblewoman couldn't figure out a place where it _didn't_ hurt. It was as if blinding shards of glass were scraping inside her skin, turning her inside out. She squeezed her eyes shut and breathed against the pain, trying to bring everything under control.

The voice stirred over her again, and she realised it had been speaking to her even while she'd been fighting for air. "It's going to be all right. It's going to be all right now. That was the last of it. Shh..."

Irately, the part of her that wasn't concentrating on dealing with the pain reared. How did _she_ know it was going to be okay? Had _she_ just been drowned? Had _she_ passed out who-knew-when with the thought that it was all over? To be honest, if it hadn't been for the fact that agony was searing itself into every known inch of her body, Mai would have doubted that she was still alive.

As it was, only life could be this much pain.

"It's okay now, it's okay..."

Strangely enough, the words seemed vaguely lulling in her dazed state now, as she battled to keep the pain from devouring her consciousness whole. Mai concentrated on the sound, on the soothing timbre of it and the smooth trickling of the water behind it. The river was calmer now, she thought hazily. Less angry. Less sharp. Less pain-filled...

It was at that moment that she realised the river that had tossed her bodily from rock to rock like a helpless rag doll wasn't the only thing that had changed. She felt a soft glow suffusing her chest, where the pain had concentrated like some living heartbeat of hurt. With a gasp of surprise, Mai's eyes shot open and she tried to push herself upwards. The calming voice broke off in a cry of alarm and warning, and Mai had just enough time to see the blurred form of two wide blue eyes before her body collapsed beneath her wounds and she blacked out again.

* * *

The third time, Mai thought groggily, really was the charm. This time she kept her eyes shut against the darkness, swimming slowly back to consciousness as she fought to clear her mind. It was hard work beating back the choking fog, and so she tried to concentrate on taking a mental inventory of her body. As her awareness grew, she sent it down each of her limbs, testing each digit and muscle gingerly as she went. Everything still hurt, but it was lessened now. There were dull throbs where there had been sharp, sticky pain, and in some areas the hurt had even died down to a low ache. Vaguely reassured underneath her suspicion, Mai decided to take a chance and slowly creak one eye open.

This time, the blessed comfort of night brushed against her eyelashes. Mai sighed in relief and tried to get up. Surprisingly, this time she managed to struggled all the way up to her elbows before cool hands were supporting her, and the voice had returned.

"Careful now. That's it. Sit up slowly. You're probably going to feel a bit dizzy and maybe even..."

Mai felt her stomach revolt, and before she knew it she was keeling over and retching weakly at her side. The hands moved firmly down to support her shoulders and back, one of them smoothing her hair away and holding her steady. Natural tears squeezed up long dried ducts, expelling the last of the dust and grit as she vomited up mud and river dregs. When it was over, she fell back drained, but oddly cleansed, and the angle at which her head tilted confirmed all of her earlier suspicions.

She wet her lips with a dry tongue. "Water..." she croaked.

Instantly it was brought to her mouth, cool and refreshing, and she washed the bile and old blood out with a grimace. On the second sip, she swallowed, and the movement brought a cold wave of life across her body that jolted her back into the land of the mostly functioning. Instantly, she felt the fog thin from her mind and her lessened pain visit her again, scrabbling at the corners of her mind with broken nails as she tried to focus on her saviour.

"You," she said.

What was her name again? She'd forgotten. She'd never really cared, after all, but for some reason it now seemed very important. Mai tried desperately to search the shreds of her mind that were functioning properly, but when they turned up blank she gave up. Leaning heavily against the tree at her back, she instead returned her attention to the other girl, trying to read an answer from her face.

It was surprisingly easy. The waterbender sat back on her heels and regarded her guardedly, as if unsure how to respond to such a loaded question. Mai watched as emotions flitted freely across her browned face, as smooth and natural as quicksilver. She was still watching in captivated fascination when the girl seemed to settle on some kind of resolution, and a ghost of a smile turned her lips.

"Mai, isn't it?"

In the dizziness of her shock, Mai didn't even bother to nod. "And you?" she rasped.

The waterbender touched a light hand to her breastbone. "Katara."

The name hung in the air for a moment, and then slowly faded away in the silence. It was to be the last word spoken for a while; slowly, the two girls took the time to study one another, the first sleek with water and the other sharp as steel. They had met across enough battlefields in the past to know each other as a shadow, a figure to be lashed out at the instant their silhouette fell into vision. But now the ground was different, and they both tried to find their footing in the evening light.

Finally, Katara bridged the gap, and somehow, Mai wasn't surprised. "I heard what you did at the Boiling Rock," she said, her voice warm even though her eyes were still wary. "Thank you."

It was funny, the way the waterbender's emotions spilled and danced across her face. For the first time ever, Mai saw them, really saw them, and in her still slightly-shocked state she wondered at their raw beauty. "I didn't do it for your brother," she felt obligated to explain. The words slid painfully from her still sore throat. "I didn't do it for you."

Surprisingly, the guarded gratefulness stayed on Katara's features, bringing out the blue of her eyes and the kindness of her smile. "I know, but it still saved him and my dad. And for that, I... I owe you."

Mai started. She hadn't ever thought of it that way before. She wasn't sure what to think, not when the waterbender girl was looking at her with open features free of fear and distrust. With something akin to... promise? Unreasonably, Mai felt a surge of panic begin to flutter in her chest. In her world, promises came with strings attached, and she just wasn't ready to leap back into that game with this former enemy she barely knew. "You don't owe me anything," she shot back harshly, rising up slightly with the vehemence of her words. The movement sent a dull lance of pain through her body and she fell back with a gasp. Instantly, Katara moved forwards to help, but Mai threw a hand up to ward her away. There was an uncomfortable silence as the noblewoman eased herself painstakingly back onto the support of the tree.

For a few moments, all she could hear was the song of the river and the rasp of her own breathing. Finally, Mai snorted bitterly, taking in her situation with an indefatigable sense of dry irony. "If anything, I owe you," she said flatly.

The words were out before she knew it, and Mai watched with a dull sense of horror as they reached the waterbender's ears. Something seemed to shift in her, changing the look on her face to thoughtfulness, and Mai was stunned at how easily she could let the feelings roll across her skin. "Not really," Katara said quietly, a wry smile now touching her lips. "If you want to think of it as a debt thing, I think I just repaid a favour."

Mai shook her head, and regretted it when it reintroduced a thumping headache she seemed to have forgotten. "There was no favour, I..."

Katara was there in a heartbeat, moving a thin swirl of water up to rest against her forehead. Mai froze, not entirely sure what was happening, but then her body relaxed in memory as a soft blue glow reached out to envelope her skin. Miraculously, the throbbing ache began to recede, and Mai closed her eyes in relief. Minutes must have passed like that, the waterbender crouched in front of her and a floating sensation surrounding her protectively like a shield. But of course, all good things had to end, and she felt a vague sense of disappointment when the water pulled away and reality returned in a rush.

"There, does that feel better?"

Mai looked up into clear blue eyes. "Yes," she said, not trusting herself to nod. Katara smiled in response and moved back, giving her space to breathe again and remember the words that had led to the pain.

_If anything, I owe you._ It had to be one of the strangest conversations she'd ever had, and she'd had a few with Ty Lee as one of her best friends. Mai felt the surrealism of it wash over her like a ghostly wave, and it shifted something inside her, a weight she'd never known existed. It was stupid to admit such a weakness, she thought to herself savagely. And yet the waterbender, Katara hadn't treated it like a weakness. The headache began to return as Mai grappled exhaustedly with the conundrum in front of her, her mind still dulled with shock and pain. It was almost a relief when Katara suddenly froze and the softness on her face vanished into business. At the change, Mai felt herself visibly relax.

There was danger. Physical, fightable danger. Even if she couldn't understand the reason behind it, Mai could understand its nature and that comforted her. Still, when Katara suddenly rose to her feet, agitated, Mai felt her head spin when she realised that the girl had been sitting ankle-deep in the shallows the entire time.

"_Again_," the girl muttered, somehow making it sound like a swearword. She glanced up quickly and met Mai's eyes. "I'm sorry, I have to go somewhere to fix things. But I'll be back."

Mai had no time to reply before the waterbender vanished from her range of vision. There was a rustle behind her, a few curses and the sound of slipping fabric. And then Katara returned, and Mai's eyes widened at the change.

"Stay here," the waterbender warned, her blue eyes shimmering behind the veil. "It's safe, and you shouldn't be moving around too much."

Mai said nothing, just nodded. She felt the other girl's gaze on her for a moment, feather-light and uncertain like a delicate flower. It lingered for a while, prickling against her skin uncomfortably, but then Katara sighed and turned away. And at that moment, Mai remembered the full unreality of her situation, and she shook her head slightly in wonder.

By all rights, she should be dead. But instead she was alive, a patient of a former enemy and now, it seemed, a ward of the Painted Lady. In the face of such strange miracles, Mai did the only thing she could think of doing.

Slowly, painstakingly, she lifted her shoulders up, nestled back down again in the crook of the tree, and got comfortable.

* * *

Navigating was surprisingly easy in the thickness of the canopy. Despite landmarks being difficult to gauge amidst the forest, the pools of moonlight at the top of the trees also made sighting them slightly easier. Shen Li ghosted from tree to tree in the shadows, soaring silently through the branches like a bird. After a while, the movement began to almost relax him. He'd cut his teeth escaping from the smooth, grip-less marble of the Academy's balconies, and so this wealth of secure holds and branches in the forest was mere child's play. Before long, he had arrived at his destination, and he swung his weight around sharply to alight on a large bough.

Catching his breath, the guard captain stilled and checked his memory and the area lit by starlight before him. Reassured that this was indeed the place he was seeking, Shen Li glanced briefly at his more immediate surroundings, determining the amount of cover, the scope of vision, and the angle of attack the perch offered him. Those three requirements satisfied, he eyed the branch critically for its degree of comfort, and then sighed. Carefully folding his legs beneath him, Shen Li unwound his wire in preparation and then settled down to wait.

Hours must have passed, hours that trickled past as slowly as minutes. As he grew bored of ruminating, Shen Li found himself reaching into the pocket of material over his heart and drawing out the senbon. Carefully, he held it up to the moonlight and examined it.

It was beautiful in its craftsmanship, its surface smooth, polished, and perfectly weighted for the throw. He turned it around in his fingers, appreciating its grace, its tapered point, its directness and reliability as a weapon. As it was, it probably wasn't surprising that the senbon summoned up an image of its owner in his mind.

Shen Li closed his eyes, and in the relative safety of his position and the lack of any immediate problem to address, he allowed the memories of her wash over him in all its pain and wonder. It was strange, how he felt so at ease around her when she constantly kept him on his toes. It would be wise to never let his guard down when she was around, he knew that. She was too sharp, too astute for him to remain hidden for long if he was not careful. But still, from the moment he'd walked into her cell, something had clicked. It was so easy to work with her, to trade barbs with her, to fight with her...

Shen Li shifted in his seat and pondered. He had never met anyone like her. Not at the Academy, not in his years as a never-promoted guard captain at the palace. Now that he was forced to consciously consider it, he couldn't quite put his finger on what exactly was going on. Still, there was no doubt in his mind when it came to her status. Mai was unquestionably, irrevocably, tantalisingly... special.

Shen Li breathed, and then curled his hand protectively around the blade. Whatever it took, he would find her.

* * *

Fong was a highly organised man. His armour was polished daily and he ordered a Dai Li agent up early every morning to transport him to ground level for firebending practice. Not only that, his meticulous timetables of when, where, and by whom the strategic village attacks would be executed were catalogued neatly on his desk. In fact, the habit was almost obsessive. Each fresh piece of news was met by going over the maps again, integrating every titbit of information into his impressive arsenal of knowledge. This meant that villages marked for destruction one day would be radically revised the next if there was evidence that his spies had confirmed enough willing additions to their ranks.

It also meant that when five war parties were half a day late in reporting back, he began to lose his cool very quickly.

"Are you certain you haven't seen anything?" he snapped.

The sentry shrugged helplessly. He was a relatively new recruit, otherwise he probably would have saluted out of fear. "They'll come when they come, sir. You askin' me about it every half hour certainly ain't gonna speed up the process."

He regretted the words as soon as he saw smoke start to curl up from the firebender's clenched fists. Fong drew himself up, his gaze narrowed and deadly as a puma-snake.

"Firstly, _private_, you are to address me as Sergeant Major, not sir. Secondly, you are never to speak in such an insolent tone unless you wish to be sent to the front lines of the next city assault."

His voice dropped low, almost honeyed and caressing in its promise of pain. "In fact, I've a mind to..."

Luckily, the sentry never had to find out what his punishment would be. From over the next hill rise, a piercing whistle sliced through Fong's words. Instantly, the sentry scrambled to attention. "Sir! I-I mean, Sergeant Major! That's them!

Immediately, Fong felt the apprehension seep from his muscles, to be replaced by the blissful feeling of irritation instead. With an almost serene look on his face, he began barking orders to everyone in sight. And when the first war party finally made it over the ridge, limping towards the entrance to their base camp, he was ready for them.

"Corporal Juan! I demand that you give me an answer for... sweet Agni, what happened?"

Juan instinctively straightened from where she was bowed underneath the weight of an injured soldier. At his pained yelp, however, she quickly lowered herself again. "Sergeant Major Fong," she addressed him through gritted teeth. "I must see to the needs of my men." Her derisive eyes flicked over to the man bringing up the flank of her group. "Let the peacock-bird tell you what has happened."

Fong was still so surprised he could only nod mutely. _This was not supposed to happen. We were not meant to meet any opposition! _Attempting to maintain as much control as he could, he turned officiously to the man Juan had indicated, quickly recognising him as one of their top spokespeople, but also one of the few men in the camp held almost universally in contempt.

Still, as long as he did his job... "Jin-su, would you like to let me know what happened?" he asked carefully, preparing himself for the histrionics.

The man stared at him torturously. "It was horrible," he gasped. "Absolutely horrible. I knew there was something wrong the instant we went into the village and I climbed up to give my speech."

Fong repressed the urge to roll his eyes, barely succeeding in his already impatient state. "Who attacked you, Jin-su? Why has Corporal Juan, who I know to be one of the most cautious soldiers loyal to the cause, returned late and with so many wounded?"

The rabble-rouser gave a despairing wail, and then launched himself forwards. Presented with the problem of facing only a wall of smooth armour, which was admittedly difficult to dramatically cling to, he reached up further and grasped the Sergeant Major's broad shoulders. "It was a Spirit! A horrible, ghostly spirit whose eyes burned like the sun on the sea and whose face was marked with blood!"

If it had been any other man, Fong would have thrown him off and burned his skin to the bone. But as annoying as Jin-su was, he was still their best recruiter. Even if some of the recruitment was forced. Besides, no one could incite fear and hatred and quell doubts like he could, and the army as a whole owed him a debt for his creation of their chant.

"_We will not back down for the Avatar's lackey! We will never bow to the traitor Prince!"_

Even if it was written by a fool, the strength of it still made his blood boil, and they now had the numbers to prove it. And so Fong merely unhooked the actor's fingers from his shoulder plates (resisting the temptation to break them as he went). "Tell me more."

Jin-su was only too happy to oblige. "We had just begun the burning. I was on top of the pile, addressing the villagers with my stirring words. And then the mist starting crawling around us."

Fong felt the oddest sense of his hair prickling. "Go on."

"We paid it no attention at the beginning, but then it coalesced above the village like a thick spell... Then before we knew it... there was a hiss! And the entire cloud of mist began swirling like some witch tending to her bubbling cauldron. Corporal Juan told her men to fan out and protect us, but the mist just flew over and attacked the burning houses!"

Fong held up a hand in disbelief. "Hold on, Jin-Su. The _mist_ attacked the _houses_? What next? It started attacking Juan and her men?" _Do you honestly expect me to believe this?_

Jin-su paused dramatically, and then uttered a single word. "Yes."

The sergeant-major shook his head. "Go on," he folded his arms across his chest.

"Once the flames were out, the smoke was so thick we could barely breathe. And then thick arms of water leapt from the river and began attacking with this mist! They seized the men in their tendrils and brought them down! Even the villagers were no longer listening to me."

The sentry, who was still standing surreptitiously off to the side, tried very hard not to snigger at Jin-su's suddenly put-off pout. But then the actor quickly recovered himself and plunged ahead with his tale.

"But that was only a prelude to the horror. An entire wave swept over two men and brought them down to the ground. And then it _frosted_. Before my very eyes, they were turned into struggling puppets encased in ice. Of course, I was still valiantly trying to carry on with my speech, but then the mist parted and _she_ arrived."

The actor leant closer, his widened eyes now only inches from Fong's own. The terror and heightened theatrics twisted his face into a visage that made the Sergeant Major's skin crawl. And then Jin-su's voice dropped to a breathy whisper, and the almost comedic effect became spine-tingling.

"I thought at first that she was a girl, but then she soon revealed she was a spirit. No-one, nothing else could have that power. She... she walked across the water, and ice spread where he feet touched. And then, when our soldiers began firing..."

He shuddered, and this time clutched Fong's neck collar. "She moved our _blood_, man. She reached inside and _pulled_. I saw a soldier dropping his weapon and joining his comrades on the ground, and then the mist just rolled over him and froze him to the spot as well. And then she looked at me, and my words shivered in my throat and stopped."

To the side, the sentry wondered whether he could employ whoever this person was. Just to shut Jin-su up.

"And she... she lifted her head and stared at me from under the veil. I couldn't see her clearly between the gauze and the mist, but my blood felt like it was running like ice. I knew not her name, but I knew then that she was a river spirit come to destroy us all. And then she reached inside and my limbs were moving, they were pulling me to the ground and rendering me helpless! My own arms and legs, disobeying me!"

Fong was now beginning to feel decidedly unsettled.

"But before I fell, I saw the brave Juan leap into the mist. The spirit turned to her and moved her back with a wave, like the ocean flicking a child's toy onto the sand. And then the water slammed into her, and Corporal Juan finally called a retreat. And we picked up our comrades and vanished into the very forest where we'd lain for ambush not five minutes earlier."

There was a dry footfall beside them, and Fong finally noticed Juan herself standing there, her arms now free of any injured compatriots. Her face was grim but steady, and he turned to her like a desperate man flailing for a lifeline.

"Is all this true, Juan? One... spirit took out your entire squad?"

Juan said nothing but reached to her belt, silently unsheathing her sword and offering it up to him for inspection. Even in the shadows lent by the overhanging of rock above their heads, he could see the dull gleam of blood on its edge, and he stared as he realised its ramifications.

Juan lifted her mouth in a dark smile. "She took out my entire squad, all right. But as to whether she was a spirit..."

Fong opened his mouth, but then was suddenly interrupted by Jin-su. "Of course she was a spirit! She reached inside me!" He whimpered. "I feel... violated.

Both Juan and Fong stared at him. Jin-su drew himself up. "_Kinetically_ violated," he added piteously.

For a moment, the Sergeant-Major was torn between groaning, incinerating the man's throat, and merely rolling his eyes.

"Go... go lie down, Jin-su," he ordered resignedly. But then his eyes gleamed in the shadows. "_We'll_ figure out how to deal with this... spirit."  


* * *

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A/N II - And again, thank you to everyone who has reviewed, old and new alike. It means a lot that you're still sticking with me after so long - one of my honoured reviewers has pointed out my lack of fanservice to me (indeed, the same reviewer who so graciously gave me permission to use the awesome term 'kinetically violated' in this chapter ^.^), and I hope to address that soon! So thanks again, and I really do hope you enjoyed this chapter. Thank you for reading. :)


	17. Trust

**Chapter 17: Trust**

Disclaimer: Not mine already, don't sue. :)

A/N I - I don't think I can say thank you enough times to the wonderful people who have reviewed. Thank you once again for your support, your loyalty, your constructive criticisms, your enthusiasm. You are an integral part of this story's journey and mine. :)

* * *

_Slivered stream_

_And rapid song,_

_Know one in blood,_

_Or trust the throng

* * *

  
_

Zuko was cold. Cold in the _Fire_ Nation, and under his _Court_ robes. And as if that were not mind-boggling enough...

"Okay," he nodded as if he were relaxed and in complete control. "So you're saying that approximately two hundred refugees are going to be on our doorstep soon, and we don't have the facilities to house them?"

Arguably, the only comfort he had was that Chief Advisor Hui had delivered the news with the same poise as he always had. Now that Shen Li was gone, Zuko had found himself depending more and on the older noble, and the fact that Hui had remained so composed throughout the preceding Court session was a calming reminder that he should behave similarly. Zuko sighed inwardly. Then again, it wasn't much of a comfort.

"Well... not exactly, Fire Lord. You see, the city does have its share of inns and taverns which should be able to take the brunt of the flood. But with the peace summit coming up and the foreign delegates arriving, I fear that we will be severely stretched for space."

Zuko snorted almost inaudibly. "I don't think that should be too much of a problem," he muttered to himself without thinking.

Hui's eyes sharpened. "There are troubles?"

Zuko startled. He had been sitting in the throne room holding court for almost two hours now, and his attention was beginning to lapse even when he knew it shouldn't. Cursing himself for having let the problems about the peace summit slip, he swung into damage control mode. "Not really," he hastened to explain. "It's just that perhaps our original goals were a little too optimistic. Many of the leaders are currently needed in their homes to maintain control, but with the Avatar on side, I think that everyone is aware that there is some sort of unofficial peace. That just means that a formal summit will have to be delayed a little."

Hui's eyebrows rose. "I see," he said neutrally. "Well in that case, I see little problem in terms of housing the first stream of refugees. They will find shelter in our current facilities easily enough."

"Good, good..." Zuko nodded, before stopping himself abruptly. "Wait, did you just say the _first_ stream of refugees? Have there been more reports?"

It was the Chief Advisor's turn to be startled, this time out of his benign composure. "No, but isn't it clear that there will be?" Hui's grayish brown eyes rose to meet Zuko's. "There are many villages dotted around our main island, Fire Lord. The reports that we have heard so far mention only four or five of them."

Zuko resisted the urge to grind his teeth. It wasn't as if Hui _sounded_ condescending. Indeed, the man had been in his position for so long he had probably learnt to skim his words within a hair's breadth of any emotion at all. Still, Zuko didn't have to hear it to know that shreds of it were there. "I know that, Chief Advisor," he said, trying not to sound defensive. "But what makes you think that there will be more?"

This time, Hui didn't bother to hide. "People do not just decide to abandon their homes, Pr- Fire Lord Zuko," he chided. "There is clearly something at work, and I expect that the reports will come in soon to enlighten us. But until then, we must plan for the long term."

Zuko gave up and ground his teeth. He was tired of being stuck in the throne room listening to fawning courtiers throw themselves at his feet about troubles insignificant compared to his greater worries. He was tired of waiting around for reports and of trying so desperately to balance truth with concealment. Most of all, he was tired at the constant battle raging inside of him as he reigned, trying to find a balance between harshness and compassion, control and impulse, his instincts and the unspoken rules of Court. And it showed, because he had to be slipping badly for Hui to be taking him to task like this.

Sitting back, Zuko expelled an almost fiery breath. He wasn't sure whether he was more annoyed at Hui or himself at the moment. He wasn't normally like this, he reminded himself desperately. In fact, he had been coping surprisingly well with the minutiae of being Fire Lord so far. But with Shen Li and Mai gone, the problems piling up, and the lines of trust, truth and honour blurring with lies...

Abruptly, Zuko turned to the window. It was small in the throne room, perched high above metres of wall to offer an angled glance into the blue of the sky. But what it meant still remained. He knew that he shouldn't be here. He should be out with Shen Li and Mai, investigating the nature of this newest threat to his people.

But instead, he was stuck in Court, listening to lying nobles and waiting for reports.

Zuko gripped the sides of his throne. "I'm quite aware of the need for long term planning, Chief Advisor," he said crisply, frustration sharpening his focus once more. "However, my issues with this matter stem from the fact that it is difficult to plan for the long term when we are not even aware of what the long term may hold."

Again, Hui looked at him oddly. "We are never aware of what the future may hold, Fire Lord," he said reasonably. "However, I think it is clear that the reports of these bandit raids will only increase, therefore we must prepare for the consequences."

_Bandits?_ Zuko was glad he was in control of his mental faculties once more, otherwise he would have likely blurted something out that would have given his extracurricular knowledge away. And for now, he still wasn't quite sure whether Hui could be trusted with that information. Despite his heavier reliance on the man, he hadn't been so obtuse as to not notice the shared glimpses his Chief Advisor kept having with some of his Ministers. He would have to tread carefully.

"If what you say is correct, then preparation shouldn't be a problem for the first stream of refugees," Zuko kept his tone carefully schooled, watching Hui for any hint of expression. "But how about prevention?"

Nothing flickered across Hui's face. "What are you proposing, my Lord?"

"Heading off these... bandits first. If we deal with the raiders, then there will be no need for anyone to flee their homes and retreat to the city." A lick of Zuko's tightly held frustration escaped. "It's better than just sitting around on our hands!"

If he'd been slower, he wouldn't have caught it. As such, Zuko was rewarded with his first bounty when the Chief Advisor paused for just a moment, his serene countenance fading into sadness before snapping back into place.

"I'm afraid that's impossible, my Lord," Hui said resignedly.

Zuko counted to ten. "And just what about that proposition was impossible, Chief Advisor?"

Hui folded his arms into his sleeves. "The entire thing, my Lord. I'm afraid that when it comes to prevention, we can do nothing."

The words stretched out in his mind like thin, fine wire, and then Zuko snapped. "_Nothing_?" he hissed. "For Agni's sake, I'm the Fire Lord! These are my people!

Hui shrugged helplessly. "Until we know more our hands are tied. But then, even if we did know our enemy's power and plans..."

He left it trailing there like bait, and Zuko wanted to swear as he pounced on it. "What?" he demanded curtly.

The old man sighed. "Fire Lord, the majority of our troops are in the Earth Kingdom. Or dead. We only have a few garrisons here. Even moving one of them away to deal with these bandits would leave the city unprotected."

Zuko's eyes narrowed. "Are you trying to tell me that I'm helpless?"

A strange look glinted in Hui's gaze. "Power is relative, my Lord."

"There is nothing _relative_ about the safety of my people and my country." Zuko's eyes narrowed. "Chief Advisor, if you're trying to tell me there's a way to solve this without using military force I'd be glad to hear it."

The words were strong, forceful, and they parted around the old man like water around a rock. The old man paused then, as if something had just occurred to him. "Actually, perhaps we might use our two problems to our advantage," Hui mused. "Make the best of a bad situation, so to speak."

Zuko's ears perked. "What do you suggest?"

"Well, the depletion of our forces here means that we have several barracks left vacant in the city. Perhaps the following streams of refugees might be bunked there?"

For some reason, Zuko felt a strange sense of deja vu, and he remembered another time on the Fire Nation docks, watching as Aang, Toph and Appa flew away.. "You are wise, Chief Advisor," he said neutrally, waiting for the other to respond.

But this time, Hui remained standing. "I serve my nation, Fire Lord," he said softly, and Zuko felt a strange prickle run down his neck as Hui's look became searching. For a moment, Zuko fluctuated between pride and the compelling urge to tear his gaze from such an alien examination. But then before he could decide, Hui pulled away smiling.

"Just like you do," the Chief Advisor said in satisfaction. "Just like you do."

* * *

In the minutes that she waited, Mai took careful stock of her situation. It was tiresome, annoying work, especially when all she wanted to do was curl up and go to sleep. But now that she was conscious, the noblewoman knew that she simply couldn't afford to let her guard down. She was alone in an unfamiliar forest, with absolutely no clue how far she'd been washed downstream. She was also still weak, as much as she loathed to admit it, from the death-defying plunge she had taken. Added to that, the fact that her nearest known ally was still a distrusted former enemy made her determined to be on her feet and fending for herself again as soon as possible.

Of course, to do that, her body had to heal first. Cautiously, Mai sat up straighter, flexing each muscle in turn and listening for the response. A great, painful bruise curled its way up her leg, and although she couldn't see it, she knew that another was splayed across the surface of her back. Briefly, Mai remembered the rushing, tumultuous moments of when she'd first hit the water. It had been such a moment of chance - the frothy wave had been arcing high at that second, with just enough force to slide her over a submerged rock which would have surely killed her and into the deeper, choking currents of the water. What memory she had of what happened after that was filled with flashes of pain, hard stone that had battered her body and a particularly bad moment where she'd tried to cling on to something, resulting in the water snapping her back with terrifying force against a ragged boulder which she hadn't noticed. And then had come the choking, the clawing, the dazed stunning even as she tried to breathe, tried to fight against the water even as its force dragged her down to the bottom and made her bleed against the rocks. Now, as Mai flexed her shoulders, she was almost grateful for the oblivion that had followed soon after, when the back of her head had struck something else.

Still, once she'd completed the round of testing from her toes to her fingers and back again, Mai was surprised to find that she was mainly aching, as if her muscles had undergone a strenuous boot camp for a half a week. Frowning, the noblewoman cast her mind back and slowly pieced together the blue glow, the gentle voice, and the sapphire eyes. Magic.

Which brought her back to her former enemy. The waterbender. Katara. The slight declivity of Mai's lips deepened as she thought about her. She'd heard from Ty Lee that the girl had disappeared, and now it was patently obvious where she had gone. But why? Who was she to drag a drowned girl from the river? Who was she to dress up as the Painted Lady? For that matter, who was she to heal said drowned girl, even after everything that had happened between them?

The questions buzzed in her mind, and quite frankly, annoyed her. Although she seemed to have been mostly healed, her body had yet to recover, and the idea of being dependent on an unknown not only galled her, it worried her. Mai _liked_ being in control of a situation, being able to weigh up all the factors with a critical eye before she made her choices. But with the waterbender's confusing emotions and... and... _charity_, Mai felt as if she were grasping at straws. Somewhere in her mind, she knew that she would feel better if she could simply see it all as a court game of debts and dues; see Katara's actions as merely a ploy to gain something in return, a benefit or a profit from Mai's continued existence and debt. But not only was there no reason for that to be true, the shocking unguardedness in the waterbender's eyes and face had screamed louder than words to the contrary.

Mai expelled a breath. It was that same openness, that emotionality which unnerved her, made her unsure of her footing with the waterbender. She really was the strangest girl. If Katara had kept a blank face, stayed neutral and tended to her as any other restrained healer or politician, Mai would have been at ease.

But she hadn't.

Surprisingly enough, it was the memory of the waterbender's feelings chasing themselves so openly and so naturally across her face which spurred Mai to action. Shoving away the confused roil of her thoughts, the noblewoman eyed her body critically. Her clothes were dry, but they hung messily on her body, no doubt rearranged and ripped by both the river and the waterbender's hands as she sought to heal her. Fighting down the sudden rush of blood to her cheeks at the thought, Mai flexed each set of muscles again. If she couldn't find her feet psychologically in her new situation, she was damn well going to try finding it physically so she could be out of here as soon as possible and back to her mission and...

And Shen Li.

Suddenly, Mai stopped moving. The guard captain. Where was he now? The last she remembered of him was his stricken eyes as he watched her fall, and the memory almost made her grind her teeth. What was he doing now? Did he think she was dead? Was he going ahead with the mission? Was he looking for her? Even while the trained and regimented Fire Nation warrior in her hoped that he'd kept his head and gone ahead with the mission, she could feel the twist of a quietly traitorous wish, one that she quickly left wordless and weak against the iron of her will.

_Left behind, nothing special, _an echo of Azula's voice taunted her, and suddenly Mai was moving again, gripping the rough bark of the tree behind her as she tried to move her body into obedience, tried to stand against the ache and throbbing pain of her muscles. She got perhaps halfway up before everything gave way and she slipped and fell. Cursing silently in the recesses of her mind, Mai tried again, an almost desperation fuelling her limbs. Up. Up. She had to get up. Get back on her feet. Get back to herself. Get back _control_...

And then all thoughts of the guard captain and of rising vanished from her mind. Mai heard an alien rush of water against the background of the river, and she looked up to see the ethereal form of the Painted Lady. The surprise was enough to bring her back down to earth again, but her attention was too fixed on the figure in front of her to properly notice.

The mist parted, and then the spirit was flesh once more. Katara stepped down from her wave on the river, looking exhausted and battle-torn. Mai blinked as she realised that Katara hadn't lied. She'd come back. She had.

Soundlessly, Mai raised her head and watched as the waterbender shrugged off her shawl, revealing a nasty graze on her left arm. Wearily, Katara walked to the small tent set up deeper in the clearing, her belongings bundled in a small bag by its opening. A low wince of pain fell from her lips as she bent down to lay the shawl on the pile, and Mai waited for Katara to walk back to the river and heal herself, curious to see it done before her eyes. Yet when the now recognisable blue glow shimmered into existence, the waterbender was heading in her direction, and Mai's eyes widened faintly in surprise.

"How are you feeling?" Katara asked kindly, crouching down to the noblewoman's eye level.

"I'm fine," Mai said, a little uncomfortable. Even though she knew it was just a girl beneath the paint and the golden crescent, it was difficult to stare the Painted Lady in the face. "You can take off that veil now, you know. I already know who you are."

Katara shrugged. "Later. Let me check your back and chest again."

The underlying inflection of care in her voice sounded painfully foreign. Mai froze for a moment, almost wishing she was unconscious again. But she wasn't, and Katara was waiting, some strange vessel of what Mai vaguely recognised as sympathy in her eyes. Grinding her teeth, the noblewoman expelled a sharp breath of air and turned away slightly. When she didn't move further, the waterbender took it as acceptance and carefully inched forwards to unwind the clothing.

Mai steadfastly looked away as the scraps of material spilled scratchily from her shoulders in rips and tears, the holes large enough in some areas for Katara to simply reach through and apply the water there. The two girls were silent for a few moments, one concentrating, the other bearing it through with a tightly clenched jaw. Finally, Katara pulled back, folding the garments back to cover Mai's skin once more.

"There," she said unnecessarily, sitting back on her heels. "It should be feeling better pretty quickly now."

Mai nodded in response, her mouth strangely dry. "Thank you," she rasped reluctantly, turning back from where she'd been studiously eying the darkness of the woods to face her healer. In the softness of the moonlight, Katara's face was almost serenely beautiful, the compassion on it reminding her strangely of someone else. Mai found herself staring in an attempt to pick out exactly what kinship she was seeing, before snapping herself out of it when she realised the waterbender was speaking.

"... to be honest, though, I'm surprised," Katara admitted, absentmindedly playing with the small pool of water in her hand. "You took some pretty nasty scrapes against the rocks, and the injury on your head was terrible. All things considering, it's a miracle you didn't..." she paused suddenly, glanced at her patient, and then had the grace to look disconcerted. "Well, uh, break anything."

_Yeah. Miracles. _Mai struggled against the impulse to voice the word left unspoken. _It was a miracle you didn't die._ For some reason, the thought sounded too suspicious and wondering in her head at that moment, and so she said nothing. Instead, she shrugged lightly, and she felt Katara's eyes slide over her impassive face before sighing and turning away, taking the silence as a signal that the exchange of words was over. Surprisingly, Mai felt an odd pang of regret as the waterbender stood, walked a few paces to her tent, and then finally began to tend to herself. She was still questioning herself as to why she felt so uncertain when she registered Katara beginning to loosen the veil and hat, and as they started pulling off. Mai stared at the sight revealed underneath.

"You look ridiculous," she said bluntly before she could stop herself.

Katara felt the tangles behind her and pulled a face. "Well, it's not like I had time to do my hair properly before I went," she muttered resignedly, tugging at the veil. "It held up all right until I was fighting."

Surprisingly enough though, there was no rancour in Katara's voice. Mai had been expecting annoyance at least, but even that wasn't there. Instead, the waterbender seemed merely... accepting. It was enough to make the noblewoman pause. And then, without even realising it, Mai rose slowly to her feet.

It was hard at first. She had to grip the tree for support, lever her blood-deprived legs beneath her and move clumsily with the pins and needles. But even then, Mai wasn't finished. Her body complaining at every step, Mai shakily closed the distance between them. Each newly healed muscle throbbing and aching as she walked, but Mai paid them no heed, concentrating instead on anything but the suddenly quizzical look on Katara's face. When she finally reached the other girl, Mai reached forwards with weighted fingers and lifted the veil and the hat off her head. Dropping them down to land lightly on the shawl, Mai turned back. And then, as if it were the most natural thing in the world, she picked up the brush from Katara's pile of belongings and began combing out her hair.

Instantly, she was surprised by how luxurious it was. The strands fell like rippled silk through her fingers, and she decided that despite the knots, it was clear that the waterbender took care of herself. Still, the tenseness beneath the chocolate strands also told Mai that said waterbender was still frozen in surprise.

"Wh... What are you doing?"

Mai pushed a huff of breath out between her lips. "What does it feel like?" she replied sarcastically. "Now hold still."

Mai didn't know what to think when Katara hesitated, and then closed her eyes and allowed her to continue. A small ripple of surprise pushed at her from the implicit trust in those actions, an implicit trust that even Katara's continued tenseness didn't diminish. And given everything that had happened in the past year, the battlefields, the betrayals and the fight, Mai wasn't sure whether to believe in her eyes or her suspicions.

The Fire Nation girl exhaled slightly in annoyance, picked up a particularly snarled tangle, and then patiently began to work the brush through. If she didn't think about everything else, the work was oddly soothing, so much that she decided to take her own advice for once and just concentrate on the task at hand. It was slow, careful work, but it took her mind off the tumult in her thoughts, the confusion and the unsettling feeling that she was treading on new and uncharted land. Soon, the combination of Mai's slow, methodical strokes and the natural beauty of Katara's hair left the tresses smooth and silky against the waterbender's back, and without missing a beat, Mai began to gather it up in a neat braid.

When the last hair was clipped back, the noblewoman stepped back and surveyed her work. _Not bad, not bad at all_, Mai thought, a strange sense of satisfaction settling in her chest. But then her eyes drifted down to the waterbender herself, and at the questioning blue glance, she quickly became unsettled again. Struck, Mai folded her arms back in her sleeves. "What?" she asked defensively. "I used to do this for Ty Lee all the time."

Katara gingerly touched her fingertips to her head, and then pulled them away. "No... I mean..." she paused, and then her blue eyes swam up to meet the other's gaze truthfully. "Thank you."

Mai looked at her oddly, uncomfortably, warily. Truth and honesty shone from those blue eyes, the same eyes which had watched over her while she slept, had monitored her healing as she recovered, and had shone with the vastest range of guileless emotions Mai had ever seen.

The noblewoman shook her head She really was the strangest girl.

"You're welcome," she finally responded, and whether she meant it to or not, her voice held more of something indescribable, something that wasn't boredom or anger or hurt, than it had for weeks.

* * *

It was a slightly unsettled Zuko who stumbled out of the throne room to meet his next engagement, the sun shining almost painfully into his eyes. Given all the way that the day had began, he was fairly certain that facing up to members of the general populace was _not_ going to an enjoyable experience. But Ty Lee was already waiting by the palace entrance... although 'waiting' was perhaps too broad a term for her current position.

Zuko folded his arms over his chest. "I'm not paying you to dangle from the dragon decorations."

Upside down, the acrobat's face instantly turned contrite. Reaching up with one hand, she unhooked her legs and then somersaulted herself backwards, landing with a perfect spring in front of him. "Oh, I'm sorry Zuko! It's just that I was waiting and I was bored and..."

Zuko pinched the bridge of his nose, trying to alleviate the last strains of his headache. "It's all right," he amended. "It's just..." _I want to kill something. I want to find something. I want answers. _ "... I've had a long morning."

Ty Lee nodded sympathetically and expectantly, as if waiting for him to elaborate. And somehow, the open acceptance on her face spurred him to blurt out the question on his mind. After all, here was a willing ear... who more importantly had been in the Fire Nation while he'd been banished. Still, Zuko internally clenched as the words came out. It galled him to feel so uncertain about his own judgement, but right now he _really_ needed a second opinion.

The Fire Lord took a deep breath. "Tell me, what do you think of Hui?"

The acrobat looked surprised. "The Chief Advisor?"

At Zuko's nod of affirmation, her mouth screwed up in thought. "Well, um... I don't really know much about him," she offered uncertainly. "I mean you know I was never at Court much."

Zuko's heart sunk. "Of course. Forget I mentioned it."

"But that's not to say I didn't hear things!" Ty Lee was suddenly bright again, glad that she could help. "From what I know, he seems to take his role as Advisor really seriously, thinking it's all about neutrality and wisdom of experience and all that. Oh! And I heard that in his spare time he funds and visits orphanages and schools. Isn't that nice? Something about giving stirring speeches about Fire Nation culture and trying to keep traditions alive..."

Ty Lee trailed off as she saw that Zuko was no longer directly listening to her, his far-off gaze suggesting instead that he was busily filing away and analysing the information. Her eyes sparked with curiosity. "Why do you ask?"

Caught out, Zuko snapped back to attention. "Hmm?"

Ty Lee bounced on her toes. "Why do you ask?" she inquired again.

"Well, uh..." At her questioning look he sighed and cradled his head briefly in his palm. "Honestly? Don't worry about it. I don't think it's too important. Maybe I'm just overreacting..."

Ty Lee's brows furrowed, and when Zuko looked into her guileless eyes, for some reason an echo of a night long past murmured in his brain. _I know you. _He blinked and it was gone, but the memory remained and Zuko almost started when the acrobat spoke again.

"Trouble with the nobles?" she asked. As she spoke, she flipped onto her hands and began to handstand-walk ahead of him. He followed the curious spectacle of her with a sigh.

"Trouble with everyone," he summarised curtly, "But that's old news. How about you? Have you anything to report?"

Abruptly, Ty Lee lowered herself to her feet again and moved back to walk at his side. Covering his surprise at the suddenly serious look on her face, Zuko turned to her as they began to walk out of the palace. For a moment, he wondered whether he should call his palanquin bearers so they could talk in some semblance of privacy... but then he remembered the point of the exercise and stayed his hand. The small coterie of guards trailing them should be enough, he decided grimly, and then focused his attention back on his companion.

"They're mostly friendly enough," the acrobat began haltingly. At that, Zuko couldn't stop himself from eyeing her pink outfit, her cute braid, her innocent features, and he knew again that he'd made the right choice for his Public Relations officer. _Everyone loves you. But me? That's an entirely different equation. _"But a lot of them are really... well... edgy. No one's sure what you're trying to do with the soldiers. I think your speech at the coronation helped... that was really _good_ by the way. I noticed quite a few people spoke approvingly of that. The only problem is that you didn't really outline any specifics, and so people are starting to doubt again. And a lot of them, well..."

She gave him a quick, surreptitious glance, and Zuko suddenly felt inordinately tired. "Just say it, Ty Lee."

She looked away. "A lot of them are saying pretty mean things about you," the acrobat admitted. "And I mean, _really_. It's not like I lived with you this past year or anything, but I'm pretty sure most of them are lies."

Zuko said nothing. Ty Lee subsided unhappily, sensing the deep torrents running underneath his guise. They passed the palace gates with only a brief conversation to the guards and a firm order, and as the Fire Lord stepped onto the streets a shot of memory passed through him. It hadn't been so long ago that the instant he stepped outside, a cheering throng was awaiting to sing his praises.

Now there were no crowds. He hadn't announced that he was venturing out, and so people were milling around the roads as per normal, going about their business. He read weariness and fatigue in their movements, saw wariness and distrust in their faces as they haggled and bought and cared. For a moment, it seemed like they were in a strange vacuum as Zuko clinically looked over this fragment of his people, seeing Ty Lee's words playing out in front of him.

But even that didn't last for long. Slowly, people began to realise that their new Fire Lord was amongst them, and the trade and daily travails gradually ceased. At the change, half of his party of soldiers split off to drift amongst the crowd, attempting to identify and ward off threats while the other half stayed at a protective distance behind him. Zuko felt his lips lift slightly in a humourless grin at the reminder of his security ultimatum, and then turned to the task at hand.

Slowly, cautiously, the Fire Lord talked one on one with his people. It began innocently enough at first, inquiring after their days and the current situation Ty Lee took him by the arm and led him around, still somehow managing to be deferential, approachable, and her same bubbly self to everyone they met. Zuko on the other hand was less comfortable. He moved his mouth around reassuring words, spoke of promises and honour and even the specifics of his policies when he was asked. At that, he saw surprise in their faces at his honesty, saw it displace the misgivings and turn doubt and dislike into uncertainty. But even as he spoke, he knew that it would take actions and not words to convince his people.

So he wasn't surprised when a young boy, barely seven, stepped up to him and spat at his feet. In fact, in the clamour and cry that followed, Zuko actually felt oddly detached. It was as if his mind had separated from his body, as if he were merely looking on as he spun in front of the child and sent a warning ring of flame at his own guards when they dove for him.

Zuko was barely aware of the crowd of shocked faces as he issued one last sharp command to his guards not to harm the boy, and then crouched down on one knee to meet his subject's eye level. The boy was shaking now, his eyes wide with fright and his face pale. He was dressed in a well-made tunic, probably the son of some minor well-to-do merchant, and his hair was done in a flawless topknot. Zuko couldn't help but grin humourlessly at the shock on the boy's face. Clearly he had not thought his defiance through before he'd done it. That, and his still childlike features, was all it took to gentle the Fire Lord's voice.

"What's your name?" Zuko asked raspily.

The boy stared mutinously at him, all too aware of the crowd now around them, silently watching as the drama played out. For a moment he was tempted to spit again, make some political statement that his people would be proud of. But then he focused on the man in front of him, and on the almost eerie calmness he wore like a cloak.

The boy swallowed. "Hing."

"Hing," Zuko gazed at him seriously, and the boy noticed that he had large, grave eyes that seemed weighted with too much of the world. "Why did you do that?"

Hing was incredulous. Wasn't it obvious? Did the traitor prince really think he could just waltz back to his country and expect everyone to be happy? He was about to spit the words out when he made the mistake of looking back into those golden eyes, and then everything froze.

Suddenly, he was confused. Father had told him that the traitor prince was weak, cowardly, and most of all, dishonourable. _Dishonourable_. One of the worst insults that a Fire Nation citizen could use. And yet... the man in front of him didn't seem weak or cowardly. He held himself like a royal, a quiet constancy in his gaze, and that was what made Hing's breath rush out of his lungs in a different form.

"Why did _you_ do what you did?" the boy asked unhappily, unsure now of whether to trust his eyes or his ears.

The Fire Lord seemed to consider the question for less than a second, yet when he tilted his head to answer he somehow gave the impression that he had deliberated upon it for much longer. "I did it to save my country," he said calmly. "I did it for the Fire Nation."

Hing's eyes opened in disbelief. And years of training, months of learning his family's ways and mouthing his Father's objections made him spit in the dust again. "Save our country?! You _betrayed_ our country!"

The thin, childlike voice carried unbelievably far in the wind. Zuko rose to his feet, slowly, the memories of another time and another face weighing him down. And again, this time with even more surety, he looked down at the boy with steadfast strength.

"That's not the way I see it," he said simply.

There were no insults, no cries of declamation. There was no cheering. There was only silence as Fire Lord Zuko stood, turned, and began to slowly walk back to the palace. He left a little boy behind him, confused, angry, and still too old for his age. And the people watched him as he went, noting closely each and every aspect of him, seizing on the tiniest hint of feeling shown by his body. There was not an ounce of defeat in his step; he walked like a man double his age and with triple the quiet confidence, and that somehow made the crowd doubt, made the crowd wonder, made the crowd disperse as silently as they had formed.

Ahead of them, Zuko closed his eyes briefly and thanked Agni for the silence. It might have seemed damning, but at least the absence of noise could mean many things, good as well as bad. Besides, anything had to be better than the cruel twist of applause...

Zuko steadied himself with a breath at the memory. That night on Ember Island had been... numbing. He remembered the shock of hearing people cheer as his twisted doppleganger on stage disappeared into the shadow of flame. It had been surreal, watching the caricature of himself die. But what had almost ended him had been the cries of approval afterwards...

No one else had questioned him later about it. The entire play had been a shock to everyone, after all. But a gulf had opened inside him that night, and if it hadn't been for the single, strength-giving brown hand that crept over the distance between them and squeezed, he might have given himself into the despair.

Zuko's eyes snapped open. He had no time for despair. Not now, not when everything was still resting on him, when everyone was depending on him. Sure, the cringe-worthy play had been frighteningly effective in spreading lies and hate. But he would just have to step up to the challenge once again, make them see...

And sudden idea alighted in Zuko's brain. A sudden, impossible, rapturous idea that almost stopped him in his tracks. As it was, it occupied him for the rest of the walk back, the intentness on his face making his pink-clad companion wilt with worry.

So intent was he that he barely noticed the palace gates closing behind them, the murmured order making the guards disappear more instinct than conscious thought. Soon it was just Zuko and Ty Lee walking slowly along in silence, making their way back to the palace. Neither said a word, the former still lost in thought, the latter anxious and fretful, until finally she let her worries override her other concerns.

"Zuko?" Ty Lee asked timidly. "Are you okay?"

The Fire Lord jerked back into his body. "What? Oh, I'm fine. Just... thinking."

Ty Lee's plait fell off her shoulder as she cocked her head. "Thinking about what?"

Zuko suddenly halted abruptly, almost in mid-step. "Tell me, do you think we could get someone to re-write a play?" At her surprised look, he hastened to elaborate. "Specifically, the play about the Avatar and the last year. I want to get a re-write. I want to give people the truth. Do you think we could get someone to re-write it?"

"Well sure!" Ty Lee said, her gray eyes still a little confused. "There're a few great bards around, but most of them have been penniless during the war. And there are the court-employed ones..."

Zuko thought of the old crow-ravens huddling over their propaganda and shuddered. "No. Not them," he said firmly. "There has to be someone else I can sponsor, someone else I can talk to."

Ty Lee frowned. "We-ell... from my time at the circus we heard of some pretty cool playwright groups. Maybe I could look them up for you."

"Do that, please," Zuko narrowed his eyes, lost in thought. "We'll have to organise some time where we can sit down and give a true, corroborated version. I want to have scribes and soldiers who were there to vouchsafe our version of events. I want the public to know the _truth_. We'll have to organise some legal thing to swear it in."

The acrobat nodded. "That sounds like a great idea!"

It was as if Zuko hadn't heard her, so wrapped up in his idea that the world seemed to blur at the edges. "We'll have to make some massive changes to the casting as well," he mused. "For one, we need to find a new actress for Katara. That, or the old one has to lose weight, learn how to act, lose the make up, become actually beautiful and... no scratch that, we definitely need a new actress."

Ty Lee paused and watched with great interest as unconsciously, the Fire Lord's grim face softened. "Yes. We need... we need one who can do it _right_. One who can be passionate and strong, be... be loving and kind. Be terrifying and... and compassionate. Be forgiving, and, and... _what_? Why are you staring at me like that?"

"Oh nothing, nothing," the acrobat smiled roguishly, her eyes twinkling. "Just thinking something, that's all."

Out of habit, Zuko scowled, his eyes narrowed suspiciously. In an effort to look more imposing, the Fire Lord crossed his arms. Unconsciously, a more menacing tone crept into his voice, one that hearkened back to older days searching for the Avatar and _I'll save you from the pirates._ "And what might that be, pray tell?"

Ty Lee's eyes rounded. "Oh nothing, really nothing. It's just that... well, you know. Since you're the Fire Lord and all, not to mention the sponsor, I'm sure they'll run the castings by you before they lock them in."

The innocent look on her face was enough to deepen his suspicion, but Zuko also knew when to give up... for now. Focusing on the second part of what she'd said, he smirked. "Excellent."

And then he paused as if something had just occurred to him, and the smirk became vicious. "And this time, they'd better get the scar on the right damn side."

* * *

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A/N II - What can I say? Thanks for reading, and please do review. Zuko would like to know what you think of his new idea. :)


	18. Perhaps

**Chapter 18: Perhaps**

Disclaimer: Not mine, don't sue.

A/N I: I'd just like to say thanks again for the bunch of you that reviewed. I don't think I can say it enough, because you truly give me succour and support through all my doubts and worries as I write. You are like the cardinal constellations in the sky, helping me keep my way through stormy seas. Thank you.

And in particular, since I can't Review Reply to annonymous reviews, I just wanted to say thanks to ristakay and syzorst. To ristakay: It's great to hear that you're enjoying this, OCs and all, and thanks very much for reviewing! As for syzorst, I've planned this story to be much more than the sum of its ships, so I'd like to hope that you enjoy its development regardless (although I think if you look at my profile and favourites it's fairly obvious which ships I support).

So thanks to you both, and to you all once again for sticking with me. I hope you enjoy this chapter. :)

* * *

Perhaps ye'll trust,

Perhaps ye'll cruise,

Perhaps ye'll dust,

Perhaps ye'll lose.

* * *

Aang stretched himself out in the sun like a happy lemur. Court was finally over for the day, and to be honest, he felt they'd done pretty well. There had been a few recalcitrant nobles, but nothing so big that he couldn't handle. He was beginning to wonder if Iroh had been exaggerating. Perhaps Ba Sing Se wasn't so bad after all. Sure, they had come here to prevent a fairly bloody mission. But now that that had calmed down and the cooperative re-building scheme had been entered into, things could only get better...

THWACK!

Aang had a brief moment to register a blinding sphere of pain before he was thrown off his perch and sent spiralling to the ground. And then the next thing he knew his instincts had kicked in, and a gust of wind softened his landing. Still, he hadn't quite been quick enough, and he sucked in a pained gasp of air as he collided with the stone.

"Toph!" he wheezed. "What do you think you're doing?!"

The little earthbender strode over to him, poised as tall as her frame allowed her and twice as indomitable. "Teaching you a lesson!" she snapped. She crossed her arms as she stood over him. "What were you _doing_ out here? You didn't even hear me coming!"

Aang blinked the last few stars from his eyes and scowled. "Well you could have said something."

She brushed it aside. "Or you could have paid attention! Honestly, you need to get back onto your twinkly toes oh Mighty Avatar. We're not going to accomplish anything if you keep goofing around."

Now that got his attention. Aang stumbled to his feet, annoyance turning to near anger. "Monkey feathers!" he swore. "What's your problem, Toph? Have you got something against relaxing once in a while? Court ended only half an hour ago. It's been a long day, don't I deserve a rest?"

To his ears, her voice sounded cruel. "There's a difference between resting and just not being there at all. Don't think I didn't notice, Twinkletoes. You weren't in Court today. You were someplace else."

Her words jolted the inner stubbornness within him, and Aang's chin jutted forwards. "So? It's not like I missed much, anyway. Just more nobles and their stupid problems. All we do is get it into their heads that there's peace now. As soon as they realise that, it'll be fine."

It was amazing how such a little body could radiate so much anger, because if Aang was inching closer towards it, Toph was already there. "No it _won_'t be fine, Twinkletoes. You're blinder than I am if you can't see that. Were you listening to the petitioners at _all_ today?"

Despite himself, Aang could feel the resentment surface in his voice. "Of course I was. And what I'm telling you is that it doesn't matter. The war's over. I've... we've saved the world. Everything's going well. The problems in Ba Sing Se are just a bunch of nobles with too much time on their hands."

Something cold glittered in her eyes at that, and for a moment Aang's apprehension overcame his anger. The resentment simmered out of his voice to be replaced by placation. "Really Toph, it'll be okay. Everything's solved now, we just need to wait for things to work out."

Too late, he noticed her compressed lips and the strain in her glossy eyes. "Sure it is," she said. "In that case, how do you explain Zuko almost getting offed by an assassin two days ago?"

Outwardly, Aang gaped. Inwardly, his mind ran back to a world of mists and a muddy pool of seeing, and he remembered the white face, the wires and the knives. "But he's okay, right?"

Toph made a rather unladylike sound, then stomped a few steps closer and prodded him in the chest. "That isn't the _point_, Twinkletoes! The point is that someone wants Zuko dead, which would probably spark off the war again. Not to mention, if someone wants Zuko dead, then that same someone would probably want you dead, and you just let me get within five feet of you and brain you with a boulder without even blinking an eyelid!"

Dimly, Aang finally recognised what hid underneath the anger of her voice. Fear. But the semi-unconscious part of him latched onto the shape it took and its ramifications. Suddenly, it was as if her words had thrown him back in time, back to visions of hate and blood, to the reality of fire and earth they'd faced only two days ago, and before long what he'd seen in the spirit world had blurred with what he'd seen in the physical.

Aang felt the responsibility hover in the air around him, and then it dropped back onto his shoulders like a millstone. Hurt, he squeezed his eyes shut. It hadn't been long. Only a few days since he'd fought Ozai. And since then, he'd had to struggle through so many things. Ba Sing Se, Katara, the Fire Nation revolt... he remembered soaring over the city, still feeling the need to right the balance in himself, to consolidate the shifting surety, power and direction in him. An image flashed into his mind of a brown-skinned old man in the lotus position, and the astringent taste of onion and banana juice flooded his mouth. He inhaled a little unsteadily. So many things he needed to do...

He was so tired.

And Toph must have felt it in his heart. For a moment, the earthbender drooped, and he could see the matching rings of fatigue accentuate under her eyes and a flicker of doubt cross her face. And then he was caught up in the most bone crushing hug he'd ever received.

Aang blinked. This couldn't be right. His earthbending teacher was in his arms. His friend, his rock, his runaway who _never_ displayed her affections like this was resting her chin against his shoulder, her hands locked tightly together around his shoulderblades. But before he could even comprehend it, he suddenly felt strength surge anew through him and he hugged her back.

And then they heard a throat clear.

Toph was pushing him roughly away before he could react, her feet flying around in a swift turn as she spun to face the person who'd interrupted them. As the air whooshed out of his lungs, Aang felt rather absurdly smug that someone had crept up on her, even if it was minus the end surprise of a flying boulder. He raised his head a little slower to see who had joined them.

"Miss Toph, Avatar Aang."

"Iroh," the monk nodded, noting the tightly rolled scroll the General clasped in his hand and deducing it as the source of Toph's news. He suddenly felt tired again. "Any other bad news?"

Iroh's face was unreadable. "I assume Miss Toph has told you of the situation?"

Aang nodded again, and Iroh sighed. "Then you'll understand why I wish to return to the Fire Nation and my nephew as soon as possible."

The words seemed to float past his ears, unreal and unfounded. "Of course I do," Aang said weakly, suddenly wishing he could grip his staff for support. He hadn't thought that it'd be this soon. The presence of the Dragon of the West had been so... comforting. So safe. So secure. Somehow, knowing that Iroh was around had been a large part of his descent into complacency, and now that that was changing...

"You're right," he looked away. "Zuko... Zuko will need you."

Aang felt the warm brush of an assessing gaze across his face, and then it shifted, leaving him cold. "And you, Miss Toph? Are you all right?"

Toph was pale. "I'm fine," she said resolutely, twisting her ankles slightly to settle down into her horse stance. At both of their looks, she scowled and lifted her chin up. "I'm fine, I tell you. It's just... Sparky better not give us another scare like that again. I mean, I still haven't gotten payback for that time he burned my feet! He's not allowed to go _anywhere_ until I think up some proper grovelling."

Iroh smiled, but it was clear that he too had been shaken. "Is that so? Well then, I shall endeavour to keep my nephew out of trouble to the best of my abilities. A debt to a lady must always be repaid."

The promise in his voice was enough to stir Aang into action. "But what about us?" the Avatar's brow furrowed. "With Bumi gone as well, I mean..." He swallowed. "It's just the two of us."

Iroh was shaking his head before Aang was finished. "The remaining members of the White Lotus are still here, Aang. They will be able to help guide you."

Aang felt a rising panic clutch at his chest. "But the city doesn't even let them in!"

Even as he said it, he knew that this was the wrong way to cope. The confirmation of that was written on Iroh's face - the Dragon of the West's expression wasn't quite a frown, but it wasn't quite neutral either. Aang floundered in his own thoughts for a moment, trying to make sense of everything, and then all of a sudden a solution appeared.

"Iroh? What if... what if you just delayed your trip back a little?"

A definite shadow connected at the corner of Iroh's lips, and Aang hastened to explain. "It's just... the reason I'm feeling so unsure is that, well, I guess I have some unfinished business left here. You see, even though the war's over, Toph's been reminding me and I've been feeling it myself that I still have stuff to learn. And I think to deal with Ba Sing Se properly I need to learn it."

There was a silence, and then Iroh's look turned appraising again. "And how does this affect my return to the Fire Nation, Aang?"

"Well... you see... I think I need to go see this guy again. Guru Pathik. He lives at the Eastern Air Temple. Not too far away!"

Iroh seemed deep in thought. "I see. So you want me to manage Ba Sing Se while you're gone."

It was a statement, not a question, and Aang's hopes began to slump. "Please?" he asked weakly. "I think... I think it might help."

Against his will, the General felt something in him stir. Aang's liquid gray eyes were round and hopeful, and he was so young, so very, very young. Unbidden, the image of another boy swum into Iroh's mind, and he remembered how grown up Zuko had seemed the last time they'd met, how the weeks they'd spent apart had somehow managed to etch years and strength and true honour onto his nephew's face. Perhaps...

The sun glanced off the outer walls of Ba Sing Se, penetrating the gardens and lighting up motes of dust in the air. Beneath their feet, the earth was firm with the knowledge of summer, and the scent of dying flowers rose up to mingle with the fragrance of freshly cut grass. Iroh looked across the lawn and saw the tiers of stone surrounding them.

"Three days," the general finally said, folding his arms into his sleeves. "You have three days."

* * *

The makeshift campsite was quiet. Mai stirred fitfully in the grass, her hands clutching the blanket beneath her. Katara had kindly offered it, saying she'd be fine sleeping without. And Mai had taken it, because she'd known it wasn't a lie. It was summer now in the Fire Nation, and the stars lay like a thick blanket of silver against a warm midnight sky. Logically, neither of them needed any covering.

Despite this, Mai clung to the wool beneath her like a lifeline. She already knew she wasn't going to get much sleep tonight. Besides the fact that she'd been out for almost an entire day already, too many questions and worries were flying around in her mind, and she didn't want to push them away. They were too insistent, too important to her continued survival and the continued survival of the people she... cared about.

For the twentieth time, the ebony-haired Fire Nation girl started folding herself up, preparing to rise to her feet and stumble to the black shape of the tent, before dropping back into quiescence with a sigh. The shelter was still, the waterbender obviously asleep. What was she going to do? Shake her awake and demand answers?

Mai turned onto her back and stared up at the sky. It lay open and impossibly far-reaching in front of her, much like the anxieties running through her mind. She snorted, and bit back a twinge of what could not possibly be guilt or apprehension. She definitely wasn't going to get any sleep tonight. She might as well get company.

Lifting herself up fully this time, the noblewoman ignored her protesting muscles and dragged herself to her feet. After a few shaky steps, she reached her destination... only to find the tent was empty.

Dumbfounded, Mai scooted back into a crouching position. She hadn't heard the waterbender leave, and she was sure that she hadn't managed to fall asleep. She didn't remember waking up, after all.

Unless... unless Katara was off doing more mysterious things dressed up as the Painted Lady. Mai narrowed her eyes. Earlier, she had not questioned exactly where the waterbender had gone, but the injury she'd brought back with her spoke quite clearly that it hadn't been to pick fire lilies. Suddenly, the political and social implications of her mission reasserted itself fully in her mind once more, complete with the image of the earth swallowing up their basilisks superimposed over the picture of the refugees.

Mai's eyes narrowed further. It couldn't be a coincidence. It couldn't. But then, if Katara was involved, just what did that mean...?

"Couldn't sleep?"

Mai spun around and regretted it, landing ungracefully on her posterior as Katara appeared from the riverside. Moonlight sparkled off the drops of water on her skin, lighting up the smile on her face with a gentle glow. Clad only in her white wrappings, Mai though she looked like some river nymph of old.

"No," she admitted slowly. "I... I was looking for you."

Instantly, Katara was moving forwards and Mai had to resist the urge to scramble back. "You were looking for me?" the waterbender demanded. "Is everything all right? Are _you_ all right?"

Something in Mai's face stopped her before the threshold of the tent. Hesitating, Katara dropped her hands and bit her lip against the intensity of it. The shadows draped themselves across the noblewoman's face now, casting her golden eyes in darkness, and before the waterbender could react, the question between them spoke.

"What are you doing here?"

The words came out as abruptly as cracking ice. Mai hesitated, torn between regret and defiance as the silence stretched between them. What was she thinking, questioning her like that? This wasn't Zuko or Shen Li, this wasn't someone she knew. Then again, this wasn't a court lady either. Mai swallowed, still conflicted, and then lifted her chin. Whatever. She couldn't take it back now. All she could do was wait...

And then Katara slowly expelled a long sigh and lowered herself down onto the grass, sitting cross-legged as she faced the girl in her tent.

"Good question," the waterbender said quietly. And then she sighed again, a long, drawn out exhalation as if she'd been holding her breath for the past year, and got herself comfortable.

"Well, you see... after everything that happened on the day of the Comet, I guess I was a bit confused. The whole past year I've been wrapped up in Aang's destiny, and now that I was free of it, I guess I just..."

Mai cut in. "I didn't ask for your life story. I asked what you were doing here."

Surprise, and then hurt blossomed in Katara's eyes. "Oh, I'm sorry. I thought you meant that..."

"Just tell me what you're doing here."

It was as if she couldn't stop herself. The hard, businesslike words rose sharp and cutting through the air, and Mai felt them pass as naturally past her lips as breath. But still, when Katara's expression turned suspicious, Mai wondered whether her discomfort stemmed from caring about her words or from caring about their effect on her companion.

"I'm helping people. How about you? The last I heard of you, you were at the Boiling Rock." Katara folded her arms. "That doesn't explain how I found you half-dead in this river."

Mai couldn't help but allow a rare smile to quirk the corner of her lips. Suddenly, she felt at ease again, for perhaps the first time since she'd awoken. Suspicion was something she could handle.

"I asked first," Mai pointed out, dry mirth collecting in the shadow of her smile. "I'm afraid 'I'm helping people' doesn't give me nearly enough information."

Katara didn't appear to notice the miracle she was witnessing. "What's it to you?"

The challenge passed between them like an electric spark, and Mai lost the smile as quickly as it had come. Silently, knowingly, the girls entered into a battle of wills against themselves and each other. The look in the other's eyes made Mai frown. Perhaps she was overdoing it. Perhaps... perhaps she was wrong. After all, if there was anything she knew about Katara, the girl was loyal. She'd heard as much from everyone else. And since Zuko had so clearly joined and been accepted by the Avatar's group, perhaps...

It was not a succumbing or a surrender, it was a calculated change in tactic.

"How long have you been gone for?"

It worked. Katara blinked and pulled back, surprise overcoming her stubbornness. "Uh, around five days. Why?"

Mai's look became assessing. "You've missed a lot," she told the waterbender bluntly. "Zuko freed Ty Lee and I from prison to attend his coronation. Someone tried to kill him there, and there've been reports..."

"Wait. Stop. Someone tried to kill Zuko?"

Even if Mai hadn't already noted Katara's propensity to wear her heart on her sleeve, the intensity she was faced with now said it all. Katara's beautiful blue eyes narrowed to slits, and there was a flush of anger on her dusky skin. The girl's lithe form seemed to grow, lines of protective strength sculpting themselves along her muscles. Mai noted the change with interest.

"Yes. Shen Li and I stopped him."

Katara let out a staggered breath. "I see," she said. "I... sorry. Continue."

Filing away the waterbender's reaction for later analysis, Mai continued with her story, leaving the more personal parts out until she finished with the earthbender attack that had tossed her into the river. Katara digested it all with remarkable poise, nodding as she pieced everything together.

"Those refugees must be from the same villages I've been attempting to save... but why? Why are Fire Nation soldiers attacking their own country? It makes no sense."

Mai thinned her lips in disagreement. "It makes plenty of sense. To many, Zuko is not a popular leader. What better way to unseat a Fire Lord than to make his own people revolt?"

"Aargh!" Katara spun around and stomped back to the river, stopping inches away from it with her fists clenched as she tried to contain her anger. "This is so _stupid_. I mean, what was the point of even ending the war if people just try to start if up again?"

The noblewoman frowned. "That's not the way some people see it. Some people think that the only rightful way to end the war was in triumph."

"Well those people are insane!"

Mai felt the implication sizzle itself across her skin, and flushed. Katara didn't notice. "Can't they see it's better like this? How can anyone justify sending thousands of people to die for some sick vision of triumph? I mean, the four nations were _meant_ to live in balance. Messing with that is just the most moronic thing that I have ever..."

Suddenly, Katara stopped mid-tirade, cocking her head to the side as if she were listening to something. And then she crouched sideways down to the water, dipping her fingers in slowly as if she were caressing its face. An assessing expression crept onto her brow, as if she were concentrating on some living voice within the river. And she frowned.

Mai recognised the look from the day before. "Another attack?"

Katara's lips thinned. "Yes," she said abruptly, standing up and moving back towards the bag where she kept her clothes. "I have to go."

For some reason, it was the purpose with which she said it which drained the atmosphere of the last of the tension that had bound them together for so long. Instead, the void was replaced with a new tension, the acknowledgement of a shared goal, and it was that which made the fire in Mai stir and speak.

"Let me come with you," she said.

Katara froze. For a moment, Mai could see their history in her eyes, the blue depths rippling into a mirror of the past. She saw blades flying through the air, saw herself following, saw frustration and defeat follow. She saw a conjured prison, saw the faces of family, saw the face of Zuko. And then the pool of memory shimmered into opacity, and she saw herself as she was now; weakened, determined, alone.

Katara took a second to weigh it all up and then nodded. "We need to hurry."

Mai nodded back and pushed herself to her feet. Outside she stayed emotionless. Inside she was re-evaluating everything she had ever accepted.

Well... perhaps she was not alone.

* * *

Three men sat around a blocky stone table. One armoured, one cloaked, one robed.

"Any time you want it, Chief," the armoured one said sardonically. "Three men. Fresh load of poison from our friend in Ba Sing Se. The little _prince_ won't know what hit him."

The cloaked man smiled. It wasn't a pleasant one. "I can arrange it so he'll be standing away. No interference; they can get him in the back this time like he deserves."

Fire crackled in the stone hearth, and the robed man interlinked his fingers. "No," he decided firmly. "The Avatar's fate is not negotiable, but I think the circumstances in the Fire Nation have called for a... change of plans."

The cloaked one started rebelliously. "Change? What kind of change allows both our plan and the traitor to live?"

The robed man said nothing. "The clever kind," the armoured man snorted, eyes assessing the other's peaceful expression. "What are you thinking, Chief?"

Taken on invitation, the robed man responded easily. "Ah, well, I haven't quite ironed out the details yet. But when I have, rest assured that I will tell you."

The cloaked man snorted in disbelief. "You're a fool to trust a traitor. Whatever it is, it'll never work."

The robed man lifted his shoulders in a dignified shrug. "Perhaps. If it fails, we can always revert to the poison. Either way, we shall prevail."

The armoured man grinned at that - a sharp, wolf-lion grin that showed his canines and his teeth. "To triumph, then."

The cloaked man grunted and raised his own glass. "To the war."

The robed man smiled. "To us, my friends. To Sozin's Guard."

* * *

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A/N II: Phew, and that's finally up... I'd like to apologise for being one day late. I got myself into a bit of a funk this week, doubting myself, my writing abilities and my plotting skills, and as a result I was a little de-motivated when it came to finishing this. Rest assured that my state has nothing to do with all you wonderful reviewers, however! In fact, if it hadn't been for you, this probably would have come out much, much later.

So thank you all for your patience, and I hope you all enjoyed. Please do R&R. :)


	19. Draw

**Chapter 19: Draw**

Disclaimer: Not mine, don't sue.

A/N: Thanks to MoonClaimed, J. Idanian, JFAPOI, and ristakay for your feedback this last week. You helped me get a move on to planning the rest of the story as opposed to just churning out chapter after chapter and praying. :)

And thanks to the rest of you for still reading. I don't think I've ever poured so much time and energy into a writing project, and it is an honour to share this with you.

I hope you all continue to enjoy the process as much as I am.

* * *

_Draw a match,_

_Draw a story,_

_And fit the world to it._

_Soon you'll find,_

_It speaks more,_

_Of the person who drew it._

_

* * *

  
_

It was barely light. The moon still bobbed peacefully in the sky, the stars twinkling faintly beside it. At the edge of the horizon, a sliver of sun sent streaks of golds and oranges through the clouds. The two celestial orbs hung silently over the city, distant guardians overseeing both the sleeping and the awake.

Even at this time, the palace staff were already busy in preparation for a new day. Servants milled in and out of the grounds, preparing breakfast, lighting fires, carrying messages. It was only out here, in the expanse of the training grounds, that the Fire Lord could feel some stillness. Zuko stood alone in the centre of the yard, closing his eyes against the closest scattering of his guards thirty feet away. He treasured this moment of his day. It was the only time he could get any peace. The only time he allowed himself to forget.

Zuko breathed in and then out, feeling the warm golden glow of his strength respond from deep within him. As it shifted, he moved with it; slow and methodical at first, and then building up to sweeping and graceful as he shattered the air with his flame. Behind him, his blank-faced guards said nothing. But whether he knew it or not, rumours were beginning to build that this was not a Fire Lord to be messed with personally.

Zuko completed his series of kicks, and then turned around sharply to begin working on his arms. Punch after punch blistered from his body, the fire of life exulting as it flowed from his core. With each blow he meditated, clearing his mind of nothing but the purity of flame. The long hours spent with old men he didn't trust faded. He deliberately pushed away the economic worries, the refugees, the prisoners of war, the nations' hatred. He even granted himself a moment to stop being worried about his friends; how Mai and Shen Li were doing in the Weiji province, how Toph and Aang were going in Ba Sing Se, how Sokka and Suki were preparing for the North Pole, how Katara was surviving only Agni-knows-where. All of it he cleared from him mind, leaving the essence of himself and his power paramount in his thoughts.

He was Zuko, Fire Lord Zuko. He carried both good and evil in him, and he finally had the strength and awareness to make the choice to do good. It was like a mantra within him, repeating second after second as he loosed a wave of fire, sending it arcing up towards the sky before splitting it into tongues. It was his promise to himself, that no matter how ill at ease he was with his Ministers of War/Defense and Security or how helpless he felt against the problems devouring his country and the nations' hate, that he would still be himself and never give up. It was his prayer, and the only thing keeping him sane even as he felt his grip slipping.

Zuko closed his eyes and felt premature lines cross his face. Even in the height of his power and meditation, the niggling thought that there was no way he could do this alone preyed on his mind. Zuko dropped to the ground and delivered a scissor kick, the same one that had brought his sister down. It had taken two to finish that fight, and as he faced an even bigger battle with seemingly no end, he couldn't help but think...

Engrossed in his suddenly skewed thoughts, Zuko didn't even notice that he had an extra audience member until he stopped to check his stance. Sweat dripped down in to his eyes, and as he wiped it away, he saw an old woman standing before him, two of his guards hanging uncertainly at her shoulders. Zuko started as he reocgnised her. In truth, it should have been more difficult. After all, she and her sister looked very much alike. But even the most unobservant dolt could see the difference between blind hatred and weariness, and so Zuko steeled himself.

"Lady Kata?" he bobbed his head respectfully. "What brings you here?"

The fact that he'd remembered her name was her first surprise, but she didn't show it. The second was the civility of his tone. She blinked. She'd just spent ten minutes staring with mixed hatred and awe as he'd blasted off concentrated strike after concentrated strike of the element she loathed the most. The roar had seemed so ferocious, so devouring and hideous to her that the manners of its wielder were like a slap in the face.

Kata swallowed and tried to get back on track. "The ship to the Northern Water Tribes leaves today," she managed to blurt out.

That was all she said, but the Fire Lord nodded again in acknowledgement. "I will be down at the docks this afternoon to see you off," he said calmly. "I hope that you';; have a good journey."

Again. The... civility. From someone she'd always thought would be a barbarian, it was almost frightening. Kata narrowed her eyes, trying to find any trace of sarcasm of ill-wishing... or anything else that might point to his evil. But it was hard. The only break in the Fire Lord's composure was the fact that he was panting lightly, his upper body covered in a sheen of sweat. Clad only in training pants, he looked so much younger than she remembered seeing him. Then, at the coronation and at the dinner, his formal robes had lent him years that he did not have, and he'd borne it so naturally she'd assumed...

Then again, Kama had mentioned that she'd spotted his youth right away. And now, as Kata saw him, she had to admit that her sister had been right. He _was_ young. Probably not even in his twenties. In fact, as he stood before her, there was little to distinguish him from the boy she trusted, Sokka.

Well, except for the fact that he was the Fire Lord and a firebender.

Kata's brow furrowed. She'd been standing here for a while now, watching as fire cut through the air and burst into stars. And she'd remembered that before her time in prison had led to fire meaning death and pain, it had meant life too...

Angrily, Kata pushed the thoughts away. Ruminating on the nature of fire was _not_ why she was here. After all, all she wanted to do was get out of here, to survive. Once she got away from this spirits-forsaken place, she never wanted to think about the Fire Nation again.

Of course, there was one problem with that.

"My sister still wants to stay here," she said abruptly, glaring at him as if it were his fault. "She wants to meet the Avatar's waterbender."

Something unreadable flickered across the Fire Lord's eyes at that, and she watched him eagerly, waiting to see the mask fall and find proof of the monster within. Then, _then_ Kama would surely listen to her and abandon her wretched plan...

_Then, maybe, she could find someone to unleash her hatred against..._

But as quickly as it had come, the flicker went, and the Fire Lord relaxed. "Her name is Katara," he said quietly, the emphasis in his voice both unmistakable and confusing. But before Kata could try to figure out what it meant, his eyes lifted and seemed to stare straight into her soul. "And I promise I will look after your sister until she returns."

Strangely enough, it was that which set her off. The sheer arrogance and meaninglessness of it all hit her, and it was as if lightning had arced up her spine. "You promise, do you?" Kata hissed. "Hah! A firebender's promise is as worthless as spit! I swear, Fire Lord, you might have fooled my sister, but you haven't fooled me! If a hair on her head is hurt..."

Too late, she remembered the guards behind her, and as their hands closed over her arms she screamed. It was as instinctive as it was visceral - thirty years of pain and horror tearing through her mind like a tsunami and leaving nothing left. She screamed and screamed, the sound ripping her own heart in two, and it was only when the fingers abruptly loosened and the guards stepped back that she stopped.

Shivering, Kata realised somehow that she'd dropped to the ground and curled herself into a ball. Her back jutted out, the curves of her spine still clearly visible beneath her skin and the cloth pulled tight against them. She shuddered at the familiarity of the pose, the one that protected most of her internal organs as they kicked...

Dimly, she realised that the Fire Lord was kneeling before her. His look was indescribable. His face was blank, but inside his eyes, something was raging, and she shied away from it as she remembered with hatred and bitterness that even though she was 'free', she was as powerless as ever, and it was all his fault, the Fire Lord's fault...

He spoke.

"What my father and grandfather did to you was horrendous," he said quietly. "It was an abomination. I can't repeat how sorry I am, because otherwise we'd be here forever."

The words loosened around her ears and she stared at him blankly. He reached up to touch his scar, and for the first time, so close up, she realised how deep it went.

He was speaking again. She tried to focus on something else, anything else besides the lies spilling from his hated throat. He was the Fire Lord. She had to remember that. He was not an innocent boy, but the Fire Lord.

"But I am not my father. And I do promise to you that your sister will be safe as long as she chooses to remain here."

For a moment, she focused on his eyes. They were deep and metallic, gold and multi-hued with sorrow. And for that moment, she wanted to believe him...

And then she remembered that of all the nations, only Fire Nation had golden eyes. Her focus frosted over again and Kata began to struggle. torn between pushing herself upwards to her feet and leaping out at him. But then suddenly, both urges halted as a new voice cut into the scene.

"Zuko! Zuko, I have to talk with you!"

Both the Fire Lord and the waterbender jerked up, just in time to see a pink blur cartwheel itself across the training square. Kata gaped, turning to the Fire Lord for some indication of who this was. But all she saw was his shoulders soften as he rose.

"Ty Lee? What are you doing here?"

The girl executed a twist and skidded to her feet less than a meter away. Kata couldn't believe her eyes. Every movement this girl made seemed like some sort of choreographed dance. She'd never seen such inhuman grace.

And then the girl opened her mouth, and the fact that the package came with such a bright cheery voice jarred Kata's ears. "Sorry to disturb you during training! But I just thought that this was too important to be delayed long, and oh..."

Ty Lee started, as if she'd suddenly noticed that the Fire Lord was not alone. Kata resisted the urge to lash out or shrink away as the bright, wide eyes turned on her. "Oh! You must be one of the Southern waterbenders I've been hearing about!"

Kata dumbly nodded, feeling as if the world was very, very strange. Less than a week ago, she'd never dreamed that she'd talk to the Fire Lord without it ending in his slow and painful disembowelment, and the term 'Fire Nation' brought with it only the image of a hateful guard, brown eyes cruel and slanted as he dealt his abuse.

But now... before Kata could even comprehend it, she was caught up in a brief but heartfelt embrace. And then, just as quickly, the acrobat danced backwards as she smiled. It was blinding.

"Wow, I'm so happy that you're out! I mean, I was in prison for two weeks and that was terrible... but you..." her grey eyes were wide and sad at the same time. "You must be ecstatic!"

The whirlwind of words floated past Kata's ears, just as her muscles tensed instinctively to push the Fire Nation girl away from her. But of course, her muscles were met with thin air, and Kata blinked as her mind finally caught up with everything.

"Ecstatic," she echoed hollowly. She felt somehow dry and empty next to this girl, as if Ty Lee's smile was bright enough to outshine every fibre of her being. She stepped back, but Ty Lee had already taken her words for an answer, beamed brilliantly, and then turned back to Zuko as he cleared his throat.

"So what's this all important news?" he asked. "I haven't seen you look so jumpy for a while."

Ty Lee's smile suddenly faded, and it was as if the sun had ducked behind a cloud. "Well, you know, as your Public Relations Officer, I've been getting a few invitations from noble families as well as some of the Nation's organisations to join them at these social gatherings. You know, to be your spokesperson and mingle and stuff." A look crossed her face, as if she'd suddenly thought of something. "You _do_ know that, right?"

The years in prison had been long enough for Kata to craft the perfect image of the Fire Lord in her mind. He was tyrannical, monstrous, and above all cruel to everyone, even his own. Any rebellion or insubordination would be met with harsh retribution.

Zuko simply rolled his eyes and huffed good-naturedly. "Of course I know that. Why?"

Ty Lee chewed her bottom lip nervously. "We-ell... it's because General Hang invited me to lunch today. With his family."

Zuko drew a quick breath. "The Minister for War.... uh, I mean Defense? What does _he_ want?"

"I don't know," Ty Lee shrugged helplessly. "I'm surprised too... in all my time at court I've never heard of that guy inviting anyone like this with such short notice. All I know is he wants an answer as soon as possible... so I thought I might check with you first. Is there anything that's been going on with your Ministers I should know about?"

The words sounded innocent, but her tone belied a greater understanding than her face did. Ty Lee had grown up at court. More importantly, she had grown up as Azula's friend. And no sunny, carefree disposition could ever wipe away the resulting development of a finely honed survival instinct.

Zuko caught the connotations too, and frowned. Kata noted that it made him look older than he really was. "What's _not_ going on?" he mused, a hint of bitterness in his voice. "At the moment, I'd fire the lot of them just for safety's sake if it wasn't for the fact that that'd bring the nobility down around my ears. I'm only just beginning to get who I can trust. And Hang is _not_ one of them. He's been nothing but recalcitrant to the point of insolence recently." Zuko look grew reflective. "But the damn viper steps to the limits with me. So to have him invite you... he must want something."

Ty Lee swallowed. "Should I not go, then?" she asked. "I mean, it wouldn't be good to give him what he wants, right?"

Zuko paused for a moment, as if contemplating the matter. And then he shook his head decisively.

"No, you should go," he said firmly. "If Hang wants something, then I want to know what it is. There's no hard evidence that he or any of the others are planning anything, but you might be able to get somethimg out of him."

Ty Lee smiled nervously. "I don't know... he's always been pretty standoffish." The acrobat tilted her head, sifting through memories. "And come to think of it, kind of creepy."

At the unspoken fear in her eyes, Zuko shifted imperceptibly, his stance turning from businesslike to familiar. He didn't blame her. General Hang was infamous. "You don't have to if you don't want to," he said carefully. Even Kata could see the sincerity in his eyes. "Say you're busy or something. I can always try to catch him out at our meetings. If he is planning something, the fox is bound to slip up sometime."

The false conviction in his voice rang hollow in the air, jarring everyone within hearing range. Zuko winced at himself. Ty Lee said nothing. Then her gaze dropped, and she sighed. "This is important to you, isn't it?"

Zuko turned away, slightly ashamed. "Yes," he admitted. "But as I said..."

She swallowed and cut him off. "I'll do it," she bobbed her head and tried to smile. "I mean hey, that's what I'm here for, right? To be all public relation-y?"

Zuko couldn't help but smile himself. It was thin and strained, but faced with such unexpected loyalty... "And you're very good at it," he said truthfully. "Much better than me."

Ty Lee brightened a little. "I am at that, aren't I?" she commented, without a hint of self-consciousness. "Hey... maybe I'll even get him to lighten up a little! It'd be nice to see a colour in his aura besides, like, dirty grey."

"If you can manage to do that," Zuko said dryly. "I'll officially promote you to Public Miracle Worker."

Ty Lee's face grew serious again at that. "I'll try, Zuko," she promised honestly. "I will."

It was funny - only now, when her going was set in stone, did the worry begin to wash over him. Zuko thought of his sharp-faced Minister and his insides clenched. "Be careful," he warned her. "You're right, Hang is creepy. At the very least, I can imagine him taking pleasure in putting you in a hard position."

Ty Lee's eyes dimmed a little, but her chin lifted. "I will," she repeated again. "Thanks."

Zuko watched as she cartwheeled away, too engrossed in his thoughts to notice that somewhere along the way, his other companion had vanished. Because Ty Lee was right in more ways than one. Hang's sudden invitation was suspicious, and the speed of it made him uncomfortable. For one, it just wasn't Court protocol to give less than a day's notice. And the Minister of War himself wasn't known to be too sociable...

Zuko shook his head. First Mai and Shen Li to the Weiji province, where five trained scouts had already disappeared, and now Ty Lee to the hospitality of General Hang. If he didn't know himself better, he'd think that he was deliberately trying to get his friends killed.

* * *

Ty Lee was nervous.

Not that it showed. No... she could feel the smile stretched tightly over her face, externally lighting up her eyes. It was only in her aura that she could feel things changing. A dark muddy blue danced around her head with violent swirls, matched only by a cloudy grey collecting near the tips of her ears. She shuddered and tried to will herself pinker.

"More mussels, my Lady?"

Ty Lee resisted the urge to squirm. "Please, just call me Ty Lee."

Hang smiled. "Of course."

Ty Lee shuddered inwardly. She recognised that smile. It reminded her of one of Azula's smiles, before she pounced. Not that she'd minded at the time, but now in retrospect...

Azula had been a good friend. Or so Ty Lee had thought. Sure, she knew that when the push came to shove, Azula would always get her own way. But Ty Lee didn't mind so much when she knew that the older girl would be there with her fun schemes and wicked smile. And Ty Lee had been content to pledge her loyalty to that, to have such _fun_ running around with her two friends once more. It had been like the Academy all over again, only this time with boys. And through it all, she'd known that Azula _needed_ her and Mai. Needed _her_. Not anyone else, not any of her sisters, but _her_.

And then Azula had turned on Mai...

Ty Lee stiffened, ran away from the memories, and forced her attention back to her host. He was still smiling as he looked at her, and it looked as unnatural on his angular face as his court robes did on his body. She'd never seen him in anything but his armour or the nobleman's breeches and tunic. She quickly filed away the oddity in her mind. Perhaps he was trying to make some subtle statement?

"So, Ty Lee, how are you enjoying work as the Fire Lord's Public Relations Officer?"

Or perhaps not so subtle. Ty Lee smiled, lifted her fork up to her mouth, and chewed. At least, knowing that Hang's wife and children were eating silently from the same plates reassured her that the food wasn't poisoned. Not that she could see any reason for him to do so... perhaps she was being paranoid.

"Oh it's great," she enthused honestly. "I get to talk to lots of people and have fun. Zuko's even allowed me to have free run across the palace. And you wouldn't believe how much more fun some of the balustrades are than the tightrope some of the balustrades!"

He kept smiling. "That sounds wonderful. I'm glad to hear that you're enjoying it..."

"Mmhn," Ty Lee chewed another mussel down, feeling the pleasant burn of chilli as it slid down her throat. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad at all. She could do small talk. Small talk and really nice food.

"... and the Fire Lord is lucky to have such a loyal servant. How did that come about, by the way? The last I heard you were one of Princess Azula's most trusted friends."

Ty Lee froze. His smile hadn't faltered, and now as she looked closer, she could see that the cold steel in his eyes hadn't faltered either. Spirits, this was not looking good...

And then she was saved. Hang's wife stirred from where she was sitting further down the table, the consummate picture of the demure politician's wife. "Come now, dear," she chided gently. For some reason, the words sounded vaguely rehearsed. "We shouldn't talk of such things over lunch!"

Ty Lee held her breath as an inscrutable look flickered over Hang's face. For a moment, she wasn't sure whether he was going to ignore his wife or something worse, but then he relaxed.

"I'm sorry, dear. I forgot myself for a moment," he turned back to her and smiled again. Ty Lee didn't feel reassured. "Well, in that case, how about your other friend? Lady Mai. I haven't seen her around for a few days. In fact, I've barely seen her since your return."

Ty Lee didn't hesitate. "Oh, Mai's gone off on a trip. I guess she wanted to see more of the Fire Nation after being stuck in the Earth Kingdom so long, and then..."

Hang interrupted. "That's funny," he commented. "I seem to remember her being particularly close with Prince Zuko..."

His eyes latched onto hers like a shark's. "And with her coming back but then leaving again so suddenly... is everything all right?"

Ty Lee couldn't think. Zuko and Mai's break-up had been private after all. Then again, neither of them had told her not to tell, and surely Hang couldn't wring anything nefariously useful from such knowledge...

Heck, at this moment she was willing to tell him anything that wasn't obviously sensitive as long as it got him off her back. "Well, actually, they're not really together anymore," Ty Lee said uneasily, hoping she wasn't making some huge mistake. "In fact..."

Again, he cut her off, now with a distinctive gleam in her eyes. "You mean the Fire Lord is now single?"

Ty Lee squirmed. Why this consummate politician was latching onto _that_, she wasn't sure. But now he was looking at her with an indecipherable look in his eyes, a look that made her feel distinctively uncomfortable.

But at least one thing was for certain. She wasn't looking forwards to relaying this back to Zuko. Or Mai, for that matter. Silently, Ty Lee breathed, steeled herself for the rest of lunch, and hoped that her friend was having a better time.

* * *

Mai was running.

She veered left, heard the crashing behind her, and cursed as she ducked nimbly back to the right again... just in time to avoid another arrow. The movement jostled the load across her shoulder, and she heard a faint moan. But there was no time to fix it. Mai kept running, the harsh pants splitting her throat the only sign of her exertion.

The forest thickened ahead of her. She used it to leap from cover to cover, eyes always scanning ahead for a hiding place. Behind her, she heard the shrill keen of yet another arrow. Mai cursed and fell to her knees... just in time. The shaft whistled past her head and thunked ominously into a tree inches from her scalp, its deadly point quivering inches deep into the wood.

For a moment, she wanted to stay there. The waterbender got heavier with each step, and she had been running now for nearly ten minutes. Harsh breaths knifed into her lungs and Mai looked into the undergrowth ahead. What she would do for Shen Li's wires now...

The crunch of footsteps grew louder, the dim yells of pursuit amplifying in her ear. Mai was suddenly glad for the years of relentless training and drills at the academy, especially for one such as her. Getting back onto her feet was the hardest thing she'd ever done, but she did it with only one hand steadied on the trunk in front of her.

And then she was running again, glad for her strength. The ground dipped unevenly between her feet now, the dirt hidden by layers of leaves and sticks. Mai could hear the commotion still behind her as those same leaves and sticks were rent apart by armoured feet. She gritted her teeth. The army too had drills and training... even the rebel factions, it seemed. That was the only explanation for how they could still be following her when they were weighed down, some by over twenty pounds of armour.

Then again, she was weighed down by over twenty pounds of waterbender. Mai ducked sharply to the left to avoid another missile, and heard a faint cry in response yet again. Mai had to shake her head in respect. She was still conscious. Mai felt another fresh surge of sticky wetness flood her robe at her shoulder, and she wondered how long for.

"The... the river..."

Given the crashing of their pursuers, the crackle of the undergrowth and the sound of her own heartbeat throbbing in her ears, Mai was surprised she had heard it. It was soft against the other sounds, soft and weak as its owner bled. Then she realised that the waterbender had managed to prop herself up, curving around to get as close to her carrier's ear as possible. Mai shook her head again.

"What?" she rasped.

Katara stirred faintly again, lurching drunkenly on the noblewoman's shoulder. "Get... get us to the river."

After everything she had seen, Mai knew she should not have doubted. And yet she did, even as her feet turned eastward. Noting the change, Katara slumped back down again and held on, fighting back unconsciousness as the blood boiled around her head and back.

And Mai kept running.

The sound of their pursuers was fainter now. Whether that was because she'd changed direction or because they were tiring, Mai didn't know, but she also didn't particularly care. In her exhaustion, she focused only on moving her legs in front of the other, ignoring the knives scraping her lungs, and not dropping her burden. Both dead branches and living blurred past them as she kept running, and soon the distant sound of the river joined the crashing of the soldiers and the beating of her heart.

Mai could have wept. _Almost there, almost there._ But she didn't. She wouldn't; not for exhaustion, not for pain, not for relief. Another arrow sounded and it was with a strangled cry that she managed to throw them both out of the way. She stumbled on the landing, almost falling, but kept going.

_This is how it feels to run._

The forest was thinning. The rush of the river was increasing. And so was the sticky flow seeping down her back.

_This is how it feels to run for your life._

Briefly, Mai wondered whether this was how the waterbender and her companions had felt all of the previous year. She decided that since they'd so often stood and fought, perhaps not. And yet it was more than just the strain of the running and the taste of defeat. Mai felt fear rear up inside her, deep, instinctual fear that overwhelmed her sense and made her heartbeat run as fast as her legs.

It was exhilarating, exhausting, terrifying. Mai felt every inch of her screaming. Alive. The sound of the river came closer. So did the sound of their pursuers. Mai wanted to weep but couldn't.

_Almost there..._

And then they were. The trees thinned out almost to vanish. Mai stumbled forwards onto grass, the river licking the edges of the earth less than three metres away. The sight of it was enough to finish her. Mai collapsed, spent beyond belief. She had used up everything she had and more; the oxygen in her muscles, the energy in her bloodstream, an inner strength she had forgotten she owned. It was with the last vestiges of heart she did not have that she lowered Katara gently to the ground.

And then she fell, properly, into place. The waterbender sprawled before the river like an offering, the noblewoman on her knees between her companion and the forest. But it was a futile arrangement of protection. Mai barely balanced on her hand, her fingers digging deep into the dirt. The other wavered in front of her, her remaining senbon at the ready. She'd lost so many during her near-drowning, and then again saving Katara's life as the waterbender fell into the water. Even so, the ones she clasped were now just a gesture of defiance. Mai knew she didn't have the strength to throw them. Not now. Her body buzzed with exhaustion, felt alive with pain and wracking gasps as the reality of her flight settled into her muscles. She could barely remain upright, let alone fight for their lives...

The crashing grew louder.

Exhaustion pushed spots into her eyes. Mai swayed, her left hand clawing deeper into the soft earth leading down to the riverbank. She was amazed at how much she could _feel_, in these last moments of her life. Anger at Katara for getting hurt. Respect for Katara at how she'd fought, fuelled by her care and compassion. Anger at herself for not seeing that the enemy was prepared. Amazement at herself for how she'd moved; how she'd dived into the river, pulled the bleeding waterbender to the surface and onto her shoulder, and then run.

The crashing grew louder. Their pursuers were almost upon them. Mai screwed her eyes shut.

Anger at her countrymen for whatever they were doing. Anger that they had tried to kill Zuko and Shen Li... and were about to kill her. A mix of anger and relief that she now cared.

It felt good to care about something...

And then they were there. Mai opened her eyes and saw five of them burst from the trees. She smiled a knife-like smile, one that penetrated into minds and left them bleeding. A clean-up squad. That was all they were. A clean-up squad from someone who would normally be underestimating them, but now, as they were...

Agni, who was she kidding? If the insurgents had sent one man, that likely would have been enough to finish the job. She felt her muscles beneath her, tried to pull her arm up and at least take one of them with her. The sound of their feet and their cruelty knifed her ears. Her heartbeat was still throbbing, her gasps for breath still coming fast and thick. And behind her, the sound of the river...

The sound of the river was increasing.

Mai watched in shock as time froze, and the bloodlust on the insurgents' faces was replaced by terror. She felt coldness creep over her, realised that the sun had been stolen away by an unnatural shadow looming over her head. She was too tired to even turn, but when a massive whip-like wave defied gravity to curl around all five soldiers, it all became clear.

There was a start. A jerk. A scream. And then the water jolted backwards like a catapult, throwing its prey deep into the fast-flowing river. The current carried them away, muffling their splutters.

And everything around her went quiet.

Mai felt the rush of blood within her, heard the pumping of her heart still throbbing in her ears. Her body was still preparing itself for death, and her mind was still shocked. She pushed herself upwards to turn, slowly, just in time to see the waterbender crash to the ground from where she'd been standing, holding the river up by her shaky arms.

Her respect grew. And then all other thoughts were wiped clean as she saw the arrow still buried deep in Katara's back, the shaft brought vertical by her collapse. Blood soaked the purple robes gathered there, and the sight was enough to get her moving again.

Mai crawled forwards, pushing her senbon back into their holders so she could use both hands. With strength she did not have, she gathered Katara underneath her shoulders. The waterbender's normally dusky face was pale underneath the dirty gauze, her eyes slack and gone. Mai mentally shied back at the sight. She was _not_ dead. Not after everything...

Still. Her eyes were drawn to the blood at her knees, and her other senses to the sticky liquid blossoming down her own back and shoulders from the run. Mai was no expert on field medicine, but she had a sinking feeling that it would take a miracle.

Then again, the fact that she herself was still breathing a day ago was also a miracle. Impossibly, an idea gleamed into her mind. Mai fell sideways, dragging the other girl with her. She let go and somehow pushed herself up again. Now that Katara was lying in the right position, Mai crawled around to her other side and began to pull. The waterbender's cloth and skin seemed to work with her, pushing and pulling them inch by grievous inch down to the river. When they reached the bank, Mai gave one last yank and Katara's lifeless body slid down the mud until she was submerged all the way up to her back.

And then Mai ripped the arrow out and prayed.

At first, she thought it had failed. The blood rushed out to the surface, coming in trails so thick they hung suspended in the water like a crimson cloud before being whisked away by the current. Katara jerked and cried out. Mai's hand darted down unconsciously to grasp the girl's uninjured shoulder. The blood poured out. Mai cursed the insurgents, cursed their preparation, and wondered how they had figured out the spirit was human.

And that was when the glow began.

It was dim at first, barely noticeable under the blue rush of the river. But then it grew, and the blood trails began to lessen. Mai saw it blossom through hazy eyes and unconsciously she smiled. A real one. She no longer doubted.

And as she watched, the deep, grievous wound began to heal. The blue glow dipped into the flesh, knitting it back together with tendrils of water and love. How Katara was managing to heal herself while unconscious she wasn't quite sure, but Mai was beginning to suspect that the waterbender was truly unique. Unique and powerful. In the unguarded recesses of her mind, a place that was barely conscious and whose walls had been worn down by exhaustion and fear, Mai wondered how she kept finding these friends.

That thought was lost as she looked down again. The skin was near flawless now, unmarked except for a tiny, puckered blotch. Mai could have wept in relief, but she didn't. She wasn't that kind of person. She settled for realising that she was smiling, and increasing it infinitesimally. Her heartbeat slowed. Her breathing dilated, her gasps no longer rending the air. And then nothing but the river filled her ears, the sweet, rushing river that could deal both death and life in one blow.

How long they stayed there like that, she didn't know. All that mattered to her was that they were safe now, that they'd made it out. Mai felt herself still as the spectre of death was slowly carried away by the river, the same river which had almost drowned her a day before.

She'd made it. They'd made it. She was about to finally let herself relax when she heard it.

Far off in the distance, but travelling unerringly closer, came the sound of claws and armour. Mai froze. Although the blood was slowly returning to her cheeks, Katara was still unconscious beside her. There would be no help from that quarter. And as she looked down at herself, extended her senses past her trembling muscles and into her failing heart, she breathed.

Silently cursing the irony of life, Mai readied her last senbon.

* * *


	20. The Threads that Bind

**Chapter 20: The Threads That Bind**

Disclaimer: Not mine, don't sue.

A/N I: Thanks so much again to my lovely reviewers. You help me keep my head above water. :).

.

* * *

Scorn the distance, scorn past hurts,

The threads that bind are those that keep,

So try to hide, to run, avert,

The wind finds all it tries to seek.

* * *

Wind trailed its languid fingers in her hair. Somewhere along the way, while she'd been running for their lives, it had come a little loose. Mai didn't have the strength to reach behind and pull it back. Not to mention she didn't have the hands...

The sound of claws drew closer, and then stopped. The change made the senbon feel heavier in her fingers, like drops of blood waiting to spring. Mai gripped the grass below her, feeling a strange calm pass through her. She didn't want to die. Not now. And although death looked as if it were becoming a definite possibility, she certainly wasn't going to take it lying down.

Or alone.

She heard a faint groan behind her. She was too tired to turn around and check on its source. Nevertheless, Mai was fairly certain that this battle was her own, for obvious reasons. The memory of Katara's blood clouding before it was pulled away by the river was still too fresh, still too visceral. She shook herself free from it and concentrated again.

There. Two soft steps, almost lost amongst the creaking wood as the wind kissed the earth and ran through the trees. Mai heard the faint rustle of leaves underneath claws. Whoever they were, they were moving towards them. Softly, softly... she counted eight steps in ten seconds. Two of them, then. Mounted.

Her fingers tightened yet again. She had two senbon left. How ironic.

Mai felt her pulse in her skin, felt it humming through her veins with adrenaline. The sound of the claws had stopped. She held her breath and waited. Death was coming, and she was going to meet it with two sharp needles before she was done. That thought alone stopped anything remotely resembling fear from materialising.

There was a quiet, reptilian whicker. Like the silence before the storm. And then the trees before her seemed to burst outwards, and things suddenly happened very, very fast.

Two basilisks shot out of the undercover, scales gleaming dully in the night. Mai surged forth from her position, hands outstretched for two killing blows. The senbon left her simultaneously, the metal singing through the air. One whistled through empty space over a riderless mount. Mai didn't have time to blink as she followed the other with her eyes, watching it head unerringly to the centre of a black-clad chest...

And then it wasn't. Mai watched as her last needle flew uselessly into the distance as the man nimbly twisted away. That was it, then, she thought blankly. Now all she had left was herself. Her legs faltered beneath her. It was hard to stand. The basilisks came to a sudden halt and the single rider leapt off and closed the distance between them. One step away, he stopped as if he'd seen a ghost.

Mai took the opportunity to stumble forwards and tackle him to the ground. There was a whoosh of air as they both fell, and then her hands were drawn to his throat and she pushed with the last of her strength. He gasped and tried to pry her fingers away. Her nails bruised his flesh. His scrabbled her skin. Her arms trembled. She wasn't sure who was going to give out first. He was choking, wheezing, and she wasn't sure if he was trying to say something or if he was simply trying to breathe. Her own exertion pushed spots behind her own eyes for a moment, and then before she could react the world was twisted upside down. The masked rider threw her off, rolled over, and pinned her with his hips. His hands clenched down on her wrists before she could move.

Mai stopped, and then started again. She was breathing - long, shuddering breaths. He was gasping. Even knowing she was gone, she still struggled against him, and she could see that it was taking a surprising amount of effort to keep her down...

He stopped. He let go. She froze in shock for a second, and then leapt at the chance, reaching forth to flip him over again.

And then he ripped off his mask.

For a moment, time seemed to still. Exhaustion, adrenaline, and moonlight blinded her sight, so much that it took over a second to recognise him. But when she did, she suddenly couldn't move.

"Mai," he said, his voice croaky from strangulation. "It's _me_."

* * *

The wind ruffled Sokka's hair, tossing it this way and that as he stood at the railing of the ship. The coast was drawing further and further away, but his right hand remained slightly raised, a sombre gesture of promise and farewell. He kept it up long after the small shape of Zuko standing alone, surrounded by a half ring of guards, had disappeared.

Suki stepped lightly behind him, her arm automatically moving to steady his waist. At her touch, some part of him almost flinched, and he had to turn away when she looked at him oddly.

"Are you all right?" she asked, concern furrowing her brow. "You haven't said a word since we left. And well, knowing you, that took me by surprise."

Sokka turned back to her, studying the lines of her face and wondering how to answer. She was so... strong. It made her beautiful, in a different way to what he'd ever expected. He reached out lightly to touch her cheek, cursing himself for his stupidity when she smiled and leaned into his hand. The shame accentuated his honesty.

"I guess I'm worried," the warrior admitted.

Suki squeezed him tighter once, and then relaxed, her arm hanging loosely around his waist. "You're always worried," she said, her voice fond as her other hand came up to mirror his touch. "About things that neither of us can control. What is it this time?"

It was only the tone of her voice, that caring, loving voice, that stopped the words from cutting. It was the tone that informed his rational mind that she was teasing him, that this was another of their jokes And yet, on some level, Sokka felt them hurt. He pushed the thought away as he sank into the honey of her eyes. But his hand dropped to his waist and hung there, open and empty until her own followed and consciously interlinked.

"It's everything," he admitted lowly, shreds of shame still clinging to his stomach. "Katara. Zuko. Toph and Aang." The list felt like it incomplete for a moment, and he frowned as he searched his mind. "Oh... and us." The words flowed from his mouth faster than he could check them. "I'm not sure what waiting for us at the North Pole, but from what Zuko's said, I'm worried."

Suki raised her eyebrow, her gaze sharp and assessing. "You know, for someone who's been there before, I'm surprised. They're your sister tribe, Sokka, and from what I've heard you were there long enough to get a handle on the place. Surely you know what to expect." Her lips lifted, "After all, a warrior always remembers his battlefields."

Sokka couldn't help it. He matched her smile, and then dipped his head head down quickly to kiss her. "That's my girl," he grinned. "Brains with her brawn, that's what I love."

But as soon as he said it, he sobered again. Sokka barely caught the faint hint of dismay on Suki's face before she dropped the smile and cupped his chin in her hands. The move forced him to look back into her eyes.

The spark of laughter was gone. "Sokka. There's something you're not telling me. Something more. You've... ever since Zuko asked us to go back to the North Pole, you've been distant."

Sokka blinked. Whatever he'd feared, 'distant' certainly was what he hadn't expected. Distant. That wasn't a word he normally associated with himself. Cocky, yes. Sarcastic, yes. Meat-loving, yes... even warrior and failure made it in there sometime, depending on his circumstances. But distant?

Taking walks on his own. Training up his leg while she sat. Gazing silently out at the night sky while in bed. Sokka swallowed as he realised that that was exactly what he had been, and he winced. If only he'd opened his eyes a little more in the past few days instead of being so worried about what was going on inside himself...

To be honest, that in itself was a luxury. Or at least it had been during the last year. He had been exhausted, so exhausted with making sure everyone was safe. Of acting the big brother. Of always being the first one to step up and fight if need be, with only the security of his wits and his weapons behind him.

And as he looked at Suki now, he saw things he hadn't for the last few days. Lines. Uncertainty beneath the strength. She caught him looking and looked back. "Don't shut me out, Sokka," she said, the plea unworded, but just as strong. "Whatever it is, tell me."

_I should have told her before at Serpent's Pass_. Sokka clenched his fingers slightly. _I should have told her before the Comet. _His fingers curled. _I should have told her before. Before we were on a ship headed to where I failed and she died..._

His fist hardened, and then relaxed a little. There was nothing he could do about it now, and Sokka was nothing if not pragmatic. Unbidden, he felt his eyes drift to the sky, instinctively searching for the silver orb that haunted his dreams. It was still late afternoon, and so the brightness of the sun in its home waters burned away any chance he might have to see. But soon, very soon, he knew that he would see her, and that she would be beautiful.

The presence of a warm, physical touch started him back to earth. Sokka turned to see Suki, standing before him. To any other she might have looked no different - tall, straight and confident, a warrior's grace easily in her stance. But to Sokka, the uncertainty written in her face made her suddenly look very vulnerable. And yet... it meshed perfectly with the confidence in her, the courage. It added a strength to her strength, an inner steel that he had glimpsed only a few times.

It was reassuring. It pulled him down into her, reminded him that she was someone he didn't have to worry about unless he chose to, because she could take care of herself.

Of course, because he loved her, the choice had been made. But still, the knowledge that she stood strong in her own right beside him was enough to loosen the choke inside him.

_Whatever it is, tell me._ "It's a long story," Sokka finally said. "A long, long story."

Again, she surprised him. Instead of the expected grimness, the look of relief on her face was almost laughable. And it might have been, too, if it also hadn't given him the strong urge to kiss her senseless. She was smiling again when they came up for air, her forehead resting against his. And miraculously, Sokka felt his heart rate decrease a little, his blood pressure drop. It felt so right to hold her like this, to be close to her. It felt like going home, even on a ship to the North Pole.

"Well," she said brightly, "We've got one day around the coast until we pick up Hama, and then over a week until we hit the Northern Water Tribes. I'll say we have time."

* * *

She was getting used to the feeling of wind in her hair. Toph lolled back against the saddle and relaxed, dreamily enjoying its kiss on her cheek. Sure, she didn't have any of her sweet, precious earth below her, but at least she could also relax. No one could sneak up on them here, or at least no one she'd be able to monitor. The lift of responsibility was a relief.

Of course, there was also the slight fear of falling. Toph scrunched up her nose, remembering her first few trips on Appa. The exultation of being free from her parents had been quickly replaced by the terror of only knowing the fur she gripped, and the idea of losing even that chilled her. With nothing to catch her, and left completely blind... she was the helpless little girl she hated.

Still, enough resolution and experience on Appa had decreased that fear. She hadn't fallen, not once, and she'd even gotten to the point where she'd trusted that her friends would catch her first. And so even alone in the saddle now, her experience was enough to reduce the terror to an uncomfortable squirm of doubt that she could ignore.

When she had a distraction, anyway.

"So, Twinkletoes. Care to tell me what this trip is for?"

The bald monk started from his position on Appa. "Hmm?"

Toph rolled her eyes. Honestly, sometimes she felt like she had to repeat everything when she was around her friends. She wondered if she should save herself the trouble sometime and just say things twice the first time. "This trip. You didn't exactly explain why we were going before. Just that you needed to 'learn stuff'."

He didn't say anything. Toph felt it acutely. Up here, there was nothing but the occasional sounds of Appa's groan and the shrill cry of birds. When both were silent, she could hear nothing but clouds wisping past. And right now, with the vibes she was getting from Aang, that made her nervous.

So she babbled. "I mean, 'learn stuff' is so broad. There's _heaps_ of stuff you still have to learn. We never got that extra earthbending time in for you, and last time I checked you still can't melt swampmallows as well as Sparky can, and..."

Her own voice sounded loud in her ears, and so she took the plunge. "And... Twinkletoes? What's wrong?"

Finally, her words elicited a sigh. She felt oddly relieved. She couldn't see it, but it came from his chest, so long and drawn out that it lifted his feet. "You're right," Aang said quietly. "I do have a lot to learn."

Inexplicably, the response felt like an anticlimax. "Well, duh. So does everyone. Even that creepy spirit owl you guys were telling me about. Come on, Twinkletoes. What is it really?"

From where he was sitting, Aang shifted on Appa's fur and wondered where to start. _Katara. The Avatar State. Katara. My Spirit World visions. Katara. The future. Katara. _

"You know what, Toph?" he finally said, and his voice sounded like it was coming from far away. "I'll let you know. After I speak to the Guru. Because to be honest, I'm just winging it at the moment."

Aang didn't turn around, and so he didn't see the expression that crossed her face. And because of that, he didn't realise that he'd spoken his earlier thoughts aloud.

Not that it would have mattered. Even Toph didn't know why she suddenly felt a spike of resentment surge through her chest, and if she had, she wouldn't have shared. Instead, the little earthbender just snorted and curled herself into a ball for the rest of the trip, letting the sightlessness of both of them consume the silence in between.

* * *

The wind whispered through the sudden quiet, and Mai pulled her hands back as if they'd burned her. Agni. It _was_ him, and she didn't realise how she hadn't seen it before. Because even though he'd been in her life for such a short time, her eyes fell on his curved jaw, his liquid brown eyes and his half-quirked lips, and she felt as if she knew him.

And quickly after that realisation came another one. _He came back._

It was enough to make her forget their position for a moment. _Someone came back. _But then he shifted, and she was suddenly reminded of how tightly they was pressed together, and how well his legs fit around her hips.

Somehow, it didn't matter anymore that she was completely spent. She threw him off her and stood, so abruptly that she almost fell again in the process. As for Shen Li, trained reflexes managed to roll him to his feet until they were facing each other again, only this time with a safe distance in between.

Mai didn't realise she was still breathing. "What are you doing here?" she rasped.

Shen Li didn't realise he was still staring at her. "You're alive."

That was it, but somehow the exchange made Mai's fists clench. Whether it was partly due to discomfort, or wholly due to irritation, she wasn't sure. All she knew was that the look on his face was suddenly making her very edgy. She stood her ground, and repeated. "What are you doing here?"

It was as if she were speaking into the wind. He didn't seem to hear, his gaze focusing as he looked at her. Whatever he saw made him smile crookedly, with half his mouth. "You're alive," he whispered, and she heard uncharacteristic emotion filter through the cracks in his voice. "Oh Agni... you're _alive_."

He spoke like a confirmed prayer, like a sceptic who'd seen a miracle, and the trace of awe made her uncomfortable. For someone who'd had emotion bred out of her for years and was only beginning to reacquaint herself with it, she had been exposed to an awful lot in a very short time. Mai felt jittery as he stared, as he murmured "How is that even possible?", and as he looked at her with that indecipherable expression in his gaze. It was only when he seemed to remember something and the look vanished that her nerves stilled.

Shen Li cocked his head, and the ghost of his smile broadened. "You tried to kill me."

Mai crossed her arms. She refused to even try to analyse his expression at the moment, and so she ignored it. "I thought you were one of them," she said belligerently. "The way you burst in through the trees like that... you weren't exactly proving otherwise."

"You tried to kill me," he repeated, shaking his head in amusement. "Twice."

Annoyance shot through her like an arrow. "And the mask. Why are you wearing a mask?"

The words seemed to snap him out of it, and all of a sudden he was serious again. The black cloth in his hand stretched a little as he settled it back in place. "I took a closer look while I was raiding their camp," he explained. "All of their scouts wear these, it seems, and so it's kept them off my back while I've been looking for you."

Mai sat down abruptly.

Part of it was because she was still tired - her newly healed body had just sprinted and dodged over a mile of rough terrain in ten minutes, and the thirty second tussle with Shen Li had taken more out of her than she could have imagined. The other part of it was because she had a lot of information to process, and it just seemed simpler to do it sitting down.

She wet her lips, and started with the easiest question. "You raided their camp?"

"A temporary one," he said, settling himself down opposite her. The grace of his movements unnerved her, when she was feeling so ill at ease with herself. "Not the main one we were looking for, but the earthbenders who attacked us."

Mai's heart sank, even as she revelled in the familiarity of business. "Not the main one? It's been two days. You'll have to go back soon, and..."

_And all of this will have been for nothing, _she wanted to say, but then he interrupted. "And you can carry on."

Mai said nothing. Her eyes fixed on his hand as it dipped into his tunic, bringing out a sheaf of paper. The way he handled it told her exactly what it was before he handed it to her, and its very existence sent more questions spinning into her mind. Mai took the map without preamble and without reading it.

"Why aren't you there?" she demanded bluntly, suddenly. Feeling the paper made it real in her hands, and she lifted her head, her amber gaze burning into his. "You have the location, you have the mount, you have the ability. So _why_?"

Too late, she realised that she didn't really want to hear the answer, even as a part of her yearned for it. Shen Li tilted his head, giving her a look. With a start, she recognised it as an expression she'd seen on Azula's face often - the _don't be stupid you know why _kind of look. And for some reason that infuriated her even more. "You should be there right now," her fingers crumpled the parchment a little, agitated. "Not here. You should be completing the mission. You should be..."

"Tell me," Shen Li said softly, and his gaze was such that she instantly froze. "If our situations were reversed, would you have left me?"

His eyes were magnetic. Mai opened her mouth to say something that rose to her lips out of instinct, something cutting, but he wasn't finished yet. "Would you have kept going? Would you have just turned your back on the memory of me and continued with the mission?"

Her lungs felt as if she had no air. He kept going, slower now, slightly less sure, and Mai realised with a start that for the first time since she'd met him, she could read his face. The mask was completely gone - his features sagged with life and emotion, the dark rings brushing the top of his cheekbones telling her that he was as exhausted as she felt. He looked as if he hadn't slept for days. But it was his eyes that told her everything - eyes so open that she felt as if she were drowning in his remembered fear and desperation.

They were beautiful eyes. Eyes that had navigated the same court upbringing she had. Eyes that were overflowing with a million things he couldn't say, but was now expressing. Eyes that she didn't know could exist. "Would you have abandoned that chance? Any chance, no matter how slim, that I was still alive?"

She was cold. He was leaning forwards now, his hands half extended to her and his gaze intense. Somehow, the position itself read as an invitation, although to what she wasn't sure. That, and his presence itself sparked a shiver in her, _left behind, nothing special, _and she opened her mouth...

And then she remembered that down that path lay hurt, and the last time was still too fresh in her mind for her to risk it. Her jaw snapped shut like a steel trap, and when she spoke, she could almost feel the mask moulding her face. "Yes. I would have."

She could have said more. Something like _Zuko sent us here for information, not to babysit each other. _Or _no-one asked you to search for a corpse. _But she didn't need to. Shock hovered on his face for a moment, the stunned hurt of a grave miscalculation, and then his features were as smooth as hers had ever been and his hands dropped to his lap.

"Of course," he said neutrally, and she was surprised at how much flatness could sting. "Well then, we should get moving. Direct me to your camp. I'll fill you in on everything of utility on the way."

Before she could even process the change in him, he was rising sharply to his feet and striding away . She found herself scrambling to her feet and following. But as soon as she did, the blood rushed to her head and something akin to regret swept through her as she saw the stiffness of his back.

The call rushed out of her throat before she could think. "Wait."

He didn't turn. He just halted, still ramrod straight and facing away from her. "What is it?"

Again, no words seemed to come to her mouth. Her throat felt empty, gaping like a void, and she was reminded of how she'd felt in those first few days of prison, when the renewed stirrings of feeling inside her had only emphasised the rest of her lack of emotion. Mai's voice cracked when she finally spoke, and what came out certainly wasn't what she'd been expecting.

"Katara."

The name made him turn, but she was already stumbling back down to the river bank, cursing herself for forgetting. The waterbender's eyes fluttered but didn't open as the noblewoman knelt by her side, hands going under her shoulders as she tried to lift her again. But she was just so _tired_. What had seemed bearable before when the adrenaline had sung in her veins was now impossible. Katara was not a big girl, but Mai had carried her for over a mile, and she was feeling it. It seemed like she could barely lift her own arm, let alone another's. But still, she kept trying, her shoes sliding for purchase in the mud as she changed angles and grips... all to the same ineffectual end. She was about to give up in frustration and leave the waterbender be when a black-clad figure joined them by the riverside.

Mai froze in surprise as Shen Li knelt by Katara's other side, his cool eyes assessing the situation. When he came to a decision, he shifted forwards and hooked his own hands under the girl's body, mirroring her position. And then his gaze rose to meet hers and he waited.

Mai moved numbly, so unsettled by his neutral face that she barely noticed it when they lifted the waterbender effortlessly between them. Together, they walked the few steps to the waiting basilisk, depositing Katara on the front of the saddle. Then Shen Li turned, offering his hand out in cold civility. She ignored it and swung herself up on the saddle. And it could have been her imagination, but when he remounted as well, she swore his eyes were harder.

Without a word, Mai lifted the reins from around Katara and began to nudge them upstream. Shen Li kept their mounts abreast as if they re-entered the forest. Mai quelled a shiver, the cold night air knifing at her drenched clothing. If it hadn't been for the fact that Katara was slung in front of her and that there was a frosty silence instead of surprising camaraderie, it could have been two days earlier.

For a reason she refused to acknowledge, Mai felt a strange sense of loss at the realisation. It was entirely irrational, she knew. And yet...

When Shen Li finally spoke, she pounced on the sound with relief. "Well," he said. his voice still neutral. "I'm glad you found Lady Katara."

But then when the relief wore off and the words sank in, something hot, like fire, shot through her. "You two know each other?"

Shen Li shrugged. "We met briefly before she left. Anyway, I'm glad. It will make the plan I've been considering so much easier."

Thank Agni for business. Mai felt her clenched insides relax as she looked at him guardedly. "Oh really? What exactly do you have in mind?"

He didn't smile, and she expected it, and so surprisingly it hurt. "Well, you were right," the guard captain said blandly, as if he were discussing the weather. "We have the map, we should see to it that we complete the mission. I might have to return to the capitol, but you let it be known yourself that you don't. And Katara has made it clear that she is not bound either."

Mai frowned. Even knowing that it shouldn't, the change in him was affecting her. She tried to shake it off, to no avail. "Get to the point."

He gave her a look she didn't want to interpret, but then the coldness of his voice hit her and she didn't have to. "As you wish, my Lady," he inclined his head, a faint mocking edge to his tone. "Well, simply put, I think that you two should find our scouts. It shouldn't be too difficult. Infiltrate the camp, storm it, whatever you like. But get our men out of there."

The tone of his voice stung, but well..._ she had asked for it._ "You make it sound like a walk in the park," she commented, deliberately examining her fingernails. After all, two could play at his game. She sighed with affected boredom, drawing it out to wound. "Then again, I guess it's easy for you to talk. You're the one running away and leaving us your dirty work."

She knew it was a low blow before she delivered it, but somehow she didn't care. It shored up her walls, applying fresh mortar to crumbling stone. And besides, he could take it. She _knew_ he could take it. And he proved her right. Shen Li didn't stop. He didn't even pull up his basilisk or launch into a set of histrionics, like certain others she remembered might. Instead, she felt the air ice over, and a warning tingle ran down her spine.

"I never run." the guard captain said bitingly. But it was his body, not his words, which pinned her. His eyes bored into her own as the basilisks swayed, making them dance up and down in some uneasy rhythm. And yet they could have been alone and still for all she knew, as she matched his stare for stare.

Finally, he moved, and the hold seemed to fade. She blinked, and a slow curl crept up his lip, until his mouth was lifted in a half-smirk.

Considering herself now an expert on his expressions, Mai decided she didn't like this one.

"Besides," he continued deliberately, as if there had never been a pause. "You are Lady Mai. Breaking out five scouts? How hard can that be?"

* * *

In the darkness of the cavern, there was no wind. There was only a light. A bright light. That was all Ling saw as it circled the room, as it lit up the darkness from the inside out. Every cycle it disappeared, snatched behind the form of a tall, robed man before reappearing on the other side, too far away to make anything but a shadow of the man's features.

He couldn't move.

Rock was pressed against his mouth, against his chest, forcing his head upright. This was not what he'd expected. His fellow scouts had said nothing, their eyes curiously blank when they'd been led out of this hideous room. And as the circling light burned ever brighter into his retinas, he was afraid he knew why.

The man kept speaking, but did not stir. "There is no peace in this Nation. There is no peace in our world. There are people who do not understand that."

It was a low, measured voice. A quiet voice. A reasonable voice. Ling felt a part of his mind fade into it, giving in to that reassuring rhythm even as the other screamed in terror.

By the time they were done, there was dirt and blood in his mouth.

* * *

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A/N II: I'm going to try very hard to update for Christmas, but if I can't, Merry Christmas to all of you loyal reviewers and readers. Thank you again for your support.

And remember, the best Christmas/holiday present in the world of fanfic is a review ^.^.


	21. In the Sand

**Chapter 21: In the Sand**

Disclaimer: Not mine, don't sue.

A/N I: I hope you all had a Merry Christmas or a Happy Holiday! Sorry for not getting this out earlier, but hey, at least it's out, yes? :) Hope you all enjoy.

* * *

_Draw a line you thought so strong,_

_Watch it vanish in the sand,_

_Beliefs you've clutched to, oh so long,_

_Naught but ashes in your hand._

* * *

Colours.

They were the first things she saw - muddy browns, wet blues, and tender greens. She clutched at them and felt them slip through her fingers, barely registering that she was still at the riverbank and still alive. Dimly, at the corner of her mind, Katara was aware of the sound of a struggle, of a male voice wheezing and a female hissing. Instinctively, she tried to scramble up, to help. But the second she rose, her muscles and veins pulled beneath her, and then she was aware of nothing.

* * *

The second time Katara awoke, she could feel black scales shifting beneath her. The cool breath of early morning kissed her skin as she slowly clawed her way back to the land of the living. She regretted it almost instantly when a wave of dizziness swept over her.

Lightheaded, Katara felt a groan pass through her lips. There were a few seconds of delay, and then the beast beneath her slowed. She lay against it, lifeless, trying to blink back the spots of light that filtered through her vision. When a cold and impersonal hand brushed briefly against her cheek, she didn't even have the balance to jerk away.

"Lady Katara," she thought she vaguely recognised the voice, but she wasn't sure. "Lady Katara, are you all right?"

Bile boiled up in her throat. _No. I am not all right. _But she didn't even have the strength to retch. Instead, Katara miserably clung onto the scales beneath her, happy that at least they weren't moving anymore. It was only the movement inside her head now that she had to deal with - the one that felt like waves of nausea were chasing each other across her brain. She squeezed her eyes shut and breathed against the dizziness, trying to bring everything under control.

The sound of a voice stirred over her again, and she realised that this one was different. Memorable. The brief image of knives and needles flashed into her head, but she was so busy trying not to throw up that she couldn't place it.

"She's alive. She'll be fine."

Irately, the part of her that wasn't concentrating on dealing with the nausea reared. How did _she_ know that it was fine? Had _she_ just suffered severe blood loss? Had _she _just passed out from waterbending after said blood loss? To be honest, if it hadn't been for the fact that nausea and ice seemed to be seeping into every known inch of her, Katara would have doubted that she was still alive.

As it was, the afterlife couldn't be so sickening. She'd gotten what she thought was a glimpse of it in her Spirit World journey, after all, and then it had seemed quite comfortable. So Katara grimly asserted to her confused and searching mind that she was indeed alive, and clearly with at least two people and a beast who hadn't killed her yet.

Of course, just as she thought that, the animal cried out and reared beneath her. Katara cried out too as the world merged into millions and each dimension shattered onto her reeling head. She had just enough time to register two pairs of blurred golden eyes in front of her before her body collapsed and she blacked out again.

* * *

The third time, Katara thought wearily, really was the charm. She awoke slowly, relishing the calm in her own mind. Her skin still felt clammy and cold, but that was infinitely more bearable than the rushing nausea that she'd suffered before. A thin woolen blanket was pressed against her, and she felt sunlight warming it. She was so tired she could stay here forever...

"So. You're awake."

Or not.

The quiet, emotionless voice was enough to bring everything flooding back. Suddenly, the sea of weariness and weakness she was drifting in became something to fight, something to conquer. Katara began to struggle upwards, battling the apathy in her bones with such fervour that she was halfway to rising before cool hands pushed her firmly back down again.

"Are you insane?" the tone was cutting now, and Katara fuzzily thought she could detect hints of frustration and annoyance as well. Her head was clearing, but it was still a matter of process. "Lie down. You're still weak."

Katara's eyes snapped open. "_What_ did you just say?"

The noblewoman's face was a blur in front of her for a second, and then she managed some focus and looked into two golden eyes. They were cold, and oddly damaged.

"You're. Still. Weak." Mai enunciated slowly. "And by the sounds of it, still slow as well. Get it into your head, waterbender. I've _orders_ not to let you move for the next few hours."

Katara was so angry that she didn't even register the simmering fury still vocal in the other girl's tone, nor the fact that it wasn't even directed at her. "I'm _not_ weak," she snapped, pushing herself up to lean on her elbows. "And I don't need you to babysit me!"

Something strange contorted in Mai's face. "Is that so?" she asked dangerously. "Well then, next time you do something so _stupid_ as to just surge into battle like that and not even check the cover for archers, you carry yourself for over a mile running away!"

Katara blinked. The words stirred up vague memories in her daze; of water, of fire, and of pain. Suddenly, it was as if the fire inside her had been banked. "You... did that for me?"

The other girl moved to retort, and then froze. With surprise, Katara realised she could read her, read the truth in the other girl's normally stoic face. There was no excuse this time, even if she tried. It hadn't been for Zuko. It hadn't even been for Sokka. It had been for her.

"Thank you," she said, her own voice heartfelt and sure. "For fighting. For not leaving me behind."

For a moment, it was almost comical the way Mai's eyes widened. And then the second passed and Katara was left facing an even stonier look than before. She blinked again. What had just happened?

Before she could think of any answers, Mai got to her feet stiffly and walked away. With a bit of effort, Katara tilted her head to follow her. The other girl stopped at a small fire not three meters away, kneeling down to remove something above it. Katara's range of vision widened, and she recognised with a start that they were back at her camping place, where she'd made her home and her base for the last few days.

Only... there were changes. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see a black lizard-beast thing harnessed to a tree, its tail swinging peacefully as it rested in the grass. _A basilisk_, the name sprung to her mind, and she remembered when the girl standing by the fire had been one of the trio hunting them down on the creatures.

The same girl who had just carried her over a mile away from certain death. How people changed.

Katara was still inwardly shaking her head in wonder of it all when Mai returned. This time, she was holding a stick in each hand, a lump of something skewered onto them. It was Katara's turn to be surprised.

"Here," the Fire Nation girl said roughly, handing one to her. "Eat. Iron and protein, so I'm told."

Katara looked at her strangely, and then took the stick gingerly in her hand. The meat, or whatever it was, was nearly unrecognisable. The outside was black and charred, and she had a sneaking suspicion that deep inside the meat was still raw. A surge of revulsion swept through her, tempered just as quickly by the realisation that she was ravenous. She hadn't eaten properly for a while. Since Mai had arrived, broken, carried and healed by the river, she hadn't had time to go down to one of the villages in her normal garb to buy food. The small supply of bread and cheese had quickly vanished after that, split between two mouths as it were. That, and the fact that she had lost a lot of blood made the even the burnt, raw meat seem oddly appealing...

Katara looked at it again. Closer this time. And decided that it didn't matter how hungry she was.

"What were these?" she asked in disbelief, shaking the stick a little. "And where did you get them? Did you go hunting while I was unconscious or something?"

Mai flushed as she scowled. "They were two rabbit-mice," she said stiffly. "And I don't care if you don't like them. I have _orders_ that you're to eat."

This time, Katara was switched on enough to catch the sarcasm in the other girl's voice, and she sat up slowly. "Wait, I think I remember. I... when I was on the basilisk. There were two of you. A guy."

Mai's lips tightened. Katara moved forwards cautiously, aware she was treading on dangerous ground. "Was he the one who hunted? I mean, I know you were running out of needles..."

Mai's fingers instinctively went up to brush her chest, and the four senbon that were nestled there. He'd given them back to her in a manner as cold as a wintry sea. She hadn't asked why he'd kept them. But she'd noticed that he'd stored them in his tunic above his heart. Her breath came out peculiarly in a sigh. "Shen Li."

Katara blinked. "He was here?" she tilted her head to look around the campsite again. "Where is he?"

Something infinitesimally small in Mai hardened. "He went back to the capitol," she said, and then fought the urge to squirm when the waterbender's blue eyes landed back on her in question. "Look, just get started, will you? I'll explain what's going on while you eat."

Katara's eyebrows arched elegantly, and then she looked again at the stick in her hand. The black matter wrapped around it hung heavy off the wood, even though the outside was already flaking from the fire. She tested its weight in her hand. There had to be enough meat there for some salvaging, she decided. Perhaps even a simple scraping and then a re-cooking. Perhaps boiled...

"No. You explain what's going on while I fix this up for both of us," she said determinedly, and then began to rise.

Mai pushed her down again. "Are you insane? I told you to rest! You lost a lot of blood. I don't even know how you managed to heal yourself after that."

Katara looked at her questioningly, and the noblewoman recoiled slightly as if she'd let something slip. "I mean... look. You're no use to me weak."

A few minutes ago, Katara would have blown up at her again, just like she had when she'd awoken. But now, her head was clearing, and so were her eyes. And the slight panic in the other's gaze told her everything.

If Katara had been upright, she would have folded her arms. "Come off it." She raised her eyebrow and nodded at the meat Mai held in her own hand. "You really expect me to believe you're going to eat that?"

The noblewoman's face turned blank, as smooth as a mirror as she debated internally. But when it was over, she softened.

"All right," she relented, and handed her meat over. "I'll go get the map."

* * *

The bard that Ty Lee had selected was birdlike, her eyes sharp and intelligent as she peered over her glasses at him. It hadn't taken Zuko long to decide that he liked her. All she'd had to do was hand him the work she'd done already, and in his eyes she'd immediately proven herself. He only wished his Ministers and officials were half as efficient.

"So you already have the truth verifications?" he asked.

She nodded. "My assistants are working on them. So far, we have at least twenty soldiers who'll swear on the light of Agni that your version of events is the correct one. And I think there'll be more."

Something tense inside Zuko relaxed. "Good work." he said, and was about to ask her about how the casting was going when there was a knock on the door.

The question died on his lips. "Come in!" he called instead, and the tenseness returned with a vengeance when he saw that it was a messenger.

"Fire Lord Zuko? The Ministers are waiting for you. The first of the refugees have arrived, and one of them has been sent up to debrief."

Zuko was out of his chair before the man finished "Tell them I'm coming soon."

The man nodded, left, and soon Zuko was alone in his study when the bard departed too. Internally, his mind was working on overdrive even as he hastily pulled on his ceremonial robes. _The first of the refugees have arrived_. Before Shen Li and Mai, and while the information might turn out to be a poor substitute, at least it might be something.

He was lightly panting when he reached the throne room, sweeping past his Ministers and into his chair with barely a inclination of his head as he sat. None of them seemed to notice much. The Minister for Culture, Education and Citizenship was surreptitiously filing his nails, while the Minister for Innovation, Science, Research and Transport was lightly dozing. Only Minister for War (Defense, Zuko reminded himself) and the Minister for Security were sitting to attention, and Zuko's eyes narrowed. Curious.

He hadn't been seated for a minute when the guard at the throne room entrance stirred. "Goodman Pauzon of the first village in Weiji Province!"

For such a seemingly grand title, the farmer who stepped in was old and grey, his body stooped with age and weariness. He had clearly been travelling for hours, and his long beard looked as tangled and tired as him. Zuko instantly rose from his throne.

"Xiu! Please get Goodman Pauzon a seat. And some water," he turned to the farmer and bowed his head briefly as the servant scurried away to attend to his orders. "My apologies, Goodman Pauzon. I was not told that you had not rested."

The old man raised one bushy grey eyebrow, and Zuko noticed for the first time that there was a hard, searching expression in the man's gaze that was only softened by a tinge of surprise. "Thank you, my Lord," he said guardedly, settling down into the chair when it was brought. "It's been a long journey."

"I can imagine," Zuko nodded sympathetically, noting the tears in the farmer's clothing, the dirt that stooped his back. When the goblet of water arrived, the old man drank it like he'd been parched for years. Zuko waited patiently until he seemed done and a trifle more rested.

"So, Goodman Pauzon. I was told you had a report for us?"

Instantly, he was reminded of the suspicion and searching in the refugee's eyes as they met gazes once more. "Aye, my Lord," he said, his eyes keen as if he were searching for any tremor, any lie. "I've an interesting story to tell."

Across the hall, General Sheng twitched, and Zuko noted it down almost automatically. His Minister for Security was in a strange mood today, he decided. The normally controlled man seemed oddly agitated, and he couldn't help but wonder... "Well spit it out, man," Sheng said impatiently. "We haven't got all day."

Pauzon's eyes shifted briefly to the Minister's, and then back to Zuko's. And when he opened his mouth again, he told them of burnt wood floating down the river and men dressed in Fire Nation uniforms. He told them of smoke and shouting, of swords and fire. He told them of children crying and of women weeping, his eyes never leaving the Fire Lord's face as he watched for a reaction. And when he told them of mist and the Painted Lady, the room began to murmur.

"Fire Lord Zuko!" Sheng seemed to be restraining himself from leaping to his feet. "Do you truly believe this nonsense?!"

Pauzon's face hardened. "You tell me it's nonsense, General, when you ride out to my village and see its burnt remains."

Sheng seemed about to reply when Hang cut him off. "Now, now, calm down gentlemen," he drawled lazily. "We're not accusing anyone of lying." His eyes drifted to Pauzon's. "But you yourself admitted that your journey has been long. Perhaps along the way, your weariness has sharpened memory into embellishment?"

Before Zuko could stop it from going any further, voices were everywhere. General Jiang was arguing with Sheng, while the Minister for Health and Human Services had teamed up with Pauzon to round on Hang. The Minister for Agriculture and Environment was trying to quieten the rest of his fellows down, who seemed to be arguing amidst themselves for quiet. Only Hui remained serene, and when his voice rose, all the Ministers stilled before Zuko could even utter a sound.

"Everyone! Please, if there is any nonsense it is in the way we're acting."

Zuko cleared his throat before anyone else could jump in. "The Chief Advisor is correct," he said firmly. "Return to your seats, we will hear the rest of this story."

Sheng stirred. "Fire Lord, how can you expect us to believe this? Good Fire Nation soldiers attacking their own people is already a stretch. But an old folktale coming to life and saving these people? Impossible!"

"Sheng," Hui beat Zuko to the chase yet again, and the General quieted reluctantly. "There are many things in this world that we thought were impossible, but which turned out to be true. The rediscovery of the Avatar, for example."

Zuko began to relax again when his Chief Advisor continued. "However, it is also difficult to believe that the legend of the Painted Lady has indeed resurfaced. And of course, if that is part of your tale, must we doubt the other, more pertinent parts as well?" Hui turned to face the farmer. "Please, Goodman Pauzon. If you could at least further explain?"

Zuko watched with interest as the old man narrowed his eyes. There was surprise in his expression - surprise mixed with resentment. Clearly, he believed what he was saying, even if no one else did. The farmer seemed to consider something, and then he raised his head. "Fire Lord? If I could speak to you alone?"

It was Zuko's turn to be surprised, and he certainly wasn't the only one. There was a brief murmur in the hall as Zuko considered how to respond, his eyes surreptitiously surveying his Ministers' reactions as he did so. Most of them seemed concerned, but were content to be filled in later. His gaze slid right, to some of the people who were most important and some of who he trusted least. General Hang seemed to be carelessly examining the sleeve of his robes, but a faint sheen of sweat shone against his skin in the light of the fire. General Sheng was muttering about unprecedented ridiculousness. Chief Advisor Hui sat above it all, the perfect picture of serenity.

Zuko made his decision. "Very well," he said simply.

There were the sounds of scraping chairs, muttered questions and rustling cloth, and then one voice rose to cut through them all. "Fire Lord Zuko. I am the Minister for Security! How do you expect me to do my job when I am not privy to important information?"

Zuko's eyes narrowed in dislike. "I assure you, General Sheng, that if the information is important enough I will share it with you. But for now, my order stands. Everybody, leave."

For a moment, Sheng looked as if he might protest. But then Hui glided over to him, taking him by the elbow. There was a brief moment where the two men's gazes met, and then Sheng shook off the Chief Advisor's grip with a scowl and stalked out the door.

Hui turned back to the throne with a shrug, and Zuko nodded gratefully to him. He'd have to repay him sometime for the loyalty that he was growing more and more sure of. He watched as the old man calmly shepherded the rest of the Ministers and servants outside, and then turned back to Pauzon with curiosity.

"Well, we're alone now," he commented unnecessarily. "What did you want to discuss?"

The old farmer surveyed him keenly for a moment, but he said nothing. Zuko felt strangely as if those eyes were reaching into his very soul. And then the spell was broken as Pauzon moved, as his knuckled, age-spotted hand reached under his beard. Instantly, Zuko tensed, remembering his assassinations training.

Pauzon's fingers parted to reveal a simple, carved talisman of the Painted Lady. Zuko instantly relaxed, chiding himself for his paranoia. The old man met his gaze again.

"You're different from what I expected, Fire Lord," Pauzon said abruptly. "So maybe you'll be able to tell me something."

Zuko blinked. That certainly hadn't been what he'd been expecting, and something in the man's voice made his knuckles whiten on the grip of his throne. "What?"

The old farmer smiled grimly. "You know any water spirits with blue eyes?"

* * *

The stew was delicious, and a miracle given what it had started out as. But Katara barely even tasted it as she frowned over the map Shen Li had procured.

"It doesn't seem too far away," she said, half-uncertainly as she traced the dotted line.

"I don't think it is," Mai answered decisively. "An hour's ride. That's all it should take."

Katara's lips firmed. "Well then, I guess we should get started."

It was Mai's turn to blink. "What? Now?"

Katara nodded, her face set in determination. "Yes, now."

Mai raised her eyes incredulously to trace the other's. The waterbender was still pale from blood loss, her skin a dull grey beneath her normal tan. She looked exhausted. Neither Mai nor Shen Li had thought to change her besides removing her hat and veil for comfort, and so her Painted Lady outfit hung off her raggedly, still caked in sweat and blood.

Mai was sure she didn't look too much better. "But why? We need to rest. You need to rest. You shouldn't even be moving."

Katara shook her head. Even though she hadn't really wanted to eat, the stew sat warming in her now, giving her new life and energy to fuel her determination. The last battle had shaken her. This time, the soldiers had obviously been prepared, and they hadn't even fallen for her mist and spirit-like tricks. Now that she thought about it, that meant that there was no longer any use playing the saving game. It was better to strike directly to the source. Now that she knew there _was_ a source.

Katara felt the confidence and the empowerment that the Spirit World journey had gifted her rise up again as she made her choice. "No. I've wasted too long just whittling at the edges. Every day, they attack more and more villages, and this time they're ready for me. I say we save your scouts and the rest of your people as soon as possible instead."

The other girl's face remained carefully neutral. "You're insane." She gestured to the map. "If this really is their base, their stronghold, we won't be able to make a dent in it before we're killed."

Katara recoiled. "I'm not suggesting an all out attack!"

"What are you suggesting then?" Mai demanded, and watched the other girl wilt a little before straightening again.

"Well, perhaps not a physical strike. But what about an intellectual one? You said that you and Shen Li came here to find the scouts as well as get information on this secret army." She was so caught up in her reasoning that she didn't notice the second's flicker of indecipherable emotion across Mai's face at the guard captain's name. "Maybe if we infiltrate the base, we can free your scouts and get Zuko the information at the same time!"

Infiltration. Mai focused on the word as she tried to push away the conflicting feelings inside of her. This was infuriating. The mere mention of him, and she wasn't sure whether to rage or bow her head in regret. Suddenly, she wanted to get going as eagerly as her companion. Because if she had the mission to focus on, she wouldn't have to think...

"Sounds like a plan," she said, standing up abruptly. "Okay."

She turned around too swiftly to see the surprise on the waterbender's face. Katara had been expecting an argument. When none came, she remained seated in shock for a moment before pushing herself up to follow after.

There wasn't much for them to get ready. Katara traded her Painted Lady outfit for her black ninja one, checked over her miraculously healed shoulder again, and then got her water flask ready. Mai simply redid her hair and then untied their mount from the tree and swung herself up into the saddle. The basilisk whickered beneath her a second later, and the noblewoman turned her head.

Katara was leaning against the animal, obviously both unsure of how to get up and still too drained to do herself. Mai frowned. The waterbender was pale - paler than she'd ever seen her, and she hesitated for a second.

"Are you sure you're up to this?"

Katara didn't even stop to question the insinuation of care in her companion's tone. Her shoulders straightened, her mouth hardened, and her eyes set. "I'll rest on the way there," she said crisply, extending her arm for a hand up. Without thinking, Mai instinctively reached out in turn and they clasped fingers, pale skin against mocha.

For a moment, blue gazed into gold and each reaffirmed their situation. Two girls, two nations, two opposites, and two debts repaid. And then Katara smiled.

"Let's do this."

* * *

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A/N II: Phew... I was *this* close to not posting this tonight. In fact, I have to apologise for any bad writing, spelling errors and for the shortness of this chapter, because I ended up writing most of it very late at night to make the self-imposed deadline. So thanks to all of my beautiful, lovely reviewers - you really helped pull me over the edge. ^.^


	22. Clear as Water

**Chapter 22: Clear as Water**

Disclaimer: Not mine, don't sue.

A/N I: First of all, my apologies. This time the break really was too long. Unfortunately, the first week was spent stressing and organising a 'holiday', the second week was the 'holiday' with little time to write, and this last week has been spent writing feverishly again. So again, I apologise for the wait and my lack of organisation. Please don't hold it against me *puppy dog eyes*.

Oh, and I hope this was worth the wait. :)

* * *

Clear as water,

Clear as mud,

On ripples broken,

By spilt blood.

* * *

Shen Li's map was unmistakeably rough - written by people who knew exactly what they were doing and were only grudgingly sketching down a reminder in the off-chance they forgot. But to Katara's eyes, used to Sokka's meanderings and lines livened by imagination, each scribble was as straight as an arrow pointing towards their target. Mai had to remind herself not to be impressed as she clung to the basilisk reins, her eyes slitted and ready for any obstacles while the waterbender dictated from behind.

"Erm... well, it says to head north-west here. So let's go."

Mai briefly stole a glance at the sheet held out in front of her, and then raised her head and tugged the basilisk into position. The brief look she'd had had only revealed once again the indecipherable mess of rough scribbles. It could barely be called a drawing, let alone a map. And she was fairly sure that she could have wrestled with it for half an hour and not been able to get anything remotely resembling a direction such as north-west.

At least the other girl was handy for something.

They kept moving, both of them quiet as the basilisk clawed the dirt beneath them. The curve in the river faded from view as they moved deeper into the forest, and Mai absentmindedly wondered whether that made the waterbender uncomfortable. She herself could fight without her knives and needles, but even then it was a little disconcerting, like opening a door with a different hand. She hadn't seen much evidence that the other girl could do without her waterbending either - Ty Lee's quick hands had shown that enough. She thinned her lips. She hoped that where they were going, Katara was still useful. That she wouldn't get hurt _again_. Mai didn't need to turn her head to see how pale the girl still was, and the whiteness made her uncomfortable. It just didn't belong there, blossomed over tanned skin. It didn't seem right. And neither did the weakness.

"Stop."

The word was whispered close to her ear, and Mai started out of instinct, pulling the reins sharply back. The waterbender's hand was pressing down lightly on her shoulder, her breath skimming past her skin. Mai hissed, feeling the need for quiet pressing down on her like a tonne of bricks. "What is it?"

The hand left her shoulder and pointed to the right. Mai's eyes followed. There, just ahead of them, there was a small, unnaturally perfect open space littered with the rich remnants of charred wood. At the end of the glade encircling the remnants of what must have been a violent clearing of the forest, the base of one of the Weiji mountains rose. About four meters from the ground, a ledge jutted out over the large fissure of a cave in the rock. Around them, the woods were still. Unnaturally still.

Carefully, she turned her head. But Katara looked straight past her, her eyes gleaming with triumph.

"We're here."

* * *

Pauzon creaked as he walked back to the inn, feeling his age melt down from his skin and sticky his bones. Sweet Lady, it hurt to move. Only three hours ago, he'd still been on the road, pushing his body through the last stretch of what had been a journey five times more arduous than his wizened body could take. And now...

The old farmer sighed. Now he was in his nation's capitol, the gem of the Fire Nation, and he wished he could be home again.

Pauzon shifted his weight, grunted at the ache in his knees, and turned left. _At least my memory hasn't deserted me_, he thought wryly. In fact, if it hadn't been for his uncanny sense of direction, he knew that he would have long ago gotten lost in the bustle and busyness of the market streets. Of course, if it hadn't been for his stubbornness, suspicion, and pride, he wouldn't have had to remember. Pauzon felt another bone creak and began to distinctly regret turning down the Fire Lord's offer of an escort back. After all, if he'd accepted, then he wouldn't have had to walk or even think as he dozed off in a small palanquin.

Then again, if he'd accepted, he would have accepted something from the traitor Prince. And despite his surprise at the way the boy had carried himself, had acted... he was not ready to take such a decisive step yet.

Not even to avoid this. Pauzon's lips thinned beneath his beard as he stood straighter, tried to look a little more imposing and unapproachable as the wide streets paved with stones and hawker shops gave way to twining roads and alleys that snaked towards the outer edge of the city. It was a sharp contrast to the gaudy displays of affluence he'd seen in the palace and noble district. Here, the very air seemed darker, and the houses leaned against each other warily for support. A born and bred countryman, he knew he should have felt more comfortable as the throng of people thinned out around him to just one or two passers-by, but instead he felt more on edge. There was something a little off as he got further away from the palace. No one felt the need for forced smiles in this corner, and so his eyes flicked across faces filled with uncertainty and distrust. Pauzon quickened his pace as much as he could, but he knew he had no chance of escaping the almost oppressive belligerence that seemed to douse the place. The people here were itching, clawing, and he wasn't sure how to respond.

It didn't matter - they did it for him. Pauzon drew himself up startled when a stranger brushed passed him heavily. For a second, there eyes met hard, and then the man stopped and stepped to the side like a circling shark.

"You. You're with the refugees, aren't you?"

There was a thinly veiled hostility in that voice, and the old farmer paused before answering. "Yes. Why?"

The curt reply seemed to take the man aback for a moment, and then he was back on the offensive. "Where and for who do our country brothers stand?" he demanded abruptly.

There would have been a time where such a bizarrely worded question would have gone over his head. But that time had changed. Pauzon narrowed his gaze and stared hard at the other man for a moment. Whatever he said, the hard lines of aggression that defined the other's jaw and cheeks might lead to a nasty end. And yet, if he delayed for too much longer...

Pauzon set his shoulders. "We stand for the Fire Nation, brother," he said neutrally. "And you?"

For a moment, he wondered whether even his carefully worded reply has been the wrong choice. The man's face twisted up almost comically, and then he let loose a laugh that sounded more like a bark and clapped the old farmer on the back. Pauzon felt his bones protest under the blow and winced.

"Good man! So do we, brother. So do we," the corners of his mouth lifted up in a hate-filled grin. "The traitor prince will never know what hit him when the time comes."

Pauzon was too world-weary and conflicted himself to be startled. "We?" he asked mildly.

The man gestured expansively in a crescent. "All of us. Or at least, most of us," he snorted contemptuously. "There are those who put too much in the divine ascendancy, royal blood, and pretty words. But the rest of us have kept our heads. No true Fire Nation man or woman can stand having an honourless traitor on the throne."

The old farmer creased his brow. Despite his own feelings as to traitors, his own traditionalist belief in bloodlines and his meeting with a young, blue-eyed girl left him wavering on the question of outright rebellion. Not to mention that he was getting too old for this. They'd just spent most of the last week fleeing one conflict. He didn't want to run into another. "There is a plan, then?" he asked carefully. "Will the crown be taken by force?"

For the first time, the stranger's face fell. "Ach, I don't know. It's hard to tell these days. Sure there are your drunken ramblings in the taverns. But if there's any real plan, they've kept it under wraps." A thought seemed to occur to him, and he brightened. "Still, that doesn't mean the traitor prince is safe. All it takes is a wrong move, a slip-up.... if it's big enough, important enough, then the entire city'll be up in arms. We're a time-bomb right now, brother. A sitting time-bomb. If you wanted in on the action, it's a good time to be in the capitol now."

Pauzon felt his heart descend down to his stomach. "I see."

He was rewarded by another clap on the shoulder. "Good man. It's good to see that underneath it all, us city and country folk are still true Fire Nation. Heh. Gives me hope, it does."

Pauzon nodded once, and then they turned away, each going in the opposite direction, one with a little more bounce in his step, the other feeling tired and shaken. Now that he thought about it, the city did seem on edge. He'd put it down to himself feeling uncomfortable at first - it had been thirty-seven years since he'd last set foot in the city after all. But now...

Pauzon sighed again, and rounded the last corner to the inn they'd been shown to. It was a sad affair - a little broken down, a little apologetic, a little old. If he'd been forced to, he would have grudgingly admitted that it had at least seen better days than Nioka's establishment, and yet it had none of the country air or warmth seeped into its wooden bones. In Pauzon's mind, the latter was far more important, and so he looked at the larger, newer building with such distaste that he was oblivious to the graffiti scattering the walls of the alley, decrying the youth he'd met with less than an hour ago.

The inn door opened to a medium-sized reception area, a drably carpeted place that nonetheless seemed warmer than the stony street he'd just left. Pauzon breathed, inhaling the faint fragrance of old incense and smoke, and stepped in. Besides the main table the innkeepers waited behind, there was a small shrine to Agni in the corner of the room. He imagined that it would have been almost peaceful if it hadn't been for the thirteen refugees who hadn't been settled in yet.

Pauzon joined the line with another sigh, quickly followed by an impressive yawn, and then looked around. To the right of the reception area, opposite the shrine, he saw a larger room where more of his fellow villagers milled around. A small boy with an exquisite topknot crouched on his haunches in front of a toddler, solemnly making faces. His mother stood to the side conversing with some of the other village women, but when she met the old farmer's eyes she quickly excused herself and made her way over.

"Pauzon! What took you so long?"

"It's a long walk, Nioka. Not to mention I had to wait a little while to get an audience with the Court. Is everything all right here?"

She nodded in the affirmative, took his arm, and drew him out of the line. "I've signed you in already. There's quite a few rooms here, but I thought you might be more comfortable if you stayed with us. Lee and I can look after you easier then."

For the first time in three hours, Pauzon smiled warmly. "Aye, thanks Nioka. You're a good woman."

The village innkeeper chuckled. "I'm a curious woman," she replied bluntly as they made their way slowly up the stairs. "What happened? Did you get to see the Fire Lord? What's he like?"

Pauzon felt trouble clutch at his chest, and he knew that it overshadowed his face when Nioka's look of anticipation turned to apprehension. "Hmm, hmm. Well, truth be told, it wasn't like what I expected. At all."

Even through his own worry, he almost chuckled as Nioka bit her questions back impatiently. Deciding to spare her, he elaborated. "For one, as soon as I walked into the hall the Fire Lord offered me a seat and some water. I hate to say it, but that was the best water I've ever drank, I was so thirsty. It was... surprising, to say the least. There he was, a little bit of a youth on that great big throne with the fire surrounding him. And he offered me a drink."

"Hmmph," Nioka pursed her lips. "That just shows he still has some manners." Her look turned reflective as her imagination took over and the ramifications of the event sank in. "Then again, I would've thought it rare that the royal types deigned to notice or even care about us commoners' needs. And they do say that manners make the man."

Pauzon snorted. "I'm not willing to judge that quite yet. But I have to say, compared to the court he was... different."

"How?"

The shadowed lines on the old farmer's face deepened. "None of them, at least not the ones who were talking, believed me about the Lady. About the Painted Spirit. In fact, three of them almost outright called me a liar."

Nioka sucked in her breath sharply through her teeth. "A liar?! Who were they? I'll show them liar - we all will! We all saw her clear as day, and then when Lee recognised her, well, I... wait. Did you tell them she was the Avatar's Waterbender? The Lady?"

Pauzon frowned. "Not all of them. Not after they accused me like that. It didn't seem right, somehow. No, I told the Lord himself."

Nioka seemed to consider this, and then sighed. "Well, at least someone knows," she shook her head. "Who would have thought? I was so happy when I heard the prince was at least keeping his father's old Ministers and Advisors - I thought they'd be our last chance at keeping the Fire Nation safe and great."

"So did I," Pauzon's frown grew deeper. "But I'm afraid that if I'm not ready to judge the young Lord, I'm at least ready to make some conclusions about his Ministers. I'm worried, Nioka. I've heard some uncomfortable news about the city's stability. The Court needs someone level-headed and willing to listen right now. Someone who can speak up for the people, not just for the Ministers' pockets and egos."

Nioka nodded, clicking her tongue in agreement. "Someone to speak up for us too," she added. "We're just the first, Pauzon, you know that. Every survivor from every village from the West side of the Weiji Province to the East will soon be flooding this city, and things may get hairy. We need someone too."

Pauzon inclined his head in acknowledgement, but said nothing, and the silent question hung between them. _But who? _After all, it'd have to be someone special. Not just any villager or refugee - such commoners would never be allowed inside the inner workings of the Court. No. Pauzon's brow furrowed as he thought. Someone different. Someone new. Someone who was on the outside enough to be able to look in, but who also had enough of a foothold in the hierarchy to wield real power.

Ah, but what was he thinking? There was no such person like that. The old farmer shook his head, sighed, and walked the last few paces to the old door that opened up to their room. But even as consciously, he gave up the searching, somewhere within him a ghostly thought formed, and then coalesced into an image.

Strangely enough, the face had blue eyes.

* * *

Zuko's face was completely and utterly blank as he walked into his study. Across from him, sunbeams arced lazily through the window, sending shafts of gold across his stacked desk. He settled down in his chair without really feeling it beneath him, and scanned his table without seeing. There was a new scroll there, one he didn't recognise, and it took him a minute or so to pick it up and begin to work on the seal.

Blindly, Zuko's fingers scrabbled at the melted wax, managing to scrape off the image of an unfolded white lotus before he managed to unseal it. The task jerked his mind back to the present and to his body. Blinking, he put the scroll down and took a deep breath.

_I am Zuko._

It was amazing how much power the simple affirmation had. He breathed again, feeling his pulse slow.

_I am Fire Lord Zuko._

That thought wasn't as calming, but it and the weight of the responsibility also felt right. Zuko breathed again.

_I am Fire Lord Zuko, sitting in my study._

At long last, his skin felt a little less clammy, his heartbeat more regular. For a moment, he felt the urge to let his eyes slide shut, to let calm wash over him...

_And somewhere in my country, Katara is fighting a one-woman battle against an army of Firebenders. _

And his eyes snapped open again, his blood pressure up, and he pounded his open palm down with such force that he was surprised nothing set alight. What he did manage to do, however, was upset several stacks of paperwork and send his newest scroll flying off the table. Zuko muttered a curse as items from his desk clanged to the floor obnoxiously, the sound only overlaid by the light fluttering of the paper as it descended through the air. The drag of paper against wind gave him just enough time to snatch it back, and it unfurled in his grip like a request.

Blinking, Zuko tried to focus on the characters. When a few seconds went by before the blur dissipated, he muttered another curse and squeezed his eyes shut. No. He'd made this decision a long time ago. He was _not_ going to get distracted by external worries when he was dealing with the state. There simply weren't enough hours in the day for him to waste. Gritting his teeth, he focused again on the scroll with determination, and was rewarded with Iroh's strokes swimming finally into focus.

_To Zuko,_

_I hope this letter finds you well, because I'm afraid I have some news. I won't be returning to the Fire Nation as soon as I'd hoped._

Zuko's heart sunk into his stomach. He'd had a feeling this would happen. Perhaps it was just the way that little seemed to be going right lately. Or perhaps that 'more upbeat attitude' Aang had talked about had vanished along with his friends.

He felt so alone.

_The Avatar and young Miss Bei Fong have taken a short trip to the Eastern Air Temple. I have given them three days, which means I will likely be seeing you in about a fortnight._

A fortnight. It sounded short, but now that it was actually there in numerical terms, Zuko was surprised at how long it felt and was. Agni, a day was a year in the world of politics - the amount of change could be both healing and catastrophic. A day was a year, and so two weeks...

_Be well, nephew. And enjoy the calming tea._

- _Iroh_

Zuko settled the paper on his desk, brought the two new sachets of tea up to his nose, and inhaled. The fragrance itself was cleansing, familiar, and for a moment he fel that if he only closed his eyes his uncle would be there beside him, ready with his hearty chuckle and obscure words of wisdom.

But of course, that wasn't going to happen. Zuko carefully put the sachets down and reached for the cold teapot by the side of his desk. He'd just started to screw the lid off, however, when there was a quick knock at the door.

It was frightening how he knew who it was. Just by the knock. They hadn't yet decided on a prearranged signal, but somehow Zuko just _knew_. He leapt to his feet instantly and opened the door.

"Shen Li!"

The instant he saw him, the lethargy flew. Finally, something he could do properly. Something important, for his country. Something _real_. Zuko almost smiled as he stepped aside and let the guard captain in, closing the door behind him with anticipation. Less than a second passed after the lock clicked, he strode forwards excitedly. "Well, what happened?"

Shen Li blinked at him with tired eyes, and inclined his head. "My Lord," he said belatedly, like he was waking out of a stupor. Zuko started as he finally noticed the bruised eyes, the slightly swaying legs, and the sheer exhaustion on the man's face. Quickly, he swung his chair underneath Shen Li's buckling legs, and the guard captain sank into it gratefully and wet his lips.

Almost automatically, Zuko reached for an empty cup and the teapot. Shen Li downed the cold tea with a gulp, not even caring that the leaves followed the water on the way down. The drink seemed to shake him, and for the first time since he'd come in, he focused on Zuko's face.

"Thank you."

"Don't worry about it," Zuko said dismissively, walking around to lean against his desk and face the other youth. Now that Shen Li's more immediate needs had been tended to, he could get some answers. "Do you have news? How did the mission go? And..." for the first time, the semi-emptiness of the room struck him. "Where's Mai?"

Shen Li put up a tired hand. "Slow down, Fire Lord," he smiled weakly, and Zuko was not so excited that he didn't notice the dullness in the other's eyes. Instantly, elation turned into worry. Another thing he had missed, and its ramifications struck him. What could have gone wrong?

"Shen Li," he asked cautiously, " Are you all right?"

The guard captain stiffened, and then with a barely discernible effort, turned the dullness into neutrality. "Sorry, my Lord. I'm just tired. And wondering where to start."

Zuko folded his arms loosely across his chest, gravity now colouring his mood. There was no smile, not even a trace of it on the other's lips, and given his time with the other youth, that fact was disturbing. He quelled down the instant urge to panic. "The beginning is always good."

The corner of Shen Li's mouth lifted in a listless smile. For some reason, that scared Zuko more than if he'd just remained sober. "That it is," the guard captain agreed, and then breathed deeply. "All right then."

And so he told him. Told everything of objective importance to a captive, silent audience until he reached the part where Mai fell. And Zuko sucked in a heady breath. "What?!"

Shen Li put up his hand again. "It's all right, Fire Lord. She's alive. Just let me keep going."

Zuko worked his jaw convulsively, ready to open it again and demand instant answers. But as he did, his eyes brushed past Shen Li's darkened ones again, and he subsided. _She's alive_, he repeated to himself. _Alive, _and it only took a few seconds for him to nod again to Shen Li to continue.

And he did, and the Fire Lord listened; a sinking feeling slowly drawing all the hope away from his gut. So. They'd been right. Instinctively, he took a quick glance at the map on the floor, the blood-coloured soldiers still clumped together in the West of the island.

_Agni_.

"... then we pulled Lady Katara out of the river and went back to their..."

Zuko didn't know how far his mind had drifted into images of rebel soldiers coloured with blood, but then the name brought him rushing back to reality. "Katara! You found with Katara?"

Shen Li looked up at him, faintly surprised. "Well, I found Lady Katara with Lady Mai after she'd been hurt at one of the village attacks. It wasn't mortal though. It probably would have been, if she hadn't healed herself, but as it is, she only suffered blood loss. I left her with Lady Mai, safe. I expect she will be fine..."

Shen Li's words kept going - neutral and evenly paced like a soldier's report. But to Zuko, it felt like every syllable was an empty echo in his ears. _Katara. Hurt. Mortal. Blood loss. _His hands flew down to the desk to support him as he stared at the guard captain in horror. As if that look were enough to change everything, Shen Li stopped and regarded him back blankly, not a twitch on his face.

"Fire Lord, it's fine. I left her in Lady Mai's... with Lady Mai. She's stable."

Zuko's nails unconsciously dug into the wood. His voice came out in a whisper. "_Stable_?"

Shen Li eyed him strangely. "Better than stable," the guard captain amended finally. "Nothing a few days of rest and some good food won't fix."

"Agni."

Neither said anything for a while, Zuko in particular sinking into troubled thought as he breathed, as he pushed away the panic that had assaulted him and focused on digesting the other information. His own soldiers... _soldiers who attacked Katara... _he blinked, shook his head angrily and tried to focus again. His own soldiers, and... earthbenders.

He looked up abruptly into Shen Li's haunted eyes. "That can't be it," he said quietly. "There must be something more. What else happened?"

The guard captain sucked in a breath, and Zuko belatedly remembered the blankness that had been in his eyes. "Let it go, Zuko."

Zuko frowned. "Shen Li, if it's something important, I have to know. Any information about this all could be useful now. I..." he held back the words that rose first in his mind, surprise and suspicion swirling inside him. "I need to know."

Shen Li shook his head. "It's not important." At Zuko's look, he fell back further. "Look, I promise it's not important. It's got nothing to do with the mission. You don't have to worry about it, my Lord."

Potentially empty words, but the truth in Shen Li's face convinced him. At that, the suspicion vanished to be replaced by a faint, unjustified sense of hurt and Zuko's frown deepened. After all, it wasn't as if he had bared his heart or private life to the guard captain before. Still...

Maybe it was because he was lonely. Maybe it was because he too was tired. Maybe it was even that he was trying very hard to stay sane, to find some sort of balance in the process of tired court rituals and empty traditions holding him back from the changes he needed to make. But Zuko cast aside his normal reservations and went the extra step further.

Using the gentlest voice he could muster, he leaned forwards. "What's wrong, Shen Li?"

It was the furthest he'd ever gone. Ever reached. Zuko had always been more a reactive type when it had come to people; always waited warily for another to make the first move so that he could gauge where they were coming from. Except for Katara, of course - he'd actively tried to court her good favour after everything - that was the least she deserved after his betrayal. But this was a whole other game.

A game he felt crashing around him when the look on Shen Li's face twisted. "_Please_, Zuko."

At that the Fire Lord stopped still. It was only two words, but it stood between them and it was enough at that moment to highlight the warning. A warning that would stand until the other let it fall.

Zuko released a breath, as if he'd been branded, and nodded stiffly in both compassion and apology. Shen Li returned it with a silent gratitude. And with as little words, Zuko gestured towards the exit, Shen Li stood up slowly, bowed formally, opened the door and walked through.

And Zuko did not see, but the guard captain did not stop once he shut the door. He was tired, but he walked stiffly and quickly away from the Fire Lord's study as though it might burn him. Along the blood-red corridors he moved, until finally his step slowed and he paused.

To an untrained eye, he was alone in the corridor. The Fire Palace was vast, and had as many servants, nobles, and courtiers as flies. And yet, at this moment, there was a great stillness where he stood, as if for a stolen second, the place were empty.

And then his mouth lifted up in mirthless smile, and he stared hard at the crimson hangings.

"Hello, father."

* * *

There was no one there.

That was the first thing that struck them as they snuck around the edges, as they skirted ever closer to the yawning gap that was the cavern mouth. Every time a rabbit-mole breathed in the near vicinity, they had to bite their lips to keep from jumping. But there was no one there.

Odd. Bizarre. Frightening. There should have at least been a sentry, at least something. It was a military operation, after all - that much had been made clear by their previous encounters. Instead, there was nothing, no one, and finally Katara grew impatient from her nerves and stepped out into the open before Mai could stop her.

For a second, their breath caught in time as something snapped. Katara whirled with her water outstretched, prepared to pluck the expected arrows out of the air. But instead, a rabbit-mole bolted out of the bushes and away, and the two girls were left again, with nothing.

Katara turned to the trees. "Mai! What's going on?"

The noblewoman stepped out irately. "How should I know?" she snapped. "All I know is that that was possibly the stupidest thing I have ever seen someone do. I thought you said we were going to do this stealthily!"

Katara put her hands on her hips. "Well maybe, but to be stealthy you need someone to be there to be stealthy around in the first place!" she waved her arm at the cave. "No one's home!"

Mai drew back and pursed her lips. "Or maybe no-one's just out front," she said. "Keep your voice down and we'll go in. _Stealthily_."

The look Katara shot back at her wasn't worth mentioning. The two girls glared at each other for a bit, and then almost naturally fell into formation. Katara took the lead, a small ball of water playing in her hands, and Mai stepped behind with an eye on their backs. And then they took a shared deep breath and entered.

The caves were painfully dark inside, each step devoid of vision. Katara found herself wishing that Zuko was there. It was funny, how he'd only been with them for the last few weeks, and yet she'd gotten so used to his ability to light up the dark that she now took it for granted.

Well, that was something that was certainly going to change. Katara found herself glancing desperately around for a stick, a branch - for anything that they could remotely cobble together into a torch, and then found herself staring into Mai's slitted eyes. She stepped back a bit, startled, before realising that the noblewoman's golden gaze wasn't directed at her. Instead, Mai seemed to be concentrating on something in the dimness, a small object in her hand. Katara frowned as she tried to discern its shape. She hadn't made time yet to have a look at the new supplies that Shen Li had left with them. But then it didn't matter anymore, as a small glow of light appeared in the darkness and their way was finally lit.

Well, partially, anyway.

Katara's first thought from the way the unsteady torch in Mai's hand flickered with such a small radius was that the walls drank brightness. But then, as their eyes slowly adjusted, she realised that the cave was just spectacularly massive. Behind the deceptively medium-sized opening, the system expanded rapidly. The first cavern they were in now stretched far beyond the flickerings of their light, and as they spun around with it, saw the passages branching off, Katara felt a small prickling of fear.

"Mai," she whispered quietly. "Mai, what if we get lost?"

The Fire Nation girl's lips tightened. She marched over to the wall of the cavern and began moving along it, perusing it and the floor intently whenever she reached another passage into deeper darkness. Curious, Katara hitched up her flagging strength and followed.

"What are you doing?"

"We've been attacked by mostly by firebenders," she explained crisply, leaning down to examine the rock at her feet closer. "And chances are that if we get lost, they would have gotten lost at the beginning too. That is, if they decided not to use the standard Fire Nation military system of marking in dangerous terrain."

Katara raised an eyebrow. "Standard Fire Nation military system of marking?"

The light bobbed down, and then Mai nodded at the floor in triumph. Bending closer, Katara saw a set of characters scorched into the rock itself. 'Prison'.

"Oh," the waterbender grinned. "How convenient."

Mai said nothing, only standing straight as she turned to move into the passage indicated. Katara followed close behind, her eyes on that speck of light in Mai's hands as they went deeper and deeper into the caves. Soon, she couldn't tell how far they'd gone - the blackness seemed to have devoured time, just as it devoured the edges of their torch. And so she couldn't say how long it was before they stumbled across their goal.

"Oh La!" Katara rushed forwards as the light fell upon the row of shackles. The five occupants sat against the wall, their hands and ankles useless, and she turned immediately to the first one in concern. In the flicker of the torch, their skin seemed gray. "La, are you all right?"

But before Katara could say anything else, or the prisoner could reply, Mai pushed her aside and crouched down.

"Are you Zuko's scouts?" she asked bluntly, her hand held high to illuminate the man's face. He nodded frantically in the dim light, the effect sending distorted shadows bouncing across the wall.

"Yes! Yes..." he gulped for air. "Yes, we were sent here by Fire Lord Zuko. Agni... I thought we'd never be found."

Katara glared at the back of Mai's head, and nudged the noblewoman aside again. "We'll, you're among friends now," she said kindly, reaching forth to study his restraints. "What's your name?"

She didn't notice, because she was looking at his chains. But Mai saw, and wondered whether her sight was playing tricks on her when the man's eyes bulged for a second, and then settled down to a look of eerie calmness.

"My name is Ling," he said, smiling. "These are my friends, and we have urgent news to report to the Fire Lord."

Katara nodded absentmindedly, and shifted away to look for the keys. Mai snorted and stood up, unnerved by the change. "Well, it's good to know this all wasn't a total waste," she muttered. "But there's one problem. We've only got one basilisk, and there's five of you."

Katara's voice floated back in the darkness. "Oh, that's easy. We can walk back, and they can..."

"No," Mai cut her off abruptly, her eyes narrowed as she glanced down at the scouts. None of the others had moved, except to follow Ling's example, and so the torch at her shoulder only illuminated their bodies. "I have my own report to make to the Fire Lord, and you've only just healed."

She waited for the response, her senses tingling and her mind testing. Across from her, she could feel Katara tense, scowl, but then relax as the logic of it caved in. But in front of her, the scouts seemed as inscrutable as ever.

Finally one spoke. And although she couldn't see it now that the light had moved, he was still smiling.

"Just get us out of here," Ling said in that same, calm voice. "And we'll handle the rest."

* * *

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A/N II: Thanks again to all of you who waited so patiently. And for everyone whose reviews I haven't responded to yet - again, my apologies - I've been pretty caught up in trying to make sure I at least got this chapter up. So rest assured I'll be in contact, and please review! Your thoughts, comments, and feedback are like nectar for the Gods (and insecure writers :P)


	23. Heart set Blind

**Chapter 23: Heart set Blind**

Disclaimer: I own nothing, don't sue.

A/N I: Ugh, I'm sorry for the wait again. A new fandom has caught my eye recently and demanded that I write for it (by the way, I really, really REALLY recommend the new Prince of Persia game, if that kind of pasttime is your thing), and so I've had to follow the call. Rest assured, though, that that shouldn't impede with future chapters of Alchemy! I fully intend to finish this story, as well as to keep avidly writing for Avatar.

So thanks for your patience, and I hope you enjoy!

* * *

_Heart cracking,_

_Heart set,_

_Heart with future met,_

_But eyes shall stay blind 'til you see them._

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* * *

  
_

The morning light was a dim glow at the horizon, a shining disk that promised to unfurl as the day grew older. Beneath it, its streaks of gold and fire lit up the rows of craggy pinnacles ahead of them, the mountains slumbering giants to the sun's wakening caress. Aang inhaled the clean, sweet scent of the air at this altitude and smiled softly at the way the sun stroked the leaves of the trees below. Even with all the ugliness he had seen, there was still so much beauty in this world. And even though there was something special in his connection with people through his role as the Avatar and his self as Aang, there was always something else about the natural beauty of earth that sung to him as an Air Nomad.

A muttered snore rent the peaceable silence, the sound brought a smile to Aang's face. Casting one more glance at the beautiful sight around him - brilliantly clouded skies, growing sun, shadowed green mountains, he turned to regard his last human companion. A small twinge raked his heart at the thought. He knew it was stupid; Team Avatar would be together soon enough after everything quieted down. But still, he couldn't help but sigh.

Then again, there was always a light to the shadow, a blessing to the loss. Toph's quiet snores barely disturbed the pristine atmosphere around them as they soared high above the steepled tops and their low hanging trees. And as the Last Airbender, Aang could appreciate silence.

His gaze focused. His earthbending teacher was so small in the vast emptiness of that saddle. She lay curled up against the side, Momo wrapped around her shoulders and draping his warmth against her chest. Occasionally, his ears dangled a little too far and brushed her nose, and she gave a quiet snort of discontent and turned over a little. Aang smiled again. Well, perhaps he wasn't so alone.

Perhaps it was enough.

Turning back, Aang settled his gaze once again on the soaring peaks ahead. It was funny, he thought, how all the Air Temples had always been built on mountains. Of course, it made sense; the high pinnacles of stone were only the means to the end of being surrounded by air, serenity and peace. And yet, now that he thought about it, it also seemed somehow ironic that airbenders made their home on the greatest natural triumph of their opposite element. Somehow strange that the monks striving for earthly detachment would find their enlightenment on top of the earth itself.

Huh. Aang could feel something niggling at the back of his mind, like an epiphany waiting to be discovered, but he shrugged it off and directed Appa ahead. It had been quite a travel, and he was tired. And if it was important, the Guru would likely bring it up, maybe in plainer language that he could understand. Just like he had...

"_If you leave now, you won't be able to get into the Avatar state at all!" _

The remembered words rung like an echo in his mind. He winced, and before he could stop it, their sound triggered off a flood of images as well.

_Azula's lightning. The rock at his back. The times of certainty couple with the times of terror. A fully realised Avatar... and yet also an unbalanced one. In control. Not in control. Katara in chains..._

Aang swallowed, feeling his skin prickle. Perhaps this hadn't been a good idea after all. Almost unconsciously, his hands began to nudge at Appa's reins, steering them back towards the City of Walls and Secrets.

And then there was a giant sneeze.

Out of shock, Aang's hands jerked back straight. Appa groaned slightly in irritation and readjusted his flight. From the saddle, a string of muttered curses began.

"Alright, that's _enough_ you ball of fluff! Aargh, Twinkletoes, how can you stand this?"

Aang turned, consciously shoving away his darker thoughts to the back of his head. "Stand what, Sifu Toph?"

"Momo's _hair_!" The lemur in question chittered innocently. "It... it tickles and it..." Toph growled, and shook a finger in the direction of a puffy cloud. "Just stay away from me next time, you hear?"

Aang watched with amusement as Momo cocked his head, as if considering her order. And then, with a happy chirrup, he leapt back to curl around her shoulders.

Toph howled in outrage. Aang laughed his head off. Momo purred as the earthbender's grubby hands gradually stopped trying to beat him off and instead began grudgingly stroking him. A string of muttered curses lit the air once more, and Aang grinned, feeling more lighthearted than he had in days. "Oh, come off it Toph. We all know you love him."

"Yeah?" the little earthbender grumbled. "He comes near my face when I'm sleeping again, and I'll show him love."

The scowl on her face was ruined by Momo sliding over the edge of her hair and patting down her fringe, and the sight of them set Aang off into a fit of chuckles again. Toph rudely shoved the lemur back up, contemplated her words a little, and then wrinkled her nose. "Solid ground would help too. How far away are we anyway, Twinkletoes? I kinda lost track of time while I was napping."

Instantly, the Avatar sobered. Twisting back to the front, he saw with a start that the range that had seemed distant before had somehow grown bigger during his distraction.

Much bigger.

Aang swallowed. "Not that far," he said weakly, trying to inject some cheerfulness in his voice. He knew that the long air journeys were always harder on his earthbending teacher. A renewed surge of gratefulness for her presence nestled in his chest, but it didn't manage to dislodge the growing nervousness inside his stomach. "In fact, we should probably be there soon."

"Great," Toph yawned, turning back to cushion her head against her folded arms. "I'll finally be able to see soon." She paused. "Are you okay, Twinkles?"

The change was so abrupt that Aang nearly fell off his perch. Almost. As it was, he jerked around to face her impassive face again. But her blind eyes gave nothing away as he shook, and it was with a quelling breath that he tried to still himself.

"Just fine," he said, a big fake smile perched on his face. He didn't know to whose benefit it was, since Katara, Sokka and Zuko weren't present. But it sure made him feel better, and since they weren't on the ground, she couldn't tell if he was lying anyway.

Toph crossed her arms, and he immediately disabused himself of that notion. "Suuuure, Twinkletoes," she drawled. "Now seriously, tell me what's up. I don't want to have to beat it out of you."

Aang swallowed, turned away again, and faced the mountains. They would be landing soon, if he didn't change their course. He wondered what to say. If Sokka and Suki had been here, he knew he would have been able to bluff them. Zuko was a different matter, but he usually respected privacy. As for Katara - Aang's chest constricted a little as he remembered all those times that her beautiful blue eyes had brightened with hope and she'd patted his shoulder. He swallowed. For someone who he loved, he sure had a hard time telling her his problems, sometimes.

Aang sighed. Well, none of them were with him now. Only Toph. Toph, who he'd never been able to bluff, and who wouldn't hesitate to follow through on her threat if he tried to evade her.

What way was left but honesty? The decision, once made, surprised him with the peace it left in his wake. Toph wouldn't judge. She wouldn't look at him as if he'd just crushed all her hope in the world. She would bluntly assess the situation and tell him straight off whether he was wrong or right, or what he should do in her eyes.

That sort of solidity felt comforting, right now. Especially when he felt like the balance within him was veering out of control.

So he took a deep breath and told the truth.

Toph didn't bat an eyelid as he spoke, his back to her and his eyes on the mountains as if they were his death sentence. He told her about his first visit. About opening the chakras. She listened silently as he told her of his blocks of fear, guilt, and illusions. And then, when he reached the part where it had been so easy to lie to Sokka, she didn't flinch when he told the bare and unadulterated facts.

She listened soundlessly until the end. And it was only when he finished, and his head dropped with bleakness, that she replied.

"So basically, you're telling me that you could have saved Ba Sing Se if you'd stayed? That you could have stopped this all long before the comet?"

Her tone was neutral, and that was what saved him. Instead of bursting out in defense, Aang lowered his head in his own shame. "It was... hard, Toph," he said quietly. "I wasn't ready. I wasn't even ready up until a few days ago. I... was it fair to ask me to let go of Katara?" his head suddenly raised again, and his gray eyes burned with stubbornness. "It wasn't fair. It wasn't! They.... they tried to take so much from me. Gyatso. My childhood. Everything. And then they ask me to save the world when I'm not ready, and try to take away the only person that meant something to me! The girl who brought me to life, who gave me hope again! It wasn't fair, it _wasn't_!"

So lost was he in his anger, in the helpless feeling of frustration welling up in his stomach, that he barely heard Toph speak. But when she did, it was with such a flat, odd tone that he immediately snapped to attention.

"The only person that meant something, huh?" Toph cocked her head, her voice no longer neutral. "Gee, Aang. Nothing's ever fair."

_Aang_. Instantly, he knew they were treading on different ground, and his anger at the world faded to caution. "Uh, Toph?"

He turned to meet her blank eyes, and for once, they chilled him. But even as he quailed, she softened, and he felt the difference like wind over the mountains. "Look, Twinkles. I know things have been rough for you, and now you're scared and guilty about going back to this Guru. But come on, think about it. If he's so enlightened, he'll forgive you, right?"

The constriction in his chest loosened a little. "Yeah... I guess."

"Plus, you're coming back because you know he'll be able to help you, right?"

An unwilling smile formed at the corner of his lips. "Right."

"Then there's no problem," she shrugged and lay down again, her sightless eyes to the sky. "Wake me up when we get there."

Aang stared at her. There was something different in the air between them now, something a little more distant, and he didn't like it. If only he could put his finger on it, though...

Her last words hit him, and he turned just as Appa let out a moan of relief and sunk onto stone. Quickly, Aang scrambled to his feet and looked up at the temple in front of him. At its remembered sight, the guilt and fear sunk through him again, and he wavered.

"Toph?" he asked uncertainly.

Her body tensed. "What?"

Funnily enough, her voice was enough to bring him back to earth. Aang took a deep breath, and then sighed as he scanned the premises and saw a little brown figure, high up in the temple, sitting motionlessly in the lotus position.

"We're here."

* * *

"How much longer?"

Her voice was whipped away by wind and the crunch of basilisk claws in the grass, but since her arms were tightly linked around her companion's shoulders as they rode, she was heard.

"At least five hours," Mai replied, her voice clipped and her golden eyes straight ahead and scanning the horizon. "Try to relax. It's going to be a long ride."

Katara sighed, and tried to listen. Her arms and fingers felt like lead as she clung on for dear life, their passage blowing cold wind in her face. Around them, the Fire Nation landscape sped past as they went, the flowers and grass of the plains bled bright of colour by the night. Distantly, they could hear the rustle of prey and predator amongst the stems, but mostly everything was drowned out by the wind and the sound of the basilisk's claws springing on the turf.

As Katara focused on the wideness of the plains, of the openness, she found herself beginning to relax. They'd made it out of the forest not that long ago, their passage suspiciously undisturbed. Katara had felt the rigidity of Mai's body in front of her for every step they took on the forest paths, as if the noblewoman were just waiting for an ambush.

In truth, she had been too. But she'd been too weary, too tired to do much but try to keep her guard up. She sagged in the saddle, even as she tried not to lean too much on the girl in front of her and give her weakness away. But it was hard. Her body hadn't yet had time to replenish itself or her blood, the surge of near-miraculous healing draining her of her last reserves. The twelve hour bout of unconsciousness hadn't helped as much as it should have either. To top it all off, they had broken into the camp of their enemy and found Zuko's scouts less than three hours after she'd woken.

So. She was absolutely exhausted. Katara closed her eyes and tried to keep herself steady, berating herself for having pushed so hard to reach the caves. It wasn't as if one more night would have hurt them. As it was, it had taken every inch of adrenaline and strength to get in when it had ended up being a simple walk-in-and-free operation.

She hated to think what would have happened if the camp had actually been occupied.

Katara sighed, resolutely pushed the horrifying image away, and tried to mentally gauge the time. She hazarded a bleak guess that they'd been riding for less than an hour and groaned. By Mai's calculations, it would take at least the rest of the night to ride back to the gleaming capitol of the Fire Nation. Five more hours to go, and she was already exhausted.

Katara closed her eyes briefly. La, she wasn't sure if she could even make it that far. It was still taking strength to hold on - strength that was ebbing away much faster than she would have liked. Inwardly she cursed herself again for pushing herself so hard, but she was much too proud to ask Mai to stop.

For now, at least. Katara felt her muscles groan, and wondered which would give out first. Pride she had in abundance, she knew, but that also had to be matched up with her common sense. The sense which was whispering, ghostly in her ear and sounding suspiciously like Yue, that she'd be useless if she fell off the basilisk and broke her neck.

Katara blinked. That image was _not_ appealing.

"Uh... Mai?" she crept closer, trying to crane her neck to reach the noblewoman's ear even as she firmly and resolutely squashed down her pride. "Could we... rest?"

For a moment, she thought the other girl hadn't heard her. But then Mai's face swung to meet her own, and she saw the tightness in it melt to scrutiny.

And... and was that... guilt?

No. It was gone as quickly as it came, and so she must have imagined it. Mai's features smoothed over into an impassive mask, and she jerked her head in a nod before turning back and pulling on the basilisk's reins. Katara breathed a sigh of relief and forgot about the moment as she slid to the ground.

Mai followed soon after, her sharp gaze assessing. "We don't need a fire," she said abruptly, walking the basilisk over to a low-lying shrub and tethering him there. "It's warm enough as is."

"Yeah," Katara nodded, moving wearily over. "Just our bedrolls will do. Here..."

"No," the other girl spun around. "Go sit down. You look like death decided to bleed on you."

Katara's jaw dropped, but her body had other ideas as her legs collapsed beneath her. "Uh... thanks?"

Mai said nothing. Katara watched as she opened the bags with an almost detached viciousness, pulling out the two bedrolls from their separate packs and laying them in the grass. Katara crawled into hers gratefully as Mai turned back, going through their belongings with a single-minded determination as she began to hunt for sustenance. Soon enough, a pack of rations and a water bottle joined their rolls on the ground. And it was only then that Mai sat down across from her, her drawn face showing her own tiredness, and the two girls reached for the food together.

They ate in silence for a while, Katara taking slow, measured sips of water as her body readjusted once more. The quiet, slightly relaxed atmosphere spoke the volumes that both girls could not. In their shared acknowledgement of tiredness, they realised that they'd both been pushing themselves and each other too much. After all, both had tasted near death in the last few days, and yet they had fought, run, and rescued as if nothing had happened.

After everything, the adrenaline was beginning to wear off. Katara groaned as she felt the tiredness catch up to her, as everything crashed down like a tsunami. Even before her blood loss, she'd been pushed to the limits with her solo war. The exhaustion wrote itself across her face now as she settled down, and the other girl caught it.

"Are you all right?" Mai asked abruptly.

Katara's eyes flew open in surprise, just in time to catch a mirrored look of shock on the noblewoman's face. _Hmm. Interesting. _She smiled wearily to put the other girl at ease.

"I'll live," she said wryly, feeling the weight of her body pull down in her bones. "I mean, it's not as if I haven't been doing this the past week. Or the past year, for that matter," she tilted her head and chuckled in faint realisation. "Then again, I must admit that it wasn't often I fought one against twelve while I was with Aang."

"One against twelve?" Mai's eyebrow lifted. "That hardly seems like good odds."

Katara chuckled dryly. "Oh, I know. Believe me, I know. And they just got _better_."

The tone in the waterbender's voice left little to the imagination. Mai thought first of twelve, then fifteen, then twenty... and her eyes narrowed even as her wavering instincts confirmed Katara was not lying.

So she said the only thing she could. "How?"

And whatever she'd been expecting, she hadn't expected this. Katara's smile froze on her face, and then it melted into a light frown as she bit her lip. Mai watched with interest as the transformation continued, as her eyes went dark and her hands twisted unconsciously in her lap.

"That's right, you... you didn't see it in the last battle," she said, almost reflectively. "I didn't even have time before they sprung the trap."

Mai's ears perked and she leaned forwards.

"And you haven't seen it before. No one has except... except Sokka, Aang, and Zuko. But, you see..."

She took a deep, quelling breath. "I'm a waterbender."

After the build-up, the statement seemed rather anti-climatic. Mai snorted. "Gee, I never would have guessed," she said dryly.

Katara flushed. "No, that's not what I meant. I..." she sighed and buried her face in her hands for a moment. When she looked up again, her blue eyes were luminescent. "I'm not explaining very well."

"You're telling me."

Katara shot her an irritated look. Mai stared blandly right back at her, the question mark still hovering over her face. The waterbender looked away first with a sigh.

"Okay, uh, how about I describe it this way. Waterbenders bend water, right?"

Mai didn't even deign that with a comment. Katara flushed again, and hurried on.

"We-ell... it's like, water's in lots of things. If you're a strong enough waterbender, you can bend not just the water in the river, but also the water inside plants, or even the water inside air!"

Mai digested that, her face remaining neutral. The possibilities were interesting, certainly. More than she would have guessed. Still, she didn't see how that could be relevant to fighting off a whole company of trained Firebending soldiers unless...

Unless...

Katara took a deep breath, and this time Mai took one unconsciously with her. "Or in my case, even the water inside blood. Bloodbending."

Time seemed to shift in stasis. In front of her, Mai saw the truth in Katara's expressive face, the conflict that still warred within her, but she did not try to analyse it. The turmoil on the waterbender's features suggested that she had only recently come to terms with her frightening power, but Mai wasn't interested in ideological debates. Instead, a question which had lurked in her mind for a while resurfaced.

When she spoke, it was calmly, and her golden eyes were blank. "So," she asked, "Is that how you killed Azula?"

Katara flinched. "No!" she protested vehemently, before the memories swept over her, into her and through her. And then she sank down into herself. "Actually I guess it was," she said quietly. "I - it was one of the moves I used to bring her down."

Mai nodded and regarded the girl distantly, not quite sure what to say next. After all, how was she supposed to respond to that? To the anguish now bleeding out through Katara's face? She checked through her Court repertoire - false sympathy, irritation, threat, fake amusement... none of them fit. She sifted through them again with growing annoyance, but found nothing.

Mai took a breath. She stilled herself, and then cast away the rules. And when the words came, they surprised her.

"I would have killed her. For Zuko."

Her lips tasted dry. Her throat was parched. Katara's head snapped up at the sound and she laughed shortly. "I _did_ kill her," the waterbender said. "For Zuko."

Something in her voice made Mai's mind catch. Unbidden, she felt her eyebrow raise as she remembered the little that Ty Lee had told her. "I thought she was about to kill you at the time?'

Katara paused. "That too," she amended, resting her chin on her hands. The movement didn't take her out of range of Mai's arresting look, and the question mark in it was enough to stir up a vague memory in the waterbender's mind. When it finally clicked, she sat up with a start.

"You... you're his girlfriend, aren't you?" Katara stammered. "The one Sokka told me about."

The question was innocent, but suddenly Mai's mood turned black and she swung away. "I wasn't aware that Zuko dumping me was such common knowledge," she said darkly, realising that that made no sense even as it came out of her mouth. But it didn't seem to matter; the effect was pronounced enough. Katara's eyes went huge and she quickly scrambled over to place a hand across the other girl's fingers.

"Oh, I'm so sorry..."

Mai pushed Katara off without thinking. There was a half-second delay, and then the waterbender's eyes clouded and the noblewoman felt like cursing. "Don't be," she said thickly. The words sounded lame to her own ears, and nowhere near enough to assuage to sting of her instinctual rejection. She bit her lip, annoyed at herself for even talking about Zuko, let alone feeling awkward in the aftermath of her actions. What was this? Feeling in prison and afterwards had been one thing, but this... ever since she had woken up properly from her near-drowning, things had seemed so sharp and clear in their confusion. It was as if the waterbender was magnetic, drawing feelings to her like rain. Feelings that Mai still wasn't quite sure how to deal with. "It wasn't your fault."

Katara chewed her lip and looked down. "Still..." she faltered sadly, before looking up again with renewed determination. "If it makes you feel better, I think he really cares about you."

Mai didn't move, but somewhere inside her, something broke with irrevocable finality. "It doesn't matter now."

Although the rejection of a few moments ago was still fresh, Katara moved again, this time to just sit closer. "Hey, don't think like that!" she chided Mai gently. There was a pause between her next sentence, as if she was unsure for a moment, and then she recovered and forged ahead once more. "If it is love, then I'm sure you two will find a way."

Mai said nothing. Love. Love. She'd thought the same kind of things once, when she was a young girl with ribbons in her hair. And then again when she'd lain down in her bed for the first time in three years knowing that he was home. Hah. Love. That word had taken on far too many meanings for her when, so soon after, she'd woken up with a letter on her table. A _letter_.

Katara didn't seem to notice her companion's brewing thoughts. Her eyes were wide and only faintly tainted, and a small laugh suddenly bubbled up unbidden in her throat. "Besides, it's Zuko we're talking about," she reminded herself drolly. "If he feels, then he _feels_."

"That's the problem," Mai suddenly said, surprising herself. "It's not about what he feels. It's about what I feel. What I _felt_."

Katara stared at her uncertainly. "But I thought... at the Boiling Rock... you love him."

Mai remembered the heat, remembered the whirring of the gondolas and the dreadful noise of the saws. She remembered seeing him again, seeing the sorrow and stubbornness written on his face, seeing his eyes after he'd locked her in the cell, and then again when their gazes had bypassed steam and distance and air to meet. And Mai let a slow, knife-like curve lift her lips. "You know what they say about love."

Katara looked at her blankly. She remembered many Water Tribe sayings; ones that spoke about love using the sweet warmth of light against the brutal reality of ice, and ones that talked about the flickers of flame that made life possible and worth living amongst the snow. Try as she might, she couldn't think of any that would invite _that_ kind of smile.

Mai saw her bewildered glance and the smile grew more bittersweet. "'Relationships are like glass. Sometimes it's better to leave them broken than try to hurt yourself putting it back together'," she shook her head. "I don't know who said that. But it works for me."

She raised her eyes to meet Katara's limpid ones, saw the waterbender begin to open her mouth to comfort her, and cut her off. "Look, let's just say that I'm glad we stopped," she said abruptly. "I don't want to go back to the capitol, not just yet."

The words rung unspoken between them, and Katara nodded in understanding. The wound was still too fresh, too raw for her to be poking around there, and there was only so much healing she could do. And so she followed the other girl's lead. "To be honest, I don't either," she admitted. "I mean, I left so suddenly. I'm worried that it's not time to go back, or that going back will mean trouble, and yet I know that I also have to. That it's time."

The surprised recognition on Mai's face was enough to tell Katara that she wasn't the only one, and as she looked closer, the sudden sliver of vulnerability in Mai's eyes that she saw made her brave. Unthinking, she reached out again, this time to put her hand on the Fire Nation girl's shoulder. Mai started, but this time she did not push away, and Katara smiled.

They had a chequered, distant history. They had completely different backgrounds. They had the beginnings of a new and cautious friendship. "You know," Katara said gently, "You're not alone."

Mai's eyes widened fractionally, narrowed, and then relaxed. And what she said next surprised both of them.

"You know," she said dryly, but Katara was beginning to understand that that was just how Mai spoke, "Neither are you."

No more words had to be said. The two girls shared a look of implicit understanding, a far cry from the antagonists they'd been, and when the sun rose on their sleeping forms in the morning, both had a miniscule smile tracing their lips.

* * *

Climbing the temple was easy - it was a matter of leaping randomly upwards, searching desperately for a handhold when gravity tugged him down once again, and then gleefully surging upwards once more as he found his ground. Aang laughed out loud as he ascended, playing the ancient stone around him like a game as he hopped and skipped from one step to another. The distraction was welcome, so welcome, and for a moment he forgot exactly to whom he was headed, and who he was leaving behind to explore the rest of the Temple with Appa.

Still, the distraction was short lived. Soon he was standing on the same floor, his eyes inexorably drawn to the small brown figure still sitting in that lotus position. His presence looked and felt so ageless that for a moment, Aang was overwhelmed.

But he was Aang. Avatar Aang. The Avatar at twelve, and he had long ago learnt to carry his responsibilities on his shoulders.

Aang stepped forwards. It was one of the hardest steps he'd ever taken. And when he finished stepping, when his unwilling feet and unswaying will brought him closer, Pathik spoke.

"Congratulations, Avatar," the old guru said, his eyes still closed. "I see you have completed the first step in defeating Fire Lord Ozai."

His first instinct was to smile. He had to admit he was surprised - it was not the welcome he'd expected. Aang beamed, feeling his heart swell at the praise, but then the rest of the sentence bowled him over. "Wait, did you just say that defeating Ozai was the _first_ _step_?"

"Of course," the guru said amiably, like he was talking about the weather. "You have not restored balance yet."

Aang's jaw dropped. For at least half a minute, he stood there, staring incredulously at the meditator in front of him. And then he snapped, pitifully.

"You mean there's _more_?"

The guru breathed calmly, inhaling once, and then exhaling gracefully. His eyes remained closed. "Of course. You didn't think it could be as easy as that, did you?"

This time, Aang squeaked.

"_Easy_?"

Pathik laughed, so lightly and without malicious intent that even in his annoyance, Aang couldn't feel angry. "Just kidding."

Aang stopped stone still. Inside, he was dimly aware of an interesting mix of incredulous anger and bittersweet hurt churning inside him, and the combination was enough to make him sick. But then the Guru opened his eyes, and he looked into dark, serious chips of amber.

"But there is more, Avatar Aang," he said, and his thin, reedy voice somehow sounded as deep and black as the mountains. "_Much_ more."

Aang blinked. As if that voice were magic, he was suddenly cast back into a memory - one he'd tried to forget, and the images that overwhelmed him were impossible.

_Three old men sitting around a blocky table. One old woman with her hands clawing at the rain. Two young girls dancing through blasts of fire, the first sleek with water and the other sharp as steel. A mask of blackened flesh that crumbled away to reveal a scar. The earth shifting beneath feet to crush someone's bones to powder. The marching of soldiers' feet over soil and rock, inexorable and deadly. The smell of smoke and burning. Fire. Earth. Water. A child screaming. Someone laughing..._

His frozen insides turned to water, and his stiff knees buckled. Aang stumbled forwards a little before catching himself, his voice caught in his throat. And when he finally managed to work his mouth around the block, he could only trust himself to say four words.

Four, pitiful words.

"Where do I start?"

Pathik's eyes were as fathomless as the mountains. "Right here," he said, gesturing to the ground next to him. "Sit, Aang, and we will begin your next lesson."

* * *

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A/N II - Thanks again for your patience, and for your lovely, lovely, much appreciated reviews. See you again next week. :)


	24. Near

**Chapter 24: Near**

Disclaimer: I'm sure you've gotten the point already. Not mine, just playing, don't sue.

A/N I: Just a quick note to say a massive THANK YOU! to all the awesome reviewers who let me know their thoughts last chapter. You all rock, and this chapter came out for you. :)

* * *

_The road is hard,_

_The map unclear,_

_The only truth;_

_A struggle's near._

* * *

Aang sat. The ground was as hard as last time, the rock solid and sore under his tailbone. Aang sighed, wiggled a little in a vain attempt to get comfortable, and wondered whether he should bend himself a more comfortable seat. Somehow, he doubted the guru would approve. And to be honest, it wasn't _that_ bad. Just... different.

"So," Aang said, trying to sound cheerful. "What's this about restoring balance?"

The guru smiled, his light, lilting voice a perfect accompaniment to his twinkling eyes. "Well, it's all very simple, really. You have to restore balance first in yourself, and then in the world." He chuckled at the look on the little monk's face. "When you're done, you'll have time for a holiday I'm sure."

Aang shook his head. "Whoah, whoah, okay. Let's take this one step at a time, shall we? So I have to restore balance in myself. How?"

Pathik's beard formed a curve underneath his lips. "Well, what feels _un_balanced at the moment?"

Well, wasn't that the question of questions? Aang's sigh felt like it grew all the way from his toes. "I don't know," he admitted. "I can't really describe it. It's just... when I got the Avatar State back, after I fought Ozai, I felt so calm. So certain. So _sure_." He scratched the back of his head. "I guess I felt balanced. But then coming back to meet my friends... finding out Azula... died, and the troubles in the Fire Nation already... it was as if all the uncertainty came bubbling back out of a little hole somewhere in me. And now I don't know what to do. Sometimes I feel like I'm totally with it, you know?"

He looked up instinctively to search the Guru's eyes, saw the understanding in there, and then ploughed ahead. "And then other times... I feel like I'm being torn apart. I don't know what to do. And it's bad, because I mean, I've often not known what I had to do. But I was still sure, you know? I still believed I could do it. My... friends, believed I could do it. But when I'm like this, I don't know what to believe. And then when everyone comes running to me with their problems, and I reach inside me to try to find that... stability I found after the fight with Ozai... it feels shaky, somehow."

Pathik nodded. "You have not yet grounded your newfound power, Aang. You have not brought what you unconsciously know into your conscious."

Aang blinked. "What does that even _mean_?"

The Guru allowed himself a faint smile, but when he spoke next, the abrupt change left Aang reeling.

"Do you remember when you fought at Ba Sing Se? After you left here?"

_Left_. Aang winced. _Such a kind way to put it_, he thought, but then he focused back on the question itself. And with the memory, his eyes widened and he swallowed.

"I died."

Guru Pathik nodded, as if things like that happened everyday. "Go on."

Aang swallowed again. "It was..." he shivered instinctively, feeling flashes of the scar tissue on his back, the green lights of the crystal cave, the shock of lightning as it shattered his world. "It was the weakest I've ever been," he whispered. "The entire fight, I felt so... out of it. It was like I was fighting in someone else's body. Even before I fought with Azula, I was losing. To Zuko. _Zuko_."

The guru raised his eyebrow at the emphasis, and Aang hastened to explain. "I mean, it's not like Zuko's bad or anything. In fact, what am I saying? He's great! We've always fought on almost equal grounds, at least until the end when I was getting closer to mastering all four elements. But that one fight... he was wiping the ground with me."

The Guru nodded again. "But then you almost managed to get into the Avatar State. What happened?"

The pathos of his memories was abruptly stoppered by shock. "What happened? But you know that. Azula shot me with lightning." He paused, thinking, and then plunged ahead with the questions racing in his mind. "Why is this relevant, anyway?" The memories were beginning to stir up old, hurt, angry thoughts, and he rolled with their power. "I've got the Avatar State now." _Because you were wrong. _"I just need this... balance thing."

Faced with the challenge, Pathik remained serene. "Yes, it is true that you can phase in and out of the Avatar State at will. But it is only sometimes, yes? When you are feeling what you said; stability and balance?"

Aang nodded grudgingly.

"Well then, I think the problem is this. To reach the Avatar State, you surrendered yourself to the universe. Something within you broke free of your blocks. But now, the rest of you is holding it back. You are in a struggle against yourself, Avatar - the part of you that knows the truth, and the other part that wishes to hide from the truth. To bring balance to yourself once more... you must let go and submit freely to a world without illusions..."

He paused, significantly, and Aang felt a chill come over him before he spoke. "And without earthly attachments."

_Green light. The swirl of the Earth Kingdom emblem. Katara. Katara in chains. Katara in trouble. Katara so beautiful. _Aang squeezed his eyes shut. He was seriously beginning to regret coming here now. All of the pathos that had formed at the end of the last visit was resurfacing, and the strength of its memory was washing away the peace and knowledge he had found beforehand. "But how can letting go of love be a _good_ thing?" Aang shook his head, despair and anger written on his face. "Avatar Yang-Chen told me that my connection to the world meant I shouldn't try to ascend to enlightenment. Basically, that I shouldn't have to remove myself from all earthly attachments, or else I couldn't do my job!"

For a moment, surprise flickered across the Guru's face. "It is not an earthly attachment to love, Aang. To care for the people you protect."

That was it. Aang clutched his head and yelled in frustration. "Aargh! Then why did I have to let go of Katara? I don't understand!"

For a moment, in the darkness of Pathik's eyes, he thought he caught a glimpse of the stars. "I said that you had to let go, that you had to forget your earthly attachments. Only then would the cosmic energy flow through you."

Aang's voice was bitter with resentment. "I remember."

"But what you don't understand is that cosmic energy _is_ love," Pathik explained. "It is the purest, greatest encompassing love of all. It is the most powerful, because it goes beyond the illusions of separation, of distinction, of ownership." The guru paused, his dark face gently shadowed. "Do you remember how I described earthly attachments, and how you first answered when I asked you to let go?"

Aang screwed up his face unwillingly. "I... you said something about meditating on what attaches me to this world."

Pathik nodded. "And your answer?"

_What? Why would I let go of Katara? I... I love her._

He did not need to say the words. The measured look on the guru's face already told him that both of them remembered what he'd said, crystal clear. Aang swallowed.

"What was wrong with it?" he asked defensively. "I still think that it's not fair, that it _doesn't make sense_ to let go of love. Why do I always have to sacrifice everything that matters to me?"

The look on Pathik's old features didn't change. "Tell me, Aang. Did you stop loving Katara in the caverns of Ba Sing Se? When you almost reached the Avatar state?"

Aang blinked. "No! No, of course not!"

"Then what did you put aside? What did you let go of to unblock your chakra?"

_The green light of the caverns, the green light that had overseen everything. Katara pressed up, hounded by both the Dai Li and Zuko. Watching it in despair. Knowing that even if they joined forces as normal benders, they had no hope._

"_I'm sorry, Katara," and then feeling the earth, the crystals close around to protect him..._

Aang's eyes snapped open. "I... let go of something else," he said slowly, his mind scrabbling for understanding. It felt like he was glimpsing the edges of something bright, of some truth that would unlock the uncertainty in his chest, and he wanted it so badly it hurt. "I... I don't know... but I..."

The guru was gentle, compassionate. "You trusted her to stand alone, Aang. You let her make her own choices. You let go, briefly, of your feeling of ownership."

The words rung true, but Aang blinked. "Ownership? What are you talking about?"

"When I asked you what attached you to this earth, all you mentioned was young Katara. Does that mean you do not care for your other friends? Or your animal companions? Do you not feel an attachment to the trees, the sky, the mountains?"

The glimmer of comprehension grew painfully brighter. "Of course not, it's just..."

"Balance is about proportion, young Avatar. It is about weighting, about choice. But most of all, it is about not allowing one thing to grow so much that it obliterates everything else entirely."

"But I don't..."

This time, Pathik didn't even have to say anything. The Guru just _looked_, and all of a sudden everything stopped. The faltering words died on his lips. His mind opened up. And clearly, so clearly through the lens of his memory, he heard Toph speaking.

"_The only person that meant something, huh?" Toph cocked her head, her voice no longer neutral. "Gee, Aang. Nothing's ever fair."_

Aang's head fell forwards into his hands. "Aargh," he groaned miserably. "I am such an idiot!"

The Guru laughed lightly, and the sweet, living sound brightened the dark atmosphere. "Oh Avatar," he said, his eyes dancing. "You are no idiot. Or at least, no more than the next young boy. Mistakes are but steps of learning."

The words didn't comfort him. Aang stared at Pathik helplessly, the truth of it all hammering him in his chest. "Are you saying my love for Katara is bad?"

Instantly, Pathik sobered again. "No love is bad if nurtured well," he said sternly. "Love is the most powerful energy in the universe. But just like bending the elements can manifest in destruction, love's energy must be used conscientiously and grown wisely. It must be _balanced_."

Aang screwed up his nose. "How can you balance love? Isn't it just... there? A-and for that matter, why would you try to limit love? That makes no sense!"

He could hear his own frustration ringing in his voice, and it hurt. Across from him, Pathik sighed, and for a moment, the enlightened calmness that was on his face slipped to reveal a sadness that Aang couldn't comprehend. When he next spoke, his voice was soft.

"You are right, in some regards. Love cannot be limited. But its shape can be changed, like any other energy."

He paused, but somehow Aang knew he wasn't finished. And he was right. The guru took a breath and kept on speaking.

"All balance requires is for love's choices to be made in trust, in respect, in freedom. When love is instead twisted to jealousy, to fear, to a sense of ownership or expectation... when the feeling of love becomes about just the one person instead of the two, or in cases of families and friends, about the one person instead of the others, then the scales of love will be unbalanced. When love is changed to ideals, to demanded standards, to an image on a pedestal and not the person, then the pure energy of love will sicken. When the love changes so much that it overshadows every other joy in your life, then your internal balance will be broken. Then the love will become a negative earthly attachment and block you from experiencing the whole of the true cosmic energy."

Aang nodded, slowly. The words seemed to be filtering into his mind, echoes of things that he knew but did not want to face. But each one rang with such unbearable truth and relevance that he couldn't stop listening. Somewhere inside, he recognised the fact that he was aching, dully. What the guru was saying was gentle, but at the same time it was cutting into his memories and leaving him with an unpleasant taste in his mouth.

_I knew you wouldn't understand._

_I said I was confused!_

_I __**did**__ think of something. I'm just sorry that it wasn't _good_ enough for you._

Aang screwed his eyes shut. No. _No_. It hadn't happened that way, he hadn't _meant_ it that way...

Pathik saw the pain in Aang's face, and his voice gentled even further. "Perhaps you need time to think about this, young Avatar. If you want, we can talk again tomorrow over some banana and onion juice?"

Aang nodded again, dazedly this time, and Pathik chuckled sadly. The sound rung a distant bell in Aang's mind. "Do not despair, Avatar. It is in your nature to love. It is in your very self. So love, Aang. But love wisely."

His voice came out small. "How?"

Pathik smiled, the curve laden with years and knowledge and truth. "That, you will have to discover for yourself, Avatar. I can but guide you. And it is no secret that it is a hard road. Others have spent lifetimes pondering truths and lessons such as these. As is your fate, though, you have had to learn lessons in a fraction of the time that others have had..."

An old sense of despair, of helplessness settled in Aang's heart. He felt finished. Drained. But then his ears picked up the sound where his mind could not.

"... but so far, you have mostly learnt them well. I have faith in you."

Somehow, it was enough to cut into the fog in Aang's chest and lift it. He shook himself free, a sudden, overwhelming surge of gratitude overcoming him. He'd been worried, so worried about his reception. He'd been worried about failure. He'd been worried about anger or disappointment. But the Guru was staring back at him, the sadness in his eyes only magnifying the infinite love and wisdom in them, and respect welled up in his chest.

"Thank you, Guru Pathik," he said, sincerity in every tone.

The Guru inclined his head, and his smile stayed on those old lips as the Avatar rose and began making his way down the temple. "Keep an open mind, and an open heart, Aang," he called after him, softly. "Love is a funny thing."

* * *

_**To Uncle Iroh,**_

Zuko stopped there and put the pen down, scowling. In reply. the rest of the blank scroll stared back at him, mockingly. His scowl deepened. What was he thinking? What was he doing?Writing letters had never been his forte.

_You could have at least looked me in the eye when you were ripping out my heart._

The memory ripped through him and Zuko winced. For a moment, his hand hovered indecisively, torn between continuing and balling the paper up into the trash. But then his will reasserted itself, and he took a deep breath.

_I am the Fire Lord. I can write a simple, courteous letter to my Uncle. _

Zuko stared long and hard again at the sheet of paper, glad he'd dispensed with the formalities of a scribe. He didn't want anyone else to witness his silent struggle with words at the moment, especially not a stranger. He bit his lip, dipped his pen back in the ink, and drew it out like a sword from its sheath as he began to write again.

_**Thanks. I got your letter.**_

Immediately, Zuko was tempted to throw the pen down again. "Thanks, I got your letter," he mimicked aloud to himself. "Agni, how asinine."

This time there was no hesitation. Zuko rested his pen back in the ink, balled the paper and threw it into the trash to join the growing pile, and started again.

_**To Uncle Iroh,**_

He paused. Breathed. Surely he couldn't think of anything worse than his previous attempt. A crooked smile crossed his face at that. The thought was vaguely heartening, and so he continued.

_**Thank you for the news. We'll have your quarters set up and ready for you as soon as you step off the air balloon.**_

There. That was better. But Zuko held off the self-congratulatory smirk as he stared down at the rest of the empty page. What to write next?

He pinched the bridge of his nose and tried the truth.

_**It will be good to see you again. Things have been... interesting, around here. **_

Zuko balked just short of writing _I could use use some help._ He still had his pride, after all. But even his pride had some limits. Zuko allowed himself a wry grin as he wrote the next, most appropriate words of the entire damn letter.

_**P.S. Thank you for the calming tea.**_

That done, he was about to sign himself off with a flourish when he paused. Thinking, Zuko scanned his desk, contemplating the mounds of paperwork and the cold teapot on its surface. And then he sighed and swallowed the rest of his pride.

_**P.P.S. Please send more. Much more. **_

_**- Zuko**_**.**

There.

Zuko exhaled a loud sigh of relief and filed the scroll away to be sent to the messenger hawks later. Who would have thought a simple letter would have been so taxing? He shook his head wryly, turned back, and surveyed his desk for the next thing that needed to be done. But just as he was about to reach out and find it, there was a knock on the door.

Zuko pushed his chair back abruptly and turned around, his instincts still screaming against his being caught unawares. With the growing tension in the capital, he guessed it was only reasonable. Still, that didn't mean he had to like it. Eyes narrowed, he readied himself into a loose crouch... just as the door opened to reveal his Officer of Public Relations.

Zuko relaxed. "Ty Lee! There you are," he found himself smiling, his tired eyes completely missing her nervous grin. "You've been hard to find, recently. Busy?" he chuckled lightly to himself. "You know, if I didn't know any better, I would have thought you were avoiding..."

The acrobat made an unintelligible sound, and Zuko paused.

"... me."

Ty Lee swallowed. "Well I _have_ been pretty busy," she said in a rush. "I mean, I'm sure you heard, but I had a meeting with the Minister for Culture, Education and Citizenship about a new public program, and then I had to go down to the docks and talk to the media about the riots and graffiti and..."

Her nervous babbling died off as Zuko frowned. It was finally beginning to enter the haze of his weariness that something was definitely up. The acrobat bounced nervously from foot to foot as he crinkled his forehead. What could have happened between now and the last time they'd met?

Ty Lee chewed her bottom lip nervously, and all of a sudden the memory came flooding back. That exact same action, followed by _"We-ell... it's because General Hang invited me to lunch today. With his family."_ It clicked, and Zuko suddenly couldn't believe he hadn't remembered it earlier.

"Ty Lee, did something happen when you had lunch with Hang?"

The acrobat blushed and looked down at her hands, and Zuko could see the moment she decided to just come out with it. Her mouth quivered and she sighed. "We-ell... hesortofaskedifyouweresingle."

Zuko blinked.

Ty Lee cleared her throat and looked up again. "He sort of asked if you were single," she repeated, a little shamefaced. "I mean, the entire lunch was a bit edgy, but that question was the weirdest."

Zuko blinked again. And then, intelligently, "What?"

Ty Lee opened her mouth to say it again, only to be stopped by the Fire Lord's hand. "Wait, I'm pretty sure I heard you right," he muttered, shaking his head in disbelief. "I just..." he shook his head again. "I thought he'd try to find out what my plans were next, or my weaknesses, or maybe even try to get you into his favour. But why would that old dragon-hawk want to know whether I was single?"

Ty Lee shrugged nervously, but behind her round gray eyes Zuko could imagine the gears working. "Perhaps he's worried?" she suggested. "Perhaps the Ministers want you to, I don't know, settle down, find someone."

Zuko raised his eyebrow. "I'd say that they have a lot more to worry about than my love life," he said sharply. "How about the country? Our economy? The refugee situation? Hang doesn't seem the type to focus on something so trivial. Are you sure he invited you to the lunch just for that?"

Ty Lee cocked her head, remembering. "There were some other things," she admitted hesitantly. "He questioned me about Azula once as well. But I don't know, Zuko. I think it was pretty important, because he seemed all happy after I answered. I mean, at first I thought he was trying to figure out where Mai was, but then after I said she was away he just honed in on the whole singleness thing."

A chill settled into Zuko's stomach. "What exactly did you say?"

Ty Lee swallowed. "Um, I said yes?"

Zuko's eyes burned. "Yes what?"

"Yes, you're single?" At his look, she hastily backpedalled. "Well, it's not like I really came out and said it like that, you know! He was just pressing me about you and Mai, and then I said that you two weren't really together anymore, and he made the conclusion himself."

There was a pause, and then... "I see," Zuko said flatly, even though he really, really didn't. "So he's going to use that against me... how?" A thought crossed his mind and he suddenly wanted to howl with sick laughter like a hyena-lion. "Are they going to try set me up with their daughters? Agni! Were they planning to fit that in before or after the unemployment crisis meeting? Or maybe we could have a break during the negotiations on reopening foreign trade?"

He was so caught up in his mini-tirade now, that he didn't even notice Ty Lee's wince. "And then what? A whirlwind romance, a wedding, and there you have it - the Fire Lord under the thumb of his wife's father?" he chuckled bitterly. "Do they think I'll fall for that? You know, aside from the fact that I'm _not_ interested in anything like that for a long, long, _long_ while?"

Ty Lee let out a low breath, a twinge of melancholy caressing her throat. It was sad how often plans went awry. Somewhere, in the depths of her hopelessly romantic heart, she wished that he and Mai could have sorted things out. But her time with her friend and her knowledge of both of them told her that it was better this way.

The wounds would heal. Eventually. "You know, Zuko, it wouldn't have to be like that. I can't imagine you being under anyone's thumb."

He snorted. "Well, it's not like I exactly plan to be either. I'm just trying to figure out what _they_'re planning... and what they could possibly hope to gain by it."

Ty Lee sighed, well aware of Zuko's current problems. And with her background in Court life, worriedly aware about the implications. "I don't know," she said, trying to help. "Maybe they think marriage could be a good thing. If anything, it'd give the nation an excuse to celebrate together, I don't know, build some solidarity."

Zuko almost snarled. "Are they crazy? With the economy like it is, the people will riot if I spend their money on a Court wedding!"

Ty Lee chewed her lip again. "Then maybe they're hoping the celebrations would make people happy?"

The idea barely had time to live before Zuko shot it down. "No," he said; bluntly, bitingly, self-mocking. "I'm not popular as it is, and a wedding won't change that."

"Then how about stability?" Ty Lee suggested. "I mean, besides Uncle Iroh, you're the last of the pure royal bloodline. If things are as unsettled as it is, maybe they want an heir. Just in case, you know. So that if anything happens to you... not that it would! But you know, if anything did happen, there would be someone to continue."

Zuko's jaw dropped, and then clacked closed. Heirs? _Heirs_? Here he was, elbow deep in old blood, tainted gold and starving people, and they wanted him to...

Zuko swallowed. "Fine then," he rasped hoarsely. "If they're so concerned about the probability of the next assassin taking me, then I'll just name a heir. No need to wait fifteen years for them to become useful."

Ty Lee's eyes widened. "That's uh... pretty revolutionary, Zuko. I'm not sure if people will buy that, especially since you can't name anyone with pure royal blood."

He waved his hand dismissively, not even caring about the words bubbling out of his mouth as long as they didn't involve him doing... something with one of the fluttery, cold daughters of his nobles. "We have cousins. I'll find one that's relatively trustworthy and..." he paused, abruptly. "Why are we even talking about this, anyway? I'm not going to die."

"No, of course not!" the acrobat looked alarmed. "It's just, I guess with the assassins and threats and all... everyone's a little antsy?"

Zuko shook his head. "I'm not going to die," he repeated, more forcefully than he felt. "I've got too much to do."

Ty Lee bit her lip, once more, the last time. "Maybe that's what they're afraid of."

* * *

Sheng:

I have done as you requested, and I consider my debt to you fully repaid.

- Hang.

* * *

Hang:

What you have done is useless without the information. Is she or isn't she?

- Sheng.

* * *

Sheng:

Azula's knife is free. Her acrobat is not.

- Hang

* * *

Hang:

Are you sure?

- Sheng

* * *

Sheng:

Positive.

- Hang

* * *

Hang:

Ah. So he was right. It is true that we may find friends in strange places.

- Sheng.

* * *

Sheng:

I'm counting on it. The... possibilities are growing.

- Hang.

* * *

The ship creaked around them, the timber shifting up and down to the swells of their element outside. The two old women sat on the narrow bunks of their cabin, shoulders hunched as if they were drifting on the waves.

It was now two days into the journey - hours after they had first stared, then moved, and then embraced. Kata had felt tears squeeze out the back of dried ducts, dripping bittersweet saltiness down her throat. Hama hadn't wept, only kept her hand fiercely on the other's shoulder. And then, she'd directed her downstairs, away from the clean sea air, the smell of the ocean and the Fire Nation soldiers and into their small cabin. And for the next few hours, that was their den, their safety, their hideaway as they caught up on the decades of loss.

It was hard going. After the initial elation, the troubles lurking at the back of Kata's mind began to surface. She had always believed in Hama from the beginning. But the years and Kama's insistent voice had worn her down, had made her question her faith. After all, why would her best friend leave her behind? Why, if she'd had the power, would she leave _any_ one of them behind?

The questions boiled at the back of her mind, unsaid, unspoken, but enough to stretch an air of wariness between them. And so now, here they were. Silent. All that could comfortably be said had been said, and now Kata sat wearily back against the wall and wondered who this wizened woman in front of her was. Whether they could still be called friends. Whether they could rebuild what they had had.

A wave rolled against the hull of the ship, and Kata felt it in her back. "Hama?" she asked, almost timidly. "Are you feeling all right?"

The other woman smiled. "Back on the sea. It's good to feel it, isn't it?"

Kata nodded. "Maybe we can go up to the deck," she suggested. "Get some fresh air and _see_ it with our eyes. La..." she closed her own eyes briefly for a moment in remembered ecstasy. "It's so beautiful. I... I never thought I'd see the ocean again."

Something infinitesimally small twitched in Hama's gaze, but Kata didn't notice it. "I never thought I'd be travelling to the North Pole," she replied, examining her crooked, cracked fingernails. "A city full of waterbenders, Kata. Think of all the... the _power_ of the Water Tribes. It will be good to see us in our pride again."

Kata nodded again, this time dreamily. "And the culture, and the stories... do you remember when we used to dream of going there? It sounded so incredible. So alike, and yet different." She paused suddenly, a thought just occurring to her. "Do you think it will be hard to adapt?"

Hama laughed, and Kata warmed with the sound. It was old and scratchy, with all the weight of the horrors they'd seen behind it, but to her mind, at least they could laugh. "Oh Kata, I don't think it will be hard at all. Putting aside the whole North and South, we're all Water Tribe. Plus, we'll have friends there."

Kata cocked her head. "Friends? But we've never..."

"Friends," Hama said firmly. "I met someone in prison, the second time around. We'll have friends."

There was something about the certainty with which she said it, as well as the smile across her face, that made Kata swallow down her next questions. Instead, she followed her instinct of unease and leaned further back against the wall, hugging her arms to her chest. "I can't believe we're really going to the North Pole."

Hama smiled, bowing her neck a little to stare at the interlinked fingers in her lap. "I can't believe you're really here. It's so good to see you."

Kata sat straighter and smiled back, about to reply the same with feeling. And then the connotations of their words, of their togetherness, of the situation itself finally sunk in, and she swallowed.

"You know," she said quietly. "I can't believe you're here. I can't believe _we_'re here." The reality of it was finally sinking in, the fear of dreaming collapsing away. Kata's head fell forwards until she rested it in her palms, her thin, worn fingers cupping her own starvation-sallowed cheeks. She swallowed again, felt the moistness in her mouth. "I can't believe we lived to see the end of the war."

Her eyes were down, her unfocused gaze only taking in her own beaten, tortured body, the body that was slowly but steadily getting stronger, getting healed. And so it was that she did not see her friend's head slowly rise, or the glint she hadn't noticed before deepen in her eyes.

But Kata did hear the words, and when she did, her own chin jerked up sharply in surprise. Just in time to catch Hama baring her teeth.

"Who says that we have?"

* * *

-

-

-

-

* * *

A/N II: Whew, that was quite a controversial ride. But on a more important note, I have a bit of sad news. As you may have noticed recently, this fic has been updating a little more erratically than I would have liked. Unfortunately, that looks set to continue for the next few months, not in the least because I'm about to begin uni again, but also because of an original idea that I feel I must give time to before it's too late.

Rest assured, however, that I am *not* abandoning this fic. I've invested too much time, energy and love into it. So chapters will keep coming, they may just be slower.

So thanks for your patience, and to everyone who has been with me so far and who has taken the time to review. I hope you keep enjoying this story.

-Shadowhawke


	25. The Words Unsaid

**Chapter 25: The Words Unsaid**

A/N I - Okay, first of all I have to say one thing. Thank you. For your time, your patience, and your incredible, amazing reviews. It was my birthday on the 27th, and opening my email for the first time in a few days to see new alerts was one of my best birthday presents ever.

Thanks again to everyone who let me know what they were thinking, and I hope you enjoy this new chapter!

* * *

_Sound by thread,_

_And beats by hour._

_The words unsaid,_

_Have all the power._

_

* * *

  
_

It was barely light. The moon still bobbed peacefully in the sky, the stars twinkling faintly beside it. At the edge of the horizon, a sliver of sun sent streaks of golds and oranges through the clouds. The two celestial orbs hung silently over the city, distant guardians overseeing both the sleeping and the awake.

He had been here before - many times before. But today was different. Zuko flexed his toes, standing barefoot on the stone of the training ground. Seven days. One week. It had been one week since he'd been crowned, and he couldn't believe how far he felt he'd fallen.

Zuko stepped forwards with purpose, with pride, and delivered a kick that sent flames scorching the air over twenty meters away before it dissipated. He spun and kicked again, letting the momentum of his turn trigger the roar of fire once more. Hard, fast, he kicked, landed, and kicked again, finishing on the other side of the yard.

He would remember that day for the rest of his life. The cheering. The cries. The feeling of oneness as _his_ nation and _his_ people and the representatives of his world rolled towards him like a wave with their chants. He would remember the words that had come from his stomach - his centre of power - through his heart and finally through his throat to reach the air in front of him. He would forever remember the magical, miraculous feeling of hope and redemption that had seized him and refused to let go.

But he would also remember Azula's bier, the assassin behind him and the difficult confrontation with Sheng afterwards. Zuko's breath steamed in the cool air as he turned and began the same series of kicks in the opposite direction - forceful, powerful, strong. It had been one week since that day... and so much had changed.

He tried to keep his mind clear. Tried to push everything away, like he'd done so often in his quiet times, in his too few times of meditation and peace. But today, the shadows wouldn't budge. They just lurked around in his mind, following him, costing him an ounce of precision here, an inch of strength there. Zuko scowled darkly, twisted, began combining his punches and kicks, and spewed forth frustrated fire into the air.

It was going to be a big day. The straggling drips and drabs of refugees had increased, until the capitol was opening her gates to almost a hundred new people a day. And while he agreed with Hui's idea of the barracks, others didn't. The Ministers had called for an emergency meeting today, likely egged on by their noble lackeys who were worried about congestion and housing and the spoiling of pretty scenery. Zuko scowled again and unleashed a wave of flame that roared out of his throat from the very tips of his toes.

And it wasn't just that, either. The soldiers he had managed to recall were beginning to drift into the capitol as well, jobless and unhappy. He couldn't blame them. After all, it was they who had been fed the lies and propaganda of the Fire Nation most of all - and it was them who had perpetrated many of the atrocities. The pressure of situations like that was enough to drive many men to drink, or even madness. As it was, the combination of pigheaded, armed and trained nationalist soldiers with unruly nobles who still had the epithet of 'the traitor prince' burned into their lips and Ministers who didn't tell him everything and were almost openly subordinate was enough to make Zuko want to scream.

Instead, he sighed, and smoke came out of his nostrils with the exhalation. He was panting lightly now, sweat beginning to glisten in the dawning light. He span, twisted, ducked and leapt across the training ground, swirls of fire trailing beautifully in his wake.

Zuko was no idiot. He knew that there were, there could be solutions to his problems. He remembered his travels too well - from the moment he'd set foot in the little Earth Kingdom town so many months ago, he'd realised that soldiers left to their own devices could get nasty. The solution had called to him even then - either put them to war, or retrain them for honest work. And he wanted to, he did. But money only stretched so far and so thin - he'd received word from Uncle Iroh that the nobles in Ba Sing Se wanted reparations. Many, reparations. And while he hadn't heard from Chief Arnook since he'd sent Sokka off, he had a sinking feeling that the tribes there would want reparations only in lieu of blood. Not to mention the towns and villages in the Earth Kingdom where his people had settled...

That alone was enough to give him a headache. After all, it wasn't as if they didn't have money. Oh no. They had controlled a number of resources throughout the war, the only problem was that those resources were now in the form of marching soldiers, their metal armour, their spewing factories and their hulking battleships.

Zuko gritted his teeth, and delivered a spin kick and twist combo powerful enough to level a small building. If things had been different, he would have immediately sent for the soldiers to be retrained as farmers and the armour to be melted down to ploughs and scythes to get their agriculture up again. As it was, though, such an operation could only be limited. The most fertile ground in all of the Fire Nation lay in the heart of the Weiji province. And of course, what he suspected might be the largest rebel army in the history of his people seemed to have chosen that as his base.

Zuko abruptly cut his katas off and stopped to clench his fists. He was not going to send out his people to die, not until he was certain of what was going on. His heart clenched at the thought, and at the implications. Even though his world was currently revolving around surviving the Ministerial meetings every two days, ploughing through the paperwork of proposals, confirmations, declarations and diplomacy, and trying to connect to his country again, in the end he always found his thoughts drawn back to the army and what it meant. The image of the red statuettes on the floor of his office seemed burned into his brain. And now that he knew Katara and Mai were out there as well...

_You're a terrible person, you know that? Always following us, hunting the Avatar, trying to capture the world's last hope for peace!_

_... aren't you cold?_

_But what do you care? You're the Fire Lord's son!_

_... I just asked if you were cold. I didn't ask for your whole life story._

_Spreading war and violence and hatred is in your blood!_

_... stop worrying._

_You and I both know you've struggled with doing the right thing in the past._

_... I don't hate you._

_Because I'll make sure your destiny ends, right then and there. Permanently._

_... Zuko, what is wrong with you?!_

_I was the first person to trust you. And you turned around and betrayed me._

_... it's over, Zuko. We're done._

_But I am ready to forgive you..._

_Why would I turn against everything I know? Perhaps because I _care.

_I think I'm the one who should be thanking you..._

_But what I do know is that you're the Fire Lord, and I'm a warrior of the Fire Nation._

_You know, I meant what I said last night.... when I told you that you'd make a good Fire Lord..._

_We agree that we don't want to do this. You help save the world, and I... I try to find a place in it._

_Yes. We have a future..._

_I will follow you._

Zuko sighed, dropped to the ground, and began stretching. His muscles shifted easily with him, his movements smooth and silky as he tried to contain his own thoughts once more. It was becoming more difficult with each passing day. He exhaled again and slid his wrists past his toes. He'd known it would be difficult, had known things would be hard, but _Agni_...

Zuko closed his eyes._ Three days ago, I promised my uncle that I would restore the honour of the Fire Nation. And in front of you now, I promise you that I will fight and struggle until the last drop of my blood..._

_Yes. We have a future..._

_I promise..._

"My Lord?"

Zuko's eyes snapped open, wide and alert. Before him, one of his guards was uneasily shifting from foot to foot, as if unsure of what he was doing. Zuko raised his eyebrow.

"What is it?" he asked curtly, standing up.

"It's the waterbender, my Lord," the guard said, and for a moment Zuko's world reeled with the impossibility and the hope. "She's been watching you for a while now, and just then she asked me if she could talk to you."

Zuko blinked. That didn't sound right. He turned to the edge of the training ground and sighed when his thoughts were confirmed.

"Very well, Ping," he said aloud. "Thank you for letting me know."

Zuko didn't see the guard smile and bow in astonishment that his Lord had remembered his name. Instead, he walked purposefully towards the edge of the yard and the old waterbender waiting for him, flanked on either side by another two guards.

Oddly enough, she seemed more uncertain than fearful when he approached. The sight was enough to bring an unconscious, weary curve to the Fire Lord's lips. After all she'd been through, he would have thought she'd still be petrified and hate-filled, like her sister. He'd never have thought she'd just be uncomfortable, let alone strong enough to actually seek him out.

_Ah yes, strength. It wasn't that long ago you thought that all waterbenders were weak, was it? Katara certainly showed you..._

"Lady Kama," he nodded his head respectfully. "What brings you here? I hope everything is well?"

Again, Zuko didn't notice the pleasant surprise of someone who didn't expect their name to be remembered, let alone spoken preceded by an honorific. "Oh, um, I was just thinking. It's been two days since.... since my sister left, and the room you've given us is awfully big for one old woman. Perhaps I could move to a single room instead? If that's all right?"

Zuko gave her a blank look. Normally, he knew that guests brought their matters to the Palace Steward. Then again, she was under his protection, and perhaps she didn't know who else to turn to...

She misread his look. "Oh, I see. That's probably too much trouble. Well, I just thought it might free up some space for you, but..."

Zuko blinked. "What? No!"

She gave him a quizzical look, and even as he hastened to explain, he couldn't believe how different this was from the few days prior when her sister had been standing in her place. "I mean, of course it's no trouble. I apologise, I should have thought of it earlier."

He tried to picture the guest wing in his mind for the most appropriate relocation, and as such he missed the amazed look on her face again. _The Fire Lord. Apologising. _"Well... there is a room in the same wing for you, Lady Kama. I'll ask the servants to move your things there today," he smiled, slightly. "From memory, I think it also has its own private fountain."

Surprise again, for his consideration, but again he didn't notice it because the sudden smile on her face was too bright for its smallness. "T-thank you, Fire Lord," she bowed her head.

But Zuko could feel his own surprise. "You're welcome," he said dumbly as she curtsied to him and the guards escorted her away. _She's thanking me. Such a simple thing, and after all she's gone through, _she, _the prisoner of war, is thanking _me_._

He looked after her, long after her familiar blue vanished from his sight. Such a simple problem, such a simple solution, and such a simple beauty in the gratitude at the end.

Zuko sighed, and thought of his timetable. If only everything else were so easy.

* * *

Aang made his way down the Temple sides much slower than he had made his way up, his grey eyes still slightly glazed and unseeing. The world seemed different from how he'd left it, in a subtle way that he couldn't quite place. The trees that sprawled overgrown over the temple ruins looked greener, the stones at his feet no longer as hard and grey. The very air that he loved seemed to buzz with life, and in the glowing sunset that now adorned the horizon, everything was stained with rose-coloured hues and the serenity of the twilight mountains. Combined with the thoughts whirling in his head, it was almost overwhelming.

And so it was almost by instinct that Aang squeezed his eyes shut and began stepping by feet alone, blocking out the visuals from intruding into his already confused mind and trusting the vibrations in the earth that had saved his life on the day of the comet. It took a few moments to adjust, to be true - that special, silent place in him that was drawn towards the earth instead of the air he rode. But when he did, the surety of it rippled through his bones and muscles, positioning him on the dirt and rock so that he neither slipped nor faltered all the way down, even when pebbles skittered out from under his footing.

When he reached the bottom, back where he'd left Appa, Momo and Toph, he paused for a moment and opened his eyes. The old courtyard stretched out empty and worn before him, and somehow he wasn't surprised. Judging by the sun, he'd been up on the temple top with the Guru for longer than it had felt.

Comfortably, reassuringly, Aang closed his eyes again and listened to the earth again. This time, it wasn't long before his other senses picked up the heavy vibrations of his animal companion. He raised his eyebrow a little when he felt nothing else, or rather, no other human vibrations to accompany it. After all, that could only mean one thing.

He began walking towards the sound, patiently tracking it with his feet and letting the simplicity of the task gently push the rest of his conflict into the back of his mind. And it wasn't long before he caught sight of his beloved animal companion walking amongst the overgrown orchards of the temple, Toph reclining on his back and Momo perched on his head.

"Hey guys, I'm back," Aang spun a small whirl of wind to carry him up to the saddle, and then cocked his head to the side as he realised something. "Uh, Toph? How come you're still on Appa? I thought you would be, I don't know, getting back in touch with your earth again."

"Well, once you're used to him, the old furball's comfortable" she said casually, as if she'd been expecting both him and the question. "How'd the talk go?"

That was enough to bring everything rushing back, and Aang wasn't sure whether to scowl or thank her. He didn't want to deal with all of it now. He just wanted to rest, like the Guru had said...

_No, the Guru told you to think it over. That means you face it head-on with the time you have._

... and yet he also knew that it had to be done. With a deep sigh, Aang dropped to his seat on Appa's saddle.

"Better than the first time, I guess," he said truthfully. "I mean, last time felt so rushed. I just got here, and he told me about the chakras, and then we started opening them. It was so intense. But this time, it was just sitting down and talking."

_Which was possibly just as intense, but hey..._

"That so?" Toph raised her eyebrow. "Then how come you sound like you've been put through a fight with a hog monkey and come out the wrong end?"

Aang winced. "I guess we talked about some stuff I'd rather not have."

She nodded. "But did it help?"

This time, he squirmed. _Help? Yeah, I guess. But it also opened up a can of spider-worms I really don't want to deal with. _"I guess? I don't know, he told me to think about it tonight and come back tomorrow."

Perhaps it was his words, perhaps it was something in his voice, or perhaps it was just her - just her uncanny senses and her limitless perception. But Toph suddenly sat up with a frown, her casual manner melting away from her like a falling cloak. The change made him look at her, properly. In the dimming sunset, the dying light caught the jade of her sightless eyes and held up a rose against her cheek. "Aang?" she asked, her voice suddenly serious. "What's wrong?"

He squirmed again. "N-nothing, it's just I need to think over what the Guru said and..."

"Don't lie to me, Twinkletoes." The flatness of her voice cut through the dying syllables on his lips. "There's more to this 'still having stuff to learn' thing than you've told either me or Iroh, isn't there?"

The air whooshed from his lungs. "Yeah."

She hmmphed, and suddenly seemed a little more at ease again. "I thought so," she muttered, leaning back again. A strand of hair dropped from behind her ears and dangled down her neck, and she flicked it away. "So, what is it?"

Aang blinked. _Nothing. No-one. Everything. Everyone. _He thought about saying that it was complicated and just leaving it at that, but one look at Toph's resolute face and he knew that that just wouldn't cut it. And in the twilight serenity of the Eastern Air Temple, with just him and her, Momo and Appa, he suddenly found that he didn't mind. That he could say something without having Sokka make a joke out of it, Zuko angsting, or even Katara telling him that everything would be all right.

Because he didn't want to hear that everything would be all right. Not now. He just wanted to figure it out. To know the truth. And in his heart, he knew that the blind girl in front of him was the perfect one to aid him in that.

Taking a deep breath, he started. "The Guru said that I needed to find balance in myself," he said quietly. "And I think he's right. After I got control of the Avatar State, I've been feeling strange. Sometimes, I feel like I'm the fully realised Avatar; powerful, calm, in control. And then at other times I'm so unsure. I don't think I can do everything I'm supposed to. Sometimes I'm..."

The other words had come out in a rush, almost like a stream of consciousness as thoughts that had broiled deep inside him for too long came bubbling out. But now... now he paused. His mouth opened and tried to shape a sound, a syllable, but there was a great pain in his throat blocking it.

He tried desperately to get past it. If there was anyone in the world he didn't want to show weakness to, it was Toph, because there was something about her that cut past all of that, that made him feel like he was stronger. And not only that, he was afraid she'd jump in and say something comforting, say that he shouldn't worry and that he could do it. He was afraid that she'd brush it off, treat him as the invincible Avatar that he didn't always feel like, and in that way, leave him alone.

But she didn't. Against the reddening sky, her sightless eyes were calm as she waited for him to continue, and there was such a solidity and reassurance in her form that Aang suddenly felt calmer himself. This was Toph. She had never expected anything of him - never put some great hope or the world itself on his shoulders. She had just always been there. Teaching, guiding, playing, advising. It struck him that even though she could sometimes be the wild child that Katara accused her of, she was also one of the wisest people he knew.

He settled, took a deep breath of his element, and this time felt the words come. "Sometimes I'm just so afraid," he whispered, hating himself. He saw a glint in her eye, knew that she was about to reassert her badass position on fear, and hastened to continue spilling the words that had never left his mouth before. "Not so much of what is to come, but of failing to meet what is to come. Because then, if I do..."

He took another gulp of breath, felt headiness flood his system, and then let the words rush out of his mouth like an anguished prayer. "I'll fail everyone and they'll leave me."

There was a pause, a moment of blessed stillness. Around them, the mountains were quiet and alive, the sunset glowing like rime against their edges. Aang felt the wind press against his cheek, his scalp, and couldn't believe what he'd said. There it was. One of the darkest secrets that had tormented him for what seemed like years, and he'd just let it out. He wasn't sure what to think about that. He'd been bottling it up for so long; he'd pushed it to the back of his mind before his fight with Ozai, because he knew that if he failed there, he wouldn't be around to be alone. But now things were different. Now there were a million little battles he had to fight each day, and each one seemed to hinge with a toxic weight that might or might not be important in the future. And it scared him that he might make the wrong move one day, make the wrong decision, and have everyone leave him.

Because then he'd be alone.

Forever alone.

Somewhere deep, deep inside him, a thought stirred and connected with what the Guru had mentioned. _That's why you cling. That's why you won't let go. That's why you try to possess, because what's yours can't leave you._

And, even deeper, _and while you place happiness in such a one-sided bond, you will never be happy._

"This is to do with Katara, isn't it?"

Aang blinked, and promptly shoved away the uncomfortable thought to the back of his mind, forgotten. In the stillness, the sunset had gone, and now darkness swallowed Toph's features in a gentle embrace. He turned to her and tried to process what she'd said.

"Yes," he blurted out, and then, "No. Maybe. I mean, it seemed so clear before, but now it's so confusing." _Now I can understand why she was confused. _He shook his head and dropped it into the comforting cradle of his palms. Suddenly, he felt so inexplicably, inextricably drained. "I just don't want the future to be so unsteady. I don't want to be afraid every time I make a decision that I'll fail and ruin everything. I don't want to disappoint anyone and have them leave..."

Aang shut his eyes at the memory. At the _memories_. Because there were so many of them - the first when everything had been too much and he'd run away only to wake up and find his race dead and gone because of him. And then again, when he'd realised the extent of the war that had raged on in his absence and the old fisherman who had called him on it. And then once more, when the City of Ba Sing Se fell while he was there. While he was right _there_. Aang had never felt so terrible, so powerless. All the other times, the failures had occurred because of his absence. But this time, he'd been **there**. _I'm the Avatar, I'm supposed to stop those things. I failed. I have to regain my honour. _And although his friends had followed him that time, what if he did something else that couldn't be forgiven? What if he already had? He remembered the balcony on Ember Island; the coldness, aloofness, unpreparedness. _I'm going inside. _And he squeezed his eyes shut even more at his own stupidity...

Only to open them again in the next moment when he felt something brush against him. Aang gaped as Toph snickered and settled herself down by his side, the accompanying punch to his arm almost gentle. "Hey, you," she said softly. "I'm not going anywhere."

He blinked, and she grinned at him with all the bravado her small lungs could muster. "Seriously. Even if you do something cataclysmic-ally stupid, I'm not going anywhere. Because if you manage to screw up so badly while I'm _around_, how much worse off would the world be if I wasn't kicking in with some damage control?"

He kept staring, his mind unable to exactly contemplate what she was saying. Everything she was saying was Toph. The bravado, the awesomeness, the pure cheek and strength. He should have expected it, and yet he hadn't. Because even despite the shred of trust that he had in her, the shred which had allowed him to tell her things he couldn't have told anyone else, the rest of him was still dreading the inevitable response; the blithe dismissal, or even scorn. He wouldn't have blamed her, she was always so strong everyone else looked weak next to her. But even worse, he was dreading what might happen instead, what had always happened: the pat on the head, the smile that gave him too much responsibility for his narrow shoulders, and the assurance that everything would be all right because he was the Avatar.

He must have lost track of the seconds, because the next moment she was punching him again, a little harder. "What's wrong? Tiger-cat got your tongue? I just said I'm not going anywhere, Twinkletoes." She smirked, with all the self-assurance that he envied and the truth that he desired. "You _need_ me."

And Aang thought of the Guru, thought of love as an energy that could change and evolve, thought of friends and family and another he could trust to cup his heart in their hands. He thought of the earth, of the air, of the fire and water in and around him - both their beauty and their ugliness, their dance and their destruction. And of course, he thought of Katara. Of blue folds of cloth, of grace and beauty and kindness, of the promise to take care of him wherever he went, whatever he did. And before he could stop it, the same old feelings began welling up - the possessiveness, the ownership, the desperation. Aang frowned as he tried to push them away, as he tried to get to the pure font of love underneath it all, the cosmic energy Pathik had spoken about. He grabbed the feeling of it and turned it back, ran it alongside the tracks of his memory to look for the point that it had begun to go wrong...

And arrived at the moment where he opened his eyes after a century-long sleep.

Unbidden, Aang's frown deepened. A voice welled up inside him, one that he recognised as his own.

_From the very beginning... I loved her._

Oddly, the thought didn't bring him the comfort it should have. Aang squirmed in his seat, trying to think, trying to reason. And that was when he remembered the other girl next to him, the one whose eyelids were drooping shut even as she gazed at him sightlessly for an answer.

What had she said? He couldn't remember. But he shook himself from the blackness of his mood and laid a friendly hand on her shoulder.

"Thanks Toph," he said with a fake, cheery grin, hoping that it was appropriate. "But you know what? I think we should get some sleep now. We're both tired and all."

He watched as she tilted her neck quizzically, and then shrugged. "Sure, sure," she said, her voice oddly flat. "Well, goodnight then."

Turning away from him, she snuggled down into the crook of her arm. He smiled quietly at the sight, and then lay down too on the bison saddle beneath the stars. In the position he was in, curled against the sides, he could see her small form across from him, solid and real. And the familiar sight of it reminded him of everything - the memories, the contrasts, the struggle.

_I'm going inside. _How much had that moment haunted him? How much had he regretted it? _I'm going inside. I'm going inside. I'm going..._

_I'm not going anywhere, Twinkletoes. You __**need**__ me._

The power of the newly awakened memory hit him, and it took away his own breath as he stared. She was small, yes. But he knew that form - knew that it moved with her own deadly grace and loyalty and strength. _Love is energy. It can be shaped. Lover. Friend. Family. _

From her light breaths, he wasn't sure if she was sleeping or not. But the words came to his mouth anyway, and demanded to be said.

_I'm not going anywhere, Twinkletoes. You __**need**__ me._

"Yeah," he agreed. "I do."

* * *

"_Sokka. There's something you're not telling me..."_

On the first day, against the clear blue of the sky and the receding Fire Nation shore behind them, Sokka told her about the city. He spoke of the majestic ice domes, the sun glinting white off the snow, the canals built for dignity, formality, and sensuously swaying boats. But he did not mention specifics, and he did not mention people, and he did not mention that the canals seemed also _built_ for lovers.

It was too soon for that.

On the second day, after they had picked up Hama and Sokka had recovered from their staring match, he told her about the culture. He told her how Katara had faced up to everyone with so much righteous indignation, how she'd held her own for a few minutes, untrained, against the greatest Waterbending Master of the North Pole. How even that wasn't enough to grant her a place, but then when Pakku realised how much his own chauvinism had injured himself, he had relented.

He did not need to mention what Suki should expect. He saw the warrior's intelligence in her eyes, the flicker of her lashes as he spoke that told him she was assimilating, assessing, planning. He saw the curve of her dangerous lips, saw it widen in approval at his story of Katara's fight, and knew that the North Pole wouldn't know what hit it.

He was counting on that, because his own warrior's mind was moving too.

On the third day, after their morning practice and early lunch, he settled down in the sun on the deck and told her about his explorations of the city during Aang and Katara's days of training. He told her about how he got to know the city, as intimately as one can in two frenzied weeks before the storm. He told her of the great buildings shielding cosy lodges, of the Healers' hospices dotting the corners at strategically placed locations, of the bars and taverns beneath and above the ice where warriors and hunters retired after a long day's work before they went home. And he told her how, when night fell, the great canals became a poor friend to the small and winding alleyways connecting bar to bar, between house to house - the paths that smiled upon the shadowed and those with darker business.

She nodded in silent appreciation at his scouting. He felt a small surge of real pride seep around his heart and hold him warm. The woman in front of him knew what he was talking about. She knew the benefits of knowing her environment, of learning it so intimately you could use it as a weapon or defence.

After all, she'd been the one to teach him.

On the fourth day, as the battleship charged through colder waters at a remarkable rate, he told her more against the spray of the ocean and the lick of the wind. Both sent her short brown strands flying past her ears, clearing her face and smile to his perception. He told himself that she seemed less beautiful, more pretty under the harsh sea light because he was distracted, even while he took the next faltering step and told her about the political system. How the Chieftain, Arnook, was treated rank-wise as a King, how he had his own Council of Advisers (all old men, of course), and the way the warriors were organised underneath that in a strict hierarchical structure he'd never seen in the South. It was a short conversation, because he didn't feel like talking too much. When he stopped, he saw the look in her eyes expecting more, and he turned away from it with a quick explanation which was a lie.

Because his over-full stomach had nothing to do with his tiredness. His exhaustion came from the burden of the memory of a white-haired princess who looked down on him at night.

On the fifth day, the day he had prepared himself mentally to tell her, they hit a storm at sea. And there was no time or place to talk, because the world was the lash of the wind and the sailors' cries and the driving rain and swell. And even though they were in no real danger, on Zuko's monstrous battleship, Sokka watched Suki climb, leap, and twist through the ropes with breathtaking grace, doing her own bit in the battle against the elements.

She had never looked so magnificent, hair plastered to her face and water dripping from her smile. But Sokka knew that the water was getting even colder around them, and the frost of that knowledge somehow clouded his vision.

And then, finally, on the sixth day, he told her.

It was hard, and yet easy. The words halted in the roof of his mouth, and then spilled out with surprising speed. He told her about the feast and how he'd first seen her as she was presented as the Chieftain's daughter, how the moonlight had touched her hair and made her seem all the more ethereally beautiful. He told her about his clumsy attempts to talk to her, leaving bites of self-inflicted mockery trailing on his words. He told her about their meetings, about how they were always circling around each other in their thoughts and their world - never touching but almost touching like the koi fish in the pond, until that fateful day where she kissed him and told him she was engaged to another.

He stopped at that. He was feeling cold inside, a little empty and metallic, and his blue eyes searched hers to see how she was taking it. Surprisingly, there was nothing there. No hint of weakness, no nothing. For someone who had such an expressive face, Suki was still and unreadable, and Sokka felt a shiver of worry run through him as she merely nodded at him to go on.

Suddenly he was worried whether the brutal honesty approach was too much. And yet, as he looked into her unwavering eyes, he knew that it was what she deserved, and so he kept on going. Past his sign-up to a suicide mission, past his reappointment, and all the way up to the part where she died in his arms and then vanished into the sky.

And then he stopped.

Part of him wanted to say more, wanted to explain that after things had changed. But he stayed silent, because he knew she needed to think. There was an oddly calculating look in her eyes, as if she was weighing up everything he was telling her and trying to balance it against the scales of his heart - trying to slot it in to her position in the world and make sense of it all. But soon that look faded, and when it did, he opened his mouth to say something first. To pre-empt her questions, her concern, her insecurity. Because he could see it now in her eyes, as her anxiety cracked away at the mask around her face. And his heart quickened, because he knew that they were cracks that spoke of the death of their relationship and the trust and respect that had blossomed between them.

But luckily, he also knew exactly what to say to quell the fears. Sokka leaned back against his chair on the deck and sighed. It was stupid, he knew. She and him had never had a vocal agreement, an outright sound to seal what they both knew was there. Perhaps it would have been different if he'd never met Yue at the North Pole. But he had, and since then he had guarded his heart and the wounds on it all the more closely, and while he held the three words close to his chest, he knew that she also would not say it for the fear of it being unreturned.

But he could tell her now.

Now was the right time.

He knew it was.

And so Sokka gazed into Suki's cracking eyes, reached out a hand to clasp her fingers, readied himself to say "I love you..."

And then _they_ came.

* * *

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A/N II: Phew... now that that's over, sorry I made you guys wait for so long this time. I know I won't be writing as regularly (weekly) as I used to, but I'm hoping to still get it done at a reasonable pace.

More importantly, though, I wanted to let you know that this arc of the story is winding to an end. This is a decision I've made recently just because the idea for this story feels too big to contain in just one long unbroken thing. But I promise that I will be continuing, and soon! I've invested far too much into this behemoth to not finish it. :)

So I hope that you enjoy the rest of this arc, and that you'll join me for the next!


	26. Storm Clouds

**Chapter 26: Storm Clouds**

**

* * *

**_With every step,_

_And every day,_

_A storm is brewing,_

_To cloud the way._

_

* * *

_

It was a small boat, but perhaps that was because anything compared to the Fire Nation battleship was small. Sokka peered over the metal edge and watched as they drew up beside them and the men manning the oars prepared to ascend.

Before he could take a closer look, a sudden splash of icy water hit him in the face. Sokka staggered back as three of the men waterbended themselves upwards. The last two waterbended together, one holding onto the other and bending them both upwards onto the ship. By the time Sokka had stopped spluttering and wiping the blurriness from his eyes, all of them had boarded.

One of the men stepped forwards. "Sokka of the Southern Water Tribes?"

"That's me," he rubbed his eyes one more time and stepped forwards as well. Only where the other Water Tribe warrior's face was cold, his was smiling. "You guys must be Arnook's greeting party. I didn't think we were so close yet!"

The man shifted. "We're not," he admitted simply. His voice was deep and gravelly, and Sokka basked in the familiar tones caved by ice and arctic winds. And then his awareness cleared that little bit more, and he realised that four of the newcomers were heavily armed, and the tension between them and the Fire Nation crew at his back was so palpable he could jab it with a spear.

Wait. Only four...?

Sokka's eyes widened. Five people had come on the small boat, but the last one stood at the back completely unarmed. And that wasn't the only difference. Whoever it was was heavily cloaked, which when taken into account with her weaponless status, was fairly unusual. Not to mention they were significantly smaller than the bulky warriors. Smaller and slimmer and suspiciously like...

The cloaked figure lifted her head as she felt his scrutiny, and that was when Sokka's world imploded.

"Yue?" he whispered reverently.

Suddenly, the world shrunk down to him and the white haired girl standing in front of him. He ignored the Fire Nation crew's uneasiness at his back, the Water Tribe Warriors' defensiveness at his front, and didn't notice when Suki's face went white behind him. He just walked forwards like a man in a dream, until she was standing right in front of him.

He blinked, and looked. Blinked and looked again. No, his eyes hadn't deceived him. There was definitely a lock of ermine hair lying against the dark blue of her cloak, and he almost reached out to touch it when his mind finally caught up to him.

"Yue?" he asked again, thickly. And then, "No... no it can't be..."

It was as if all the members on deck were frozen. The Fire Nation men kept darting nervous glances at each other, trying to debate whether to go into firebending stance or not. Sokka had explicitly made them remove their helmets the closer they'd gotten to the North Pole, warning them that even if they didn't care about appearances and icicles in their throats, metal conducted cold as well as it conducted heat. As it was, the Water Tribe Warriors were still looking keenly at them, hands ready.

And yet, everyone was also looking as the girl raised her head and smiled sadly.

"No, I'm not Yue."

Sokka felt vindicated, staggered, and devastated all at the same time. It was a crushing mixture of emotions, and the hand that had been half raised to touch divinity dropped again. He wet his lips in the dry wind.

"Then who are you?" he asked hoarsely, suddenly angry. "Why are you... why are you dressed up like her?"

Because she was. Now that he looked closely, her hair was done in exactly the same way, the cloak covering a dress that was nearly identical except for its inferior quality. He wasn't sure what he would have done if she'd given him her reason, but luckily it was the man who spoke from behind him. Even then, Sokka couldn't rip his eyes from her shadow long enough to turn and look at him.

Perhaps it was for the better, because then he would have seen Suki's stricken face.

"Things have changed in the North since you left, Master Sokka," the man said gruffly. "It's become custom for the girls of sixteen to dye their hair white in her memory."

There was a silence as Sokka digested that, as he tried to rationally fight against the waves and pictures assaulting him. It didn't help that the girl was still looking at him, her blue eyes close, and yet so different from the ones which haunted him. He closed his eyes, felt the threat of a dam exploding and flooding his mind with memories, and opened them again.

"Sorry," he managed to choke out. "My mistake."

She seemed baffled, but before she could reply he turned back to face the leader. He steadied himself as he moved, an internal voice reminding him to take it one step at a time, to focus on one thing every moment. If he'd looked in the right direction, he would have also seen the carefully collected blankness that now wove around Suki's features.

"Sorry about that," he repeated, and then let himself physically change from boy to warrior. The waterbender blinked, and Sokka smiled bleakly to himself. And then he spoke. "Now, I'm assuming Chief Arnook didn't send you just to update me on your latest cultural developments."

"That's one way of putting it," the man sighed and fingered his dagger. Across from them, the firebenders shifted. "You're right, Master Sokka. The Chief sent us here to ascertain whether the Fire Lord's missives were... correct."

_And to assess our danger, and possibly to launch a mission to destroy us, _Sokka thought. It wouldn't have been too hard, either. The four male waterbenders in front of him looked pretty impressive, and he doubted they would have had too much trouble stopping, if not overturning the ship. His eyes flickered briefly to the weaponless girl. She was probably there to heal if anything went wrong. Somehow, he wasn't surprised.

"They are," Sokka said out loud. "The war was officially ended last week, remember?"

The man's eyes narrowed. "A battleship?"

Sokka scratched his chin. "I think Z- the Fire Lord thought of it as a gift, actually," he mused. "Don't really know what he was thinking, but I guess you could think of it this way. By giving you this ship, the Fire Nation's handed over the ability to determine the structural weaknesses in its navy. I'd say that's one heck of a peace statement."

The man blinked this time, but then his eyes shifted to the side. Sokka followed his gaze, saw the tenseness of the Firebenders, and finally realised he was standing in what was inches away from a battlefield.

He ignored the temptation to facepalm. "Sorry," he muttered again, this time to no one in particular. And then, "Everyone stand down, all right? The war's over. Nobody's going to fight."

It didn't quite do the trick, but it was enough. At his vocalisation, the firebenders' stiffness dropped a little, and some of the crew even went back to what they were supposed to be doing. By the same token, the waterbenders' loosened their stance. Sokka sighed in relief, and turned back to the leader.

"Convinced?"

The man assessed him for a moment, and then nodded sharply. "You reason well, Master Sokka," he said warily. He pressed his foot lightly down on the metal of the deck, as if it were a wild tiger-shark that might attack at any moment. "It's good to know that the North Pole isn't facing any... immediate threat."

The choice of wording sobered him. Sokka pursed his lips and studied the other man's gaze. "What's been happening in the North Pole?"

The man cast another look to the side. Most of the crew had now dispersed, heading back to their duties. Only Suki stood there now, her stylised clothes clearly non-Fire Nation and her stance clearly non-Firebender. The leader seemed to relax a little further.

"I've heard a little about you, Master Sokka," the man said, almost conspiratorially. "And what I've heard, I've liked. From Water Tribe to Water Tribe, things are a little shaky in the North Pole right now. Heck, I even saw the Fire Lord's written declaration of peace myself, and I didn't believe an inch of it until I got within eyesight of this ship and no fireball came at me."

Sokka felt worry creep inside his bones. "Is that how everyone thinks?"

"Not everyone," the man admitted. "But quite a few. I'm not sure if you remember many of the faces you saw when you came, but a lot of the warriors you fought with, especially the young ones, are calling for blood. They're led by a noble called Hahn, and they've been lobbying Arnook furiously ever since we got the message from the Fire Lord."

Not surprisingly, Sokka's brain went into overdrive at the name. "Hahn?" he asked in disbelief. In fact, his disbelief was so great it bore repeating. "_Hahn_?"

"Yeah," the man looked at him strangely. "He made it all the way back to shore. Survived somehow on some Fire Nation navy debris. Made him a hero in the eyes of a lot of us after the invasion."

Hahn. Lobbyists. Nobles. Arnook. Blood. Sokka felt the beginnings of a headache throb behind his temple. Clearly, the situation was worse than he and Zuko had expected. But even so, Zuko was still counting on him to clean it up.

This was insanity. Sokka took a deep breath and closed his eyes, trying to assess all the possibilities and probabilities. So. Hahn was heading a powerful and influential group of warriors. They were badgering Arnook. They had to stop. He had to stop them. How...?

Suddenly, the throb of his incipient headache was joined by the throb of a new plan. "Has Arnook told anyone that I'm coming?" he asked abruptly. "Besides you, of course."

The waterbender looked startled. "Well... uh... he said that a Water Tribe ambassador from the Fire Nation was coming. It was the only reason you weren't flatly refused or attacked, to be honest."

Sokka hmmed. A setback, but still... "But did he explain _why_ there was a Water Tribe ambassador from the Fire Nation? Or who it was?"

"Well, he told _us_ who to expect," the man was clearly a little flabbergasted now. "I mean, seeing as we were the, ah, greeting party."

_Greeting party indeed, _Sokka thought darkly, but the rest of his mind was already caught up in the formulations of a plan. He wasn't sure how much further he could push now, without sounding suspicious. So instead he smiled, and clapped the warrior hard on the shoulder.

"Well, thanks for catching me up!" he said brightly. "It's good to know what I'm walking into, right? What are you going to do now?"

The man eyed him carefully. "Well, our orders were to return to Arnook with our news, so..."

"Good, good," Sokka slapped him again, just for effect. "And while you're there, could you pass a message on for me?"

The man now looked wary again. Sokka noted idly that it was like they'd gone full circle, but he didn't particularly mind. With a clumsy grace, he pulled the man's ear down next to his mouth, whispered, and then let him go.

The waterbender's eyes changed from startled, to suspicious, to just plain bemused. "Are you sure, Master Sokka?"

"Positive," Sokka said, grinning madly now. "Now, be sure to deliver it for me, won't you? As soon as possible?"

The man blinked. "Uh... yes Master Sokka. At once."

The group of five inclined their heads as one, and then turned to the railings. In one smooth move, the water curled up again and carried them back towards their boat. Even as his plan grew wildly in his head, Sokka couldn't help but gaze after the small cloaked figure, a glint of something indescribable in his eyes.

He was stirred only by the sound of footsteps, walking away. That was one thing he had to get used to on a metal ship. Unless one was very careful, it was impossible to sneak away on clanging metal. Sokka spun around, just in time to see Suki's receding back.

There was one thing to be said about Sokka's mind. sometimes it was unbearably slow. At others, it was unaccountably quick. And now, even as half of his brain whirred on the problem of peace, the other half summed up everything that had happened, everything that he had told her today, and then everything he had just done, and reeled in horror.

In an instant, he was beside her, hand reaching out to catch her arm. She stopped at the contact, but kept her eyes fixed on the far horizon. Inside him, Sokka felt his heart tremble.

"Honey?" Sokka asked softly. "Suki?"

The Kyoshi warrior looked away from him, her eyes hooded. "Not now, Sokka," she told him quietly. "Not now, I need to... think."

Sokka felt an immediate impulse to reach out and touch her cheek, to cradle it against his palm. To enfold her in a fierce hug and feel her skin press against his skin. Physical contact, _any_ physical contact to prove to her as well as to him that it was going to be okay between them, that nothing had changed, that he hadn't broken anything...

_That he hadn't doomed himself to any more self-inflicted pain..._

But he didn't. There was an iciness in his bones that seemed to have bled there the colder the water got around him. An iciness that had invaded his muscles and slowed his mind. An iciness that dulled the voice inside his head screaming at him.

And so he just stood there, carefully released her arm, and watched her walk away.

* * *

Shen Li's mouth was a grim line as he stood, stiff and straight behind the Fire Lord's throne. Inches in front of him, he could see Zuko's impassive features backlit against the flicker of his flame. It was hot where he was standing, but not unbearably so. After all, one got used to the heat of a fire when one was in the Fire Nation.

And if one was in the right place for the right amount of time, one could get used to a different sort of heat as well.

"We cannot continue taking the refugees," the Minister for Rural & Urban Development declared adamantly. His voice rung in the echoing hall. "We simply can't handle it. The Fire Nation Capitol cannot handle it."

"Not to mention the Fire Nation itself," the Minister for Agriculture and Environment added. "The peasants are needed to farm the land. At the time, our city's resource plans did not anticipate the return of some of our soldiers, let alone a steady stream of refugees. And we're heading into mid-Autumn."

There was a collective silence. And then...

"Are you saying we're running out of food, Minister?" Zuko asked.

Shen Li found himself holding his breath, and then expelling it in relief when the man answered. "No," he confessed. "But I am merely worried. It is something to factor in, my Lord."

Shen Li watched their faces. It didn't yield much, of course - these were not men who would work their way up only to lose it all on an expression. But there were some things that you didn't need to hide, that were even expedient to show. There was an air of business around the room, the kind of business where one tried to prophesy exactly what doom would fall, and he noted that Zuko had escaped none of it. Behind his calm, stony mask, Shen Li could see the haggardness in his gaze, and felt it too in his own chest.

He was tired.

He wagered Zuko was tired too. While these old and ageing men read their subject-specific reports, delivered their portfolio-specific orders and spoke in Court, he and Zuko had to take everything into account. Including the possibility of mutiny within the ranks. And it wasn't just that. After all, he'd played a balancing act all of his life in a dangerous environment. He was hardly new to that.

No. Shen Li was periodically haunted by a pale face with slanted eyes, and he was angry at himself. Angry that he'd gone out on such a limb, angry that he'd taken such a risk, and even more angry that he cared. He didn't have the time for this now. There was too much at stake, too much to lose.

Even so, Mai and the connotations of her remained drifting in her mind. They'd both promised to serve Zuko. Together. He wondered she'd been thinking as she made that promise, whether they were similar thoughts to his. He wondered whether her promise had meant the same to her as it had to him. Because questions like _that_ were important, he convinced himself. Far more important than any other, because he didn't have the time for their confusion.

The Fire Nation didn't have the time.

An over-familiar voice pulled him back into the throne room. "It is definitely something we must take into consideration, Fire Lord," General Sheng commented, his strident voice unnaturally subdued. He pushed back his chair and stood, his face turned to Zuko. "And I am worried about more than that. The people are still on edge with our... new situation."

His next sombre words rang out without a hint of politic. "Winter may only fuel the fire."

Shen Li let his eyes rest on his father. He was speaking the shadowy, ambiguous truth, and they all knew it, and suddenly he felt more exhausted than before. He'd lost hours of sleep over paving the path to the secret army, had rested only briefly, and now there was another threat he hadn't considered. Very quickly, in the nature of all threats no matter how insubstantial, his imagination entertained itself into images of larger troubles, of a cataclysm all the more destructive because it had come from the inside, and...

_Don't think like that. These things can be averted. It'll be all right. You'll finish what you started. You will._

"In that case, it becomes even more paramount that the refugees not be allowed to take shelter!" It was the Minister for Agriculture and Environment again. Shen Li narrowed his eyes at him. He was a decent man. As decent as one could be when they were among the most high-ranking nobles in the Fire Nation. But his time at his desk had obviously warped him to the point that he saw numbers instead of faces, and that was a worry. "They must return to their villages and keep the production, otherwise our country will fall to her knees."

A number of Ministers began to stand up to speak at that point, but a single note of flame stopped them. Shen Li felt a strange kind of relief as Zuko finally spoke, his mask impassive beneath his ring of fire.

"What are you suggesting, Minister?" Zuko asked coolly. "That we send the refugees, send o_ur people_, back to razed farms and bandit raids under the threat of death?"

There was a silence, and then someone else spoke. "What choice do we have, Fire Lord?" he asked, and it was resignation, not insubordination in his voice. "We cannot keep paying the inns to keep them. We cannot keep relying on charity and goodwill when the city overflows."

Hui stirred at the head of the table. "The barracks..."

"The barracks is nothing but a short term solution," General Hang spoke, his voice cold and detached. Shen Li noticed with interest that his eyes were fixed firmly on Hui's, and then with even more interest as the rest of the table shifted around them. Hui was respected for his position, and rightly so. For Hang to cut him off so abruptly was insulting at the very least, and Shen Li had thought that in these meetings, he usually reserved that for Zuko alone. "And one we should not be entertaining."

That was it. It amazed Shen Li how easily they could erupt, such dignified old men. But erupt they did, and as he saw the hint of a smile on Hang's face, he wondered whether he'd just orchestrated the whole thing.

"Hang! Do not disrespect the Chief Advisor so..."

"Well in that case, do you have anything else to suggest?"

"Perhaps with a few alterations, Hui speaks with wisdom..."

"Come now, surely the situation isn't that dire..."

"It's only beginning..."

"Why should we care? We have food enough in the palace's private stocks..."

"Are you insane?"

"Enough."

It was the first meeting Shen Li had attended since he returned, and he wondered that they all shut up immediately with the one quiet word and the gout of flame. Zuko hadn't raised his voice once, and yet they quietened with the obedience one would expect in the face of a roar. Shen Li narrowed his eyes. What had changed while he was gone?

From his own special position, surveying both the floor in front of him and the Fire Lord's face, he caught a flicker. And then his questions solidified in his throat and threatened to choke him as Zuko exchanged a meaningful glance with Hui, and the Chief Advisor nodded.

Before his mind could fully appreciate the ramifications, Zuko continued. "Gentlemen, I believe we have exhausted our resources on this today. It is a difficult problem we face, but it has not happened yet and so I don't think we should push ourselves to solve it in the space of a few hours."

He paused, and looked at each of them meaningfully. "I'd like everyone to send me their reports and statistics on this problem. We will meet again tomorrow after further evaluation. Meeting dismissed."

And that was it. The men sat still for a moment, as if they too were surprised at the sudden end, and then they stood one by one and bowed. Shen Li didn't watch them, though, he kept his eyes fixed on Zuko.

Yes, something had changed. Like the exhaustion weighing down behind the Fire Lord's eyelids, and the grimness that set his mouth. Inside, Shen Li felt a small creep of dread as Zuko extinguished the flames, rose, and walked away without looking back.

"My Lord?" he asked, uncertainly.

Zuko paused, halfway down the room. "Oh, sorry," he rubbed his eyes tiredly. "I forgot for a moment."

Shen Li frowned with concern. "Is there anything I can help you with?" he asked. Things had been a little strained between them since he'd returned, and he mostly blamed himself. Himself, and his memory of a pale face with golden eyes. "I know there's much, and..."

Zuko shook his head. "I just need to think for a while," he said, pinching the bridge of his nose. "But if you like, you can carry on with your own investigations. That way when we put our heads together, there'll be more we can mine."

Shen Li felt a strange, warm glow at Zuko's casualness, at his trust. It was more than incredible, when he thought about it. It was damn near miraculous. He'd never dreamed anything like this could happen from growing up in Ozai's court. Ozai had kept his advisors at an arm's length, and his servants even further. At this moment, he felt like neither advisor or servant, and he was amazed at how freeing that was.

"Right," he finally managed to work his mouth. "Take care then."

Zuko smiled briefly, but it was a little flat. He nodded in acknowledgement and stepped outside, the doors swinging behind him. Shen Li was left to collect his own thoughts in the vast throne hall.

Perhaps there was hope. He still remembered the feeling when Zuko had first shown his trust, and this second time was no less amazing. It was with a true, tiny, miniscule smile that he too made his way to the door, ready to head to the library...

Only to pause when he stepped out the door, and ran right into someone he didn't particularly want to see.

"Chief Advisor Hui," he acknowledged coldly, bowing his head to his elder. But as he tried to brush past him and keep going, the old man stopped him.

"A moment of your time, young man," he said quietly, one lined palm held up to the air in front of him. "I believe we have some things to talk about."

Wonderful. _Wonderful_. This was just what he needed. Shen Li felt every thread of warmth drain from him, felt the sudden lightness in his chest shrink. At its loss, he resisted the urge to bang his head against the wall and instead closed his eyes briefly. Truly, what had he expected? To be the Fire Lord's Chief Bodyguard without getting his hands dirty? To walk amongst the men who ruled his country without playing politics?

He just wished he'd had a little more time before it started. Or rather, continued in a much more intense and external fashion. As it was, years of mental preparation and conditioning had readied him, and so he opened his eyes and spoke.

"Of course, Chief Advisor," his bladed voice dulled to diplomacy. "Here? Or perhaps in the gardens? Your quarters, perhaps?"

There was a flicker in the old man's eye, which quickly vanished. "As we walk in this wing will be fine."

Shen Li narrowly resisted the urge to raise his eyebrow. There were ears everywhere, everybody knew that. Unless Hui _wanted_ them to be heard...

He shrugged instead, murmured something that sounded vaguely like acquiescence, and shifted his body so that the old man could walk. Hui inclined his head graciously, and Shen Li fell into step at his shoulder. Ahead of them, the Palace wing seemed to stretch out indeterminably, all edges and corners blurred by the distance.

Hui did not speak again for a while. They reached the end of the passage and turned, gradually getting into more populated places. Ahead of them, a servant scurried here, a maid polished there, but Hui walked past them as if they didn't exist. Shen Li was wondering whether this was all an exercise in patience or an excruciating mind game when the silence between them was finally broken.

"It's been beautiful weather, hasn't it?"

If his jaw wasn't so firmly attached to his head, it might possibly have bounced away. Shen Li stared at Hui as if the old man had finally lost it, even as he knew with a grim certainty that Hui would _never_ lose it. There was no end to a mind as sharp as his, and as fascinating as that was, Shen Li wouldn't have willingly glanced into the man's labyrinthine depths if someone had paid him to. He swallowed, mind backed up against the metaphorical corner at the unexpected swing.

"It's been cloudy, Chief Advisor."

Hui shrugged, his long robes shrugging and falling with him. "All the more glorious when Agni's light peeks through. That's something you young ones don't understand sometimes. It takes knowing the darkness to understand how bright the sun is."

Shen Li resisted the urge to twitch. It was even more difficult than resisting the urge to raise his eyebrow. His impeccable, blank-faced Court upbringing was beginning to strain under his own tiredness and mental stress, and the extra pressure wasn't helping. He settled for voicing a non-committal grunt.

Hui continued on, oblivious. "Yes, it's been fine weather indeed. Tell me, young man. When was the last time you took a day off? Just to enjoy the beauty of our country?"

Shen Li began to feel very, very wary. "I had a brief vacation only two days ago, Chief Advisor."

"Good, good." Hui smiled. "After all, one cannot work all the time. It muddies the head, distorts the situation, slows the mind." A rueful look crossed his benign face, lightening the lines and brightening his eyes. "I only wish our own Fire Lord... ah, but I digress. His hard work is a tribute to his devotion."

"That it is," Shen Li echoed strangely, wondering where on earth this was going. He had a terrible feeling, like he was running like a gazelle-cheetah straight into a trap.

A feeling that was validated a moment later, when Hui's eyes flicked from the path ahead of them to him. "But what about you, young man? Do you think your rest managed to clear your head, give you a little perspective?"

They turned yet another corner, and Shen Li realised that at the end of this one stood an entrance into the gardens. The distant irony didn't escape him as he replied, as smoothly and sweetly as the truth. And all the while, at the back of his head, there seemed to sound a whisper that his father would be proud.

He pushed it violently away. "I think all vacations manage to do that," he said, keeping his voice light. "I certainly came back refreshed."

Hui sighed. "If only that were true," he murmured. They took one last step, and entered the cool winds of the gardens. Above them, the sky was cloudy. "As it is, I think it a special occasion when one wakes up to realise that his vision of the world has shifted. That things have changed. Wouldn't you agree?"

If he hadn't felt on edge before, he definitely felt on edge now. In fact, he might as well have been falling over it. Shen Li felt a light sizzle start under his skin, almost a flush. "Indeed."

Hui nodded. "Yes, a special occasion... I'd almost say it was like growing up all over again. Or perhaps it is growing up. One measure of it anyway, that defies mere measurements of years and dates."

The grass bent underneath their shoes. Shen Li felt tiredness, frustration, and hurt throb through him dully.

Hui continued. "Because surely, the moment where you truly realise the extent of your playing field is a better indicator than age, isn't it? I'd wager a thirteen year old who could see all the options in his future and weigh it up properly is more mature than a seventeen year old who persists in maintaining tunnel-vision. Or, another example could be..."

Shen Li felt his patience snap. "Do you have a point, Chief Advisor?" he queried testily. The sweat beading down the back of his neck made him uncomfortable. "Because I must admit, I don't know what you're talking about."

Even as the words came out, he cursed himself for their sound. It was too much like a surrender, an admission for his liking, and the weakness of them opened him up for scrutiny. Shen Li physically _felt_ it as Hui eyed him. Sized him up. Measured him. He felt the increments of himself empty inch by inch into that calculating, hungry gaze, and for a brief moment, his own guilt made the fact that he was being judged unsettle him far more than the person doing the judging.

"I think you know _exactly_ what I'm talking about," the Chief Advisor said at last. And now, there was something subtly different in his tone, something that made Shen Li's pulse quicken and alarm bells ring in his mind. "And what's more, I think you know exactly what I mean."

Shen Li couldn't help it. He felt dry, paper dry, and so he delicately wet his lips. Hui zeroed in on the movement like a wizened predator sensing his kill.

"There are two sides to every struggle, my young friend. And despite what you think, you cannot play them both."

The guard captain jerked back, the silky words breaking the spell. Suddenly, the adrenaline that had been coiling up inside him invaded his bloodstream. "What _I_ think?" he laughed hoarsely. "To the practice says the preacher, Hui. I've chosen _my_ side." Young eyes met old, glittering with defiance. "If there's anyone here who could be trusted of treason, it's..."

Hui's strength, Shen Li decided grudgingly right there and then, was his preternatural calm. It aggravated him. It wasn't right. But Hui was wearing his beatific expression like a monk wore his enlightenment when he spoke again, and for the life of him, Shen Li couldn't understand why he felt so affected by it.

"Careful, young man," the Chief Advisor linked arms under his robes, like a wise guru gently chiding a wayward disciple. "Once you breathe words to the air, you can never get them back."

Something boiled within him and pushed his apprehension of Hui's mystical calm away. Shen Li felt it bubble, felt it rise, and lifted his chin proudly. "How dare you question _my_ honour, then?"

An impasse, an abyss. The gulf widened up between both of them, swallowing space as it went. For the first time in their entire conversation, Hui seemed frozen in shock. It was only a second, but the force of it was such that both of them felt it. Shen Li hid an inner, nasty smirk as the old man blinked, and then the serenity settled upon him once more.

The smirk faded to a cold shield once again, though, when Hui's eyes took on their assessing glint once more. The guard captain stood rigidly tall and proud as those eyes swept over him, and when they returned to his face, he quirked his brow.

Hui paused at the sight. "Well, Chief Bodyguard," he said quietly. "It seems I have underestimated you. I apologise."

Inside, the smirk returned. Shen Li was immediately tempted to let it appear on his face, but he himself was too consummate a player to make such a mistake now. Instead, he nodded shortly, a gracious acceptance given the circumstances.

"Thank you, Chief Advisor," he said formally, tasting every syllable on his tongue like they were honey. "Now, if we are finished I'm afraid I must beg to take my leave. Is there anything else?"

He was readying himself for a departing bow, readying himself to walk away from this whole mess, when Hui spoke.

"Actually, one last thing."

He froze, and then turned the lack of movement into another stiff nod. "Yes?"

Hui smiled. "Give my regards to your mother."

It was as if the world had stopped, like the creak of a second hand over the clockface. And then it was moving again, but everything was blurred, everything was too bright, everything was broken. Shen Li felt something ashen scrape at his throat, and wondered whether this was what firebenders felt in the moment before they belched flame.

He knew that if he could, if he did, the man in front of him would be gone. But instead, he gritted his teeth, bowed as low as he was able, and rose with all the elegance and finesse a lifetime at Court had drilled into him. And as he stood, he caught a flash of Hui's eyes, felt his own gaze bore back in return, and knew one thing.

There was no going back from here.

* * *

Aang woke, oddly awake for such little sleep. In fact, it was as if he'd skipped the entire process of waking up all together. His eyes were wide open and he felt alertness running through his veins, along with a sense of uneasiness he couldn't shake.

It wasn't a state that was foreign to him. They'd spent most of the last year as fugitives, after all, and when you were running away from the most powerful Nation in the world, it definitely helped to have a sixth sense for danger. Still, it took him all of a moment to remember where he was, and he frowned. What could possibly be sneaking up on them now, after the war, and in the ruins of the Eastern Air Temple?

He rolled over and assessed the situation. Beside him, Toph still slumbered, but as he shifted she stirred as well. He was up and eyeing the land beyond the bison saddle for shadows when she spoke.

"Twinkletoes?" she muttered sleepily. "What's going on?"

Aang lifted his face to the sky. It was still night, or at the very least, really early in the morning. For some reason, the sight made something strange and unsettling leapt in his chest. _Time. Time..._

"Hey," her voice grew sharper. "Aang?"

He started, and the coil of uneasiness inside him reared it's head. "Something's wrong," he said in a low voice. "I can't describe it."

That woke her up instantly too. With the ease of an old veteran, Toph slid forwards beside him. She was about to bend herself to the earth when Aang stopped her.

"No," he wrinkled his brow. "It's not... whatever it is, I don't think it's something you can feel."

She hmmphed. "Thought you said you couldn't describe it."

The furrows in his forehead grew deeper. "I can't," he muttered, staring at the sky again. The stars seemed to stare right back at him from their great distance, their shreds of white fire burning bright in his eyes.

And it was the sight of them that triggered something.

In a flash, Aang was ready. He gripped his staff in one hand, and he manoeuvred his way to the back of the saddle for a quick run-off. Toph started at the suddenness of it all.

"What are you doing?" she hissed softly. "Dammit, Twinkles, give me an answer."

Aang merely stared at the sky... and the top of the mountain silhouetted against it. "Wait here with Appa and Momo, Toph. I need to get to the Temple."

* * *

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A/N: Okay, I really apologise if this chapter was a little scrambled, had spelling mistakes, and/or mades no sense. Let's just say that I started today with less than a page of writing, and then suddenly churned all of this out in under four hours because I couldn't bear to think of delaying too much further. Because you guys and your reviews seriously rock my world.

This chapter is for you lovely, lovely people who let me know what you're thinking, and for all the others who are still reading! Thanks so much again. In cases like these, it is you guys, literally, who keep me writing.

So, erm, (nudge nudge, wink wink) please review? :P

-Shadowhawke


	27. The Futures to Win

**Chapter 27: The Futures to Win**

A/N I: Wow. After so many months, over 170,000 words... this is the end of this road. I just want to thank every single reader who's taken the time to share this journey with me, and then a special, special thanks to the people who've been this story's support as they've reviewed, given me feedback, and encouraged me all the way. Finally, one last thanks to the awesome Ellarose C, who has created some beautiful fanart for this fic! Check them out in my profile. :)

So there we go. Thanks again, hope you enjoy this close (despite the jumping around), and I hope even more that you'll be joining me for the next Arc of this story. Coming soon. :)

* * *

_So fire will burn, 'til it burns out its fuel,_

_Of conflict and hatred and futures to win,_

_What births from flame's alchemy may live to rule,_

_And where the stream ends, the ocean begins._

_

* * *

_Suki peered over the ship's edge at the water beneath. The ocean churned and spilled around them, froth bubbling up from the depths and leaving a stream of white in their wake as they continued inexorably North. Above her, the sky roiled threateningly, grey clouds obscuring the blue. Unconsciously, she shivered and pulled her coat tighter around her.

It had been a day. A day since he finished his story, a day since the Water Tribe ship had arrived, a day since Sokka had seen _her_. And the time had given Suki plenty of moments to think, to piece together the previous gaps in her knowledge, the changes in him, and to dwell on the changes he was displaying now.

And the changes in her.

She shook her head at herself and leaned against the railings. "Oh Suki," she whispered to the sea. Down below, her reflection was chased away by the foam and frozen in chunks of floating ice. "Look at you. Captain of the Kyoshi warriors, a war hero, a tessenjutsu master... and you're aching over a boy."

The words rung hollow in her mind. She wasn't just all of that, and he wasn't just a boy. He was Sokka. And when she'd first heard of his tryst with Yue in that awful play, she'd been amused if uncertain. The way it had been portrayed was just so hilariously badly acted and ridiculous. Not to mention they had had other, more pressing matters on their mind.

But now, after the end and in the face of her boyfriend's growing distance, Suki took her knowledge of the real story and examined it carefully in her hands. She wasn't sure what to think. Part of her was a little vengeful that he'd found someone else, even after she'd made her intentions clear with a kiss. And yet another part whispered that that kiss had never been the most serious, that she was just saying she liked him. She hadn't meant to seal an engagement with it or anything! Logically, she didn't have any sort of prior claim, she reluctantly concluded. And even if she had, she didn't want to think about it that way.

No. If she was honest with herself, what bothered her was not that Sokka had met someone else. In all his travels, she would have hardly been surprised. Because ultimately, he was here with her now, and after the weeks together, the budding attraction had become something much more solid, more real. More of a something that she could happily commit to.

No. What bothered her was the last voice, the tiniest, most insidious whisper.

_Are you the replacement?_

Normally she would have brushed it off with a laugh. Her? The replacement? She was Suki of the Kyoshi warriors. She was the defender of her island. She was _not_ a replacement.

And yet... he'd never told her. Not until she pushed. And he'd been so careful, and so distant, and there was something missing from his touch. Suki hugged her arms around her frame and stared down at the water, as if it might yield answers. Answers besides the most obvious one that had leapt into her mind when she'd seen how he'd stared at that girl, how he'd walked towards her, how he'd spoken...

_You're the replacement._

Suki's fingers curled around the railing. No. No, that couldn't be right. She was being silly. She was being an idiot. She was being unreasonable. She was belittling every special moment she and Sokka had ever shared, and there were a lot. The young Captain of the Kyoshi Warriors straightened and surveyed the ocean with a steely eye, her back stiff and proud. She was a replacement for nobody.

"Suki?"

She unclasped her fingers from the railing and turned before thinking. And the sight that greeted her shattered through all of her convictions. Sokka shifted in front of her, his eyes veiled and distant. In the darkened grey light of the threatening sky, there was almost a deadness to him, an inanition that weighted his body. The very sight was such a far cry from his normal laughing, open affection that she almost wavered then and there. He was standing two meters away from her, and yet the gulf seemed like an abyss.

Above them, the clouds gathered thicker. She swallowed. "Yes?"

"I just wanted to tell you to get ready. We're almost there."

Startled, Suki glanced up. Before, all of her had been focused upon him, upon the shape of him. But now she saw the background, and the sheer ice walls widened her eyes.

So this was the city. The city where he'd changed, where he'd found someone so beautiful and perfect that she shone. And with all her fears and worries crashing down on her, the words were out of her mouth before she thought.

"If you could choose, Sokka, would you choose me?"

The suddenness surprised both of them, and for a moment, the distance dropped from his eyes "Suki?"

Her hands reached out blindly behind her and clutched the railing for support. And then the words slid out again, thick as poison and sweet as desperation. "Would you? If you could choose, would you choose me?"

There were three movements. Three movements that raised her hopes, slung tight her nerves, and then dashed her heart to shreds. He gaped, he stared, and then he paused.

The pause was a moment too long.

Suki felt something seize within her, something cold, and for the first time ever she realised what it might mean to marry into the Water Tribe, to possibly live amongst ice. Her limbs felt like they couldn't move, but she forced them to anyway. She wasn't a warrior for nothing. Her head lifted high, her hands pushed herself off the railing and she walked forwards and then around him, steady and proud.

As she passed him, the last hopeful part of her glanced out the corner of her eye, wanting to see some sign. An upraised hand, a moving leg to block her path. But nothing came. He was frozen.

So be it. She inhaled the cold, freezing air of the North and spoke like frost in the wind.

"It's over, Sokka."

He said nothing. She walked away, each step feeling like she was stomping on her own heart. And five minutes later, like a man awaking out of some dream, Sokka reached out his hand to stop empty air.

* * *

6:00pm, Fire Nation Capitol, West Square

It had started out as a fun trip, to see a little of the capitol, to fill up the empty hours, and to distract themselves from their grief and displacement. And it had _started_ all right. Lee hadn't been able to believe his eyes. There was a maze of smaller streets, which ran like a warren beneath the shadow of the Palace and the great noble buildings. And while the streets themselves had been relatively clean and well-looking, there was a feeling of dankness about them, of hidden secrets and a blackness only hinted at. The contrast had been startling against the soaring architecture of the Palace beyond, and it hadn't taken long for his mother to thin her lips and suggest taking a nicer route.

Pauzon had seemed only too eager to comply. Lee had walked between them both, noting their edginess and wondering why he was feeling edgy too. Perhaps it was just because it was so different, he thought to himself uncomfortably. So big. So busy.

And then a prickle had run along his neck as they walked into a grand square. Outwardly, it seemed magnificent. The ground was a paved mosaic, each individually painted and patterned tile joining up to create the familiar symbol of the Fire Nation. And yet this one was stylised... instead of being all black, there were flickers of orange and yellow near the tips of the painted flames. Combined with its size, the square made for an impressive sight. But then his eyes had raised, and he had seen a group of people gather near the bottom and block out the base of the fire, and the way they were talking seemed...

A few minutes later, the had broken out.

Now, he, Pauzon and Nioka stood frozen in the square as the group of men and women began yelling, began chanting. One man got up drunkenly on a park bench and began slurring obscenities. Lee felt his mother cover his ears, but the pressure wasn't enough to drown out her words.

"Pauzon! How do we get out here quickly?"

The old farmer glanced around, his eyes sharp. "We can't run," he said in a low voice. "That may make us a target. But start moving, slowly."

Lee felt his heart leap up into his throat. Not fifty meters away from them, a bottle smashed. Wine leaked out and drenched the painted tiles of the flame. They walked away as quickly as they could without looking like they were fleeing, not daring to glance back at the escalation behind. Lee shook with the force of it, his instincts whispering in his mind to run as fast as he could, and his reason weighing his muscles down with lead. What would happen if they didn't get out in time? If it all exploded? He felt his mother's hands unclasp from around his ears and snatch his fingers instead, holding on so tightly he thought they might break. As the shouting grew louder, he clutched tightly back.

And then the shouting reached a tidal roar, and the three couldn't help but turn. And at the sight, Lee gasped.

"Mom, Mom! Is that the Fire Lord?"

But it was Pauzon who answered. The old farmer's face was haggard, his face brooding and backlit against the street lamps. With a low _hrrmph_ from deep within his throat, he sighed. "Yes, lad."

Lee wrinkled his nose, trying to reconcile the image with the infamous 'traitor prince' and Lady Katara's tale of his honour. What he saw was a scarred youth with a crown pinned at his topknot, with a spiral of flame gradually building below his feet to lift him up into the air and above the crowd. He stared in awe. He'd never seen such advanced firebending, such regality, such...

"He looks like he's in control," Nioka said uncertainly, her free hand clutching at her skirts. "But still, Pauzon... we have to get out of here. It's not safe."

Even as they started moving again, Lee craned his neck back in fascination. "Mom, why's he so calm?"

Nioka's eyes narrowed. "Maybe he doesn't care," she spat. "Whatever. _I_ don't care. We're almost there, let's just get out of here before we're trampled!"

Pulled along by his mother, Lee took one last glance backwards, back to the scene from hell. With the size of the square, the shouting seemed quieter now, somehow outdone by the clear, compelling tones of the scarred young man with a crown. Lee watched as the Fire Lord stood on his pillar of flame, as he ordered the guards to use the flats of their blades and their fire to guide, not burn. He watched the throng mass around him, shouting and yelling, and at his even-handed response.

And as he turned back to step into safety, leaving the Fire Lord behind, Lee found himself whispering.

"Or maybe he does care," he said quietly. "Maybe he cares a lot."

* * *

8:43pm, Fire Nation Capitol, Fire Lord's Private Study

**To Uncle Iroh,**

**You once told me that the truth is nothing to be ashamed of. I hope that's true, because I'm telling you the truth now. I feel... lost, Uncle. The nobles are wary, people are angry... I'm worried that some of my own Ministers are plotting against me. I'm not sure if I can do this... I don't know **_**what**_** I can do. Even if I manage to achieve some sort of miracle and pull the Fire Nation back together, the rest of the world still hates us! I...**

**Please, Uncle. I need your help. What should I do?**

**- Zuko  
**

* * *

Mai covered a yawn and stretched, feeling each muscle tighten and release. Somewhere close by, she could hear Katara moving around, the material from her bedroll rustling as she got up and out. Mai stretched out again, knowing that she should get up too, but the simple content of a well-deserved sleep kept her eyes closed and her form still.

Well, if she was honest with herself, it wasn't just the well-deserved sleep keeping her in bed. Once she got up, she knew there would be nothing left between her and the Fire Nation but a few hours, and that thought was more daunting than it should have been. Despite the constant danger, the almost-death, the running, the fighting and the surviving that had been her life the last few days, there had also been a certain simple freedom to it. One that she knew would vanish as soon as she put her foot back in Court.

_Actually it hasn't been all simple here either, _a whispering voice reminded her. Mai hid a scowl behind her closed lids and pushed away the thought, along with the image of the young man that had accompanied it. But she couldn't push it away for long. After all, he was back in the Capitol as well, and that would mean she would have to face him and...

And so what? Mai unconsciously rolled up a little tighter in her bed. They'd talked. He'd been a good fighting partner. Together, they had completed their mission. There was nothing to it...

Except that there _was_ something. The traitorous voice in her mind struck again. _ He held you, he searched for you, he came back. You can talk to him, you fought so well together, you tried to kill him and then threw whatever you had back in his face. _

Mai let the frown curve her lips now, and she opened her eyes. The Fire Nation tundra stretched in front of her, vast and seemingly endless from her position on the ground. And yet she knew that it would end. Knew that it would lead her back to the city, and inevitably back to _them_. To the scheming courtiers. To her parents. To her ex. To the guard captain she doubted she'd be able to avoid, because they'd both promised to serve her ex.

For a moment, the thoughts were almost enough to make her wish that she could stay in bed forever. But that was just for a moment. With characteristic grace, Mai chose the next instant to slide silently from her bed and move, first into a crouch and then into standing straight up - her back arched, her posture as proud as a Fire Nation noblewoman.

Well so what. She had challenges and a screwed-up situation to get back to, but she was not herself for nothing. She had faced her childhood in the court of a mephitic, warring country and survived, albeit with the cost of forming a mask from her own flesh. But then with that mask, she had lasted for years at the Academy, as friend to the dangerous, unpredictable Fire Princess, as her parents' daughter. And after that, she had endured the toxicity of her relationship with the Fire Prince, the soul-blackening grasp of prison, and the end of a century-old war, only to find that somewhere along the way, the mask had begun melding painfully back into her face.

Things had changed. Mai glanced once more across the landscape, and saw the far off spires of the Palace glitter in the distance. It would be a good few hours' riding to whatever awaited them, but she'd be damned if she wasn't ready to face it.

After all, she was Lady Mai.

And as her gaze drifted, landed on the waterbender by her pack, she allowed herself a small smile.

She was Lady Mai, and she was not alone.

* * *

Katara yawned and stretched. La, it felt so good! The sunshine warmed her cheek and skin as she reached out and felt her muscles tingle. Content, she climbed out of her bedroll and went looking for her pack, falling into the simple, casual routine of finding breakfast.

A routine that was frozen as soon as she remembered where they were heading.

Back. They were heading back. The fruit in her hand almost dropped as Katara sunk against her pack, the thoughts swirling in her mind. It hadn't really been that long, now that she thought about it. Only nine days, a little over a week. And yet it had seemed much, much longer.

Katara felt older as she huddled, the apple clutched nervelessly in her fingers. It seemed like it had been centuries ago that she and Zuko had defeated Azula, that she and Aang had frozen the air between them, that she had left the Capitol and her friends behind to strike out for herself. And so much had changed to reflect that. Katara closed her eyes and remembered first Yue's comforting glow, the Painted Lady's enigmatic smile, and then finally, her mother's shining love. She remembered the sating of the restlessness in her, the feeling that had almost engulfed her and then ebbed away as she found the place she'd been struggling for - between blood and water, warrior and healer, mother and Katara. She remembered the thrill of the fight, the firm knowledge and reassertion of her own destiny,and the finding of Mai.

The only question was, was it enough? Enough to settle the ache of the inner wound that had set her on this path in the first place? Katara worried her lip. Going back would mean seeing everyone again. Confronting the friends she'd left so suddenly without warning. Seeing the proof of her selfishness...

No. Katara straightened her shoulders and glared at the far-off horizon, as if it were an enemy to intimidate. _No_. She had needed this, and they were _not_ going to make her feel guilty. She was stronger, more sure, more ready than she had ever been in her entire life to leap into her future with outstretched arms. She had seen too much and learnt too much in the past nine days to taint it, to taint herself. The mere assertion of it quietened her mind, and Katara found herself smiling proudly. She had walked away, but she was coming back now, armed with a firm knowledge of a threat in the Fire Nation and the knowledge that she could and would choose to help defeat it.

_I will never turn my back on the people who need me_

Thoughts settled, Katara glanced up just in time to see a shadow fall across her lap. Raising her head, she saw Mai's thin figure standing in front of the sun, her perpetually bored expression looking almost determined in the light.

"Are you ready?" she rasped.

_Are you ready?_

Katara took a deep breath, and nodded. "Let's go."

* * *

On the sea, over a thousand miles away, Kata yawned, stretched, and then blinked in the darkness. Sometime during the night, the candle had burnt out, and deep in the belly of the ship, it was almost completely black. Stumbling, the old waterbender stood, trying to grope for the spark stones.

_Schnikt!_

There was a violent clack of stone across stone, and a light leapt to darkly illuminate the room. Kata jumped, and turned to see Hama looking at her. The other woman was smiling, and Kata blinked again.

"Hama?" she asked unsuredly. "What's happening?"

Across from her, Hama smiled. "We're here. I heard them talking up above."

"But we're still moving," Kata looked confused. "In fact, it seems we're moving more than ever..."

"Storm's coming in," Hama grinned this time, her teeth flashing dull in the candlelight. "The water's agitated. But we'll be docked by the time it hits."

Kata's breath caught in her throat. "Just like that? So quick?_"_

Hama nodded. "Just like that," she repeated, and for some reason her voice had an echo of two rocks striking violently together. "We're here, and now everything can finally begin."

* * *

On the land, perhaps even further away, Kama yawned and stretched. The floor length windows of the suite let vast shafts of light brighten the room, illuminating everything in sight. Smiling gently, the old woman padded over to the table that had been set up, and the Pai Sho game that she'd been amusing herself with.

She'd been taught to play long ago. Pai Sho was a rare game in the Water Tribes, but it so happened that her father had been a trader who had brought an old set home. After painstakingly learning the rules, they'd moved on to figuring out the tiles, the strategies, the games one could play.

To be honest, it was something of a miracle that she still remembered after all this time. After everything. Kama lightly brushed one of the pieces and pushed away the darker memories, trying to focus on the lighter ones. Her father was often away, and her mother and Kata didn't like the game. So she'd gotten used to playing with herself, to seeing the elaborate patterns she could legitimately make, the quick and deadly strategies that could annihilate an opponent with one move, turning a seemingly innocent board into a fatal trap. The smile faded from her face as she saw recognised the pattern she'd unconsciously moved it into now.

It was the middle form of the viper-snake's gambit, so called because several vital points were attacked at once, just like disturbing a nest of viper-snakes could result in death by several causes. Unbidden, her thoughts drifted to the riot she'd heard of, and the difficulties sometimes whispered loud enough by the palace servants to be picked up by old ears.

She never thought she'd live to see the end of the war. And she never thought she'd be able to survive her own overwhelming bitterness. But now, clad in a simple gown, playing Pai Sho, and staying as a personal guest of the Fire Lord while she drew herself back into peace and waited, she couldn't help but fear that it would all change again. That the near and surprising heaven she had found herself thrust into might degenerate once more into a hell.

Kama settled herself down on the chair and stared at the tiles. She was a simple woman, really. She just wanted to rest, to give herself time to fully dig herself out of the blackness that had swallowed most of her life. She had tried doing so under the hideous burden of hate and anger, but she was so tired she'd let her hold slip, and who could blame her? Not her sister. Not her people, and certainly not the person who she thought would be her ultimate murderer, the Fire Lord, who was now giving her a little something back. Something more than a bed to sleep in, a room to stay in and food to eat. Something a little more like hope and pride - the chance to meet the Southern Waterbender who had helped to end the war.

She sighed. If only Kata had thought of it that way. She couldn't help but just wonder now where her sister was, what she was doing. She was probably almost at the North Pole. She'd certainly met up with Hama.

The thought sent a chill down her spine, and Kama blinked. Spots appeared, and then cleared away to reveal the middle stage of the viper-snake's gambit again. The smooth tiles winked at her, beckoned, and Kama felt the same uncomfortable chill at the position even as she pushed her sister's coldness to the back of her mind.

And then, frowning slightly and trying to remember the next move, Kama began to play.

* * *

"_What do you want?"_

"_I want the world," the man said. "I want you to take the third boat."_

"_How is that any different?" _

"_It will allow you to be contacted, and to be used. I would hurry. It leaves soon."_

There wasn't a day that went by that Feng didn't remember the conversation or didn't remember the way Hawk-eyes had smiled. But today, the memory struck him every time he took note of what he was doing, realised the position he'd worked himself and his men into.

Feng glanced up and straightened for a moment, taking a break from the heavy work to cast a sharp, surveying glance at his men. They had all remained disciplined and obediently close, looking all the world like the earthbending soldiers he had promised the Avatar and his blind teacher.

Feng's normally stoic face soured. He still didn't know how they had passed that test. He'd heard rumours that the little girl could tell truth from lies and was the most powerful earthbender in the world. If only a tenth of them were true, he and his team should have been discovered the moment he'd taken his first breath.

Only they hadn't. Granted, it wasn't _exactly_ a lie - if you stretched it out, the Dai Li could be thought of as Earthbending soldiers. Still, it had been a stretch, and the moment that her sightless eyes had rested on him had been one of the longest moments of his life...

Feng shook himself with irritation and went back to work. In one swift move, he formed a solid brick from the crumbled masonry around them and stacked it onto the growing wall. What was he thinking? Here he was, a grown man and the esteemed leader of a highly trained force, and he was quailing in the memory of a little girl. No. The rumours were probably just rumours - stories spread to make the defeated Dai Li who'd faced the Avatar and his team look heroic instead of pathetic. He didn't have time to waste on things like that, not when he had a greater worry.

They'd been in Ba Sing Se for three days now. The first, they had arrived late at night, the second they had spent mostly finding accommodation and laying low. Hawk-eyes hadn't given any specifics about being 'contacted', after all. Feng had pragmatically given the Fire Nation lunatic one week, before planning to move out and melt into even further anonymity.

But it had only taken one day. The eve of the second night, a letter had arrived ordering them to present themselves before the Avatar and his teacher. And Feng had cursed behind his blank facade, before he had turned to his men and delivered the news. After all, hadn't they run all this way to escape the Avatar and his reach?

Still, it wasn't as if his team had ever personally faced the Avatar, and the memory of Hawk-eyes' smile and the promise that the dream of Dai Li ascendance wasn't necessarily over had been enough to let him take the plunge. He hadn't thought it would lead to this, though.

Feng sealed the next brick with earthbending and moved on - boring, repetitious, draining work. Around him, he saw the same feeling written in his men's eyes, and he wondered how long they would have to put up with this menial work. It was true that they were in a position of trust now, as part of the mixed team propping Ba Sing Se brick by brick back onto its feet. But as the future stretched into days in front of him, he wondered how long it would take before the promise would be fulfilled. Before they would be contacted again...

He needn't have worried.

One moment, there was just the sound of crashing rock, of his men's harsh breathing and his own throbbing pulse as he worked and thought and planned for survival. The next, the sound was overshadowed by mid-darkness as a figure stepped into the doorway, blocking out the street's light.

The men, well-trained as they were, instantly froze and turned, the bricks they were forming balanced in the air and ready to be reshaped as deadly weapons at any moment. And for his part as their leader, Feng turned calmly to face the stranger.

Even though the man's features were silhouetted blackly against the sun behind his head, Feng could instantly tell that it wasn't Hawk-eyes. A small part of him was neither surprised, but as he looked closer, neither was it relieved. With his trained eyes, he noted a distinct cruelty to those haggard cheekbones, a cunning in the shadowed smirk. Although he was of average height, he stood with such lean and muscular finesse that his confidence virtually dripped off the walls and doused them all in sourness. But what disturbed Feng most was the slightly unhinged glint in his eyes, and the shiver that ran down his own spine as he saw it.

All of this he saw in seconds, but what took him a moment longer was the implicit message in the other's arrogance. Finally, the man drew himself taller, eyes sweeping lazily across the room.

"Time to move out," he drawled, and left.

The sudden rush of light back into the room was almost blinding. Feng blinked as his vision cleared, even as his thoughts remained in a tightly controlled whirl. So. It was beginning.

And as he focused, and saw his men looking at him in question, felt his mouth move around the monotone of "You heard him. Follow"... he only hoped the ending would be worth it.

* * *

3:57pm, Fire Nation Capitol, Fire Lord's Private Study

_To Zuko,_

_I have full faith, my dear nephew, that you are doing as best you can in the circumstances. I'm sorry I cannot be there with you now. All I can do is offer a suggestion._

_Once, long ago, a young boy with turmoil in his heart attempted to create lightning, so that he might be greater empowered to build the world he wished. Now, a young man who has achieved much may find a lesson and a guide in mastering the last step of firebending. _

_Remember, it is in the separation of the balance of yin and yang, and then the force as they come back together that great energy can be harnessed. Remember that you are its humble servant. Perhaps it will help shed light on your situation._

_Until then, keep your friends close, and do not be afraid._

_- Iroh_

Zuko let the scroll fall from his fingertips. It fluttered gently to the surface of his desk, and he left it there, staring at it like it might hold some answer.

Lightning. What did his Uncle mean? Why did it always have to be so cryptic?

Why did it all have to be so difficult? The young Fire Lord fell back into his chair and gazed at the ceiling. It too stubbornly withheld any answers it might have had. He scowled at it, out of spite, and his tired eyes wondered if the lines in the stone scowled back.

Another riot. He shook his head. Granted, he'd been more prepared for this one this time. A message from General Sheng after the meeting had warned him of fresh security information about a possible conflagration. At the thought of that, he scowled again. His Minister for Security had been surprisingly quick and efficient with the message, and his forces had been very good at cleaning up afterwards. He knew he should have been grateful, but the very strong sense of distrust that breathed down his neck every single time he saw the man felt stronger.

If only he could just step out of line, enough that Zuko could bring his fist down in all finality. If only Hang could as well. If only the riots could stop, the country would settle, the world would stop hating. If only, if only...

Zuko shook himself out of it. One step at a time. He couldn't afford to slump into despair, he knew that. He just didn't have the luxury. Straightening, he studied his uncle's letter once again, trying to pinpoint exactly what the old man was trying to say. Even though he'd like to think that experience had steeped him in the art of decoding Iroh's wisdom, he was still just as perplexed in the face of the latest one. How would lightning solve anything? That was a fighting technique. Sure, he could use it to fry his Ministers (he took a moment to indulge the brief fantasy) but that would just bring the entire nobility and Court structure down around his head.

Zuko's regretful musings were broken by a knock. Starting, Zuko rose from his chair by instinct.

"Enter!" he called out tiredly, lifting his fingers up to massage the bridge of his nose. The familiar movement calmed him a little, so much that he didn't even realise the settled power in the tone of his voice.

Somehow, he was not surprised when Shen Li strode in. But that didn't mean he was prepared for what he had to say. The guard captain stopped only to bow, and before his head lifted up he was already speaking.

"Zuko! Lady Mai and Lady Katara have returned!"

For a moment, Zuko sat struck dumb. Shen Li saw it, and continued.

"The messenger just reached me from the gate - they want to come in to report. When should I tell them?"

The words dropped like game pieces on a board, and a strange sense of unearthliness crept over him, like purified life out of fire. Zuko shook his head. "Everything's happening right now, isn't it?" he asked quietly, staring at Iroh's letter in front of him. "It's all happening."

He felt the guard captain's gaze rest questioningly on him, and he looked up, straightened. The odd feeling rolled away from him like a flowing cloak, leaving a young, burnt Fire Lord in charge.

He took a deep breath, and exhaled. "Tell them to come here right away" he ordered. "There is much to attend to."

Shen Li nodded, bowed quickly, and was off again. Faintly, Zuko could hear his boots slapping on the carpet outside, and hmmed to himself in approval. There _was_ something, he told himself. There were allies, friends he could count on. There were those he could hold close, he could trust...

Unbidden, Zuko's gaze drifted from his desk to the floor, the map, and the bloody soldiers that covered it. Yes, there were those he could trust. Now all he had to do was hope that together, they could engineer a miracle.

* * *

Aang found himself running down the mountain, away from the Air Temple, and back to the earth.

It was different, this time. Subtle, and yet markedly so. For one, he had to descend back down before he could get back to Appa. For two, this time Toph and Momo were waiting for him. But most importantly, this time he wasn't running away, he was running _to_.

_Aang snapped the glider closed. Some time along the way, as he'd ridden the gusts of winds upwards, he'd felt the undeniable heaviness of a storm begin to press down. Now as the wind whipped through his clothes and screamed in his ear, he knew that he wouldn't be able to ride back down amidst the maelstrom._

_With that in mind, he turned and saw the Guru already there. And things were already different. The aura of serenity around Pathik was still there, but noticeably lessened. And for once, he didn't wait for Aang to approach and sit down, he spoke first._

"_Aang! You _must_ go back to Ba Sing Se."_

_He didn't ask, didn't question, because somewhere inside him, he knew that Pathik wouldn't have the answer. So instead, he settled for a confirmation._

"_Something bad is happening, isn't it?" he asked._

_The Guru nodded. "Run, and listen to your soul." _

Aang felt the change, felt the strength radiate around him. His sandalled feet were a whir as they sprung off the ground, his descent quick, sure and _fast_ as only an airbender Avatar could. Within moments, he sighted the bulk of his animal companion, and then he was there. Leaping high into his element and letting it carry him to Appa's head, he grasped the reins.

"Appa, yip yip!"

The air bison rolled, and then lifted without a groan. Behind him, he heard a yelp of surprise.

"Twinkletoes? Dammit, tell me what's happening _now_!"

Aang wound the reins around his fingers. "We're going back," he said, his voice strong and sure. "Something bad has happened, and we're needed."

For a moment, there was nothing but the whip of the wind. And then above them, the storm clouds were shattered with a thunderclap. The sound rolled ominously across the sky, speeding ahead of them towards the city of Ba Sing Se, and when it was over, he heard Toph speak again.

It was simple. Three words. "Are you ready?" she asked, and for some reason, the question made him close his eyes.

_Three old men sitting around a blocky table. One old woman with her hands clawing at the rain. Two young girls dancing through blasts of fire, the first sleek with water and the other sharp as steel. A mask of blackened flesh that crumbled away to reveal a scar. The earth shifting beneath feet to crush someone's bones to powder. The marching of soldiers feet over soil and rock, inexorable and deadly. The smell of smoke and burning. Fire. Earth. Water. A child screaming. Someone laughing..._

This time, Aang felt a strange inexorableness well up in him alongside the sickening fear. True, he didn't have all the answers. But he had some, and what he knew made him set his shoulders, raise his chin, open his eyes and stare straight into the face of the threatening horizon ahead.

"If I'm not ready," he said flatly, "I will be."

* * *

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The Alchemy of Fire - Arc I: _Nigredo_

_-finis-_

* * *

-_To come_-

The Alchemy of Fire - Arc II: _Albedo_

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* * *

  
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	28. Arc II: Preview

**Preview: The Alchemy of Fire - Arc II: Rubedo**

* * *

**A/N - **Just letting everyone know, the whole first chapter of The Alchemy of Fire - Arc II: Rubedo is up now! Check it out on my author's page, or follow this link with the spaces removed. http ://www. fanfiction. net/s/5224560/1/The_Alchemy_of_Fire_Arc_II.

Otherwise, sit back and enjoy the preview. :)

* * *

**Chapter I: Blackened Fire**

**

* * *

**_From reddened ash,_

_And blackened fire,_

_Come ready hearts,_

_To climb the spire -_

_Of rushing heights,_

_Of power great,_

_Of friends and foes,_

_Of love and hate._

* * *

The city of Ba Sing Se was burning.

For one brief, horrible, moment, Toph thought that she'd been hurled violently back in time. Radiant heat seared her face, making the blood rush in her veins. ... that's a lot of fire, isn't it? And she was in the air, she couldn't 'see'...

And then Appa groaned under them, and she remembered. It wasn't her, Sokka, and Suki in a tiny unmanned airship against an entire fleet. It was her, Aang, Momo and Appa against...

"Twinkletoes! What's going on?!"

The city of Ba Sing Se was burning. Aang watched the scene with wide, horrified eyes, his hands slack on the reins. Flame belched from the shells of half-finished houses, the smoke trailing thick and oily through what should have been a clear, beautiful sky. But it wasn't the spoiling of the vista that clenched his heart. It was the symbolism, the hate, and the tiny figures far below, already adding blood to the fuel.

Three old men sitting around a blocky table. One old woman with her hands clawing at the rain. Two young girls dancing through blasts of fire, the first sleek with water and the other sharp as steel. A mask of blackened flesh that crumbled away to reveal a scar. The earth shifting beneath feet to crush someone's bones to powder. The marching of soldiers' feet over soil and rock, inexorable and deadly. The smell of smoke and burning. Fire. Earth. Water. A child screaming. Someone laughing...

Feet were not marching now. Aang could see the chaotic running, the frenzied panic of people scattering like dust in the wind. But only some were fleeing from the inferno. Others, far more, too many, were running towards each other, spilling more red into the world. From their passing, Aang could hear the screaming of the burnt, crushed and dying fill in his ears.

All my fault...

"AANG!"

Aang snapped out of his shock as a small, dirty hand clumsily grasped his shoulder. He twisted around to see Toph shaking, her small figure caught halfway between the saddle and Appa's head. Without thinking, he grabbed her fingers and airbended them both back to safety, where her relative sightlessness wouldn't send them toppling to their deaths.

Not that that move in itself didn't provoke a response from his teacher. "Aaaargh! Warn me next time, will you?"

"Sorry," he shook his head, like a man awakening from a sick dream. "It's just... Ba Sing Se is burning."

Toph snorted in disgust. "Look, even the blind girl can tell that! But what's actually happening?"

Aang felt her crisp demand penetrate through the numbness of his disbelief, his horror. He took a deep breath and settled, trying to inject some sense of reality into his voice. "Houses are burning through all three rings, but they're mostly the unfinished ones in the Upper tier. But there are people everywhere in the streets, fighting again."

Toph swore. "Get us down there."

"Okay."

There was nothing else he could say to that. Aang took another deep, shuddering breath, nodded firmly, and lifted himself back to Appa's head. Coiling his hand around his friend's left horn, he closed his eyes and felt the sky bison's fear, mirroring his own.

He swallowed. "Come on, buddy," he murmured, stroking his fur.

Appa paused, hovering in the air, and then went into a spiralling dive. About two meters off from the ground. Aang caught up Toph's hand and leapt. Both landed in unison, sending shivers of earth rumbling through the land, toppling already collapsing houses and engulfing the remains in dirt. And then they were up and running, following the screams, the Avatar's eyes caught by the bursts of human flame, and Toph's feet drawn by the heartbeats of hatred.

Neither of them, however, noticed the people skulking in the dark-lit shadows of the smoke, hesitating only briefly as they saw Aang's arrows before joining the fight.

* * *


End file.
